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Give a speech to the next
viewer,
Wechat: CS1_SOLAIRE99
Whatsapp: +66634622578

7
00:01:11,571 --> 00:01:14,305
My friend, Mr. Kumail Nanjiani.

8
00:01:17,644 --> 00:01:19,544
Hello.

9
00:01:19,546 --> 00:01:22,148
I will tell you
about myself.

10
00:01:22,148 --> 00:01:24,141
I'm big in Pakistan.

11
00:01:24,141 --> 00:01:27,295
People always ask me, what do you feel like?

12
00:01:28,436 --> 00:01:31,556
It's not too different from here.

13
00:01:31,558 --> 00:01:33,046
We play cricket,

14
00:01:33,046 --> 00:01:36,294
And that's a more
cool version of baseball.

15
00:01:36,319 --> 00:01:38,057
And we worship a lot.

16
00:01:38,057 --> 00:01:40,939
Not much.
Only five times a day.

17
00:01:41,301 --> 00:01:44,060
And we marry someone
who is looking for our parents,

18
00:01:44,060 --> 00:01:45,836
Matchmaking, you know?

19
00:01:45,836 --> 00:01:50,176
For me, that might be because we got the
episode "Knight Rider" a little late.

20
00:01:50,176 --> 00:01:54,203
And "a little late I mean,
we only got episode two.

21
00:01:54,454 --> 00:01:57,926
But other than that everything is the same.

22
00:02:31,236 --> 00:02:34,803
Honestly this is my journal
actually.

23
00:02:34,803 --> 00:02:36,904
And this is the woman
who wrote it.

24
00:02:36,904 --> 00:02:38,318
Woman poor.

25
00:02:38,318 --> 00:02:43,052
Yes, he doesn't know if
big breasts will come out...

26
00:02:43,052 --> 00:02:45,895
... and change his life
dramatically.

27
00:02:45,895 --> 00:02:47,291
So, thank you everyone...

28
00:02:47,291 --> 00:02:49,791
There are no bad viewers ,
only bad comedians.

29
00:02:49,791 --> 00:02:51,414
You always complain
audience problems.

30
00:02:51,414 --> 00:02:53,385
Yes, that's when they're
really bad.

31
00:02:53,385 --> 00:02:55,139
Like 90% of their time
is really bad?

32
00:02:55,141 --> 00:02:57,440
Can do you see and give
I note tonight?

33
00:02:57,440 --> 00:02:58,962
If we both give each other
notes, I think that helps.

34
00:02:58,962 --> 00:03:01,034
Your notes only add
the word "bastard."

35
00:03:01,034 --> 00:03:02,802
That doesn't help at all. /
"Bastards" are funny words.

36
00:03:02,802 --> 00:03:05,096
It's soft on the top and hard
at the end. / That's really bad.

37
00:03:05,096 --> 00:03:06,539
That's very bad. /
What's wrong?

38
00:03:06,539 --> 00:03:07,721
Just look. I will see.
I will give you a note.

39
00:03:07,721 --> 00:03:09,232
OK. Thank you.
Hey, that's good.

40
00:03:09,232 --> 00:03:11,396
No, he doesn't even smile.

41
00:03:11,396 --> 00:03:13,461
I thought I would throw up. /
Who?

42
00:03:13,461 --> 00:03:15,193
Bob Dalavan.

43
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:16,458
Who is Bob Dalavan?

44
00:03:16,458 --> 00:03:20,940
Bob Dalavan works for Festival
Montreal Comedy, stupid basis.

45
00:03:20,940 --> 00:03:23,201
He is here? /
Yes. You don't want to be noticed?

46
00:03:23,201 --> 00:03:24,869
You don't want to move to LA? /
Gosh.

47
00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:27,202
Associating with Elijah Wood
and so on?

48
00:03:27,202 --> 00:03:29,491
There are no people on stage? /
No.

49
00:03:31,110 --> 00:03:32,710
He might use cocaine.

50
00:03:32,712 --> 00:03:35,679
Does he use cocaine for entertainment? /
Actual cocaine addicts.

51
00:03:35,704 --> 00:03:37,037
Cocaine addict. /
I think so.

52
00:03:38,418 --> 00:03:40,255
Before I take it out
the next person,

53
00:03:40,255 --> 00:03:44,344
You know tonight is
Tuesday Jell-O-Shot!

54
00:03:45,869 --> 00:03:48,325
And we all know what happened
after eight Jell-O-Shots.

55
00:03:48,325 --> 00:03:51,363
We all urinate in
pants and vomit.

56
00:03:51,363 --> 00:03:53,231
Good, I will present the next comic
.

57
00:03:53,334 --> 00:03:56,077
Confident. Quiet.

58
00:03:56,102 --> 00:03:57,586
Smile.

59
00:03:59,448 --> 00:04:03,024
He is like a serial killer who
finishes inspirational speakers.

60
00:04:03,024 --> 00:04:05,843
He is like Daniel Day-Lewis,
except he is bad.

61
00:04:05,845 --> 00:04:07,478
I've tried warming it up.

62
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:09,126
That doesn't work for me. /
Very uncomfortable.

63
00:04:09,126 --> 00:04:10,730
I just bought
laser printing machine.

64
00:04:10,730 --> 00:04:13,236
It prints six lasers so far.

65
00:04:14,199 --> 00:04:16,287
Dodd, Dalavan is on the bench
tonight's audience.

66
00:04:16,287 --> 00:04:18,111
Can I appear 10 minutes? /
No, 5 minutes.

67
00:04:18,136 --> 00:04:19,590
You pull out the chair,
you appear for 5 minutes.

68
00:04:19,590 --> 00:04:20,919
You know the agreement. /
Come on, friend.

69
00:04:20,919 --> 00:04:22,479
I will duplicate the next one.
Come on.

70
00:04:22,479 --> 00:04:23,643
What will you do
there?

71
00:04:23,643 --> 00:04:25,748
I made a schedule next week. /
Well, good.

72
00:04:26,778 --> 00:04:30,516
I was in bed with my boyfriend and
I tried to explain to him...

73
00:04:30,516 --> 00:04:36,632
... if we were just a small rock
orbiting a star in the galaxy...

74
00:04:36,632 --> 00:04:42,547
... from millions of stars in all
the universe of millions of galaxies.

75
00:04:42,549 --> 00:04:44,286
So I forgot your birthday.

76
00:04:44,286 --> 00:04:45,584
Who cares?

77
00:04:45,584 --> 00:04:48,787
You are too much cosmic
this matter.

78
00:04:48,787 --> 00:04:51,583
Honestly, you are truly selfish.

79
00:04:51,583 --> 00:04:53,512
You're right, you're selfish.

80
00:04:57,187 --> 00:04:58,708
Hey.

81
00:04:59,365 --> 00:05:02,142
Have you ever had an
HIV drug named Cheese?

82
00:05:02,142 --> 00:05:04,592
I saw it on the news,
so I find out what Cheese is,

83
00:05:04,592 --> 00:05:06,201
And what is the Cheese mix.

84
00:05:06,201 --> 00:05:11,082
Cheese is Tylenol PM
and heroin.

85
00:05:12,468 --> 00:05:15,513
So it's actually heroin.

86
00:05:15,513 --> 00:05:18,370
Heroin who does
heavy duty.

87
00:05:18,370 --> 00:05:20,934
Just use heroin.
That is very strong.

88
00:05:20,934 --> 00:05:23,833
You already have heroin.

89
00:05:24,287 --> 00:05:26,505
Are there Pakistanis here?

90
00:05:28,130 --> 00:05:31,185
Seriously? You are not from Pakistan.

91
00:05:31,185 --> 00:05:33,171
I definitely recognize you.

92
00:05:34,724 --> 00:05:36,132
Are you kidding?

93
00:05:36,132 --> 00:05:37,808
He gives you Montreal?

94
00:05:37,808 --> 00:05:39,958
You don't have to do
shows or auditions?

95
00:05:39,958 --> 00:05:41,804
That's almost too easy.

96
00:05:41,804 --> 00:05:44,252
I want trouble.
I want the story...

97
00:05:44,252 --> 00:05:46,844
... which can be told on the show
talk, but there is...

98
00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:49,153
You don't know how difficult it is
not to try hard.

99
00:05:49,153 --> 00:05:51,653
It's a struggle for success
without stopping.

100
00:05:51,653 --> 00:05:53,709
Did he say something about me?

101
00:05:53,709 --> 00:05:55,379
Sure.

102
00:05:56,058 --> 00:05:57,830
What about me? /
He, they, you two.

103
00:05:57,830 --> 00:06:01,123
He said,
"the person appeared."

104
00:06:01,559 --> 00:06:04,766
I really hate you. /
We all hate you.

105
00:06:06,632 --> 00:06:08,223
Hi./
Hi.

106
00:06:08,223 --> 00:06:10,700
Halo./ My name is Kumail./
Yes, we know.

107
00:06:10,700 --> 00:06:12,806
We see you appear.

108
00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:15,476
There is no need for further ado...

109
00:06:15,476 --> 00:06:17,709
I have to tell you if
when you scream at me,

110
00:06:17,709 --> 00:06:19,106
That really makes me
lose focus,

111
00:06:19,106 --> 00:06:21,651
And you shouldn't interrupt comedians.

112
00:06:21,651 --> 00:06:23,353
That's very rough.

113
00:06:23,353 --> 00:06:25,189
I don't interrupt.

114
00:06:25,189 --> 00:06:28,252
I just cheered on you.
That is a form of support.

115
00:06:28,252 --> 00:06:29,913
Well, that's a common misconception.

116
00:06:29,913 --> 00:06:33,244
But shouting something on comedian
is considered to be interrupting.

117
00:06:33,244 --> 00:06:35,240
Interrupting doesn't have to be negative.

118
00:06:35,240 --> 00:06:39,034
So if I scream,
"You're amazing in bed!"

119
00:06:39,034 --> 00:06:41,152
That includes interrupting?

120
00:06:41,152 --> 00:06:44,130
Yes. That really interrupts. /
Good.

121
00:06:45,458 --> 00:06:47,014
See you later.

122
00:06:47,417 --> 00:06:48,994
Don't leave. No, you can... I leave.

123
00:06:48,994 --> 00:06:51,571
You made my friend scared.

124
00:06:51,571 --> 00:06:54,486
What is your name? /
Emily.

125
00:06:54,486 --> 00:06:58,967
Emily. This. I want to show you something, Emily.

126
00:07:02,310 --> 00:07:06,023
This is your name in
Urdu.

127
00:07:10,393 --> 00:07:12,422
Does this seduction work?

128
00:07:12,422 --> 00:07:14,425
I have had a small success with it.

129
00:07:14,425 --> 00:07:16,065
Bullshit.

130
00:07:16,840 --> 00:07:20,132
Do you like to come to comedy shows with your friends?

131
00:07:20,132 --> 00:07:24,148
Yes. We are all
graduate students at the University of Chicago.

132
00:07:24,173 --> 00:07:27,099
What did you study at graduate school? /
I studied psychology.

133
00:07:27,099 --> 00:07:28,284
I will become a therapist.

134
00:07:28,284 --> 00:07:31,005
So you will sit on the sofa and
ask people...

135
00:07:31,030 --> 00:07:32,189
... "How does it affect
on your feelings?"

136
00:07:32,189 --> 00:07:33,721
In the end, yes.

137
00:07:33,721 --> 00:07:35,601
Right now I'm only doing
field assignments...

138
00:07:35,601 --> 00:07:38,543
... with a group of people
who are convicted of domestic violence.

139
00:07:38,543 --> 00:07:40,048
Gosh ./
Cheers for that.

140
00:07:40,048 --> 00:07:43,654
Wow. No, don't toast to that.
For you to be a therapist.

141
00:07:43,654 --> 00:07:46,126
Good. To get my
master's degree.

142
00:07:46,126 --> 00:07:48,293
We will start from there then
we see the rest.

143
00:07:52,971 --> 00:07:55,496
My housemate, Chris,
might sleep on the couch.

144
00:07:55,496 --> 00:07:57,544
He will try to start
conversation.

145
00:07:57,544 --> 00:08:00,608
Ignore it. /
Alright.

146
00:08:00,608 --> 00:08:02,187
Come on.

147
00:08:03,785 --> 00:08:06,089
Hey, friend.
Hey.

148
00:08:06,114 --> 00:08:07,719
Hi.

149
00:08:14,311 --> 00:08:17,546
Good for him.

150
00:08:21,518 --> 00:08:24,603
Do you want to watch a movie? /
Of course.

151
00:08:25,662 --> 00:08:28,488
Should I put my things
on the floor or...

152
00:08:28,488 --> 00:08:30,256
Yes, I think it's safe.
Do you know?

153
00:08:30,256 --> 00:08:33,062
That area... Put it there.

154
00:08:33,064 --> 00:08:36,298
I cleaned it up earlier this year, so...

155
00:08:36,300 --> 00:08:39,602
Should I take off the shoes
or can I wear shoes on the mattress?

156
00:08:39,604 --> 00:08:41,437
No, take off the shoes on the mattress.

157
00:08:41,439 --> 00:08:44,206
I have strict rules. /
Good.

158
00:08:45,084 --> 00:08:50,299
That's really a air mattress.

159
00:08:50,299 --> 00:08:53,482
Do you think it will be flat
on the air mattress?

160
00:08:53,484 --> 00:08:57,586
I don't think it's a real mattress,
but you know.

161
00:08:57,588 --> 00:09:00,852
The mattress is a real mattress.

162
00:09:00,877 --> 00:09:02,497
You're too fanatical... /
Alright.

163
00:09:02,522 --> 00:09:04,664
... against air-based...

164
00:09:04,689 --> 00:09:06,886
Against air-based mattresses? /
Comfort objects.

165
00:09:07,820 --> 00:09:09,231
"Night of the Living Dead"?

166
00:09:09,233 --> 00:09:11,536
Of course, I have never watched the film.

167
00:09:11,561 --> 00:09:15,137
Well, basically, the corpses start to rise.

168
00:09:15,139 --> 00:09:17,253
And good people...

169
00:09:28,029 --> 00:09:29,752
SMS Lauren.

170
00:09:29,754 --> 00:09:32,688
"Are you awake, friend?"

171
00:09:32,690 --> 00:09:34,772
No, damn it.

172
00:09:35,510 --> 00:09:38,372
What do you want to say
to Orien?

173
00:09:40,011 --> 00:09:41,397
What you want
say to...

174
00:09:41,399 --> 00:09:45,701
"You're awake, period."
Send.

175
00:09:46,036 --> 00:09:48,945
That might be beyond my ability
right now.

176
00:09:48,970 --> 00:09:50,263
No.

177
00:09:56,379 --> 00:09:58,883
What is this scar?

178
00:09:59,816 --> 00:10:03,719
It's smallpox vaccination.

179
00:10:03,721 --> 00:10:05,853
I think only
parents get it.

180
00:10:05,853 --> 00:10:07,123
I'm from Pakistan,

181
00:10:07,125 --> 00:10:10,740
And we are still fighting battles
that you have won.

182
00:10:10,765 --> 00:10:12,630
Are you still in high school?

183
00:10:12,630 --> 00:10:14,381
Are you really funny at that time?

184
00:10:14,381 --> 00:10:16,866
Are you very smart at that time?
Are you...

185
00:10:16,868 --> 00:10:19,301
I'm very shy.

186
00:10:19,303 --> 00:10:21,437
They call me Chashmullee.

187
00:10:21,439 --> 00:10:23,139
What is that?

188
00:10:23,141 --> 00:10:25,708
The rough translation of "loser."

189
00:10:25,710 --> 00:10:27,987
I will show you a photo.

190
00:10:28,012 --> 00:10:31,132
When were you high school?
Gosh.

191
00:10:31,157 --> 00:10:32,547
No.

192
00:10:32,572 --> 00:10:34,617
And I thought to
kill him now.

193
00:10:34,619 --> 00:10:37,153
What inspired the hair style? / Hugh Grant.

194
00:10:37,155 --> 00:10:38,497
No./
Yes.

195
00:10:38,497 --> 00:10:42,187
No. And I'm very serious. /
I'm a big fan.

196
00:10:42,212 --> 00:10:44,393
I read in the
interview with Hugh Grant...

197
00:10:44,395 --> 00:10:47,296
... he said he didn't smile. /
That's not true.

198
00:10:47,298 --> 00:10:49,263
Because it makes it look
fat, so I'm not...

199
00:10:49,263 --> 00:10:51,867
I'm not smiling at photos
for years.

200
00:10:51,869 --> 00:10:54,577
What are you like in high school?

201
00:10:55,354 --> 00:10:58,942
Are you selected as the Sexiest Girl?

202
00:10:58,942 --> 00:11:02,154
No. I was chosen as the atikan The Most Unnoticed Girl.

203
00:11:02,154 --> 00:11:05,444
That's good. /
That isn't very good.

204
00:11:05,469 --> 00:11:08,851
I have acne, gothic style, and...

205
00:11:08,853 --> 00:11:11,654
... I have curly hair.

206
00:11:11,656 --> 00:11:15,033
Children call me Beetlejuice.

207
00:11:15,058 --> 00:11:16,906
Somehow.

208
00:11:16,931 --> 00:11:19,102
Actually, I know why.

209
00:11:19,102 --> 00:11:21,510
That's because they think
I look like Beetlejuice.

210
00:11:21,510 --> 00:11:23,681
I think this subject is enough.

211
00:11:23,681 --> 00:11:26,247
In fact, I think I'll go home. /
Wait.

212
00:11:26,247 --> 00:11:27,989
We haven't even made love yet.

213
00:11:27,989 --> 00:11:29,642
I'm not a woman like that.

214
00:11:29,642 --> 00:11:31,377
I only make love once
on the first date.

215
00:11:31,377 --> 00:11:32,760
Wow./
Plus masturbating.

216
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:35,066
Well, I haven't got it, so...

217
00:11:35,091 --> 00:11:37,705
You didn't get that because
you insulted me.

218
00:11:37,705 --> 00:11:39,253
What's wrong?
What are you doing?

219
00:11:39,253 --> 00:11:40,634
I wear
clothes in this blanket.

220
00:11:40,634 --> 00:11:42,134
I've seen everything.

221
00:11:42,159 --> 00:11:44,353
Do you remember?
We just made love.

222
00:11:44,355 --> 00:11:48,891
Yes, but we were being
very passionate and...

223
00:11:48,893 --> 00:11:51,145
Look, I'm very
having fun.

224
00:11:51,145 --> 00:11:52,339
Thank you very much.

225
00:11:52,339 --> 00:11:58,092
I will call Uber,
go home, and I hope...

226
00:11:59,637 --> 00:12:01,667
Enough...

227
00:12:02,772 --> 00:12:06,112
Your driver will be ready after
he wears his pants.

228
00:12:06,623 --> 00:12:09,280
Are you willing to give
a ride while we make love?

229
00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:11,413
Yes, but I only saw
several times.

230
00:12:12,790 --> 00:12:16,619
So, maybe we meet
in the club sometime...

231
00:12:16,621 --> 00:12:19,672
... and buy drinks?

232
00:12:20,324 --> 00:12:22,321
I'm not...

