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"One day the sun shines on the world..." Wechat: CS1_SOLAIRE99 Whatsapp: +66634622578
"... to show images with different light."
"All lines are in place..."
"... but between without or shade,"
"Only shadows of the past illuminate the aging brain,"
"Fading with sunshine which starts to disappear..."
"Sweep away all traces yesterday."
Are there questions for the author?
Hey, Dad.
Can you slow down the music?
What?
The music, can you slow it down?
Yes...
Sorry.
Your building administrator told me if they cut your electricity.
Yes.
Why don't you pay your bills?
Because I'm done with that. I don't have to do that anymore.
I will disappear from circulation.
What does that mean?
That means I have finished with all systems.
What systems are all? / All systems are man-made.
I quit my job. I didn't pay the bill.
You quit your job? / Yes. I got out of it.
How are you going to eat?
No, I don't need to buy more food.
I realize that.
I can get free milk at Starbucks.
I can get tomato sauce free at McDonald's. / Tomato sauce?
The body can only survive with tomato sauce for a long time.
At least until the end of the world.
Marco, Dad will stop by tomorrow,
And you will bring you food.
No, I don't need food. I'm okay with tomato sauce.
Just wait in your apartment... / Don't do it.
Listen, wait in your apartment 6. hours. I won't be there.
Father will go there. See you later. Dah.
They call me Luna.
Because my mind moves in tune with the moon shift.
They call me crazy...
... because my biological clock is a time bomb...
... who walks back to the minute full moon shines.
And I just came out of a mental hospital,
And I haven't taken my medicine,
So I will be unstable like nitro touching glycerin.
More crazy than Batman Riddler...
... if Jim Carrey has to play it without drinking Ritalin.
I will leave you a hot puzzle rather than a crossword puzzle...
... written by Jack The Ripper.
Filled with instructions about how I will kill you...
... and I will do it right before you realize it...
... so I can blast it on the ground next to your body...
... then let the detective finish check it!
"Fire goes out..."
Black, even smokeless...
... to remember memories will be wild scenes last night...
... then generate magic it back,
Burning the sun at the end of the stem matches with one flick of the finger of God,
... because all eternity disappears... Lost in shadow...
Surrounding my lips like flint evil with fear of silk licking...
It will burn...
Like my spirit spreading!
Moving away from my brain like is stretched...
Shackled... Don't have wings...
Forest fires increase in my eyes... So wild...
Fire the iris!
I am a fire.
I am fire!
Hey./ Hey./What are you doing? / Yes.
Can I come in? / Yes, come in.
Do you know it's almost 1:00 in the morning?
Don't you sleep?
Sorry.
What's wrong?
I just want to talk.
Sure.
Can we see old photo albums?
Now?
Why do you want to do that?
Just to talk about about the past.
I don't know where it is, honey.
It was lost between piles... / I know where it is.
I don't think... / I'll look for it.
Remember that?
That's right before I get sick.
Remember?
What do I look like at that time?
Honey, don't you remember?
No.
You stay the same.
Mother, I want you to be honest with me.
You're the only person who knows me at the time,
And I need you... / No. That is not true.
There are many people in my life who know you at that time.
What did I do when it happened?
What do you mean?
The doctor says if something has triggered it.
So what did I do then? / No...
There is nothing that can do.
That will still happen no matter what.
No, I definitely did something that triggered it...
... because I'm not the same person, Mother. / That's not true.
I'm not the same. / You stay the same.
Can you please stop lying to me!
Well, Carla, you acted very exaggerated right now,
And Mother... Is your sleep alright?
What happened?
I'm just trying to find know who I am,
Because I don't feel like myself anymore.
Even when I take medicine, I don't feel like myself.
OK, you know, honey?
I think we should call Dad because he can be very helpful.
No! / We must.
No, Mom. Sorry. I shouldn't be screaming. I won't shout again.
Please don't call Daddy. / Well, you're right. Sit down
I have a good plan. Well, this is Mother's plan.
You should sleep here tonight,
Then then tomorrow morning, very early,
We will go to the hospital then ask for your file.
They have all the files about your disease.
Then you can learn everything you want.
You can ask anything.
We will find a solution. Understand?
I don't like it when Mother sees me like that.
What is it like? How do you see you?
It's like I'm crazy.
Mother doesn't see you as if you're crazy, honey.
No, you see me as if you don't even recognize me.
No. Honey, Mother loves you./ No.
You miss me first./ No, please don't go.
Donald!
Hey, what's with your apartment?
What do you mean by dad? / Your books scattered on the floor.
Yes, I decided if I was more like it like this.
You can see all the titles is much easier.
And everything is in a different place, certain places.
That's actually very useful...
... because you can bring it anywhere, you know?
You can bring any book that you want at any time. Sit down
There are a lot of the best atmosphere in reading.
I don't know, it just looks stupid, somehow.
Just put a stack of books in one place.
It looks like a thought in a box for me.
Do you understand what I mean?
How do you sleep? / Good.
I just lie down and sleep. That is good.
Everything works fine.
Still taking your medicine?
I don't think it's really working for me, you know,
Like limiting my feelings. Like draining the ocean.
That is not a concoction.
Don't give me lotions.
I just... Yes, it doesn't work, so I stop drinking it.
I stopped.
But you know what I found?