233
00:12:23,043 --> 00:12:26,003
I know this sounds normal,
but I'm not too...

234
00:12:26,003 --> 00:12:28,204
I don't really want to
date now.

235
00:12:28,204 --> 00:12:32,034
I'm quite busy with college,
work, and...

236
00:12:32,036 --> 00:12:33,750
Yes. /
I'm too much business.

237
00:12:33,750 --> 00:12:36,305
Yes, I understand.

238
00:12:36,307 --> 00:12:40,409
It's perfect, because I'm also
not wanting to date.

239
00:12:40,411 --> 00:12:41,977
OK./
Yes.

240
00:12:41,979 --> 00:12:44,628
I actually have a strict
two day rule...

241
00:12:44,628 --> 00:12:48,917
... where I can't meet
someone for two consecutive days.

242
00:12:48,919 --> 00:12:51,379
So, because we have been together for two days,

243
00:12:51,379 --> 00:12:53,351
Even if I meet you again,
and that won't happen,

244
00:12:53,351 --> 00:12:56,025
Because you're not dating, I don't date,

245
00:12:56,027 --> 00:12:58,064
I won't be able to meet
with you until Monday.

246
00:12:58,089 --> 00:12:59,417
We are not together with
for two days.

247
00:12:59,417 --> 00:13:00,812
We are together for five hours.

248
00:13:00,812 --> 00:13:02,692
Yes, but... /
Just want to clarify.

249
00:13:02,692 --> 00:13:05,934
Yesterday and today because
is past midnight.

250
00:13:05,936 --> 00:13:08,241
So, today is tomorrow,

251
00:13:08,241 --> 00:13:10,553
This dawn is tomorrow,
be two days.

252
00:13:10,553 --> 00:13:12,741
You know, I'm not dating
time bookworm,

253
00:13:12,743 --> 00:13:15,878
So you don't make a choice.

254
00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:19,815
That's good, because I'm a nerd
who really appreciates time.

255
00:13:19,817 --> 00:13:24,486
I know. / I'm very strict
about day and night...

256
00:13:25,359 --> 00:13:28,891
Wait, so that everything is clear, what do we decide?

257
00:13:28,893 --> 00:13:31,448
We decide we will never
meet each other again.

258
00:13:31,448 --> 00:13:33,062
Good.

259
00:13:33,064 --> 00:13:35,350
I'm glad we are
on the same page.

260
00:13:43,180 --> 00:13:44,730
Look at my pants, Kumi.

261
00:13:44,755 --> 00:13:47,562
This is from Citizens Of Humanity.
That's a brand name.

262
00:13:47,562 --> 00:13:49,186
It's very soft.
Touch it.

263
00:13:49,211 --> 00:13:50,942
I don't want to touch your pants. /
Come on, touch it.

264
00:13:50,942 --> 00:13:53,006
It's like sports pants.

265
00:13:53,007 --> 00:13:54,817
You have to be more
like your father.

266
00:13:54,819 --> 00:13:56,729
That's not difficult.
Just observe me.

267
00:13:56,729 --> 00:13:58,574
Follow the father's style. /
Ta.

268
00:13:58,599 --> 00:14:01,166
Kumi, why don't you
grow a beard?

269
00:14:01,166 --> 00:14:02,879
Don't be like Naveed,
is quite a thin beard.

270
00:14:02,879 --> 00:14:05,133
Maybe like my beard,
thin, cool and stylish.

271
00:14:05,133 --> 00:14:09,610
Kumi, mom has thought. Why don't you register for LSAT now?

272
00:14:09,635 --> 00:14:12,401
Sorry, Mom, I still haven't
done it.

273
00:14:12,403 --> 00:14:15,297
I'm glad you said it as if I had never talked about it before.

274
00:14:15,297 --> 00:14:17,740
How is stand-up, Sis?

275
00:14:20,369 --> 00:14:21,788
That's good. thanks.

276
00:14:21,813 --> 00:14:24,233
Since when did you follow
people to talk?

277
00:14:24,258 --> 00:14:26,442
I think the one who should speak
single is Malala.

278
00:14:26,467 --> 00:14:27,816
He has something to say. /
Malala, yes.

279
00:14:27,818 --> 00:14:29,084
I like Malala. /
He has something to say.

280
00:14:29,086 --> 00:14:30,984
Malala./Dia.../Yes.

281
00:14:30,984 --> 00:14:33,161
I know if he goes stand-up,
he will be charming.

282
00:14:33,161 --> 00:14:35,461
There will be a lot of ethnic material,
and I think that's good,

283
00:14:35,461 --> 00:14:38,214
And that's a story that must be played
, but...

284
00:14:38,214 --> 00:14:41,206
You should enter the
"Saturday Night Live." / SNL event.

285
00:14:41,231 --> 00:14:42,827
Good idea. I'll email them.
Somehow I didn't think about that.

286
00:14:42,827 --> 00:14:46,451
You know, dad hacked into an
account Facebook your cousin Rehan.

287
00:14:46,451 --> 00:14:49,592
Daddy hacked him? / Yes, he didn't accept
my friend request,

288
00:14:49,592 --> 00:14:52,321
So dad hacked him and
dad knows if he...

289
00:14:52,321 --> 00:14:55,577
... and white women who live
with him will have children.

290
00:14:55,579 --> 00:14:57,652
Brands are married. /
Yes, whatever.

291
00:14:57,652 --> 00:14:59,672
Then dad hacked his Tumblr
and dad knows...

292
00:14:59,672 --> 00:15:02,484
... if they give the name
their child "Da-v ."

293
00:15:02,486 --> 00:15:04,650
Can you imagine? /
Dave.

294
00:15:04,650 --> 00:15:06,969
Dave? / Dave. /
That might be Dave.

295
00:15:06,994 --> 00:15:08,590
Dave...

296
00:15:08,592 --> 00:15:10,363
There is no one named Da-V . /
That is very sad.

297
00:15:10,363 --> 00:15:11,970
Nobody will
visit that child...

298
00:15:11,995 --> 00:15:14,663
... and the child, remember my words,
will grow up without a family.

299
00:15:14,665 --> 00:15:16,410
As if he is dead
or worse.

300
00:15:16,410 --> 00:15:18,068
That's very sad.

301
00:15:18,093 --> 00:15:21,249
Kumi. Go pray then bring
us ice cream. Go.

302
00:15:21,249 --> 00:15:23,337
What? / Go on, fast.

303
00:15:23,337 --> 00:15:24,766
Hurry up, Dik. Ice cream.

304
00:15:24,766 --> 00:15:26,485
Then we will eat ice cream.

305
00:15:26,485 --> 00:15:27,667
Stop it.

306
00:15:27,667 --> 00:15:30,539
The prayer mat is below. Go on ./
Go. Stop.

307
00:15:31,242 --> 00:15:32,774
What is this?

308
00:15:58,290 --> 00:16:00,340
I don't know, in my opinion... /
My mother used to make the best Kulfi.

309
00:16:00,340 --> 00:16:02,044
Your grandmother. /
Really?

310
00:16:02,046 --> 00:16:03,545
I think ice cream is better
than Kulfi.

311
00:16:03,547 --> 00:16:05,511
Thank you. /
No.

312
00:16:06,187 --> 00:16:08,851
I wonder who it is. /
Yes.

313
00:16:08,853 --> 00:16:11,086
Let me check.
I do not know.

314
00:16:11,088 --> 00:16:13,428
I guess it's a young girl
single Pakistani...

315
00:16:13,453 --> 00:16:15,190
... who visits our house,

316
00:16:15,192 --> 00:16:16,813
Which is at a dead end.

317
00:16:16,838 --> 00:16:18,990
And I also guess if the sentence...

318
00:16:19,015 --> 00:16:21,597
... "stop over" will be said
in the next 10 seconds.

319
00:16:21,599 --> 00:16:23,367
Ten, nine,

320
00:16:23,392 --> 00:16:25,133
Eight, seven,

321
00:16:25,135 --> 00:16:26,768
Shut up. /
Everything...

322
00:16:26,770 --> 00:16:28,533
This is Zubeida.

323
00:16:28,533 --> 00:16:30,539
He just stopped by.
_ Peace.

324
00:16:30,541 --> 00:16:32,007
Greetings also for you.

325
00:16:32,009 --> 00:16:33,999
Come on, sit down.

326
00:16:35,678 --> 00:16:39,565
This is Kumail, your file... /
Thank you.

327
00:16:39,565 --> 00:16:42,217
X-Files is yours, because... /
Thank you.

328
00:16:42,219 --> 00:16:44,696
... it's your favorite event, & apos; right?

329
00:16:45,901 --> 00:16:47,539
Thank you very much.

330
00:16:47,669 --> 00:16:50,067
"The truth is out there."

331
00:16:53,482 --> 00:16:55,368
That's from the event.

332
00:16:56,192 --> 00:16:57,732
Thank you.

333
00:16:58,035 --> 00:16:59,512
Thank you.

334
00:16:59,512 --> 00:17:02,037
Dah./
I hope you come back.

335
00:17:03,095 --> 00:17:06,575
Kumi, there won't be a spark
immediately, understand?

336
00:17:06,577 --> 00:17:09,566
You have to work it out.
You have to stay open.

337
00:17:09,591 --> 00:17:11,542
OK, ma'am. Yes alright. Nice.

338
00:17:11,567 --> 00:17:13,488
I just wish Mom was more
good at it, you know?

339
00:17:13,488 --> 00:17:15,617
I have practiced a lot
and my mom is still...

340
00:17:15,619 --> 00:17:17,812
Mother is not good at that.

341
00:17:17,812 --> 00:17:19,638
Mothers appear maximum with Naveed, but
then with me. / Very funny.

342
00:17:19,638 --> 00:17:21,467
Mother is a little out of the lane.

343
00:17:21,467 --> 00:17:23,389
Again with comedy and comedy.

344
00:17:23,389 --> 00:17:26,061
Every time with comedy.
Try it occasionally seriously.

345
00:17:26,063 --> 00:17:28,130
I'm serious. I want to help my mother better.

346
00:17:38,675 --> 00:17:40,943
Will you allow
me to sit in the front seat?

347
00:17:40,945 --> 00:17:44,079
No, I'm professional and you
pay me for this ride.

348
00:17:44,081 --> 00:17:46,921
I don't want to pay for it.
This is a little suspicious.

349
00:17:48,598 --> 00:17:50,586
Yes. Sorry.

350
00:17:50,588 --> 00:17:52,781
You shouldn't
type the number.

351
00:17:53,252 --> 00:17:57,423
Good, year 1969.

352
00:17:57,448 --> 00:17:59,421
MGM is having
series of failures,

353
00:17:59,421 --> 00:18:03,765
So they use very expensive stars, Vincent Price.

354
00:18:03,767 --> 00:18:05,801
Is this your match test?

355
00:18:05,803 --> 00:18:09,020
Like people do with
"Vonnegut" or "Big Lebowski"?

356
00:18:09,020 --> 00:18:10,891
No, just watch the movie...

357
00:18:10,891 --> 00:18:12,592
... and do it seriously because this is very serious. I will love him.

358
00:18:12,592 --> 00:18:14,843
I like it when men test my taste.

359
00:18:14,845 --> 00:18:16,539
I just want to share
this movie with you,

360
00:18:16,539 --> 00:18:17,941
I don't know why you
like reading...

361
00:18:17,941 --> 00:18:21,805
How many women have you shown this film?

362
00:18:21,805 --> 00:18:23,300
Zero.

363
00:18:23,300 --> 00:18:28,256
How many women do you show
class B horror movies on the third date?

364
00:18:30,226 --> 00:18:33,061
This is not a "B" class horror film

365
00:18:33,063 --> 00:18:34,763
Alright, are you ready?

366
00:18:34,765 --> 00:18:37,399
Close your eyes because when the
menu appears,

367
00:18:37,401 --> 00:18:38,934
There are a few leaks there.

368
00:18:38,936 --> 00:18:40,500
OK? /
I'm ready.

369
00:18:40,500 --> 00:18:42,114
OK, I'll press "play."

370
00:18:42,718 --> 00:18:44,145
OK, press it.

371
00:18:58,321 --> 00:19:00,088
Watch.

372
00:19:00,090 --> 00:19:02,090
I'm watching.

373
00:19:02,092 --> 00:19:04,092
Watch this section.

374
00:19:05,962 --> 00:19:07,677
No./
What?

375
00:19:07,677 --> 00:19:10,116
If you are tired, we can watch later. /
Sorry.

376
00:19:10,141 --> 00:19:13,545
It's just that it's weird
if you yawn...

377
00:19:13,570 --> 00:19:16,066
... while watching
very boring films.

378
00:19:16,803 --> 00:19:19,721
It's not boring.
Wait for the conflict.

379
00:19:19,721 --> 00:19:21,500
The flow starts soon ./
Okay.

380
00:19:21,620 --> 00:19:26,642
Defeat you.
Nine multiplied by nine.

381
00:19:26,667 --> 00:19:28,917
Nine times kill you.

382
00:19:29,147 --> 00:19:30,367
That's fun.

383
00:19:30,367 --> 00:19:33,729
Thank you for sending home,
but we have to stop doing this.

384
00:19:33,729 --> 00:19:36,869
Yes. I know I said that before, but I'm serious.

385
00:19:36,869 --> 00:19:38,760
I can't do this now.

386
00:19:38,762 --> 00:19:42,393
I know. Really. 100%.

387
00:19:42,418 --> 00:19:44,266
I agree with you.

388
00:19:44,268 --> 00:19:46,579
So don't call me again. /
Will not.

389
00:19:46,604 --> 00:19:48,270
I promise.

390
00:19:48,272 --> 00:19:50,338
Good luck with
all your efforts going forward.

391
00:19:50,340 --> 00:19:52,040
Yes, thank you.

392
00:19:52,042 --> 00:19:56,956
Can we embrace awkwardly
before separating forever?

393
00:19:56,981 --> 00:19:59,063
Alright./
Good.

394
00:20:06,140 --> 00:20:07,605
Dah./
Dah.

395
00:20:22,162 --> 00:20:25,098
You promise never to
contact me again, so...

396
00:20:25,883 --> 00:20:29,177
It's very cold outside.

397
00:20:29,202 --> 00:20:30,709
It's really cold.

398
00:20:30,734 --> 00:20:32,618
You make a good core.

399
00:20:32,618 --> 00:20:34,281
This is much warmer here.

400
00:20:34,281 --> 00:20:36,298
That's right.

401
00:20:36,298 --> 00:20:39,312
You know, above is very good. /
Really?

402
00:20:44,328 --> 00:20:46,583
What are you doing?
OK.

403
00:20:46,583 --> 00:20:48,196
Just trying to feel comfortable.

404
00:20:49,299 --> 00:20:51,570
Let me see. Who is that?

405
00:20:56,473 --> 00:20:58,910
I wonder who.

406
00:21:05,885 --> 00:21:07,215
Uncle!

407
00:21:07,771 --> 00:21:09,785
Let me see who it is.

408
00:21:11,721 --> 00:21:15,357
Emily, is Kumail telling you
if besides being super Uber,

409
00:21:15,359 --> 00:21:18,293
He also does
single shows?

410
00:21:18,295 --> 00:21:20,282
No, he didn't tell me.

411
00:21:20,282 --> 00:21:22,470
Are you serious? /
It's nothing.

412
00:21:22,495 --> 00:21:24,399
That's just something I did.

413
00:21:24,401 --> 00:21:27,169
What is the difference between single shows
with stand-up? / It makes no difference.

414
00:21:27,194 --> 00:21:31,055
I think it's because of the many changes
wigs and costumes.

415
00:21:31,080 --> 00:21:33,377
And there are many acting in it.

416
00:21:33,402 --> 00:21:35,567
Then in the end,

417
00:21:35,567 --> 00:21:38,079
You do an awkward
conversation when you say,

418
00:21:38,081 --> 00:21:40,048
"I like it very much."

419
00:21:40,050 --> 00:21:42,028
But I guess you will love it.

420
00:21:42,028 --> 00:21:44,386
I really like that.

421
00:21:44,388 --> 00:21:46,421
I can't wait to see this show.

422
00:21:46,423 --> 00:21:48,421
Yes. / Okay, you won't
ever see the show...

423
00:21:48,423 --> 00:21:50,046
... because of that... / You have to see. /
You have to.

424
00:21:50,046 --> 00:21:51,566
It's not ready yet. That... /
You have to...

425
00:21:51,566 --> 00:21:53,625
You will like his acting. /
You have to see it.

426
00:21:53,625 --> 00:21:55,497
They make fun of you.
It's very different.

427
00:21:55,522 --> 00:21:57,412
They play me or you? /
It's actually very significant.

428
00:21:57,412 --> 00:21:59,173
It looks like they are
toying with you.

429
00:22:01,604 --> 00:22:05,240
I'm 12 years old and this...

430
00:22:05,242 --> 00:22:07,609
This is home.

431
00:22:08,292 --> 00:22:10,612
It feels like I never left.

432
00:22:10,614 --> 00:22:12,720
You kiss it?

433
00:22:12,720 --> 00:22:16,724
Mother my mother cooks
Murgh Rogan Josh.

434
00:22:16,749 --> 00:22:18,987
Damn./
Do you hear that?

435
00:22:18,989 --> 00:22:22,858
That my father watched
cricket on television.

436
00:22:22,860 --> 00:22:24,749
Do you feel that?

437
00:22:24,749 --> 00:22:27,762
That's the weight of Pakistani history.

438
00:22:27,762 --> 00:22:29,923
Pakistan was formed when it split...

439
00:22:29,923 --> 00:22:34,308
... from its biggest rival, India,
on August 14, 1947.

440
00:22:35,612 --> 00:22:36,938
Six home runs.

441
00:22:36,940 --> 00:22:38,923
Silly mid on. Short mid-wicket.
(The term cricket)

442
00:22:38,923 --> 00:22:40,943
Mid-wicket.
Deep mid-wicket.

443
00:22:40,943 --> 00:22:44,815
Mid on. Long on. Long off.
Bowler. Mid off.

444
00:22:45,781 --> 00:22:48,049
I have to go after the
show is finished. I can't stay.

445
00:22:48,051 --> 00:22:49,317
OK./
Okay.

446
00:22:49,319 --> 00:22:51,392
If you become
silly mid on fielder,

447
00:22:51,417 --> 00:22:54,168
You know you will soon
get a yorker.

448
00:22:54,775 --> 00:22:59,725
In conclusion, the largest export of Pakistan is cotton and...  Concrete.

449
00:22:59,750 --> 00:23:00,996
Kill me. /
That's right.

450
00:23:00,998 --> 00:23:02,497
Eid al-Fitr, this is our Christmas.

451
00:23:02,499 --> 00:23:04,975
Except instead of the typical Christmas meat
ham,

452
00:23:04,975 --> 00:23:07,235
We present Mithai,

453
00:23:07,237 --> 00:23:08,704
Which will be my Khansamah, Chris,
will present it for you now.

454
00:23:08,704 --> 00:23:11,940


455
00:23:11,942 --> 00:23:14,943
Khansamah in
Urdu means "Waiter."

456
00:23:14,945 --> 00:23:16,709
If you make it at home,

457
00:23:16,734 --> 00:23:20,589
The main ingredients are
condensed milk, sugar and love.

458
00:23:20,614 --> 00:23:22,542
At least, that's my mother's recipe.

459
00:23:22,542 --> 00:23:25,497
Hey, you look like
child toys from Malaysia.

460
00:23:25,497 --> 00:23:27,668
... for the Pakistani national anthem?

461
00:23:39,119 --> 00:23:41,503
Hey ./
Hey. What do you think?

462
00:23:41,505 --> 00:23:43,424
I think that's good.

463
00:23:43,424 --> 00:23:47,520
Yes? / I never knew Pakistan
had the biggest irrigation system in the world.

464
00:23:47,520 --> 00:23:51,046
Yes, around 14 million hectares of land are irrigated.

465
00:23:51,048 --> 00:23:52,514
After I read that,
I thought,

466
00:23:52,516 --> 00:23:54,471
"That must enter the show." /
Right.

467
00:23:54,471 --> 00:23:56,107
Hi, Emily./Hei./
Hi, everyone.

468
00:23:56,107 --> 00:23:58,687
Hey. Dude, that...
You're very charming, friend.

469
00:23:58,689 --> 00:24:00,438
That's the best we have ever seen.

470
00:24:00,438 --> 00:24:05,293
Yes, it's very honest and good.

471
00:24:05,295 --> 00:24:06,962
Do you know what I am aware of in the middle?

472
00:24:06,964 --> 00:24:08,977
You're from Pakistan. /
Right.

473
00:24:08,977 --> 00:24:10,808
Good, happy to see you, Emily./
Yes. Okay, bro, everyone.

474
00:24:10,808 --> 00:24:12,839
Good. Hey, friends. /
Maintain...

475
00:24:13,694 --> 00:24:16,071
They look like him //
They are very good.

476
00:24:16,073 --> 00:24:17,822
Seriously, what do you think?

477
00:24:17,822 --> 00:24:19,795
It is still in the development stage.

478
00:24:19,795 --> 00:24:23,411
I like it very much.
I learned a lot about Pakistan...

479
00:24:23,413 --> 00:24:25,907
... and cricket and all its positions.

480
00:24:25,907 --> 00:24:28,750
But I hope I can learn more about you.

481
00:24:28,752 --> 00:24:31,014
Does that make sense? /
Yes.

482
00:24:53,109 --> 00:24:54,175
Hey.

483
00:24:54,177 --> 00:24:56,151
Hi.

484
00:24:56,645 --> 00:24:58,270
It's 3 o'clock in the morning.

485
00:24:58,270 --> 00:25:02,350
What restaurants on the corner
the road is still open?

486
00:25:02,352 --> 00:25:07,062
That's 24 hours. Why, do you want orange meringue pie?

487
00:25:07,062 --> 00:25:08,657
You're so funny.

488
00:25:08,657 --> 00:25:14,374
No, actually I really need a cup of coffee.

489
00:25:14,374 --> 00:25:17,466
I can make you coffee.

490
00:25:17,700 --> 00:25:21,125
I like restaurant coffee.
I like the feeling of being burnt.

491
00:25:21,150 --> 00:25:23,322
Good, I come with you. /
No.

492
00:25:23,347 --> 00:25:25,372
Why do you want to do that? /
It's a bad environment.

493
00:25:25,372 --> 00:25:26,789
I won't let you
go alone.

494
00:25:26,789 --> 00:25:28,268
Why? Because I'm a woman? /
Alright.

495
00:25:28,293 --> 00:25:30,483
Seriously, that's the most wrong thing I've ever heard.

496
00:25:30,483 --> 00:25:32,747
Why are you acting so weird? /
Fuck you! That is not true.

497
00:25:32,749 --> 00:25:34,688
You're so weird now. /
You're weird!

498
00:25:34,713 --> 00:25:36,257
You are acting very strange. /
Why?

499
00:25:36,282 --> 00:25:38,126
I want to sleep while it's time to sleep. /
This is normal.

500
00:25:38,126 --> 00:25:40,073
Women go looking for coffee
at midnight!

501
00:25:40,098 --> 00:25:41,289
Have you never had a girlfriend before?

502
00:25:41,291 --> 00:25:43,180
This is what it feels like. /
Are you okay?

503
00:25:43,180 --> 00:25:44,922
Everything is not good.
All is not good.

504
00:25:44,922 --> 00:25:47,896
Hey, you can tell me all,
you know that, & apos; right?

505
00:25:47,921 --> 00:25:51,996
You can tell me anything. /
I want to defecate, okay ?!

506
00:25:53,385 --> 00:25:56,538
I want to defecate
very large.

507
00:25:56,540 --> 00:25:58,506
I can't throw water
in your bathroom...

508
00:25:58,508 --> 00:26:01,270
... because you don't have matches and
you don't have air conditioning.

509
00:26:01,270 --> 00:26:03,949
What kind of person doesn't have
matches or air conditioning on the toilet ?!

510
00:26:03,974 --> 00:26:07,040
The walls are very thin and
Chris is out there.

511
00:26:07,040 --> 00:26:09,505
Please stop laughing.
I hope.

512
00:26:09,505 --> 00:26:11,831
OK. I have an idea.

513
00:26:22,015 --> 00:26:24,974
Hey. How are you?

514
00:26:24,974 --> 00:26:27,767
I don't want to talk about that.

515
00:26:33,409 --> 00:26:35,229
See and learn, Dik.

516
00:26:35,229 --> 00:26:38,165
Everything is a matter of transfer
load and rotational force.

517
00:26:40,855 --> 00:26:42,376
OK.

518
00:26:45,389 --> 00:26:48,688
Hey, you're like Sammy
Sosa Pakistan.

519
00:26:51,612 --> 00:26:53,894
He is very good.
Do what he does.

520
00:26:56,747 --> 00:26:57,799
mine.

521
00:26:57,801 --> 00:27:00,093
Come on. Let me... /
Mine.

522
00:27:00,117 --> 00:27:01,647
Mine, mine, mine,
thank you.

523
00:27:01,647 --> 00:27:03,614
Why did you get Chana? /
You ate it.

524
00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:06,474
The cake is very tasty.

525
00:27:06,476 --> 00:27:08,276
This is a biscuit.
Listen to yourself.

526
00:27:08,278 --> 00:27:11,279
You're like no Pakistani.
"Cake."

527
00:27:11,281 --> 00:27:13,748
Sounds like Julia Louis-Dreyfus.

528
00:27:13,750 --> 00:27:15,403
Like a burger.

529
00:27:15,403 --> 00:27:17,127
I'm not a burger. /
Yes, you're a burger.

530
00:27:17,127 --> 00:27:18,282
I'm not a burger. /
You're a fat and big burger.

531
00:27:18,307 --> 00:27:19,721
And biscuits are actually
English terms.

532
00:27:19,723 --> 00:27:21,998
Thank you for all the information I don't care about.

533
00:27:21,998 --> 00:27:24,463
And you should listen to
and grow a beard.

534
00:27:24,697 --> 00:27:26,394
It's very itchy.
I've tried it.

535
00:27:26,396 --> 00:27:27,694
It's uneven. /
Is that itchy?

536
00:27:27,696 --> 00:27:29,144
I know I sound like a baby. /
Try being an adult,

537
00:27:29,144 --> 00:27:30,989
And give conditioner like me.

538
00:27:30,989 --> 00:27:33,366
What is the essence of Muslims who grow beards?

539
00:27:33,366 --> 00:27:35,051
That's unreasonable, right?

540
00:27:35,076 --> 00:27:37,204
Who decides if we
must grow a beard.

541
00:27:37,229 --> 00:27:39,440
But you will do...
So there are billions of us...

542
00:27:39,442 --> 00:27:42,436
... and you're the only one
right. So?

543
00:27:42,436 --> 00:27:44,846
So the sun just shines on you
now.

544
00:27:44,848 --> 00:27:46,424
It splits.

545
00:27:49,818 --> 00:27:54,689
I have to tell you
something, brother.

546
00:27:54,691 --> 00:27:57,216
Here it is. Yes.

547
00:27:58,743 --> 00:28:01,583
I date this woman. /
Sure.

548
00:28:01,583 --> 00:28:03,485
He is white.

549
00:28:03,485 --> 00:28:05,800
I thought you would say involved
in hit and run...

550
00:28:05,802 --> 00:28:07,473
... or caught
fake a check,

551
00:28:07,473 --> 00:28:08,646
But white women ?!

552
00:28:08,646 --> 00:28:11,140
I mean, it's very cliché!

553
00:28:11,140 --> 00:28:13,891
It's okay, we hate terrorists. /
Just... Sorry.

554
00:28:15,864 --> 00:28:17,856
Look, I understand.
You're in America,

555
00:28:17,881 --> 00:28:20,682
And you want to cut a little grass
and see what it's like,

556
00:28:20,684 --> 00:28:24,252
But in the end you
must marry a Pakistani woman.

557
00:28:24,254 --> 00:28:28,018
I dated
other women,

558
00:28:28,018 --> 00:28:29,891
But then I married Fatima.

559
00:28:29,893 --> 00:28:32,854
We hardly speak a word
in the first few months,

560
00:28:32,854 --> 00:28:35,797
But now, Kumi,
she's like my best friend.

561
00:28:35,799 --> 00:28:39,283
I know. / You must immediately
break up with him.

562
00:28:39,283 --> 00:28:43,571
If I find someone who is the same
the good for me like Fatima for you,

563
00:28:43,573 --> 00:28:45,155
Mother will understand, right?

564
00:28:45,155 --> 00:28:47,691
He won't reduce his love for me.

565
00:28:47,691 --> 00:28:49,616
He will certainly decrease
love you.

566
00:28:49,616 --> 00:28:51,646
Slowly, it becomes...

567
00:28:51,648 --> 00:28:54,782
What is the term when a man stops
returning a call from a woman?

568
00:28:54,784 --> 00:28:56,373
"Become a ghost"? /
Right.

569
00:28:56,373 --> 00:28:59,554
You have to end it now or
mom will make you a ghost.

570
00:28:59,556 --> 00:29:03,055
Come on. Hitting exercises.

571
00:29:10,566 --> 00:29:13,469
I like all
brightly colored fruits.

572
00:29:13,469 --> 00:29:15,803
I think that includes
fruit development.

573
00:29:15,805 --> 00:29:18,776
It tastes like stale grape juice. /
Yes.

574
00:29:18,776 --> 00:29:20,808
Why do you really understand
about wine?

575
00:29:22,381 --> 00:29:24,562
Because...

576
00:29:26,698 --> 00:29:29,651
... I'm not so happy
with my first marriage,

577
00:29:29,653 --> 00:29:31,329
And I drink a lot,

578
00:29:31,329 --> 00:29:34,055
And one way to cover
too much to drink is...

579
00:29:34,057 --> 00:29:37,129
... by knowing more about wine. /
Wait, sorry, are you saying?

580
00:29:37,154 --> 00:29:39,701
If you know a lot about wine,
cover for drinking a lot.

581
00:29:39,701 --> 00:29:41,863
I mean, information is very important...

582
00:29:41,865 --> 00:29:43,776
... if you try to
forget the past.

583
00:29:43,776 --> 00:29:46,067
Yes, I was married.

584
00:29:46,069 --> 00:29:49,070
Have you ever been married? /
That's right. I've been married.

585
00:29:49,072 --> 00:29:51,817
Do you want to talk about other questions or...?

586
00:29:51,842 --> 00:29:54,198
Yes, because I don't have
other questions... / No.

587
00:29:54,198 --> 00:29:57,578
... besides, when did you get married?
When did you divorce?

588
00:29:57,580 --> 00:29:59,383
What is his name?
How tall is it?

589
00:29:59,383 --> 00:30:00,715
Do you love him?

590
00:30:00,717 --> 00:30:03,385
I think I have some questions.

591
00:30:03,853 --> 00:30:08,323
His name is Ryan.

592
00:30:08,325 --> 00:30:10,358
We met while in college.

593
00:30:10,360 --> 00:30:14,495
All my friends are married
very young, so...

594
00:30:14,497 --> 00:30:19,467
We got married, then one day
I was in a restaurant,

595
00:30:19,469 --> 00:30:22,937
And I see this
pair kissing.

596
00:30:22,939 --> 00:30:28,739
I thought, "I think my husband
doesn't like that."

597
00:30:28,764 --> 00:30:30,411
"But it doesn't matter."

598
00:30:30,413 --> 00:30:32,647
But another part of my brain thinks,

599
00:30:32,672 --> 00:30:35,649
"No, that's not good.
This is your life."

600
00:30:35,649 --> 00:30:37,545
I think this makes you
scared.

601
00:30:37,545 --> 00:30:40,319
Does this make you panic? /
This doesn't panic me.

602
00:30:41,474 --> 00:30:43,958
I don't want to make you
feel depressed.

603
00:30:43,960 --> 00:30:46,686
And I've only known you
a few months,

604
00:30:46,686 --> 00:30:54,135
But I want to tell you,
I'm very interested in you.

605
00:30:54,137 --> 00:30:57,472
That's the last thing I wished for.

606
00:30:59,508 --> 00:31:03,166
This is also the last thing I wished for.

607
00:31:03,166 --> 00:31:07,382
And I also feel
very interested in you.

608
00:31:09,172 --> 00:31:11,116
That's a strange thing to say.

609
00:31:11,116 --> 00:31:13,988
Why? I say what
you actually said.

610
00:31:13,990 --> 00:31:17,035
Yes, it's not strange when I say it.

611
00:31:18,167 --> 00:31:19,815
No...

612
00:31:19,901 --> 00:31:21,807
It's okay.

613
00:31:29,537 --> 00:31:33,608
Look, my parents will come
this weekend.

614
00:31:33,610 --> 00:31:37,260
That's good. / You might want to come with
to meet them at lunch?

615
00:31:38,148 --> 00:31:40,882
We can't, because the rules are
two days, & right?

616
00:31:40,884 --> 00:31:43,684
You will come to the party
Friday night Mary, & apos?

617
00:31:43,686 --> 00:31:45,019
Then we might
be able to spend the night together,

618
00:31:45,021 --> 00:31:47,577
I can't see you
until Monday, so...

619
00:31:47,769 --> 00:31:51,893
OK. I really want
to meet your parents.

620
00:31:51,895 --> 00:31:53,795
They live in the city, & apos; right?

621
00:31:53,797 --> 00:31:58,355
They live in suburban areas, and...

622
00:31:58,355 --> 00:32:00,435
... I don't often meet them.

623
00:32:00,437 --> 00:32:03,513
Have they ever asked about me?
What do they think?

624
00:32:03,538 --> 00:32:05,039
Do they want
to meet me?

625
00:32:05,041 --> 00:32:06,797
My parents want to meet
with you. / Of course,

626
00:32:06,797 --> 00:32:08,576
Of course. They are very
want to meet you.

627
00:32:08,597 --> 00:32:11,841
Goodness. / What are you doing? / Yes.

628
00:32:11,866 --> 00:32:14,546
What's wrong? Are you... /
I'm fine.

629
00:32:14,571 --> 00:32:17,435
Do you need help? /
No, I think my legs are just sprained.

630
00:32:17,460 --> 00:32:21,623
I joined skinny hip-hop dance
last weekend.

631
00:32:21,648 --> 00:32:23,093
You should check it out.
Do you want ice?

632
00:32:23,093 --> 00:32:24,456
I don't need anything. /
I can find you an ice bag.

633
00:32:24,456 --> 00:32:25,761
Look, I can walk.
I am fine.

634
00:32:25,761 --> 00:32:27,451
I can carry you. /
Kumail, seriously, stop.

635
00:32:27,451 --> 00:32:29,557
I can carry you
all day. Stop.

636
00:32:33,258 --> 00:32:35,870
Hey, I like your friends.

637
00:32:35,872 --> 00:32:38,072
Craig?

638
00:32:38,074 --> 00:32:39,807
Or is that Greg?

639
00:32:39,809 --> 00:32:42,633
I find it difficult to distinguish
those names.

640
00:32:42,799 --> 00:32:44,640
I'm glad I like him because
I don't want to have to...

641
00:32:44,640 --> 00:32:46,915
... make excuses for
avoid him, you know?

642
00:32:46,915 --> 00:32:51,489
Like, "No. I want to play
kites tonight."

643
00:32:51,489 --> 00:32:55,308
You know, in England,
Craig is pronounced Crayg...

644
00:32:55,308 --> 00:32:58,259
And that's good because so
how to write it, right?

645
00:32:58,261 --> 00:33:01,065
In essence, he's a nice person.

646
00:33:03,567 --> 00:33:05,938
I want to tell you about that.

647
00:33:05,938 --> 00:33:10,255
Are you a judge?
"Pakistan & the Next Top Model?"

648
00:33:10,806 --> 00:33:13,892
No. Alright... /
Seriously, who are these women?

649
00:33:13,892 --> 00:33:17,068
Do you know we have a
matchmaking culture?

650
00:33:17,936 --> 00:33:20,026
These are the women.

651
00:33:20,026 --> 00:33:23,050
These are women in Pakistan who want to marry you?

652
00:33:23,052 --> 00:33:24,752
They are not in Pakistan.

653
00:33:24,754 --> 00:33:26,246
Have you met them?

654
00:33:26,246 --> 00:33:29,190
Only with my parents.
But we haven't...

655
00:33:29,192 --> 00:33:31,545
But you are not serious about this, & right?

656
00:33:31,545 --> 00:33:35,263
That was my mother's request.
I just followed it.

657
00:33:35,265 --> 00:33:38,866
Do you know about both of us?

658
00:33:41,135 --> 00:33:44,072
He doesn't know about me, & apos; right?

659
00:33:44,773 --> 00:33:46,607
No.

660
00:33:54,487 --> 00:33:55,797
Emily... /
Bastard!

661
00:33:55,797 --> 00:33:57,677
Can you... /
Five months from a red flag.

662
00:33:57,702 --> 00:34:00,621
Gosh, I'm really stupid.

663
00:34:00,623 --> 00:34:02,673
You avoid my parents.

664
00:34:02,673 --> 00:34:04,870
Gosh, the regulation is two days.

665
00:34:04,870 --> 00:34:06,057
No, it has nothing to do. /
Seriously.

666
00:34:06,057 --> 00:34:08,434
Red flag after
red flag.

667
00:34:09,042 --> 00:34:11,779
You are a liar.
You lie to me.

668
00:34:11,779 --> 00:34:13,801
You lie to your parents.

669
00:34:13,803 --> 00:34:16,137
Likewise with people
you like.

670
00:34:16,139 --> 00:34:18,606
Are there people who aren't
you lying?

671
00:34:18,608 --> 00:34:20,708
I want to meet them
so I can tell them...

672
00:34:20,710 --> 00:34:22,047
... if you are a liar!

673
00:34:22,047 --> 00:34:24,545
You didn't tell me divorce questions until recently.

674
00:34:24,570 --> 00:34:26,501
You also hide something.

675
00:34:26,501 --> 00:34:30,284
My divorce doesn't mean that our future is impossible.