What is that? / Cannabis, Mama.
You suck marijuana? / Yes, that's actually very helpful.
It works better than treatment.
Isn't that interesting?
I think it has something to do with certain chemical substances from my brain,
Something that can make it work.
Do you suck a lot of marijuana?
Depends on how long I stay awake. Do you know?
Later I didn't get enough sleep, so...
I think I increased my dose.
Tomorrow morning, we go to see Dr. Lyons,
Then we ask and listen what is his opinion about that.
Who cares about his opinion? / He is an expert on your disease.
He will know... / I don't have a disease.
Come on... / Why do you carry Dr. Lyons for this?
There is nothing wrong with...
Let's get enough... / Wait! That's... What...
He's an expert in your treatment. / No, he's not an expert!
He is a Nazi!
He doesn't know what he talks about, understand?
Listen! I don't have a disease!
Why don't you go home home tonight with Daddy.
Go home?
Home? / Home. Yes.
Right?
Is he there?
Where is he? / Who?
Mother?
Your mother left because she was sick.
He is sick. He... / Why do you keep saying that?
Mother can't stand it anymore! And you know what happened?
He runs away. Okay.
Do you know why? Because he is a genius.
He is very genius.
Why can't you see that father?
OK.
Count up to ten.
Remember how do you often do that? Remember?
Do you remember this?
OK, count to ten./ Come on.
Count up to ten. Ready? / Yes.
One./One.
Two. / Nine.
Three. / Eight.
Four. / Seven.
Five.
Six. Seven.
Eight. Nine.
Father who is on guard!
Marco, no!
Damn!
Hi. I've been a patient here, and I need a copy of my file.
I know you can give it to me. / Right. What is your name?
Carla. Lucia.
L-U-C-I-A. There. That one.
Can you wait a minute?
Hi. I'm Dr. Strinsky.
Hi.
I want to ask for what you ask for your file?
I don't have to tell you. I know my rights.
You're right. You don't have to tell me.
It's just that I...
Looks like you are upset about something,
And I just want to make sure if...
No. I want a copy of my file. / Sure.
You can come with me to my office, then I'll meet you...
... then if you have a question, I can explain everything,
I will answer your question.
It looks like this started when you were in college.
No.
I'm fine at college.
I made my best writing when I was in college.
I can write all night then go to a party with my friend.
I mean, I have a lot of friends.
I have a good relationship with people.
That may be the beginning of from your illness.
What?
Sleep deprivation,
Being more attractive, more active, wild.
That is the beginning of disease.
You just walk towards the edge.
Do you recognize this?
This is the verse you wrote.
"I beg you, God, let I feel what you feel."
"I will look at the sky with my eyes wide open..."
"... until you burn through my iris flower..."
"... then touch my mind with your fire."
I go to the desert. / Yes.
And you leave this at the front table before you leave.
Then you force open the width of your eyes and stare at the sun.
What is the trigger?
Hello, 911? I was illegally detained in the police station...
That's your one time call.
But I didn't contact outside the police station, so it didn't count.
My place isn't here. It's home hurts for sick people.
I'm not sick.
I understand why you are here. You look so sick to me.
There is no life on your face.
You look like you will be upside down.
And if you ask me, you don't need electric shock therapy.
You need a connection cable that is related to Mack trucks...
... then connect it to your face to light up your dim eyes.
Do you think you are right?
More than you.
Spreading the message through graffiti about the end of the human race...
... that doesn't look sane to me.
You are human, so you are prejudiced.
Do many people who read these messages?
Everything.
How do you know?
From my online fan base.
Can you show me that?
Here.
That. Do you see? 106 million people.
No, that number is the number of people in the entire network.
Actually, only 119 people see your page.
See? / What?
Marco, there are many things that must be considered.
Why don't you let me help you?
Carla Lucia wants to get out.
Sorry.
You can't get out until according to your doctor is okay.
You can... / No...
I registered myself voluntarily last night.
Right, I know, but... / You can't hold me here.
You're still not allowed to go home... / No, you can't hold back...
Contact my mother. Contact him. / He is on his way.
Look, he's on a trip with your clothes.
Hopefully Your Day Is Beautiful Bipolar Support Group
Good morning, Paul. / It's a beautiful morning.
Do you know what will make this morning so beautiful? / What?
You put Adderall into my cup, rather than Seroquel,
And that can be tolerated because is quite similar in color.
Especially with eyes eyes that have not drunk coffee.
The cameras won't see anything.
And you don't have bead eyes, do you know what I mean?
Right. I think the last thing you need is Adderall.
OK. Think about it. . Drink.
Think about it at lunch. / No. Show me...
Thank you.
This is the thought of doom, that is a new beginning.
Gary. / True, but you don't understand...
What? / I pass you on.
That's amazing. How... That... Thank you, friend.
I just tried to tell you what I saw on the card.
Are we the first to say me if you will die?
No, but the fact is if... / I really regret being...
... bearers of bad news. / You scared him. Stop it.
Don't blame the messenger.
Let's play strip poker!
OK, everyone.
There are two new people who joined with us today, Emily and Marco.
I prefer to be called Luna.
Good. This is your nickname? / That is the name of my poet.
OK. Nice.
So how do you feel everything?
Okay, Gary, why don't we start with you.