676
00:34:30,286 --> 00:34:32,186
That actually means
in a different direction.

677
00:34:32,188 --> 00:34:34,772
I don't hide
anything from you. Understand?

678
00:34:34,797 --> 00:34:35,943
I'm really open.

679
00:34:35,943 --> 00:34:38,565
Do you want to know what is in my cigar box?

680
00:34:38,590 --> 00:34:41,443
Stickers.
Stickers and stamps.

681
00:34:41,443 --> 00:34:43,459
Aren't you a therapist? Aren't you
should handle the problem...

682
00:34:43,459 --> 00:34:46,233
Where are my shoes ?!

683
00:34:46,235 --> 00:34:49,193
Shouldn't you be able to
deal with this better...

684
00:34:49,193 --> 00:34:52,536
... than you do now? /
I express my feelings!

685
00:34:54,743 --> 00:34:58,230
You know how we say
matchmaking in Pakistan, Emily?

686
00:34:58,255 --> 00:35:00,115
"Marriage." Understand?

687
00:35:00,115 --> 00:35:02,458
We call it marriage.
There are other types of marriage.

688
00:35:02,458 --> 00:35:03,866
It's called marriage because
love and it's bad.

689
00:35:03,866 --> 00:35:05,472
My cousin, Rehan,
married an Irish woman...

690
00:35:05,497 --> 00:35:07,088
... and he was expelled from the family.

691
00:35:07,090 --> 00:35:10,224
No one is allowed to speak
with him.

692
00:35:10,226 --> 00:35:11,776
Why did you say this to me?

693
00:35:11,776 --> 00:35:13,394
Because I don't think you
will understand...

694
00:35:13,396 --> 00:35:14,929
... and that's right!

695
00:35:14,931 --> 00:35:16,931
You think I can't
understand your life...

696
00:35:16,933 --> 00:35:18,538
... in everything? /
Do you think you can understand me?

697
00:35:18,563 --> 00:35:20,267
I fight 1,400 years of culture!

698
00:35:20,269 --> 00:35:22,310
I'm bad at high school!

699
00:35:22,335 --> 00:35:24,809
That's very different!

700
00:35:26,120 --> 00:35:28,261
I'm sorry.

701
00:35:30,779 --> 00:35:33,914
I can't lose my family.

702
00:35:37,786 --> 00:35:41,203
You can imagine the world...

703
00:35:42,258 --> 00:35:45,259
... where do we end together?

704
00:35:48,263 --> 00:35:50,798
I don't know.

705
00:35:54,946 --> 00:35:56,737
I have to go.

706
00:35:56,739 --> 00:35:59,206
Don't contact me.

707
00:36:03,046 --> 00:36:05,946
Multigrain Bread, Pumpernickel,

708
00:36:05,948 --> 00:36:10,851
Pita Bread, hot dog bread,
pastries.

709
00:36:10,853 --> 00:36:13,177
I can't eat it.

710
00:36:13,747 --> 00:36:15,504
I don't want children.

711
00:36:15,504 --> 00:36:19,136
People say,
"Sam, you will like it."

712
00:36:19,136 --> 00:36:22,269
"The child you will have,
he will be your best friend."

713
00:36:22,269 --> 00:36:26,133
Friends who spit you
and urinate everywhere...

714
00:36:26,135 --> 00:36:27,401
... and constantly shouting.

715
00:36:27,403 --> 00:36:30,071
I already have friends
like that.

716
00:36:30,073 --> 00:36:31,372
People say, "Sam..."

717
00:36:31,374 --> 00:36:33,343
I know you were hit, but...

718
00:36:33,343 --> 00:36:35,402
Emily is a good person.
I didn't say otherwise.

719
00:36:35,402 --> 00:36:38,312
I mean this is the natural way
the universe told you...

720
00:36:38,314 --> 00:36:41,182
... to get your moment,
becomes a little selfish and pursues your career.

721
00:36:41,184 --> 00:36:43,187
Bob Dalavan will come this Thursday.

722
00:36:43,187 --> 00:36:44,635
If you get a Festival
Comedy Montreal,

723
00:36:44,635 --> 00:36:46,454
That will change your situation.

724
00:36:46,456 --> 00:36:48,123
You don't want to be stuck
in Chicago, right?

725
00:36:48,123 --> 00:36:50,157
You don't want to end
like Sam Highsmith,

726
00:36:50,159 --> 00:36:54,332
Who has done a joke
"people say Sam" since & apos; 03.

727
00:36:54,941 --> 00:36:56,363
People say, "Sam..."

728
00:36:56,365 --> 00:36:58,150
That's what you want in your life? /
It's like...

729
00:36:58,150 --> 00:36:59,967
Is that what you want? /
That's amazing.

730
00:36:59,969 --> 00:37:01,638
And that's the same material.

731
00:37:01,638 --> 00:37:03,204
What do people say? /
Sam.

732
00:37:03,206 --> 00:37:04,972
What do people say? /
Sam.

733
00:37:04,972 --> 00:37:06,581
I'm Sam Highsmith.
Thank you very much.

734
00:37:06,581 --> 00:37:07,837
I will tell him.

735
00:37:07,837 --> 00:37:09,691
He is crazy. / I will tell him
I really understand him.

736
00:37:09,691 --> 00:37:11,849
I will tell him. I will... /
He never wrote new material.

737
00:37:12,002 --> 00:37:13,481
Good appearance, friend. /
I feel it, man.

738
00:37:13,483 --> 00:37:15,893
Very captivating. / It was mine. /
I like new material.

739
00:37:16,775 --> 00:37:19,286
We should be ashamed of ourselves. We are weak.

740
00:37:19,524 --> 00:37:21,608
I will not mention that
obsession,

741
00:37:21,608 --> 00:37:23,334
But I'm pretty smart
with magic.

742
00:37:23,334 --> 00:37:24,887
What?

743
00:37:24,887 --> 00:37:27,128
Can you make his stomach disappear?

744
00:37:27,130 --> 00:37:30,247
Come on. I am very happy
with my stomach.

745
00:37:30,247 --> 00:37:31,867
Do you have one dollar?

746
00:37:31,867 --> 00:37:34,435
I will give you something.

747
00:37:34,437 --> 00:37:37,138
20? Wasteful people.

748
00:37:37,140 --> 00:37:38,839
OK. Andrew Jackson.

749
00:37:38,841 --> 00:37:43,092
Don't you think he looks
handsome wearing glasses?

750
00:37:47,150 --> 00:37:50,417
Alright./
Good.

751
00:37:50,419 --> 00:37:52,253
He... All right. /
Right.

752
00:37:52,255 --> 00:37:54,999
Okay, cool. /
Yes.

753
00:37:54,999 --> 00:37:56,369
OK.

754
00:37:56,369 --> 00:37:58,526
Now we sprinkle
magic dust.

755
00:37:58,528 --> 00:38:00,207
Yes, you can't do that... /
Just a little.

756
00:38:00,207 --> 00:38:02,363
... without magic dust. /
Yes, I need it.

757
00:38:02,365 --> 00:38:04,151
OK.

758
00:38:04,151 --> 00:38:05,348
Abracadabra.

759
00:38:05,348 --> 00:38:08,731
OK. Watch carefully.

760
00:38:12,449 --> 00:38:14,162
That's amazing.

761
00:38:14,187 --> 00:38:16,315
And he does look
more handsome with glasses.

762
00:38:16,315 --> 00:38:17,752
Right? /
Yes.

763
00:38:17,752 --> 00:38:21,038
How do you do that? /
Magicians never tell the trick.

764
00:38:21,611 --> 00:38:23,317
This is your 20 dollars, Mr. Agreed.

765
00:38:23,319 --> 00:38:25,486
I can still use
$ 20 to buy something?

766
00:38:25,488 --> 00:38:27,481
That looks better
now, isn't it?

767
00:38:32,127 --> 00:38:34,629
I watch this
monster movie with my friend.

768
00:38:34,654 --> 00:38:36,263
He looks at me
and says,

769
00:38:36,265 --> 00:38:38,579
"What are you doing
in that situation?"

770
00:38:38,579 --> 00:38:41,468
I will never be the last person to live.

771
00:38:41,470 --> 00:38:43,871
I will be the first person to die.

772
00:38:43,873 --> 00:38:46,935
I die so other characters
can find out...

773
00:38:46,960 --> 00:38:48,997
... if something strange
is happening.

774
00:38:49,022 --> 00:38:51,628
I will go alone
to look for cats.

775
00:38:52,982 --> 00:38:56,584
I never knew if
was actually a monster.

776
00:38:56,586 --> 00:39:00,402
For me, the film flow is
in the research building...

777
00:39:00,427 --> 00:39:03,477
... and the cat disappears!
End.

778
00:39:03,593 --> 00:39:05,652
Denise...

779
00:39:05,977 --> 00:39:09,007
This is your name in Urdu.

780
00:39:09,032 --> 00:39:11,385
Wow, that's really cool.

781
00:39:12,044 --> 00:39:13,420
Kumail?

782
00:39:13,445 --> 00:39:15,287
Hey ./
Hey, Bob Dalavan.

783
00:39:15,287 --> 00:39:17,496
Yes, I know.

784
00:39:17,623 --> 00:39:21,520
Your stage action is very interesting tonight.

785
00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:23,878
Thank you.
I just want you to know.

786
00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:26,648
I will go.
But you made it into the final...

787
00:39:26,673 --> 00:39:29,231
... for the Montreal show. /
Gosh. thanks.

788
00:39:29,231 --> 00:39:30,772
You too, Mary.

789
00:39:30,797 --> 00:39:32,152
Alright./
Good.

790
00:39:32,154 --> 00:39:34,256
See you there.

791
00:39:34,281 --> 00:39:35,545
Yes. / Good. /
We will communicate.

792
00:39:35,545 --> 00:39:38,359
What about C-Dog? /
Who is that?

793
00:39:38,361 --> 00:39:40,361
me. How about me?

794
00:39:40,363 --> 00:39:42,363
Do you know?

795
00:39:42,365 --> 00:39:45,032
Your material is funny, okay?

796
00:39:49,111 --> 00:39:51,058
I will take you out.

797
00:39:52,429 --> 00:39:55,910
Hey, do you want to go
somewhere?

798
00:39:55,912 --> 00:39:57,912
Yes, let's go.

799
00:40:16,321 --> 00:40:17,615
Hello?

800
00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:20,079
Kumail, this is Jessie.

801
00:40:20,104 --> 00:40:21,968
Hey. Who?

802
00:40:21,993 --> 00:40:24,135
Jessie. I'm Emily's college friend.

803
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:27,123
Listen, Emily is in the hospital.
He has severe flu.

804
00:40:27,148 --> 00:40:30,049
What? / Can you
there, please?

805
00:40:30,074 --> 00:40:32,154
We need someone there.
But we have an exam tomorrow,

806
00:40:32,154 --> 00:40:33,681
So nobody can go.

807
00:40:33,683 --> 00:40:35,282
He is still in the ER.

808
00:40:35,284 --> 00:40:38,218
Can you go and accompany him
then take him home, please?

809
00:40:38,220 --> 00:40:41,090
I was there long enough,
but I have to go.

810
00:40:54,369 --> 00:40:57,581
Hi. I'm looking for Emily Gardner.

811
00:40:58,063 --> 00:41:01,850
Emily Gardner.
He is being treated...

812
00:41:30,572 --> 00:41:32,191
Hey.

813
00:41:33,756 --> 00:41:35,370
What are you doing here?

814
00:41:35,395 --> 00:41:40,878
Jessie called me, and wanted me to make sure you were fine.

815
00:41:43,218 --> 00:41:44,733
How are you doing? /
Good.

816
00:41:44,733 --> 00:41:46,720
I'm very good.
Never better.

817
00:41:46,722 --> 00:41:48,622
1,000% good.

818
00:41:48,624 --> 00:41:51,225
I'm just unconscious
myself in the office.

819
00:41:51,227 --> 00:41:54,141
I didn't have breakfast this morning.

820
00:41:54,141 --> 00:41:57,698
Breakfast is the most important food in a day. You know that.

821
00:41:58,765 --> 00:42:01,513
Ms. Gardner, your room will be ready soon, okay?

822
00:42:01,538 --> 00:42:04,806
No. I want to go home
and sleep in my own bed.

823
00:42:04,806 --> 00:42:07,608
Sir, can you please
come out for a moment?

824
00:42:07,610 --> 00:42:08,985
If you want to stay here,

825
00:42:09,009 --> 00:42:11,288
Please meet the security guard and
ask for permission to visit.

826
00:42:11,313 --> 00:42:12,922
Where is the security table?

827
00:42:12,922 --> 00:42:14,867
Below...

828
00:42:14,867 --> 00:42:17,584
Right when you walk in,
there is a security desk.

829
00:42:17,586 --> 00:42:21,278
The security guard table is
at the security desk. I understand.

830
00:42:22,634 --> 00:42:24,158
Want me to bring you something

831
00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:28,099
White water? Juice? Coffee?

832
00:42:30,771 --> 00:42:33,168
Can I talk to you for a moment?

833
00:42:34,053 --> 00:42:35,604
I am back soon.

834
00:42:37,359 --> 00:42:39,545
There is a severe infection in his lungs,

835
00:42:39,545 --> 00:42:41,236
And all vital
signs increase.

836
00:42:41,236 --> 00:42:43,143
Does he have HIV?

837
00:42:43,145 --> 00:42:45,026
What? No. He...

838
00:42:45,051 --> 00:42:47,281
Are you her husband? /
No.

839
00:42:47,283 --> 00:42:49,023
We must immediately
intubate it.

840
00:42:49,048 --> 00:42:51,764
I need a family signature,
so I will ask you again...

841
00:42:51,789 --> 00:42:54,701
Are you her husband? /
What does it mean to "intubate"?

842
00:42:54,726 --> 00:42:56,466
We have to connect him to the tool
help breath, and to do that,

843
00:42:56,466 --> 00:42:59,560
We have to make him in a medical coma induction position.

844
00:42:59,562 --> 00:43:01,676
Coma? /
Right.

845
00:43:01,676 --> 00:43:04,064
In order to make it stable so that
we can overcome the infection.

846
00:43:04,089 --> 00:43:05,957
And that must be done now.

847
00:43:05,957 --> 00:43:08,669
So I will ask you
the last time...

848
00:43:08,671 --> 00:43:11,772
Are you her husband?

849
00:43:17,846 --> 00:43:19,808
What happened?

850
00:43:19,833 --> 00:43:22,254
What happened? /
You'll be fine.

851
00:43:22,254 --> 00:43:24,351
Calm down and... /
Where did you take me?

852
00:43:35,730 --> 00:43:38,265
You should contact his family.

853
00:44:02,524 --> 00:44:04,791
Sorry.

854
00:44:22,411 --> 00:44:26,052
Hi, Mrs. Gardner,
this is Kumail, her friend Emily.

855
00:44:26,077 --> 00:44:28,085
Sorry to contact you so late.

856
00:44:28,110 --> 00:44:30,079
Emily is fine.

857
00:44:30,104 --> 00:44:32,452
He only needs treatment.
He is fine.

858
00:44:32,454 --> 00:44:36,101
He is at City View Hospital in Chicago...

859
00:44:36,126 --> 00:44:39,722
... in a medical induction coma,
but doctors say everything...

860
00:44:40,733 --> 00:44:43,830
Right, I say "comma."

861
00:45:30,945 --> 00:45:33,847
Hey. I'm Kumail.

862
00:45:36,683 --> 00:45:38,594
We know who you are, Kumail.

863
00:45:38,594 --> 00:45:41,769
Mr. and Mrs. Gardner,
the doctor wants to see you now.

864
00:45:42,714 --> 00:45:44,647
I am back soon.

865
00:45:55,491 --> 00:45:57,901
Look, the doctor will be here soon.

866
00:45:57,901 --> 00:46:00,407
He's just a little late.

867
00:46:00,409 --> 00:46:03,429
Don't worry about
this grieving room.

868
00:46:03,454 --> 00:46:05,183
It's just that this is the only
available room.

869
00:46:05,208 --> 00:46:07,855
OK. Thank you. /
Okay.

870
00:46:18,493 --> 00:46:20,595
Terry, I...

871
00:46:20,620 --> 00:46:22,462
That drives me crazy. /
Yes, I know,

872
00:46:22,464 --> 00:46:24,398
But that makes me feel better.

873
00:46:24,400 --> 00:46:26,152
I just...

874
00:46:26,890 --> 00:46:30,069
Hello. No. Please sit.

875
00:46:30,094 --> 00:46:32,806
I am Dr. Cunningham,
the doctor who handles Emily.

876
00:46:32,808 --> 00:46:34,908
I will coordinate
with all doctors...

877
00:46:34,910 --> 00:46:37,446
... and designing strategies
care.

878
00:46:37,471 --> 00:46:40,580
All doctors? How many? /
Lima. / Five?

879
00:46:40,582 --> 00:46:42,605
Why are so many?
Is that normal?

880
00:46:42,630 --> 00:46:45,070
Right. That's normal for
patients in the ICU.

881
00:46:45,070 --> 00:46:46,821
We need all points of view,

882
00:46:46,846 --> 00:46:50,057
We have checked it. We immediately
intubate orotakreal,

883
00:46:50,059 --> 00:46:52,158
Thankfully it doesn't affect the heart at this point.

884
00:46:52,158 --> 00:46:54,426
We still don't know the core
the problem of the infection,

885
00:46:54,426 --> 00:46:56,248
But we gave him a comprehensive spectrum of
antibiotics.

886
00:46:56,248 --> 00:46:57,424
His right lung has
severe infection...

887
00:46:57,424 --> 00:46:58,754
... and centered around
costodiaphragmatic recess.

888
00:46:58,779 --> 00:47:02,024
Our theory is Methicillin-Resistant
Staphylococcus Aureus.

889
00:47:02,024 --> 00:47:04,111
Staphyl... for a moment. That's "P..." /
Yes.

890
00:47:04,111 --> 00:47:06,940
That's "F" or "Ph"? /
Ph. No. That's Staphylococcus...

891
00:47:17,394 --> 00:47:21,455
That's very convincing, isn't it?

892
00:47:21,457 --> 00:47:25,025
There seems to be a good coma and a bad comma,

893
00:47:25,027 --> 00:47:27,944
And the type they
do with Emily...

894
00:47:27,969 --> 00:47:31,998
... medical induction commas include
coma which is kind of good.

895
00:47:36,537 --> 00:47:40,474
Do you know there are carbohydrates
that are good and bad?

896
00:47:46,220 --> 00:47:47,614
Gremlins...

897
00:47:47,616 --> 00:47:50,983
That can be good or bad. /
Look, Kumail...

898
00:47:51,508 --> 00:47:54,328
We will take care of everything from here, understand?

899
00:47:54,328 --> 00:47:56,156
You are very helpful.

900
00:47:56,158 --> 00:47:59,285
Thank you for
signing the document, and...

901
00:47:59,310 --> 00:48:02,696
Yes, happily. /
But you can leave now.

902
00:48:02,698 --> 00:48:04,998
Alright. /
Understand?

903
00:48:05,000 --> 00:48:06,929
Good.

904
00:48:08,703 --> 00:48:11,104
Peace in the Middle East.

905
00:48:17,012 --> 00:48:20,411
What about this? I saw
sniffer dogs at the airport.

906
00:48:20,436 --> 00:48:21,766
He found "boner."

907
00:48:21,791 --> 00:48:24,285
Does that mean drugs
or bombs?

908
00:48:24,310 --> 00:48:27,514
That's good. What if
besides being at the airport,

909
00:48:27,514 --> 00:48:30,546
You stop comedy and don't
ever do comedy again?

910
00:48:30,546 --> 00:48:33,302
Yes. / Match with you!
It's good and funny.

911
00:48:33,327 --> 00:48:34,512
It's for the good of the audience...

912
00:48:34,512 --> 00:48:37,121
... and they don't need to see your face
or hear your words. That's...

913
00:48:37,146 --> 00:48:40,133
It doesn't matter if I don't come there, right?

914
00:48:40,135 --> 00:48:43,036
I don't need to be there, & apos?

915
00:48:43,038 --> 00:48:45,053
What's wrong?
What happened?

916
00:48:45,053 --> 00:48:48,101
He made his girlfriend in
coma. / Yes.

917
00:48:48,126 --> 00:48:49,382
In the way you do.

918
00:48:49,382 --> 00:48:51,178
He is not my boyfriend. / He doesn't do it, but he agrees...

919
00:48:51,180 --> 00:48:54,088
... documents that allow doctors to...

920
00:48:54,113 --> 00:48:56,410
He suggested it. /
He will be fine.

921
00:48:56,410 --> 00:48:58,518
That's right. They say
he will be fine,

922
00:48:58,543 --> 00:49:01,021
So they will be fine.
Doctors know about drugs.

923
00:49:01,023 --> 00:49:03,832
That's what the doctor does.
They understand medical matters.

924
00:49:03,832 --> 00:49:05,792
This is a medical induction comma.

925
00:49:05,794 --> 00:49:08,213
This is their specialty. /
Maybe.

926
00:49:08,238 --> 00:49:11,383
That might be a good thing. He might be awakened with new abilities.

927
00:49:11,383 --> 00:49:13,233
My cousin was unconscious,

928
00:49:13,233 --> 00:49:15,769
And when he realized, he thought
could be a different language.

929
00:49:15,771 --> 00:49:19,560
That's right? / No. It seems that he
is just talking about his essay.

930
00:49:19,560 --> 00:49:21,641
That's brain damage.

931
00:49:24,047 --> 00:49:25,879
I'll order Taco Bell again.

932
00:49:42,259 --> 00:49:44,478
Did you forget something?

933
00:49:44,503 --> 00:49:46,817
Is he aware? /
Not yet.

934
00:49:46,842 --> 00:49:49,135
And they don't want
tell us anything.

935
00:49:49,137 --> 00:49:51,571
We are here all morning.

936
00:49:51,573 --> 00:49:54,473
I know you said no
want me to stay here,

937
00:49:54,473 --> 00:49:56,610
But I guess I'll keep waiting.

938
00:49:56,612 --> 00:49:57,811
You have broken up.

939
00:49:57,811 --> 00:50:01,420
I'm not sure why you're here.

940
00:50:03,134 --> 00:50:06,823
You don't need to worry about any commitment, Kumail.

941
00:50:06,848 --> 00:50:08,353
You don't want that
when he is still healthy,

942
00:50:08,378 --> 00:50:11,157
So there is no reason to do that when he is unconscious.

943
00:50:11,159 --> 00:50:13,842
This is more complicated than that. /
Really?

944
00:50:13,842 --> 00:50:15,896
Because I know the
"two-day rule."

945
00:50:15,898 --> 00:50:18,630
I know about head shots and secrets.

946
00:50:18,655 --> 00:50:20,710
He told us everything.

947
00:50:20,735 --> 00:50:23,570
You don't have to stay here, Kumail.

948
00:50:23,572 --> 00:50:26,767
You have done a lot.

949
00:50:27,707 --> 00:50:30,408
I will stay here for a while.

950
00:50:32,223 --> 00:50:34,628
What is this chair...
All right.

951
00:50:51,032 --> 00:50:54,200
Does the woman still see me?

952
00:51:13,268 --> 00:51:15,989
Yes, come on. There is no reason...

953
00:51:15,991 --> 00:51:18,895
... he must eat alone
there, isn't that right, honey?

954
00:51:18,920 --> 00:51:20,976
This is a free country.

955
00:51:26,300 --> 00:51:28,234
How is your bread?

956
00:51:28,236 --> 00:51:30,804
The best stuffed bread I've ever eaten.

957
00:51:33,225 --> 00:51:34,838
My taste is good too.

958
00:51:35,612 --> 00:51:37,944
Tuna is always a bet, but...

959
00:51:37,946 --> 00:51:39,713
You know, we are not
near the waters.

960
00:51:39,715 --> 00:51:41,181
We are near the waters.

961
00:51:41,183 --> 00:51:43,288
But it's a lake.

962
00:51:43,313 --> 00:51:46,149
There are no tuna on the lake.

963
00:51:47,144 --> 00:51:50,849
Whatever.
I throw the dice.

964
00:51:50,874 --> 00:51:54,160
I got seven, I guess.

965
00:51:54,162 --> 00:51:56,564
Whatever the best dice number.

966
00:51:56,589 --> 00:52:00,867
So, 9/11.

967
00:52:03,400 --> 00:52:04,838
No, I mean...

968
00:52:04,840 --> 00:52:08,808
I always talk about the
with...

969
00:52:08,810 --> 00:52:13,543
with people.

970
00:52:13,543 --> 00:52:16,476
You never talk to
people about 9/11?

971
00:52:16,501 --> 00:52:19,953
No, how do you stand?

972
00:52:19,955 --> 00:52:23,360
My stand on 9/11?

973
00:52:25,961 --> 00:52:29,572
Anti. That's a tragedy.

974
00:52:30,425 --> 00:52:34,019
We lost 19 of our best people.

975
00:52:36,137 --> 00:52:38,672
That is clearly a joke.

976
00:52:38,674 --> 00:52:41,192
9/11 is the worst tragedy,

977
00:52:41,192 --> 00:52:44,979
And it's not funny for
to be a joke.

978
00:52:45,004 --> 00:52:49,009
Mr. and Mrs. Gardner,
please report to the ICU.

979
00:52:49,302 --> 00:52:50,824
Mr. and Mrs. Gardner,

980
00:52:50,849 --> 00:52:52,757
OK. Ayo./
To ICU. thanks.

981
00:52:52,788 --> 00:52:54,054
Hey, can I come along?

982
00:52:54,056 --> 00:52:56,089
No./
Yes.

983
00:52:56,091 --> 00:52:58,058
Yes.

984
00:52:58,060 --> 00:52:59,564
Whatever.

985
00:53:00,371 --> 00:53:03,863
Hello, come in.
Please sit.

986
00:53:09,371 --> 00:53:11,631
I know this isn't the news you expect,

987
00:53:11,631 --> 00:53:14,830
But we are not ready to wake up
Emily from a coma.

988
00:53:15,277 --> 00:53:17,267
Why? What happened?

989
00:53:17,267 --> 00:53:19,312
Antibiotics don't work
as they expected,

990
00:53:19,314 --> 00:53:20,914
And we don't want to take risks,

991
00:53:20,916 --> 00:53:24,023
So tomorrow morning we will do
the surgical removal of the infection.

992
00:53:24,023 --> 00:53:28,968
Wait a minute, Dr. Spellman told us if the antibiotics would work.

993
00:53:29,024 --> 00:53:31,521
Right. / He said nothing
about the operation.

994
00:53:31,521 --> 00:53:33,523
So what does that mean?
What kind of operation?

995
00:53:33,548 --> 00:53:36,377
It is called Thoracentesis.
That's a normal procedure.

996
00:53:36,377 --> 00:53:39,792
We will enter through between ribs and remove the infection.

997
00:53:39,817 --> 00:53:41,092
How do you spell it?

998
00:53:41,092 --> 00:53:42,502
What's the name?
What is the last part?

999
00:53:42,504 --> 00:53:43,802
Thora... /
And the infection...

1000
00:53:43,804 --> 00:53:45,102
In lung- pulmon./
"Thora" what?

1001
00:53:45,104 --> 00:53:48,810
What is that? /
Thoracentesis. C-e-n-t-e-s-i-s.

1002
00:53:48,835 --> 00:53:52,229
What are the risks? / Low./
They usually do this? / Yes.

1003
00:53:52,254 --> 00:53:55,315
My advice for you is that you
should go home,

1004
00:53:55,340 --> 00:53:59,105
Look for something to eat
and try to calm down.

1005
00:54:06,479 --> 00:54:09,979
Visit www.Solaire99.cc
Trusted Secure Online Gambling Agent

1006
00:54:10,003 --> 00:54:13,503
BBM: 2C09385E
LINE: SOLAIRE99

1007
00:54:13,527 --> 00:54:17,027
Wechat: CS1_SOLAIRE99
Whatsapp: +66634622578

1008
00:54:26,152 --> 00:54:28,792
He lets the lights on.

1009
00:54:29,363 --> 00:54:31,844
My favorite sweater.

1010
00:54:36,758 --> 00:54:39,225
I will do research. /
Hey.

1011
00:54:39,227 --> 00:54:41,454
That's the book I gave
to him.

1012
00:54:41,479 --> 00:54:42,872
No, I gave it to him.

1013
00:54:42,872 --> 00:54:46,966
You bring a small notebook
from a doctor?

1014
00:54:46,968 --> 00:54:48,924
This is the book I gave him.

1015
00:54:48,924 --> 00:54:50,370
I will clean the room
Emily for a moment.

1016
00:54:50,372 --> 00:54:51,805
No, I remember.

1017
00:54:51,807 --> 00:54:53,700
I met him at Falafel Place,

1018
00:54:53,725 --> 00:54:57,443
Then we went to a bookstore that was rarely open, then I bought it.

1019
00:54:57,445 --> 00:54:59,546
You're not the only person who gave him something.

1020
00:54:59,548 --> 00:55:00,880
What's with you?

1021
00:55:00,880 --> 00:55:03,316
I'm tired of you thinking you're the only one who gives him something.

1022
00:55:03,318 --> 00:55:05,952
I gave him the book.
See the article.

1023
00:55:05,954 --> 00:55:08,803
No, that's ridiculous.

1024
00:55:39,327 --> 00:55:41,521
Hey, Kumail./
Hey.

1025
00:55:41,523 --> 00:55:45,312
Hey. Sorry. I didn't mean
to surprise you.

1026
00:55:45,337 --> 00:55:47,277
I just want to know, can we do something?

1027
00:55:47,302 --> 00:55:51,264
Do you have family games? /
What is a "family game"?

1028
00:55:51,266 --> 00:55:53,399
Card games. Scrabble.

1029
00:55:53,401 --> 00:55:55,201
Do you like word games?

1030
00:55:55,203 --> 00:55:58,571
I've never... / Have you ever played
words that you can't accept?

1031
00:55:58,573 --> 00:56:00,240
How do you do it?

1032
00:56:00,242 --> 00:56:03,386
Basically you try
find words...

1033
00:56:03,411 --> 00:56:06,246
The real word that can't be
rhymes.

1034
00:56:06,248 --> 00:56:08,569
Then then... /
Stonehenge.

1035
00:56:09,663 --> 00:56:13,517
Well, you can win.
That clearly wins.

1036
00:56:13,517 --> 00:56:15,955
I don't play board games.
I play...

1037
00:56:15,957 --> 00:56:18,024
I play console games. /
That's the problem.

1038
00:56:18,026 --> 00:56:19,592
Everyone now
plays Nintendo.

1039
00:56:19,594 --> 00:56:22,743
Console game. Something.
Electronic. $ 1,000.

1040
00:56:22,768 --> 00:56:25,216
When I'm small, only
chalk and sidewalks,

1041
00:56:25,241 --> 00:56:26,673
And that's your entertainment.

1042
00:56:26,698 --> 00:56:28,738
Frog jump.
Tic-Tac-Toe.

1043
00:56:28,763 --> 00:56:30,524
Throw chalk at Jimmy.

1044
00:56:30,549 --> 00:56:32,205
That's it. That's three games.

1045
00:56:32,207 --> 00:56:33,570
Jimmy real person?

1046
00:56:33,570 --> 00:56:35,942
Yes, there is no Jimmy specifically.

1047
00:56:35,967 --> 00:56:38,511
Whoever gets hit by the
chalk, he is Jimmy.

1048
00:56:40,119 --> 00:56:43,506
I just tried to find
know what to do.

1049
00:56:43,531 --> 00:56:46,552
Tonight I can't.
I really want to, but...

1050
00:56:46,554 --> 00:56:48,621
I'm actually...

1051
00:56:48,623 --> 00:56:50,623
I'm actually there
tonight,

1052
00:56:50,625 --> 00:56:52,639
That's an industrial term that
we use...

1053
00:56:52,664 --> 00:56:54,661
... when we do
there are shows, so...

1054
00:56:54,663 --> 00:56:59,232
Really? / Yes.
Montreal Comedy Festival will be held

1055
00:56:59,234 --> 00:57:02,808
And I actually became
the main star tonight, so...

1056
00:57:02,808 --> 00:57:05,490
I should go. /
Wow. That is good.

1057
00:57:05,515 --> 00:57:09,409
I haven't been to comedy clubs since
years & 80s, right?

1058
00:57:09,411 --> 00:57:11,876
Rita Rudner in Caroline's.
Remember that, baby?

1059
00:57:11,901 --> 00:57:16,800
Gosh. Pleural effusion empyema.

1060
00:57:16,825 --> 00:57:19,393
Maybe we should go
to see the Kumail show.

1061
00:57:19,418 --> 00:57:21,938
What do you think?
That will be fun?

1062
00:57:21,963 --> 00:57:24,206
These photos are horrible.

1063
00:57:24,206 --> 00:57:26,592
Okay, listen, why don't we go to the comedy club with him?

1064
00:57:26,594 --> 00:57:28,743
And this will divert our minds now.

1065
00:57:28,768 --> 00:57:31,064
I don't want to divert my mind, Terry.

1066
00:57:31,066 --> 00:57:33,847
Our daughter will be in surgery tomorrow. /
Please.

1067
00:57:33,847 --> 00:57:35,635
That is true. /
Please, listen...

1068
00:57:35,637 --> 00:57:37,736
I need transfer.

1069
00:57:37,736 --> 00:57:40,807
Then you go. /
I want you to come with me.

1070
00:57:40,807 --> 00:57:43,276
I don't want to go alone.

1071
00:57:43,278 --> 00:57:45,151
OK.

1072
00:57:45,151 --> 00:57:48,381
But I bring my iPad. /
The ticket is up.

1073
00:57:48,383 --> 00:57:52,760
I should say that before
you agree to everything.

1074
00:57:52,760 --> 00:57:54,253
Tickets sold out
quickly.

1075
00:57:54,255 --> 00:57:57,100
They were surprised how
the speed was sold out.

1076
00:57:57,100 --> 00:57:58,954
You can bring us in.

1077
00:57:58,954 --> 00:58:01,125
You're the main star, right?
That's what you said.

1078
00:58:01,127 --> 00:58:03,196
If you are the main star, you can
enter two more people, right?

1079
00:58:03,198 --> 00:58:05,365
That is true. /
Yes.

1080
00:58:05,367 --> 00:58:07,932
We will sit behind.
No problem.

1081
00:58:07,957 --> 00:58:09,435
Do they have food there?

1082
00:58:09,437 --> 00:58:12,338
Yes, they have waffles
fried and...

1083
00:58:12,340 --> 00:58:13,738
Yes.

1084
00:58:15,842 --> 00:58:18,244
The hospital also has
fried waffles. / True.

1085
00:58:19,966 --> 00:58:22,615
I actually never
to Pakistan.

1086
00:58:22,617 --> 00:58:24,304
My parents moved here
for a graduate school,

1087
00:58:24,304 --> 00:58:26,261
Then they settled here.

1088
00:58:26,286 --> 00:58:28,358
I never even
to Canada.

1089
00:58:30,231 --> 00:58:35,194
When did Kumail come? /
He will come. Right, Naveed?

1090
00:58:35,196 --> 00:58:36,907
Jam.

1091
00:58:36,907 --> 00:58:40,910
I heard severe traffic jams on Dan Ryan's toll road.

1092
00:58:40,935 --> 00:58:42,368
That's weird, because... /
You know, rush hour.

1093
00:58:42,370 --> 00:58:45,642
I came here through Dan Ryan's highway.

1094
00:58:47,859 --> 00:58:54,047
What is your sister's favorite music
your father to dance?

1095
00:58:54,049 --> 00:58:56,082
Emily's parents are here.
Aunty...

1096
00:58:56,084 --> 00:58:59,217
Tonight? Why?
Because it's not "aunt." But "Auntie."

1097
00:58:59,219 --> 00:59:01,087
All right, forget it  Does anyone come from
from outside the city?

1098
00:59:01,089 --> 00:59:03,622
Well, there are a few.

1099
00:59:04,225 --> 00:59:06,019
What is your name, sir?

1100
00:59:06,019 --> 00:59:07,794
Terry./
Terry. And...

1101
00:59:07,796 --> 00:59:10,913
Gosh. That's Emily's father.

1102
00:59:10,938 --> 00:59:12,888
What is Cloth?
Terry-Cloth?

1103
00:59:12,913 --> 00:59:15,360
That's Beth./Beth.
It's close enough.

1104
00:59:16,026 --> 00:59:18,538
Why did he do this? /
Terry-Beth,

1105
00:59:18,538 --> 00:59:20,262
Where are you from? /
We are from North Carolina.

1106
00:59:20,262 --> 00:59:23,372
North Carolina.

1107
00:59:23,372 --> 00:59:25,678
Tar Heel State.

1108
00:59:25,680 --> 00:59:27,106
Stop. Stop.
His house is "Krispy Kreme Donuts."

1109
00:59:27,130 --> 00:59:29,083
What brings you to Chicago?

1110
00:59:29,084 --> 00:59:31,259
Our daughter is in a coma.

1111
00:59:31,284 --> 00:59:33,788
How...
Where are you from?

1112
00:59:39,293 --> 00:59:42,095
Alright, it's already night.
I should go.

1113
00:59:44,184 --> 00:59:47,229
Sit down. He will come./
Wait a minute.

1114
00:59:47,229 --> 00:59:48,589


1115
00:59:48,589 --> 00:59:50,703
I think I should contact him.
I will contact him directly.

1116
00:59:50,705 --> 00:59:52,405
Hello? Kum-beta?

1117
00:59:52,407 --> 00:59:54,173
What do you mean,
"who is calling?"

1118
00:59:54,175 --> 00:59:55,775
This is your father.

1119
00:59:55,777 --> 00:59:57,407
OK.

1120
00:59:57,407 --> 00:59:59,112
He will come soon.

1121
00:59:59,114 --> 01:00:01,852
Naveed. I pretend to call.
Did you contact him?