What did you think of this morning?
Doomsday.
Good.
Does that sound like fear rational or irrational?
Anyone?
Irrational.
OK, Luna, tell Gary why his fear is irrational.
Gary...
You don't need to be afraid of doomsday, because...
... it will happen anyway.
In fact, it's already happened. / Luna.
The world will not end.
Maybe not the world, but the human race.
Gary, don't worry. The human race will not end.
Of course it will end.
Do you think it's coincidence if Nostradamus and the Maya...
... are both predicting that?
No. They see where the planet is headed.
They see people around them unrelenting cutting down trees.
They see humanity being an epidemic.
Do you know what is the definition of disease?
That's when a single organism becomes overgrown...
... to threaten the whole.
And you know what happened when the disease threatened...
... all holistic balance in the Universe?
It increases antibodies.
Well, we discuss something that should not be discussed.
I don't mean anything with that.
You make Gary upset.
Maybe this time, but you don't think it's better...
... so he knows the truth? / That's not the truth.
Why don't you apologize to Gary for making him angry?
Gary, I'm sorry I made you upset.
I don't mean to scare you.
No need to feel upset...
... because consider it like puzzle of earth disease.
Don't you want that?
Don't you think it's a little selfish? / Luna.
What you're doing is good...
Maybe you're a little outrageous. / How can I...
That's why I apologize.
Well, we try to keep it simple.
That's why I apologize. / Quite a simple apology.
You will never graduate like this, Luna. / What are you talking about?
Yes.
What is that? / That is a sign.
There's still a lot to learn, I guess, isn't that right?
Good thinking.
Let's imagine ourselves for a moment...
I don't think it's a problem to...
Everyone here knows how to share. / Can you please stop?
Do you have an opinion about what he said?
This is your first day here, and you are alienating yourself...
... from all groups.
Do you say if I have to hide my opinion...
... so that it can be part of a group?
No.
Why do you pay attention to the group?
That's not true! / That's right. Why are you lying?
I'm not lying! / Why are you lying?
Looks like we have reached deadlock.
We take time to calm yourself, three minutes,
Then we will gather again. Understand?
It's okay. Don't touch, please.
Luna, why aren't you coloring? / Because I'm not inspired.
Well, why don't you look around the book on the shelf.
Maybe it will give you a little inspiration.
Here it is. Van Gogh.
The highest member of the Bipolar Club.
Do you see this?
Yes, that's beautiful. / Really. / Do you know why? Why?
Because this is a sky painting that he saw...
... from the sanitarium window while she is experiencing a bead.
Really? / Yes.
You don't believe it? Check it out. I believe in you.
When you go out at night,
Then you look up at the sky and see how boring it is,
Think if you will be treated with Van Gogh.
Luna.
What kind of poet are you?
Rap. / You rap? / Yes.
The first time I experienced manic, I started rhyming compulsively,
But, you know, it's a symptom of a manic guidebook.
Really? / Yes.
You don't believe me? Check.
Can you show us a little?
Give me a word.
Anti-Christ.
I'm very happy...
... for potential opportunities...
... can be considered as Anti-Christ.
Anti-body for humanity.
Because, God,
If you leave it to me on this planet,
I will give doomsday actions...
... which will get rid of this bug. / What about "Don't Know Shame"?
I'm so shameless,
I don't have a pubic chain that holds back...
... what I do, say or think,
Fear if someone might feel ashamed of that.
"Alone."
I might be alone,
But at least I'm not feeling alone...
... with the closest person that I know...
... because I changed myself itself into something fake...
... to get group praise...
... until I don't know my own soul,
And if you ask me, that is a form of solitude from alone.
That's it?
No more words?
I understand, do you prefer to read that? What is that, the real poem?
Let's see. / Hey...
Luna.
"The sun shines brightly as if it's a burning fire..."
I call the doctor! / Alright... All right!
"Trying so hard every day..."
"... to reach..." / Can you stop it!
"And touch each face." / Stop!
"But they all turned away, glanced condescendingly, grimacing,"
"I don't know how much it is reach the human race,"
"That knows it will always be alienated."
We are all bipolar. Sometimes it's like molars.
You want to revoke it, you want to feel better.
So don't blame the weather. Check solar power.
This is rhyming.
The first card is a cradle symbol.
Don't worry, it's a symbol of life, nothing is fatal.
I will tie you up and give the sisters the syringe to you.
It's not rhyming. / Don't stop to think about it.
Let everything flow. You are the boat.
That's where the best thing happens.
Let it enter then utarakanlah.
But it's pretty good.
You graduated, Luna.
You're one level higher.
Can't sleep? / No.
Want something that can help? / No, I'm going to the art room.
Can't sleep?
No.
So Emily,
May I ask who is the name of your fake length?
Emily Lowell.
What are Emily Dickinson and Robert Lowell?
They are reliable poets.
Do you know both are bipolar?
You think every big artist is bipolar.
It doesn't matter if it helps you.
"We are from all this crazy craft..."
"Some are influenced by excitement, others with melancholy."
"But all is more or less touched."
Do you know who said that?
Lord Byron.
One of the best manic-depressive poets of all time.
That is in the preface to the book Touched with Fire from Kay Jamison.
He is a psychologist,
And when he first started,
I don't know where he experienced manic events.
That scared him.
So he tried to keep it a secret.
But then... Something changes.
He decided to write books about it.
He did all this research,
And he found a relationship of madness between bipolar and genius artists...
... from all history, from all over the world.
Instead of feeling shame because of that,
He made it a blessing.
When people go see The Nutcracker...
... then they see her child and see her eyes glowing...
... when the world becomes magical at night,
They will know if the music is made by Tchaikovsky...
... enriched by the bipolar,
And don't think it's just a disease.
When I see the river,
It is a symbol of two things that come together.
That can be the end of the trip, or two people.
Anything else?
You will get more if you want more.
It's a house.
Yes, Luna, I just predicted Emily.
Come on, I want to hear your prophecy. / Put it together.
Sit down. / What?
He wants to read your cards.
He gets a month.
Do you get a month?
That's interesting.
He gets two rivers that meet.
Why is that interesting?
Do you know if we make mostly water?
And the moon draws water.
Actually the sun does it. I only reflected it.
But at sunset, million see the moon.
That is the light.
That's right, but it's only rays from the sun...
... which is about the moon, glows back.
Can't sleep anymore?
No.
That's weird.
The time is the same as last night.
It must have something to do with the moon.
Why are you calling yourself Luna?
Because madness looks at the moon and wonders...
... how is he stuck here.
Where are you from?
Yes, I know you are from the moon, what about your parents?
My father is from here.
My mother is the same as where I come from.
He often wakes me up at midnight...
... and ask me out to look at stars.
Imagine jumping from star to star.
And your father?
He is like most other fathers.
They do not like to see his daughter has difficulties.
So...
I don't often meet him.
I think... I think I make him sad.
We are not from here. You and me.
It feels like that.
How are you stuck here?
That is embarrassing.
I'll tell you, if you tell me. / Well, you tell me first.
OK.
You force open your eyes then look at the sun.
What is the trigger?
Do you know?
We are both very tired. I feel that way.
There is no way we can discuss all this night.
You should stay here, and tomorrow morning,
We will discuss all of these in detail.
Sign here and register yourself in,
Then we will examine thoroughly your case...
... early in the morning.
You accidentally signed in yourself to a mental hospital?
Only for one night./No.
For overnight.
That's not funny. / That's ridiculous.
OK.
Now your turn.
I climb to the top of the building.
I look at the moon...
... ask him to take me home.
Then suddenly...
I feel the rays that illuminate my face.
And I thought, "Gosh."
"This works."
"I will be able to go home."
Then...
Do you know?
Maybe...
Maybe you're right.
I mean, maybe we are aliens.
You too?
Maybe.
A crazy mind aligns with the time of the month.
The more the moon draws a wave, the more it lifts our minds,
And the more sunlight shines on the moon,
We become more manic.
This is a normal brain, it only lights up in several places.
But this, this is a manic brain, full of light.
That's what you call lighting.
That's wise men.
I know.
Apostles, when they are manic, that's when...
... they almost reach full lighting.
And that's just before their died
That's 13th hour. That's what you are talking about. True,
That's what I said. / That's lighting.
Look at this pyramid. Everything is facing the sky.
This is a complex cosmic mapping, leads out.
Everything has to do with by running away...
... to get out of the body, this meat...
They find certain stones, metals, which absorb energy.
And the metal that absorbs the sky...
... reach from the end of the pyramid to the sun,
Invites incoming light.
Yes, correct, enter it.
Silver equipment... / Yes, we need a transmitter.
This is for the antenna? / Yes.
That will reach out.
That won't work. / What can we use?
Use this.
Paste it there.
I don't know if this object is strong enough.
There are four sides to each pyramid.
This is a view of the third pyramid.
The three pyramids, 4 sides each. / Means 12 sides.
12 months./2012.
12 hours. 12 apostles.
Dr. Strinsky doesn't want you both to go out at night.
So...
Can I ask something to help me sleep?
There is no reaction.
You know, the more they are down to earth, the better they sleep.
OK. Then don't wait.
OK, no. / I'll scratch the ./Yes.
What if our soul gets lost?
Will not.
We must keep each other stay oriented.
What if we get lost?
If we are both lost, then we return to our bodies.
Well, we go back to our bodies, and we remember this.
We remember this map. Understand?
Then we remember this in this book.
And that is on this page, understand?
And that will be here, right at the right corner. Understand?
Are you ready?
Yes.
The guards tell me you often stay up together...
... even after I ordered not to be done.
The first report says you guys are awake until 4 in the morning.
And the report recently said you don't sleep at all.
So, we will move you, Marco, to a different ward.
Why? / Because you have bad influence...
But why? / No, that's not true.
Is that true if you two think not from this planet?
Because we are not from this planet.
OK, sit down. In your opinion, where are you from?
Can people from your planet do this?
Marco, sit down.
You know, you can't separate... / People from your planet do that?
That's not fair.
Can they do it? / Fuck you!
Don't approach him. No!
Marco! Marco! / Fuck you! / No, Marco! No!
No! No!
Release! You bastard!
Hold him up...
No!
Let us go home!
Please let us go home!
We just want to go home.
Why is he so calm?
He is with a female patient,
And they make each other bead.
We separate them and they become more manic.
How long will it be?
This is not just treatment.
Because mania is so out of control and he gets taller,
He will slowly experience depression.