1122
01:00:01,897 --> 01:00:04,282
Hundreds of times.
There is no response.

1123
01:00:04,282 --> 01:00:07,381
I think I have to clarify something.

1124
01:00:07,522 --> 01:00:10,431
I can understand what you are talking about.

1125
01:00:11,022 --> 01:00:14,336
I thought you said no
ever to Pakistan.

1126
01:00:14,336 --> 01:00:18,377
I said I never went there,
but we spoke Urdu at home.

1127
01:00:19,260 --> 01:00:23,947
For people who have never been to Pakistan.
you speak Urdu very well.

1128
01:00:23,947 --> 01:00:25,205
Thank you.

1129
01:00:25,272 --> 01:00:26,938
Do you want to sing?

1130
01:00:37,843 --> 01:00:39,898
I want to name my child
Void (empty)...

1131
01:00:39,923 --> 01:00:43,238
... so he can't withdraw
check his salary.

1132
01:00:44,005 --> 01:00:46,907
"Sorry, sir, here is written & apos; Blank & apos ;."

1133
01:00:46,932 --> 01:00:49,183
"But that's my name."

1134
01:00:49,183 --> 01:00:52,403
"Goddamn you, Dad!"

1135
01:00:52,922 --> 01:00:55,748
I work at the second floor bank.

1136
01:00:56,280 --> 01:01:00,008
In this imaginary scenario. /
Come back to Isis!

1137
01:01:02,399 --> 01:01:04,377
Toasted bread is a very strange food.

1138
01:01:04,377 --> 01:01:06,295
Did you say just now? /
You put bread...

1139
01:01:06,320 --> 01:01:07,661
... then you make it... /
Come on. That's nothing.

1140
01:01:07,686 --> 01:01:11,027
I said he should go back to Isis.

1141
01:01:12,231 --> 01:01:15,821
Toasted bread the only food... /
No, it's a confusing position.

1142
01:01:15,823 --> 01:01:18,085
Do you want Isis to get
more people?

1143
01:01:18,085 --> 01:01:20,210
No, I mean... /
Guess what, everything,

1144
01:01:20,235 --> 01:01:21,755
We find Isis recruiters here.

1145
01:01:21,755 --> 01:01:24,430
Okay, glad we can
finish it.

1146
01:01:24,432 --> 01:01:25,965
Toasted bread like...

1147
01:01:25,967 --> 01:01:27,571
What's wrong with him that makes you say that?

1148
01:01:27,571 --> 01:01:29,500
I think we know what the answer is. I do not...

1149
01:01:29,500 --> 01:01:30,709
Mom, I'm not talking to you.

1150
01:01:30,734 --> 01:01:32,277
What's wrong with him? /
We don't have to do this.

1151
01:01:32,277 --> 01:01:33,495
We know how to finally...

1152
01:01:33,495 --> 01:01:36,082
Because of its appearance.

1153
01:01:36,411 --> 01:01:38,776
That ./
It's like saying...

1154
01:01:38,801 --> 01:01:41,580
... if all the bastard men who are wearing a janapada club hat...

1155
01:01:41,580 --> 01:01:44,422
... and Hawaiian shirts have
small penis and creases.

1156
01:01:44,422 --> 01:01:47,386
OK. actually, Beth,

1157
01:01:47,388 --> 01:01:49,522
This is the worst way for you
find out, but he is right.

1158
01:01:49,524 --> 01:01:51,824
I am actually a terrorist.

1159
01:01:51,826 --> 01:01:55,758
I am only a single comedy as a
impersonator.

1160
01:01:56,609 --> 01:01:57,857
Fuck you.

1161
01:01:57,882 --> 01:02:01,492
First, very smart.
What...?

1162
01:02:01,492 --> 01:02:03,803
Do you write it at home?

1163
01:02:05,306 --> 01:02:07,551
Toasted bread is very strange... /
Fuck you!

1164
01:02:07,551 --> 01:02:09,423
Fuck you! /
No, fuck you!

1165
01:02:09,423 --> 01:02:12,191
You're a bitch, you know?! /
Fuck you!

1166
01:02:15,883 --> 01:02:18,384
No... Listen...

1167
01:02:18,386 --> 01:02:20,198
I will kill you!

1168
01:02:20,198 --> 01:02:22,661
What is your telephone number?

1169
01:02:25,049 --> 01:02:28,027
Sorry, everyone. Sorry.

1170
01:02:28,472 --> 01:02:32,074
Actually I'm not
apologizing,

1171
01:02:32,099 --> 01:02:35,268
Because you are a very bad person.

1172
01:02:35,270 --> 01:02:37,870
I don't want to beat you up
in front of everyone.

1173
01:02:37,872 --> 01:02:39,739
Yes, that's true.

1174
01:02:39,741 --> 01:02:42,141
I have levels, bastards.
Understand?

1175
01:02:42,166 --> 01:02:46,108
This elevator will drop down,
base of bastard!

1176
01:02:56,114 --> 01:02:58,315
I will make tea.

1177
01:03:00,136 --> 01:03:02,595
Actually, I will
open a wine bottle.

1178
01:03:03,122 --> 01:03:05,904
Actually, does Emily
have whiskey?

1179
01:03:05,904 --> 01:03:07,620
On top of the fridge.

1180
01:03:08,757 --> 01:03:12,161
Cubs look good, huh?

1181
01:03:12,161 --> 01:03:14,640
I don't know anything
about baseball.

1182
01:03:14,642 --> 01:03:16,309
Really?

1183
01:03:16,311 --> 01:03:18,742
I'm really asking
sorry about that.

1184
01:03:18,948 --> 01:03:20,777
That...

1185
01:03:22,277 --> 01:03:24,439
I lost control.

1186
01:03:24,464 --> 01:03:27,272
I think it's sexy. /
Me too.

1187
01:03:27,754 --> 01:03:29,488
Not the actual section,

1188
01:03:29,490 --> 01:03:34,393
But sexy is cool,
isn't a naughty section.

1189
01:03:35,104 --> 01:03:37,391
I won't say
"sexy" again.

1190
01:03:37,416 --> 01:03:39,727
Do you want to find something to eat?

1191
01:03:39,727 --> 01:03:41,224
I know you have a formula.

1192
01:03:41,224 --> 01:03:43,049
I've been to some
shows.

1193
01:03:43,049 --> 01:03:45,834
Is that always the case? /
Like tonight?

1194
01:03:45,859 --> 01:03:49,742
No, usually another mother
will help me.

1195
01:03:49,744 --> 01:03:51,824
I'm kidding. No, that's...

1196
01:03:51,824 --> 01:03:54,038
That's not always the case.
I will stop if it's always like that.

1197
01:03:54,038 --> 01:03:56,319
I have a joke. /
No. Terry, don't.

1198
01:03:56,319 --> 01:03:58,818
Terry is as funny as
farting at a funeral.

1199
01:03:58,820 --> 01:04:01,954
No. This is funny. Very funny.

1200
01:04:01,956 --> 01:04:05,975
OK. OK.
Giraffes enter the bar,

1201
01:04:06,000 --> 01:04:11,032
Then he told the bartender,
"Give me highballs."

1202
01:04:13,039 --> 01:04:14,500
You understand, & apos; right?

1203
01:04:14,502 --> 01:04:16,184
Is that the end of the joke?

1204
01:04:16,209 --> 01:04:17,623
Yes, of course. /
It's all the jokes?

1205
01:04:17,623 --> 01:04:19,638
That's a joke.
That's the beauty.

1206
01:04:19,640 --> 01:04:21,704
I think there's still more. /
But you understand?

1207
01:04:21,704 --> 01:04:24,110
He's a giraffe, he's tall,

1208
01:04:24,112 --> 01:04:29,375
So it's certain if the testicles are very high.

1209
01:04:29,400 --> 01:04:31,542
And "Highball" is a drink.
(High Testicles)

1210
01:04:31,567 --> 01:04:34,178
And you mess it up with
saying I'm not the first funny.

1211
01:04:34,203 --> 01:04:36,086
That is the cause. /
No.

1212
01:04:36,086 --> 01:04:39,041
No, that's good. I like my jokes
because it explains in detail.

1213
01:04:39,066 --> 01:04:42,183
You only attack
"Highball" me.

1214
01:04:46,467 --> 01:04:48,901
A complex solution,
feels comfortable in the mouth.

1215
01:04:48,903 --> 01:04:51,655
Good. How about you? /
My turn? / Yes.

1216
01:04:54,965 --> 01:04:56,432
Touch of fruit.

1217
01:04:56,432 --> 01:04:58,500
Good term. Fruit touch. /
Yes.

1218
01:04:58,500 --> 01:05:00,054
I'm impressed.
This must be in the front seat.

1219
01:05:00,054 --> 01:05:02,041
This is what drives a wine car.

1220
01:05:02,066 --> 01:05:06,554
Exactly. / I like wine
because of the vibration.

1221
01:05:06,827 --> 01:05:09,188
He's a little light class... Beth.

1222
01:05:09,190 --> 01:05:11,006
So is Terry. /
Come on.

1223
01:05:11,031 --> 01:05:13,517
He will sleep on the sofa
less than an hour.

1224
01:05:13,517 --> 01:05:16,034
That's nonsense.
You know that's not true.

1225
01:05:17,565 --> 01:05:20,310
You shouldn't be
tonight, or not?

1226
01:05:20,310 --> 01:05:23,713
I, stage tonight?
Yes, I'm the main star.

1227
01:05:26,332 --> 01:05:28,200
OK.

1228
01:05:29,239 --> 01:05:32,678
I'm lying to avoid
time with you.

1229
01:05:32,680 --> 01:05:37,049
Then I lie about the main
stars to impress you.

1230
01:05:37,051 --> 01:05:40,060
It doesn't work.

1231
01:05:40,060 --> 01:05:43,756
And also, I think I messed up
with your daughter.

1232
01:05:43,758 --> 01:05:46,058
Yes.

1233
01:05:46,060 --> 01:05:48,438
That's right.

1234
01:05:48,463 --> 01:05:52,064
I don't know how people are when their family is sick.

1235
01:05:52,066 --> 01:05:54,600
My uncle Lew...
He has cancer.

1236
01:05:54,602 --> 01:05:57,848
Then he has a stroke,
then a heart attack.

1237
01:05:57,873 --> 01:05:59,676
Then the cancer recurs.

1238
01:05:59,701 --> 01:06:02,784
But you know what killed him? /
Cancer? / Car accident.

1239
01:06:02,809 --> 01:06:04,985
We thought it might attack
heart while he was driving,

1240
01:06:05,010 --> 01:06:08,881
And he still has cancer.
Do you know?

1241
01:06:08,883 --> 01:06:11,250
He eats
sprouts for the rest of his life.

1242
01:06:11,252 --> 01:06:14,553
Do not eat yellow
eggs for 30 years.

1243
01:06:18,860 --> 01:06:21,547
Somehow I will
sleep tonight.

1244
01:06:22,284 --> 01:06:23,963
You want to stress out
by eating?

1245
01:06:23,963 --> 01:06:25,831
Of course.

1246
01:06:26,773 --> 01:06:29,101
Gosh./
I know.

1247
01:06:29,103 --> 01:06:31,737
"Most Considered."

1248
01:06:31,739 --> 01:06:33,639
Wait a minute.

1249
01:06:33,641 --> 01:06:36,242
There's more. See.

1250
01:06:36,244 --> 01:06:41,580
Photo of a legendary burial model. /
Gosh.

1251
01:06:44,803 --> 01:06:48,557
I laughed out loud when
saw this and he got mad at me.

1252
01:06:48,582 --> 01:06:51,004
You will wake him up. /
Are you kidding me?

1253
01:06:51,029 --> 01:06:53,959
He really slept soundly.
Hey, Terry!

1254
01:06:54,389 --> 01:06:56,217
How did you and Terry meet?

1255
01:06:56,242 --> 01:07:00,065
I'm studying at the University of East Carolina.

1256
01:07:00,067 --> 01:07:02,924
And I'm at the waiting table,

1257
01:07:02,949 --> 01:07:04,396
And we met at this coffee shop.

1258
01:07:04,421 --> 01:07:07,243
I wait for it
and I like her hair.

1259
01:07:08,381 --> 01:07:10,474
He was already a teacher at that time.

1260
01:07:10,499 --> 01:07:14,622
A thick New York accent that I never met.

1261
01:07:14,647 --> 01:07:16,148
That's really wrong for me.

1262
01:07:16,150 --> 01:07:18,625
So, naturally, we fall in love.

1263
01:07:18,650 --> 01:07:20,953
My family doesn't agree with him.

1264
01:07:20,955 --> 01:07:23,667
We are all military people.
Army pilot.

1265
01:07:23,667 --> 01:07:25,157
All my brothers play football.

1266
01:07:25,159 --> 01:07:27,259
Terry can't even change tires.

1267
01:07:27,261 --> 01:07:29,929
My father is very angry with me,

1268
01:07:29,931 --> 01:07:32,302
He broke all the
plates of restaurants we had.

1269
01:07:32,327 --> 01:07:36,077
In the past, when you went to the gas station,

1270
01:07:36,102 --> 01:07:37,770
And filling up your gas until it's full,
You get a restaurant plate.

1271
01:07:37,772 --> 01:07:40,184
But sometimes it's a glass,
bottles of sauce.

1272
01:07:40,209 --> 01:07:43,042
It takes a year for
to complete the set.

1273
01:07:43,044 --> 01:07:45,678
And Terry stays there.

1274
01:07:45,680 --> 01:07:47,346
Until finally...

1275
01:07:47,348 --> 01:07:49,949
... they all softened.

1276
01:07:49,951 --> 01:07:52,374
They just soften up?

1277
01:07:52,374 --> 01:07:56,188
What about? / After that
a lot of messy dinners.

1278
01:07:56,821 --> 01:07:59,692
How did your parents meet, Kumail?

1279
01:07:59,694 --> 01:08:01,827
We do matchmaking,
as you know,

1280
01:08:01,829 --> 01:08:05,512
Then flocked away
together watching a movie,

1281
01:08:05,537 --> 01:08:09,768
But it's actually been arranged
so my mother and father can meet.

1282
01:08:09,768 --> 01:08:12,137
What films did they watch?

1283
01:08:12,139 --> 01:08:14,673
I don't know.

1284
01:08:14,675 --> 01:08:16,842
I never ask.

1285
01:08:19,149 --> 01:08:22,716
He's amazing, you know? /
Yes.

1286
01:08:22,741 --> 01:08:24,779
I know.

1287
01:08:24,804 --> 01:08:27,219
I feel sure
with surgery.

1288
01:08:27,221 --> 01:08:30,493
Me too. These doctors
know what they are doing.

1289
01:08:30,518 --> 01:08:32,992
They don't know.

1290
01:08:32,994 --> 01:08:35,704
They only sweeten it
like the others.

1291
01:08:49,644 --> 01:08:52,111
Damn.

1292
01:09:00,833 --> 01:09:05,124
Hey, this is me. I tried
making Pakistani dishes...

1293
01:09:05,126 --> 01:09:08,727
... to give you a surprise,
but I'm a bad chef,

1294
01:09:08,729 --> 01:09:11,810
Or all food
Pakistan is bad.

1295
01:09:11,810 --> 01:09:14,070
I don't know. Dah!

1296
01:09:18,004 --> 01:09:20,839
Hey, this is me.
If you want to come...

1297
01:09:20,841 --> 01:09:23,586
... and kiss me
for two seconds,

1298
01:09:23,586 --> 01:09:27,893
I will want that
tonight. Okay, bro.

1299
01:09:31,113 --> 01:09:34,451
Hey, this is me. Do you want
to meet in the gallery?

1300
01:09:34,476 --> 01:09:37,222
Gosh!

1301
01:09:37,224 --> 01:09:39,619
Gosh! A bird
has just hit my head!

1302
01:09:39,619 --> 01:09:41,483
Gosh, I'm not kidding!

1303
01:09:42,993 --> 01:09:46,765
I'll call you back.
Gosh, are you okay?

1304
01:09:51,742 --> 01:09:54,814
Infection around the lungs
has been removed.

1305
01:09:54,814 --> 01:09:56,428
We should be able to immediately
realize him from a coma.

1306
01:09:56,453 --> 01:09:58,788
Gosh!

1307
01:09:59,624 --> 01:10:00,979
How fast?

1308
01:10:00,981 --> 01:10:03,148
He should be aware
before tomorrow morning.

1309
01:10:03,150 --> 01:10:06,769
We will also test pleural
fluid from Thoracentesis...

1310
01:10:06,769 --> 01:10:09,454
... to create strategies
antibiotics aimed.

1311
01:10:09,479 --> 01:10:13,234
So this is good news? /
This is very good news.

1312
01:10:13,259 --> 01:10:16,328
We will take care of him for a few days, then he is allowed to go home.

1313
01:10:16,330 --> 01:10:19,331
He's a warrior, isn't he? /
Yes.

1314
01:10:21,963 --> 01:10:23,391
Mother is very worried.

1315
01:10:23,416 --> 01:10:25,285
We saw on the news
the slipped train...

1316
01:10:25,285 --> 01:10:27,740
... and we think you're in the
the train and killed.

1317
01:10:27,742 --> 01:10:29,562
No one was killed
on the train, Mom.

1318
01:10:29,562 --> 01:10:31,054
Do they see under the train?

1319
01:10:31,054 --> 01:10:33,011
Where were you last night?
What are you doing?

1320
01:10:33,013 --> 01:10:35,112
None.
I didn't do anything.

1321
01:10:35,112 --> 01:10:37,369
Kumail?

1322
01:10:37,394 --> 01:10:40,715
OK, I'll tell you. /
Say. / I...

1323
01:10:40,755 --> 01:10:43,722
I learn for LSAT.

1324
01:10:43,854 --> 01:10:46,358
Really? /
Yes.

1325
01:10:46,360 --> 01:10:51,479
I register and if I graduate, I will go to law school...

1326
01:10:51,504 --> 01:10:55,534
... then become a lawyer
and do the law.

1327
01:10:57,075 --> 01:10:59,171
Let me see who it is.

1328
01:10:59,173 --> 01:11:00,715
Seriously, Dad?

1329
01:11:00,715 --> 01:11:02,775
What? / Dad says no one will come, this is just...

1330
01:11:02,777 --> 01:11:04,343
This is just us./
Kumail, you know this person...

1331
01:11:04,345 --> 01:11:07,185
"People say Sam!"

1332
01:11:07,210 --> 01:11:08,811
Do you know him? /
Yes, I know him.

1333
01:11:08,836 --> 01:11:11,069
He should appear
on Saturday Night Live./SNL.

1334
01:11:11,069 --> 01:11:12,203
People don't say "Sam."
They say "Greetings."

1335
01:11:12,203 --> 01:11:14,286
Everyone, do you remember Khadija?

1336
01:11:14,288 --> 01:11:17,463
He just stopped by. He happened to be near here.

1337
01:11:17,463 --> 01:11:21,126
And this is his parents,
Rahan and Tina.

1338
01:11:21,128 --> 01:11:23,279
They also just stop by.

1339
01:11:23,279 --> 01:11:25,687
Greetings.
_ Peace is also for you.

1340
01:11:25,689 --> 01:11:29,519
Then he came to America.
He has three children.

1341
01:11:29,605 --> 01:11:34,343
Actually, he left two
children in Pakistan when he came...

1342
01:11:35,295 --> 01:11:37,379
I've come to so many
meetings,

1343
01:11:37,379 --> 01:11:40,821
And I never found
in common with them.

1344
01:11:40,846 --> 01:11:43,820
When my co-worker complained
me about dating,

1345
01:11:43,845 --> 01:11:47,419
I want to slam them.
They don't know anything.

1346
01:11:47,421 --> 01:11:50,556
Right.
My mother said I became...

1347
01:11:50,558 --> 01:11:54,407
... like an apple that is bruised
at the bottom of a bucket of apples.

1348
01:11:54,407 --> 01:11:56,195
That's not true. /
Yes.

1349
01:11:56,197 --> 01:11:58,693
That's right. /
That's not true.

1350
01:11:59,318 --> 01:12:02,220
Do you want to meet sometime?

1351
01:12:02,245 --> 01:12:04,203
Without our parents.

1352
01:12:04,205 --> 01:12:06,003
Have you been to a cat cafe?

1353
01:12:06,003 --> 01:12:08,854
The cat comes to you and
nests in your lap,

1354
01:12:08,879 --> 01:12:11,210
Then you just stroked them.

1355
01:12:11,212 --> 01:12:13,545
I don't think that's a good idea.

1356
01:12:13,547 --> 01:12:16,216
You don't like cats?

1357
01:12:16,241 --> 01:12:21,186
I mean, I don't think that's a good idea for us to meet again.

1358
01:12:21,188 --> 01:12:25,353
That's not you.
You're so charming.

1359
01:12:25,378 --> 01:12:29,428
I just can't do this match with anyone.

1360
01:12:30,096 --> 01:12:32,331
Then why did you meet
with me?

1361
01:12:32,333 --> 01:12:35,634
That's not my idea.

1362
01:12:40,396 --> 01:12:42,898
I'm really tired.

1363
01:12:42,923 --> 01:12:49,381
Have you ever wanted to have a relationship
so you can finally feel relaxed?

1364
01:12:49,383 --> 01:12:51,884
I'm sorry.

1365
01:12:54,420 --> 01:12:56,922
You deserve more
better than me.

1366
01:12:57,602 --> 01:13:00,192
People always tell me what is appropriate for me.

1367
01:13:00,194 --> 01:13:02,931
That's nonsense.

1368
01:13:02,931 --> 01:13:06,519
And stop asking
sorry for everything.

1369
01:13:08,002 --> 01:13:10,164
I will go.

1370
01:13:11,265 --> 01:13:13,438
And you know,
I watch "X-Files"...

1371
01:13:13,440 --> 01:13:17,769
... three episodes...
And it's a bad event.

1372
01:13:29,929 --> 01:13:33,476
They should call this website
"Everything is cancer, dot-com."

1373
01:13:33,494 --> 01:13:37,496
Whatever symptoms you enter, it's a possibility of cancer.

1374
01:13:37,498 --> 01:13:40,098
Hiccups of cancer.
Come on.

1375
01:13:40,123 --> 01:13:42,095
Hiccups are becoming
fun again now.

1376
01:13:42,120 --> 01:13:46,360
Do you know, this is the 17th best hospital in Chicago?

1377
01:13:46,360 --> 01:13:49,341
Really? From how much? /
I don't know.

1378
01:13:49,343 --> 01:13:52,183
But Northwestern is number one.

1379
01:13:52,208 --> 01:13:55,213
How do they give value,
what is the method? / I don't know, Terry.

1380
01:13:55,215 --> 01:13:57,516
But rank 17 is bad.

1381
01:13:57,518 --> 01:13:59,518
That's not good.
Except the sample size...

1382
01:13:59,520 --> 01:14:01,153
It all depends.

1383
01:14:01,155 --> 01:14:02,893
This, see the comments.

1384
01:14:02,918 --> 01:14:05,590
This is why I don't like the Internet, because it's never good.

1385
01:14:05,592 --> 01:14:08,652
You search the Internet,
and they hate "Forrest Gump."

1386
01:14:08,677 --> 01:14:10,857
That's the best movie ever.

1387
01:14:12,628 --> 01:14:14,404
I know.

1388
01:14:14,429 --> 01:14:17,263
This isn't all that long.

1389
01:14:17,390 --> 01:14:19,371
About three hours maybe.

1390
01:14:19,373 --> 01:14:22,304
Hey, I...
Alright, I have to go.

1391
01:14:23,376 --> 01:14:24,576
Terry, hi ./
Hey.

1392
01:14:24,578 --> 01:14:28,046
Can we talk? / Yes.

1393
01:14:28,048 --> 01:14:29,982
We have received the results of the biopsy.

1394
01:14:29,984 --> 01:14:32,317
Unfortunately the results are not convincing.

1395
01:14:32,319 --> 01:14:35,351
We are worried because this too...

1396
01:14:37,057 --> 01:14:39,191
Wait, what does that mean?

1397
01:14:39,193 --> 01:14:41,826
That means this is aggressive.
That means that...

1398
01:14:51,130 --> 01:14:55,873
They don't know what the disease is
or where the virus came from,

1399
01:14:55,898 --> 01:14:57,993
Bacteria, whatever they are. /
But they have released the infection,

1400
01:14:58,018 --> 01:14:59,602
So it shouldn't be a problem. /
I know. That's what I said.

1401
01:14:59,627 --> 01:15:02,208
But the vital sign is not normal.
And now they say...

1402
01:15:02,208 --> 01:15:05,680
... the infection is spreading.
It attacks the kidneys now.

1403
01:15:05,705 --> 01:15:07,958
But the kidneys are very far from the lungs. /
I know.

1404
01:15:07,983 --> 01:15:10,082
It's an aggressive infection...

1405
01:15:10,107 --> 01:15:13,091
... and they say all they can do now is find out...

1406
01:15:13,093 --> 01:15:15,776
... what is this mystery disease?

1407
01:15:18,927 --> 01:15:20,632
I contact Northwestern.

1408
01:15:20,634 --> 01:15:22,300
Wait a minute... /
Terry, my goodness...

1409
01:15:22,302 --> 01:15:24,336
I think we should talk about... /
Shut up.

1410
01:15:24,338 --> 01:15:27,013
I'm sick of this, Terry.
We leave here.

1411
01:15:27,038 --> 01:15:30,093
They are in the middle of the
of the entire elimination process.

1412
01:15:30,118 --> 01:15:32,402
You mean Northwestern can't
use that information...

1413
01:15:32,426 --> 01:15:34,568
... and continue the research?
This place is very bad.

1414
01:15:34,593 --> 01:15:36,849
I'm sorry.
Anna, can I ask for that?

1415
01:15:36,849 --> 01:15:39,151
Can you pause?
They're doctors.

1416
01:15:39,153 --> 01:15:42,156
You act as if you understand. /
Not all doctors are the same. You don't understand.

1417
01:15:42,156 --> 01:15:43,905
I can't find my cellphone,

1418
01:15:43,905 --> 01:15:45,834
You carry a cellphone? / Yes. /
Don't give it to him.

1419
01:15:45,834 --> 01:15:47,159
Don't...
You don't need a cellphone.

1420
01:15:47,161 --> 01:15:49,003
You don't have to contact
anyone at this time.

1421
01:15:49,028 --> 01:15:51,068
They are working on it.
They're experts here, and...

1422
01:15:51,093 --> 01:15:52,697
I believe them./One, five... /
That's very good,

1423
01:15:52,699 --> 01:15:54,722
But I don't...
Can you unlock the key?

1424
01:15:54,747 --> 01:15:57,469
There is a reason they are ranked 17
and Northwestern ranks 1.

1425
01:15:57,471 --> 01:15:59,538
And that's not because people
believe them. thanks.

1426
01:15:59,540 --> 01:16:02,240
You think you're smarter than me.
You say important sentences.

1427
01:16:02,242 --> 01:16:04,381
But you're wrong.

1428
01:16:07,927 --> 01:16:09,369
I don't think I'm
smarter than you.

1429
01:16:09,369 --> 01:16:11,021
You just don't think
you're as smart as me.

1430
01:16:11,046 --> 01:16:14,813
That's not my fault. /
Right, this has never been your fault.

1431
01:16:14,838 --> 01:16:20,646
All my mistakes. There are some things that are really your fault.

1432
01:16:21,811 --> 01:16:24,350
That's nonsense.

1433
01:16:24,375 --> 01:16:26,621
You have to stop panicking
and calm yourself.

1434
01:16:26,621 --> 01:16:29,319
And you have to stop
being a coward.

1435
01:16:30,025 --> 01:16:31,788
Right.

1436
01:16:31,813 --> 01:16:33,619
The core of the main problem
has returned.

1437
01:16:33,644 --> 01:16:35,334
OK, can you stop?

1438
01:16:35,359 --> 01:16:39,183
I will repeat
the rest of this memory.

1439
01:16:41,599 --> 01:16:43,566
Yes, don't... Listen to me...

1440
01:17:10,680 --> 01:17:13,311
You gave him a giraffe doll. /
This is the biggest they have.

1441
01:17:13,313 --> 01:17:14,779
I don't even know
if he likes giraffes.

1442
01:17:14,781 --> 01:17:19,440
We never talked
about giraffes.

1443
01:17:20,014 --> 01:17:21,735
Hey, do you know what they do?

1444
01:17:21,760 --> 01:17:23,939
Because of them at all
don't tell us anything.

1445
01:17:23,964 --> 01:17:25,655
Like Lyme disease.

1446
01:17:25,655 --> 01:17:27,404
The girl "The Real World" has it.

1447
01:17:27,428 --> 01:17:29,775
Have you checked that? /
Yes, already.

1448
01:17:29,800 --> 01:17:31,177
He is always in pain,

1449
01:17:31,177 --> 01:17:33,732
And he made his leg injured
recently. What is Lupus?

1450
01:17:33,734 --> 01:17:36,268
Look, we've already checked everything.

1451
01:17:36,270 --> 01:17:38,470
We don't keep anything from you.

1452
01:17:38,472 --> 01:17:42,433
We only get rid of the possible
.

1453
01:17:42,458 --> 01:17:45,184
Because Beth wants to move
he to Northwestern.

1454
01:17:45,209 --> 01:17:48,480
No. Emily can't be moved.

1455
01:17:48,482 --> 01:17:50,348
The hospital will approve that,

1456
01:17:50,350 --> 01:17:53,168
Because it can release
vulnerability in their hands.

1457
01:17:53,193 --> 01:17:55,315
But we made him in
coma conditions for a reason...

1458
01:17:55,315 --> 01:17:57,068
To make it stable.

1459
01:17:57,093 --> 01:18:00,425
Moving him can
be very dangerous.

1460
01:18:00,427 --> 01:18:04,333
Believe me, he is fighting
against this, and so do we.

1461
01:18:08,321 --> 01:18:11,203
Hey, Terry, I just talked with...

1462
01:18:11,205 --> 01:18:14,508
Are you okay? /
Yes, of course.

1463
01:18:15,558 --> 01:18:17,095
I'm fine.

1464
01:18:17,120 --> 01:18:19,978
Beth goes to see Emily, so...

1465
01:18:19,980 --> 01:18:23,263
I'll wait here until
they turn me off, you know?

1466
01:18:23,288 --> 01:18:27,042
I will watch over them.

1467
01:18:31,724 --> 01:18:34,060
Do you want to sleep in my place?

1468
01:18:34,060 --> 01:18:36,795
Do you have a golf channel? /
No.

1469
01:18:36,797 --> 01:18:38,787
That's not funny, huh?

1470
01:18:38,812 --> 01:18:41,566
I don't... I think that
serious question.

1471
01:18:41,568 --> 01:18:43,268
Let's leave here.

1472
01:18:48,909 --> 01:18:50,775
So...

1473
01:18:50,777 --> 01:18:53,349
This is the place.

1474
01:18:53,374 --> 01:18:54,946
Wow.

1475
01:18:54,948 --> 01:18:57,200
This place is very bad.

1476
01:19:02,029 --> 01:19:05,607
Hey, I'm talking to
Sister Judy,

1477
01:19:05,632 --> 01:19:10,018
And he says moving
Emily is a bad idea.

1478
01:19:10,043 --> 01:19:13,808
Really? / Yes, he said
it might be dangerous.

1479
01:19:15,787 --> 01:19:19,390
Like, something... /
Yes, I hear you.

1480
01:19:21,093 --> 01:19:28,599
I'm willing to give anything to
exchange places with Emily.

1481
01:19:29,750 --> 01:19:33,451
Being a parent
is a nightmare.

1482
01:19:33,453 --> 01:19:37,589
Loving someone is just as bad.

1483
01:19:37,591 --> 01:19:39,754
Yes.

1484
01:19:39,779 --> 01:19:41,359
And...

1485
01:19:41,361 --> 01:19:46,314
I think you know the tension between Beth and me.

1486
01:19:46,748 --> 01:19:48,666
Not too.

1487
01:19:48,691 --> 01:19:51,324
That's not my business,
so I'm not trying to...

1488
01:19:51,349 --> 01:19:54,292
No, but that's what happened.

1489
01:19:54,317 --> 01:19:56,543
Very important.

1490
01:19:57,412 --> 01:20:00,679
This is late.
We should sleep.

1491
01:20:08,829 --> 01:20:11,480
I cheated on him.

1492
01:20:11,618 --> 01:20:14,659
Damn./
That's right.

1493
01:20:15,661 --> 01:20:17,495
It's only love one night.

1494
01:20:17,497 --> 01:20:20,646
All right. We met at the bar in Cincinnati.

1495
01:20:20,671 --> 01:20:23,959
They are holding a teacher conference
.

1496
01:20:23,984 --> 01:20:26,521
Who goes to the conference
math to make love?

1497
01:20:26,521 --> 01:20:28,382
Math teacher?

1498
01:20:28,407 --> 01:20:30,342
Yes.

1499
01:20:30,344 --> 01:20:32,759
I think it's sad.

1500
01:20:32,784 --> 01:20:35,013
That is the fact. /
Yes.

1501
01:20:35,015 --> 01:20:37,156
Let's talk about that tomorrow.

1502
01:20:37,181 --> 01:20:38,862
We sleep well tonight...

1503
01:20:38,887 --> 01:20:43,355
... so that tomorrow morning feels refreshed... /
The aroma is very fragrant.

1504
01:20:45,195 --> 01:20:46,936
That's also very bad.

1505
01:20:46,961 --> 01:20:50,361
As soon as I'm done...

1506
01:20:50,386 --> 01:20:53,603
I thought,
"What are you doing ?!

1507
01:20:53,628 --> 01:20:57,969
" What did you just do ?! "" What are you doing ?! "

1508
01:20:57,971 --> 01:21:01,095
You know the moment of certainty
you get right after orgasm .

1509
01:21:01,902 --> 01:21:08,729
Yes.

1510
01:21:08,881 --> 01:21:10,994
I immediately tell Beth.
I have to.

1511
01:21:11,339 --> 01:21:14,838
He is hit.

1512
01:21:16,060 --> 01:21:18,160
And now he hates me. have to hear the way he
talks about you.

1513
01:21:18,185 --> 01:21:20,625
May I ask
something to you?

1514
01:21:20,627 --> 01:21:24,829
Why did you tell him? /
I have to.

1515
01:21:24,831 --> 01:21:28,119


1516
01:21:28,635 --> 01:21:31,536


1517
01:21:33,005 --> 01:21:35,627


1518
01:21:35,627 --> 01:21:37,946


1519
01:21:38,661 --> 01:21:41,813
You talk about that? /
No more.

1520
01:21:41,815 --> 01:21:45,884
He says he forgives me,
but, no...

1521
01:21:45,886 --> 01:21:48,453
He hasn't forgiven.

1522
01:21:49,548 --> 01:21:52,109
Let me give you a suggestion, Kumail.

1523
01:21:53,948 --> 01:21:58,596
You will know who you are
want to spend the rest of your life...

1524
01:21:58,598 --> 01:22:00,598
... when you cheated on him.

1525
01:22:00,600 --> 01:22:05,284
When you cheat on him and
you feel like garbage.

1526
01:22:06,318 --> 01:22:09,098
So in order to really understand
I love someone,

1527
01:22:09,122 --> 01:22:12,125
I have to cheat on them?

1528
01:22:13,012 --> 01:22:16,078
If you say it out loud, it sounds stupid.

1529
01:22:17,049 --> 01:22:20,554
Yes, that's a bad idea.

1530
01:22:21,387 --> 01:22:25,310
Love is not easy.

1531
01:22:26,154 --> 01:22:28,319
That's why they call it love.

1532
01:22:29,063 --> 01:22:31,374
I don't understand that either. /
I know.

1533
01:22:31,399 --> 01:22:33,362
I thought I could start
saying something,

1534
01:22:33,387 --> 01:22:35,667
Then something smart
will come out.

1535
01:22:54,759 --> 01:22:56,570
Hey, did you see Terry?

1536
01:22:56,595 --> 01:22:58,459
Yes, I heard him
leave this morning.

1537
01:22:58,484 --> 01:23:00,151
I go to Subbies.
Do you want something?

1538
01:23:00,176 --> 01:23:01,509
No, I'm fine.
Thank you.

1539
01:23:01,509 --> 01:23:03,161
You don't want a hot dog?

1540
01:23:03,163 --> 01:23:04,696
Dude, it's 8:30 a.m.

1541
01:23:04,698 --> 01:23:07,428
OK. There are no hot dogs.

1542
01:23:08,969 --> 01:23:10,502
Hi.

1543
01:23:10,504 --> 01:23:12,328
Yes, please enter.

1544
01:23:13,983 --> 01:23:16,107
We just talked to
Khadija's parents.

1545
01:23:16,109 --> 01:23:18,610
What are you doing here?
What's up with you, Kumi?

1546
01:23:18,612 --> 01:23:20,122
There is nothing wrong with me.
I am sorry.

1547
01:23:20,122 --> 01:23:22,013
Sorry? That's all you say? /
Well, I'm not...

1548
01:23:22,015 --> 01:23:23,945
I'm not interested in him. /
Interested in him?

1549
01:23:23,970 --> 01:23:25,561
Yes. /
You know how difficult it is...

1550
01:23:25,586 --> 01:23:28,219
... to arrange a meeting with him?
He was craved.

1551
01:23:28,221 --> 01:23:30,054
OK, then? /
Then?

1552
01:23:30,056 --> 01:23:32,056
Can we talk about this
next time? I...

1553
01:23:32,058 --> 01:23:35,627
No, Kumi.
We are talking about this now.

1554
01:23:35,629 --> 01:23:38,251
We have sacrificed
all for you.

1555
01:23:38,276 --> 01:23:40,298
I know. Okay?

1556
01:23:40,300 --> 01:23:43,607
We leave our family.
We leave our house.

1557
01:23:43,632 --> 01:23:46,704
Mother skips birth
_ my sister's daughter.

1558
01:23:46,706 --> 01:23:51,552
My mother hasn't even met my mother for 15 years.