That will be severe.
It will take about 6 months.
We can keep it here, but the hospital can't do that.
I suggest he stay with you for a moment.
Winter
Get up. Daddy makes you dinner.
Already showering?
Want to take a shower?
Yes.
Didn't you just take a bath about 4 hours ago?
This is the same.
Have you been in the bath for 4 hours?
That calms me down.
Daddy doesn't see you there.
How are you doing?
Same.
Meet me on the other side.
What if we get lost?
If we get lost, then we return to our bodies.
We return to our bodies, then we remember this.
We remember this map, understand?
Hey, I have another joke. I have another joke.
Spring
I've been a patient here, in the fall.
There are female patients who are on my ward.
I don't have contact information.
We can't give patient information,
For reasons of confidentiality.
What is Dr. Is there Strinsky?
Hey, Carla.
Hey.
Look, I know this hospital policy...
... not to give patient information,
But if you don't separate us,
We will exchange information.
Sorry, but whatever happens, is beyond our control.
Can you at least tell me if he comes looking for me?
No, he didn't come.
Marco.
I told you, I won't give him information.
OK. Can you give this to him, if he comes?
Let me see.
Sorry. I can't give this to him.
But it's not personal information.
It does not violate hospital policy.
This is not a matter of policy, Marco.
You two make each other when you are together in the hospital.
My professional opinion...
... if you are not supposed to be .
Please sit down. I will tell Dr. Strinsky if you come back.
MEET ME IN MOMA BEFORE "STARRY NIGHT" I WILL BE THERE EVERY WEEK 3 HOURS DAY 3 What do you think...
... see it up close?
I think that...
That's amazing.
What do you think?
I think that's good.
You don't like it, right?
I think I'm just...
That's not...
Do you remember what it looks like when we're in the hospital?
You just recovered from depression.
You don't have a physical relationship long enough.
That is understandable. / This is not just a matter of that.
I don't feel the feeling that I should feel for him.
You don't have a desire when you experience manic.
You must learn to live in the range of normal emotions.
This is not normal range.
I don't feel anything.
You've been experiencing extreme feelings so long,
You can't know what it's like to be normal.
You will need time to study.
Alright...
Mother contacted you. Why didn't you answer?
Sorry... / Mom is still uncomfortable you live alone.
So that might be a little makes me worry.
Mother... - Are you...
What if I meet you tomorrow?
You won't tell you to come in?
I'm just... I'm...
You know how... / Come on, honey, let Mom in...
... or you can't sleep tonight.
Mother...
Halo./Halo.
Who is that?
Enter it.
Marco, this is my mother.
Halo./Halo./ Mother, this is Marco.
Wow. / Hey. / Nice to meet you. / Nice to meet you.
We only read Touched with Fire.
This is a good book. You know? / No.
Really? Carla never tell me about that?
No. How did you meet?
He is a poet.
I'm hungry.
Do you want to go for food?
With pleasure. / Good.
I'm not too hungry.
At least just join to chat. You don't have to eat.
If there is something, you may say it.
Do you like spicy food?
I don't know. Maybe.
I know the place is very... / You know, I'm tired.
Really? Why are you feeling tired?
I will stay here.
Good. Maybe we can buy you something and bring it home.
No, I will return another time if you are tired.
Are you ashamed of me?
What? / Are you ashamed of me?
No. What are you talking about? / Why don't you tell him?
I don't know.
I guess I'm just afraid they separate us.
They can't separate us.
We must tell them.
OK.
So, I'm just...
I want to clarify it, if you don't mind.
My wife, Sara, has told me I am the latest news...
... from the background of this situation.
You met Carla at the hospital? / That's right.
We met in group therapy.
They... We have to do group therapy every day.
That's good because you can relate to around.
Yes, that's right.
But, right...
That's right before you both become manic.
When you have this disease, you...
... actually manic before goes to the hospital, Dad.
Of course. It is true.
Sorry. No, I mean... But after you meet,
How to say it...
You are getting more manic. / More ./ That has increased,
We share the nature of each other if that is what you mean.
So you... / I think the way to say it is...
You admit if each other gives a disease, right?
No, I say if our nature feels so deep...
... than what is considered normal.
And not... That's not what it really is...
I understand, it's kind of abnormal.
I understand it's a disease...
I think we don't discuss meaning, if I may speak,
Whether it's a disease, nature or something else.
I think the core and our reason here is,
Ie you both have that,
And I think we're just worried...
... if you influence each other badly _ each other. That is all.
But because both of us experience that,
We are the only people who can relate to each other.
That's beautiful.
I understand that.
Sorry, do you understand that?
Doctor... Remember what the doctor said to us?
I mean, think about it,
If they register on online dating sites,
Then they write "mentally ill",
That won't attract many people to say,
"That is my soulmate", right?
Maybe this is their chance to have a real relationship.
And if you still take the medicine,
Honestly, I have no problem with it.
But that's the whole problem, right?
Mother, can you listen to him?
We will not take medicine. Mother, just listen...
OK, as I thought.
What are you talking about? / You know what I'm talking about.
Marco, listen. You know that will take time...
... until you find the right dose, right?
Even doctors say...
... if in the end you will feel...
... wide range from normal feelings.
How can he know? He doesn't take the medicine.
Doctors don't take the medicine, and you know that. / So...
... that's why I can't believe it.
I don't think it's a bad thing...
... to feel life with the deepest feelings.
I don't think that's a problem.
That is a disease. / Maybe for you,
Because you might have low feeling capacity,
So for you, it makes you feel sick.
No, I don't... Wait a minute.
I don't have a low feeling capacity ./This is not an allusion.
I feel fine. / Sorry, I understand.
Ma'am, you don't need to be angry. / My question is...
How do you dare say that?
Well, for example, if you... / He just talks.
How many hours a week do you spend with your husband?
Yes, God. / This really won't...
This is not about us anymore.
As many couples marry... / Let me answer it.
All right. We spend a lot of time in a week together.
I want to spend every moment awake with your daughter.
So you mean, that madness is love,
If you have to be crazy to fall in love? What do you mean?
That's not what I mean. You don't understand, Dad.
I understand more from you.
And if you think if there is romance by going crazy,
You are already crazy.
No, if you understand, then you won't leave.
Your mother, she left because she was sick.
He left because you thought he was sick,
Because he got wild.
And you're a weak person,
And you want to make it weak, Dad.
So where is the love now? / Father.
No, really, where is that?
When was the last time you heard from your mother?
Excuse me. / Yes, God.
You don't listen to him. He's wrong. You know that.
This is not a blessing. This is a disease.
This must be handled.
I have tried hard for you, honey.
You have to trust me now because sometimes your illness...
... makes you not think clearly. But you have to trust Mother.
Carla, please don't... / Don't be angry, come on.
Summer
"We wake up from sleep and leave the sanity on the side of the bed,"
"Releasing the influence of sedatives..."
"... release the eyelid line which protects the lens..."
"... and let all the miracles contradict ready to survive,"
"Through broken glass."
"God, give us a view..."
"... and all that causes blindness."
What is that?
"A child who grows from our flaming seeds,"
"which burns all lines lifelong descent,"
Until finally meet.
"And find the face for the first time..."
"... in the reflection between the _ of our eyes that meet."
"And in their vision, in flashes of sudden recognition..."
"... from our place at Grand Design,"
"Our child will be left towards the gate of creation."
"Touched with both fires,"
"Until it burns twice higher than you and me."
Hey, Marco, let's give this book to our child...
... so that when he starts to know who he is,
He will know the beauty in it.
Hello!
Hey, how are you? Joe!
OK, thank you.
Is Marco there? I'm his father.
No. I haven't seen it for a week.
A week? / Yes.
OK.
I will see what he wants.
Hey, ma'am.
Actually, we are busy.
Really? Because you just want...
I want to meet with you and Marco...
... and hear what have you two done.
Only to fix problems.
I don't know, ma'am... / Honey, Mother really...
I really want our relationship to be able to walk. Really>
I don't want to be unable to meet with you because of this problem.
I don't want to lose you for ridiculous reasons.
So it is with me.
Hi, Marco./Halo.
How are you doing? Hi, Marco.
Good, how are you doing?
Hi, Marco./Halo.
How are you? / Are you hungry?
We are there... / You forgot to close the door.
I intentionally did it. That is not important.
Yes. Wait a minute.
What are you... What is he doing here?
We invited him. / What are you doing here?
Why? You don't... / We love you,
And we want the best for you. / What happened?
I brought several people. / No.
No! Stop it!
No, he can't enter here. / Calm down.
No! / It's okay. Stop it!
He can't enter here!
Marco, calm down, okay?
You endanger yourself and others.
You need help, understand?
You don't take your medicine and you become a bead.
You need help. / No! Certainly not!
Daddy, you cheated me!
You can't do that.
Your family loves you... / Father, I will never forgive you.
I will never...
You led me to the river. / I'm sorry.
... love you very much. Inhale, Marco.
Okay, no, you're right.
It's okay. Understand?
Hey. We will go, understand?
Hey, honey. / This is really okay.
This will be fine. / Don't touch me.
No, no, Carla./ Well, honey, you understand.
No! No!
No, no!
Bastard!
We have to go far.
If they find us,
They will stop us to have children.
They don't want us to have children.
I understand.
Can you tell me if I hear something?
Thank you very much. I'm really worried.
Next here.
We have to go to the forest so they can't find us.
We can raise children there.
He won't grow up with through what we go through.
He will be free to live life as he wants.
Here is the place.
Here we will raise our children.
Everything that surrounds it is just a forest.
Damn.
What should we do?
I will lead to the river. / What?
We will get Nature's help.
I've held you.
First of all, I want to say if we are very lucky...
... can know this earlier.
That really is good news for today.
Carla is pregnant.
And I want everything here know if I'm alone...
... and the staff at the hospital are ready to do...
... all that allows to help Carla and Marco...
... in their transition to the outside world.
Wow, I really want to be happy about this,
But sorry, I can't. I can not.
We promise if both of us will take our medicine.
We are both responsible for the problem.
My daughter means a lot to me.
I will help you get a job.
Thank you.
Autumn
You have a job interview tomorrow, right? / Yes.
I've thought about that.
Do you know what I think is better?
Maybe I can invite dogs to walk.
I will be out there, I will work, you know?
Then at the same time, combines everything,
Sounds, trees,
Buildings, everything,
Like absorbing all that, then then,
Channel it all into my , you know?
We already told our parents...
... if we will try to support ourselves with...
Exactly. That's why I thought about things to do.
I don't know how much you will be paid.
While this baby will need diapers, blankets...
... food, supplies, school...
... baby carriages and apartment rentals, then, you know,
Gathering at a birthday party... / Alright.
I mean, it will only... / Alright...
You know? / I know. You are right.
He really looks so adorable.
It feels like you want to eat it.
He is like...
Hey, look.
That's good.
Hey, what do you think if we paint...
... the big Starry Night mural, all over this wall?
I like that. That's a good idea. Yes.
Then we can fill the ceiling...
... with stars that shine in the dark, you know?
Yes. / Like a sticker.
And maybe we can hang there baby monitor.
Right. And you know what we can do?
We can make constellations.
Then we can make our own constellations stars.
We can change it...
Then imagine the three of us gathered together...
... publish a big book...
... with illustrations of all different constellations.
What's wrong?
Nothing. - You don't look...
You don't look so excited. / No, I'm very excited.
I...
Do you know what I'm thinking?
I think we can put bookshelves here.
Then then we might...
Wait! That's perfect! ... rocking chairs there, right?
No, that's perfect. / Isn't that perfect?
For a moment, I'll take it.
I like that. I remember something.
Look. Look...
Remember?
Yes. / Then...
Bible.
Marco. Marco./What?
Have you taken your medicine?
No.
I can't drink it.
We decide if we won't...
I know. That's right. / ... do everything,
Acting carelessly because I am pregnant.
That doesn't mean we have to take medication.
I can make it back to take medicine.
No, you can't.
I can.
That must be.
Carla, you can't.
If he doesn't understand after almost killing both of you on the river,
He won't realize that.
Then what is your suggestion?
According to you you should not stay with her.
What do you say? If I should not give birth to this child if...
Mother just wants to be really clear. Understand?
You want to raise a child with a manic psychotic parent.
Touched with Fire
Hi.
I'm Carla./Hai. Kay Jamison.
Nice to meet you./ How are you? Marco.
Nice to meet you./ It's an honor to meet you.
Thank you.
This is amazing. I have to tell you,
Your book means so much to us,
And that really helped us through many things, both Carla and myself.
I feel happy. thanks. Thank you.
OK, so May 1 is date of delivery,
And we know there are certain sacrifices that must be done...
... with, you know, who...
Yes. What you mean is in taking medicine,
Inter must or not must take medicine,
Or are you going to take medicine.
My biggest concern is to give birth to a child,
Bringing to this world,
Welcoming this new life...
... and it's kind of being...
... being two people...
... more boring than before, or...
The first time I was treated, and the first time I was treated...
... it's been very long.
Lithium is still difficult to obtain.
I keep getting high doses because that's what people did at that time,
And somehow I feel die, and I reject it.
But I still use lithium,
And I don't feel inhibited in any case.
I just don't know how I can make...
How will my creativities be affected.
You are afraid of losing art and losing your desire.
Treatment will not eliminate your personality.
That won't eliminate your own talent.
It lights up when it's out of control.
And what is being treated is to calm it a little...
... without losing that talent.
It takes time so that the atmosphere my heart can run normally.
I feel much happier.
I'm more productive.
I can better rely on myself to produce and write.
In every aspect of my life has become a gift.
I think he is very impressive. So good, right?
He is weak.
He has no power, so he gives up.
What? / You can see that in him.
He is like...
He hopes that if he can have...
... what the artists have until he writes it down.
But he doesn't have courage. That is why he wrote it.
What do you think Poe, Byron, Tchaikovsky,
Melville, Hemingway, will step back...
... and turn away from storms like he did?
No. They conquered it.
They conquer it, but he doesn't.
That's the reason he wrote it,
Because he wants to be like them in his imagination, but he can't.
I like what I said,
How can we feel full feeling even more than...
I don't want a full feeling!
Then what do you want? / I want mania!
Do you want mania?
That's so crazy. / Why?
Because something is said doctor to you...
... or something your parents say to you?
Because you are not willing make sacrifices.
You say you want family. You said you want love.
But you don't want to give up anything for that.
We will teach this child with that.
This is a blessing, Carla./ No, this is not a blessing.
And you... / ***!
What is this?
All this about poetry, about its beauty?
Is that just nonsense?
Let's just throw it away, Carla.
Don't. Please, don't./ Cancer base.
Yes. Just torn.
Stop it. Why do we want to spread our child with this?
This. Take it, Carla! / Don't!
Carla, I'm sorry.
Carla, I'm really sorry.
Carla?
Damn.
Hello?
I tried contacting you all day.
I don't mean to encourage you like that.
I never meant to hurt you.
I'm really sorry.
I beg you.
I drink?
Marco...
Hey... / Surprise...
Hey, honey.
What's wrong?
Hey, come here. Surprise./ What happened?
I want to hold a baby shower surprise.
I contact our parents,
And I think we should give a surprise baby bath.
You actually said this important meeting,
I know. / That's why we rush to come here.
I want this to be a surprise for all of us.
No, it's okay. Nice to see you.
Hi, honey. Are you okay?
Yes. All is well. / All right.
Hi./ Hey. / Nice to see you.
Hey, you know, before us... Wait a minute...
This is for you. Come on ./ No, thank you.
Before us... Marco./ This is for you.
Marco, can I talk to you? / Of course...
You mind if we... / Please, no, it's okay.
No, I mean, now. Can we talk now?
Yes, wait for the truth, okay?
Let me open this.
I will open the bottle.
Be careful with that.
OK.
Sorry. Everything is fine.
This is for you. / Just a little. Is it enough. / Are you sure?
Just a little./Marco./What ?/ What happened?
What? - Are you okay? / Everything is fine.
This.
Do you want to? / You know,
You should not drink because you are pregnant.
I think drinking just a little doesn't matter. Correct?
I will pour it for you, then when I finish toast...
... you can decide.
Sorry. I forget something.
This. I bought you a present.
Thank you.
Open...
Carla and I are looking for children's books...
... and I thought of this book a few days ago,
And that seems to me very perfect, you know?
When we are at home hurt together,
When we first met...
We imagine if we were from another planet...
... because our place is not on this Earth.
And we pretend if a day we will come back...
... to our planet actually, our home.
And in this book...
Little Prince comes from another planet, but he visits Earth.
Then in the end he wants back to his house,
But the only way for him to do the , he must die on Earth.
So, we toast...
... for babies who will feel the place is here, on Earth,
On this planet,
And don't have to die to be able to go home.
Carla, I just toast.
Carla./No.
We toast. Lift your glass.
I...
Why don't you drink, Carla?
Are you still pretending, after all these things, if you can't drink?
Because I know.
Why don't you say it? / OK.
Just say it. Say it, just say it.
Carla has an abortion. Surprise.
Right?
So why don't you say , Carla?
Please say, please. / Well, I did it.
Yes, God.
Why did you do that?
Do you forget everything?
No.
I don't forget anything.
I think you know if that is our miracle,
If it is a blessing we are from God.
I think you know that!
I think you know if... / I know. I know!
... that is a blessing from God! Then why change it?
What changes it? / Because! Because of what?
Because I don't want the child to be big with our disease!
So we are a mistake?
Are we a mistake?
Are we a mistake, Carla? Are we a mistake?
That's all.
Hello?
What?
A Year Later
"When the sun and moon are parallel in the sky,"
"They give each other light."
"And the closer they are move each other,"
"The brighter their light,"
"And the higher the fire that grows within us."
"When we race through day at that time,"
"Every footstep that we take..."
"... burn pieces on earth throughout the beauty of life..."
"... in a short time touches our feet,"
"Just leave the ashes under us."
"Until we don't have a foothold to stand and where to go."
"And now we've turned away from our fire..."
"... to deal with a day of burning that is left by fire,"
"And learn to look at it..."
"... through wise eyes, day after day."
"We can look behind our book with a clear view..."
"... and give him an _ end that we never wrote."
"While I know it's too late to take a torn page,"
"I will admit, I still think of our little prince."
"And sometimes I go out and look at the sky..." "... then thought he went to the planet which after he died."
"Then I imagine the three of us..."
"... stay there as out in another life."
"But now, you have your life yourself, I have my own life."
"And we have to live it like should be..."
"... if we can go back to the day we contain our child..."
"... and can see if our eyes bead can't see that moment."
"When the sun and the moon finally are as close as possible..."
"... and the fire inside us increases to the highest peak,"
"It jumps over the ashes which fades from our flesh..."
"... to burn our love into eternity,"
"Through our baby."
"That's eternal fire..."
"... which can light up rather than bead we have ever experienced..."
"... on the brightest days of mania,"
"But that will also sustain."
I'm very proud of you./ Thank you.
Maybe you can stop by later?
Hi.
Hey.
I think it works very well. Yes.
That's a very good idea. / Yes.
So how are you doing?
Good. How about you?
Good.
Yes, very good.
What is he?
Yes.
He looks like a reliable person.
That's right.
I should go.
Hey, Marco.
Nice to see you again.
You too.
This film is dedicated to artists listed in Kay Jamison's book
ObezSubs
Once upon a time...
When the wave will be good and the wind will blow
When the star pulsates fire circles in the sky
And everyone sees, and everyone crazy knows
That is the second eye of God who is united in the sky
To give us glance of majesty
Although wise people might argue
We stare through the eyes of God
And states that only syndromes that are not shot
Flash through cracks in our minds
We all know it's true
We all know we share the sights
In something so beautiful to prove
And they can't keep away from me and you
Even when the season changes,
Summer that is longer,
The sun crawling away
Then the shadow falls hold your brain
And you can feel your desire in every withered leaf
Stick to trees throughout the forest
Spread around the as if they were falling against you
Then then when Winter arrives,
Your soul will be far away in frozen ground
And that calls your body down
And that feels like your ashes against gravity
Then later, Spring will come back
And invite you to back to high shine
And it's above until you decide
If you will repeat seasonal waves
Which will give waste to your life
But if you choose to live
You might look up at the sky
And commemorate those times
Where the Sun and Moon will unite
And each will be face each other
Until God may cry for what has been lost and why
But I told you for didn't miss those moments
Because the Sun stays shining And the Moon will still shine
And with enough light from a distance of light
From the sun across the sky
That will maintain a great vision for life in your eyes Described by: www.subtitlecinema.com