1559
01:23:51,577 --> 01:23:55,780
Your father, he must be a graduate school
again.

1560
01:23:55,782 --> 01:23:57,801
He must give another test.

1561
01:23:57,826 --> 01:24:00,118
Daddy was in the middle of
50 years old.

1562
01:24:00,120 --> 01:24:03,655
They are still in their 20s. They used to be
calling me Father Time.

1563
01:24:03,657 --> 01:24:06,347
Okay, I know that.

1564
01:24:06,372 --> 01:24:09,594
And I really appreciate
everything you do for me.

1565
01:24:09,596 --> 01:24:12,997
But can we discuss
about this next time?

1566
01:24:12,999 --> 01:24:16,350
Kumi, if you don't want to be a lawyer, it doesn't matter.

1567
01:24:16,375 --> 01:24:18,820
If you want to be
single comedy...

1568
01:24:18,845 --> 01:24:21,697
... and shame us as
family, no problem.

1569
01:24:21,722 --> 01:24:25,398
But one thing we ask
from you, Kumi,

1570
01:24:25,398 --> 01:24:29,220
That you become a devout Muslim
and marry a Pakistani woman!

1571
01:24:29,245 --> 01:24:32,338
Only one thing!

1572
01:24:32,503 --> 01:24:34,326
May I ask you?

1573
01:24:34,351 --> 01:24:36,177
Something that never
makes sense to me.

1574
01:24:36,202 --> 01:24:39,657
Why did you bring me here if you didn't want me to live an American life?

1575
01:24:39,659 --> 01:24:42,594
We come here, but we
pretend we are still there.

1576
01:24:42,596 --> 01:24:44,439
That's really ridiculous.

1577
01:24:44,439 --> 01:24:47,331
Don't talk to your mother like that. /
You don't care what I think.

1578
01:24:47,356 --> 01:24:49,210
You just want me to follow the rules.

1579
01:24:49,235 --> 01:24:52,787
But the rules don't make sense to me.

1580
01:24:56,742 --> 01:25:00,641
I don't pray. No.

1581
01:25:00,641 --> 01:25:03,681
I haven't prayed for
years.

1582
01:25:03,683 --> 01:25:07,285
I just go down there
and play video games.

1583
01:25:07,287 --> 01:25:08,753
You don't trust God?

1584
01:25:08,755 --> 01:25:12,256
I don't know what to do
be trusted, Dad. I do not know.

1585
01:25:14,393 --> 01:25:17,464
And I can't marry someone
who you are looking for for me.

1586
01:25:17,489 --> 01:25:20,891
Why not?

1587
01:25:21,100 --> 01:25:23,870
Because I fell in love with someone.

1588
01:25:23,895 --> 01:25:25,303
That's what happened.

1589
01:25:25,305 --> 01:25:29,407
Her name is Emily and she will become a therapist.

1590
01:25:29,409 --> 01:25:31,976
And now he is very sick.

1591
01:25:31,978 --> 01:25:33,778
But I can't say
to you.

1592
01:25:33,780 --> 01:25:37,332
That makes me sad because I can't say all that to you.

1593
01:25:39,718 --> 01:25:42,987
I really appreciate all that
you have done for me.

1594
01:25:42,989 --> 01:25:46,290
I am very, very grateful.
Really.

1595
01:25:46,292 --> 01:25:49,221
I know Islam has been very
good with you,

1596
01:25:49,246 --> 01:25:51,272
And that makes you
good people.

1597
01:25:51,297 --> 01:25:54,899
But I don't know what
must be trusted.

1598
01:25:54,901 --> 01:25:57,769
I have to find out for myself.

1599
01:25:57,771 --> 01:26:00,554
You are not my child.

1600
01:26:02,198 --> 01:26:06,344
Kumail. You're very selfish,
you don't think about our problem.

1601
01:26:06,346 --> 01:26:08,323
You don't think about Khadija,

1602
01:26:08,323 --> 01:26:11,215
Even you don't think of women who make you fall in love.

1603
01:26:11,217 --> 01:26:15,097
You think American dreams are
doing what you want...

1604
01:26:15,122 --> 01:26:17,822
... and don't think about other people's problems? You are wrong.

1605
01:26:17,824 --> 01:26:21,310
You're wrong!

1606
01:26:25,352 --> 01:26:28,891
Excuse me, please. /
What's wrong with you, man?

1607
01:26:30,135 --> 01:26:31,869
Hey.

1608
01:26:31,871 --> 01:26:34,044
I never go to the store.

1609
01:26:34,044 --> 01:26:37,541
I hear everything at the door.

1610
01:26:38,744 --> 01:26:42,432
Hey, my mother drove me because
sold marijuana when I was 16,

1611
01:26:42,457 --> 01:26:44,618
So I understand, friend.

1612
01:26:56,408 --> 01:26:57,944
Hey ./
Hey.

1613
01:26:57,944 --> 01:26:59,710
When will we talk
with Beth...

1614
01:26:59,710 --> 01:27:02,909
... the problem we are talking about? /
We will move it,

1615
01:27:02,909 --> 01:27:04,802
That's what we will do.

1616
01:27:04,804 --> 01:27:06,474
What?

1617
01:27:06,474 --> 01:27:09,140
What? We will move him. /
What are you talking about?

1618
01:27:09,142 --> 01:27:11,377
You give up? /
That's not true.

1619
01:27:11,377 --> 01:27:13,305
I don't give up, okay? /
Alright.

1620
01:27:13,305 --> 01:27:15,045
I know you don't give up,

1621
01:27:15,045 --> 01:27:18,149
You're amazing, but we talked about this
last night and we decided... / I know.

1622
01:27:18,151 --> 01:27:19,884
That's not an idea... /
We move him.

1623
01:27:19,886 --> 01:27:21,587
No. What is it.

1624
01:27:21,612 --> 01:27:22,864
I tell you what the sisters say. He's right.

1625
01:27:22,864 --> 01:27:25,720
Beth, the nurse tells me if
moving Emiliy is a bad idea.

1626
01:27:25,720 --> 01:27:27,731
Northwestern told us that it would be very good.

1627
01:27:27,731 --> 01:27:30,621
They did not see it, this nurse
saw it and she said it herself.

1628
01:27:30,621 --> 01:27:31,631
It's OK, Kumail,

1629
01:27:31,631 --> 01:27:34,165
They don't see it. /
This can't be accepted! That!

1630
01:27:34,167 --> 01:27:35,933
That... /
I got it.

1631
01:27:35,958 --> 01:27:38,353
That's a garage map.

1632
01:27:39,271 --> 01:27:40,838
Don't...

1633
01:27:40,840 --> 01:27:42,473
Wait...

1634
01:27:42,475 --> 01:27:45,941
Do you want to be responsible ?!

1635
01:27:46,446 --> 01:27:48,155
He can die!

1636
01:27:48,155 --> 01:27:52,687
Kumail, we are responsible
for whatever happens.

1637
01:27:52,687 --> 01:27:54,815
We are his parents.

1638
01:27:54,815 --> 01:27:57,281
I'm sorry,
we moved him.

1639
01:28:07,167 --> 01:28:09,875
Welcome to Quick & nos; n Hot.
Can I accept the order?

1640
01:28:09,875 --> 01:28:13,480
Yes, can I order one burger
with four pieces of cheese?

1641
01:28:13,480 --> 01:28:15,272
Four burgers.
Anything else, sir?

1642
01:28:15,272 --> 01:28:18,623
No, one burger with
four pieces of cheese!

1643
01:28:21,799 --> 01:28:25,270
One burger with four pieces... /
Sorry, we can't do that.

1644
01:28:25,270 --> 01:28:29,057
Just enter four pieces
cheese into the burger.

1645
01:28:29,057 --> 01:28:30,594
We can't do that.
There are no buttons...

1646
01:28:30,594 --> 01:28:32,290
Who is this "we", man ?!

1647
01:28:32,292 --> 01:28:34,358
Who is this "we" ?!
This is just me and you!

1648
01:28:34,360 --> 01:28:37,214
We are just people!
Listen to me!

1649
01:28:37,239 --> 01:28:44,519
Fuck this company entity!
Add four cheeses to the burger!

1650
01:28:46,371 --> 01:28:49,716
We can't do that. /
What the hell ?! You stupid!

1651
01:28:49,741 --> 01:28:52,476
Hey! Hey, look at me.

1652
01:28:52,478 --> 01:28:55,012
Because I'm human,
you're human. Look at me!

1653
01:28:55,014 --> 01:28:57,186
Look at my eyes when you
deal with me!

1654
01:28:57,211 --> 01:28:59,483
Look at me!
Please!

1655
01:28:59,485 --> 01:29:02,806
This is my first day at work.
Fuck you!

1656
01:29:12,663 --> 01:29:15,665
I will charge you
with four burgers.

1657
01:29:17,570 --> 01:29:19,203
I'm sorry.

1658
01:29:19,205 --> 01:29:22,073
Do you want to add
fries or drinks?

1659
01:29:24,143 --> 01:29:26,524
I ask for French fries.

1660
01:29:26,979 --> 01:29:28,718
I'm sorry.

1661
01:29:51,104 --> 01:29:53,488
... Your life is very dramatic.

1662
01:29:53,513 --> 01:29:56,120
Then I started
making this journal.

1663
01:29:56,120 --> 01:30:00,339
And the journal makes me
very excessive...

1664
01:30:00,364 --> 01:30:06,021
... but trying to act like I
have a cool Rock & Roll lifestyle.

1665
01:30:06,021 --> 01:30:08,319
While actually,
I'm in third grade...

1666
01:30:08,321 --> 01:30:10,054
... cry all the time.

1667
01:30:10,056 --> 01:30:13,057
Hey, friend.
Final Montreal. Are you ready?

1668
01:30:13,059 --> 01:30:16,560
Wait, are you nervous and worried before getting on the stage?

1669
01:30:16,562 --> 01:30:19,563
Yes, your own law
is like a cheap naughty woman.

1670
01:30:19,565 --> 01:30:22,460
Well, my mood
isn't good, Chris?

1671
01:30:22,460 --> 01:30:24,044
I will make the atmosphere
your heart be good.

1672
01:30:24,044 --> 01:30:26,504
Are you okay? / I'm trying to make
your mood is good!

1673
01:30:26,506 --> 01:30:28,649
Why do all
people say the same thing?

1674
01:30:28,674 --> 01:30:31,049
Yes, I decided... / Are you okay? /
Yes, I'm very good.

1675
01:30:31,049 --> 01:30:33,614
Okay, alright, I'm just
just registering you.

1676
01:30:39,013 --> 01:30:40,451
Where have you been, friend?

1677
01:30:40,453 --> 01:30:43,591
You're the next one.
OK.

1678
01:30:44,142 --> 01:30:46,743
Thank you, everyone.
I love you.

1679
01:30:48,525 --> 01:30:51,295
Hello? /
Kumail, is that you?

1680
01:30:51,297 --> 01:30:53,264
Yes. /
This is Terry.

1681
01:30:53,266 --> 01:30:56,955
Listen, we don't move him.
Doctor...

1682
01:31:14,048 --> 01:31:17,564
Have you ever heard of an HIV drug
named Cheese?

1683
01:31:17,997 --> 01:31:20,624
That's the name.
That is called Cheese.

1684
01:31:20,626 --> 01:31:23,725
I saw it on the news
and I thought,

1685
01:31:23,750 --> 01:31:26,263
"There is a new drug called Cheese."

1686
01:31:26,265 --> 01:31:29,447
"Everyone does it
in the Midwest, also children."

1687
01:31:36,079 --> 01:31:38,442
It's difficult to do
single comedy...

1688
01:31:38,444 --> 01:31:40,915
... when your girlfriend is in a coma.

1689
01:31:43,750 --> 01:31:47,278
I'm not sure what part you are laughing at.

1690
01:31:49,298 --> 01:31:51,798
They say he struggles,
but he doesn't seem to struggle,

1691
01:31:51,823 --> 01:31:55,514
He looks like
just lying there.

1692
01:31:56,622 --> 01:32:00,631
I say bad things to him, and...

1693
01:32:00,633 --> 01:32:03,734
I say bad things to him,
I hurt him.

1694
01:32:05,571 --> 01:32:06,969
He likes birds.

1695
01:32:06,969 --> 01:32:09,704
He is very excited every time he sees birds. He said,

1696
01:32:09,704 --> 01:32:11,575
"Look at this, it's a bird."

1697
01:32:11,577 --> 01:32:15,446
I always think, "Yes, there are
all over the place. They're birds."

1698
01:32:15,448 --> 01:32:16,934
But he...

1699
01:32:16,934 --> 01:32:18,541
He likes that bird, you know?

1700
01:32:18,566 --> 01:32:21,223
Every bird he sees,
he sees it.

1701
01:32:24,756 --> 01:32:30,054
His father just called and
said they couldn't move him...

1702
01:32:30,866 --> 01:32:34,059
... because the infection has already reached the heart.

1703
01:32:39,104 --> 01:32:43,126
That means he...

1704
01:32:45,069 --> 01:32:47,576
That means he can die.

1705
01:32:54,086 --> 01:32:57,190
I don't know if you can hear me
or not, but...

1706
01:32:59,316 --> 01:33:03,650
That would be great if
you could wake up.

1707
01:33:05,313 --> 01:33:09,533
If you have to go,
you can go, but...

1708
01:33:09,535 --> 01:33:12,603
It will be very good
if you stay here.

1709
01:33:13,873 --> 01:33:18,645
I really apologize
for my actions, understand?

1710
01:33:34,488 --> 01:33:36,824
Terry:
"Please come as soon as possible."

1711
01:34:16,169 --> 01:34:17,668
Mother.

1712
01:34:17,670 --> 01:34:20,671
You make your tears
fill me.

1713
01:34:20,673 --> 01:34:23,556
When can I feel my face?

1714
01:34:23,912 --> 01:34:25,967
Hey, you really made
us scared, Gather.

1715
01:34:25,967 --> 01:34:27,444
Right./
"Builder"?

1716
01:34:27,446 --> 01:34:28,908
Come on, dad always
calls me that.

1717
01:34:28,933 --> 01:34:31,348
Not since I was an adult. /
Yes, that's right.

1718
01:34:31,350 --> 01:34:33,305
Dad always calls you that.

1719
01:34:36,629 --> 01:34:38,589
Sorry, baby./
What happened?

1720
01:34:38,591 --> 01:34:40,958
You're okay, are you okay? /
What shit is that?

1721
01:34:40,960 --> 01:34:42,793
We have to be a little thick
your liquid.

1722
01:34:42,795 --> 01:34:45,421
Your esophagus is not enough
strong to swallow it.

1723
01:34:45,446 --> 01:34:48,790
It feels like sperm. /
It's good to hear a father.

1724
01:34:48,815 --> 01:34:51,647
He does not have a social obstacle
until the anesthetics disappear.

1725
01:34:51,647 --> 01:34:53,353
Seriously, Mom, you have to try it.

1726
01:34:53,353 --> 01:34:54,972
No, wait, honey. /
Stop saying that.

1727
01:34:54,974 --> 01:34:57,508
Come on.

1728
01:34:57,510 --> 01:35:00,921
They charge us $ 48 for that,
don't worry.

1729
01:35:02,180 --> 01:35:03,697
Why are you here?

1730
01:35:03,697 --> 01:35:05,749
I haven't heard my voice for a long time.

1731
01:35:05,751 --> 01:35:07,885
He is always here.

1732
01:35:07,887 --> 01:35:10,521
Can I talk to
both of you outside?

1733
01:35:10,523 --> 01:35:11,822
Yes.

1734
01:35:11,824 --> 01:35:14,926
We will return soon. /
We are outside. Okay.

1735
01:35:21,570 --> 01:35:23,167
Hey.

1736
01:35:23,458 --> 01:35:27,504
Emily has a step named
Adult-onset Still & apos; s Disease.

1737
01:35:27,506 --> 01:35:30,393
Kumail mentioned the ankle
his leg was injured...

1738
01:35:30,393 --> 01:35:32,323
... and the swelling
still hasn't died down...

1739
01:35:32,323 --> 01:35:35,508
... up to a few days in care,
and that is unusual.

1740
01:35:35,508 --> 01:35:38,782
Still & apos; s Disease is when the body
thinks health network...

1741
01:35:38,784 --> 01:35:41,552
... is an infection,
so try to fight it.

1742
01:35:41,554 --> 01:35:44,871
It's like a misunderstanding
biological.

1743
01:35:44,871 --> 01:35:48,054
Yes. / So we give
he is anti-inflammatory...

1744
01:35:48,079 --> 01:35:49,921
... and he is stable after
several hours.

1745
01:35:49,946 --> 01:35:51,654
He will need time
for recovery,

1746
01:35:51,654 --> 01:35:53,697
But he will be fine.

1747
01:35:53,699 --> 01:35:55,909
Wow. /
He will recover completely.

1748
01:35:56,945 --> 01:35:59,036
What are you doing here?

1749
01:35:59,038 --> 01:36:00,751
I visit someone
at the end of the hall...

1750
01:36:00,776 --> 01:36:03,540
... and I thought about coming
and greeting Emily.

1751
01:36:03,542 --> 01:36:06,410
I'm kidding.
I am here for you.

1752
01:36:06,412 --> 01:36:09,847
You bastards and I
don't like you.

1753
01:36:09,849 --> 01:36:12,604
I'm not a bastard.
I am not.

1754
01:36:12,604 --> 01:36:14,677
You're a bastard. /
You're under the influence of drugs,

1755
01:36:14,677 --> 01:36:19,723
So you don't think clearly.
No, man, I'm not kidding.

1756
01:36:19,725 --> 01:36:21,733
You're not funny to me.

1757
01:36:21,733 --> 01:36:23,594
You just make me sad.

1758
01:36:23,596 --> 01:36:26,073
You make me sad
in my heart,

1759
01:36:26,098 --> 01:36:28,353
And that makes me sad
to see you.

1760
01:36:28,487 --> 01:36:31,969
So I guess you should go.

1761
01:36:32,401 --> 01:36:35,768
Go, and tell my mother
I want her.

1762
01:36:38,410 --> 01:36:40,933
Can you please call my mother?

1763
01:36:44,275 --> 01:36:47,385
I'm really asking
sorry about that. / Yes, it's okay.

1764
01:36:48,079 --> 01:36:50,643
Emily wants to meet you.

1765
01:36:53,310 --> 01:36:55,348
I will go.

1766
01:36:55,348 --> 01:36:57,591
I think I should not be here.

1767
01:36:58,353 --> 01:37:00,331
Kumail, this is the problem.

1768
01:37:00,333 --> 01:37:06,123
My living conditions are
risk of possible health.

1769
01:37:06,123 --> 01:37:09,176
And you are not that funny.

1770
01:37:09,324 --> 01:37:13,063
But you are also not suitable for
doing other things,

1771
01:37:13,088 --> 01:37:14,754
So it's quite problematic.

1772
01:37:14,754 --> 01:37:18,139
You really make you like
want to say something positive.

1773
01:37:18,139 --> 01:37:20,818
Yes, I think so.

1774
01:37:20,820 --> 01:37:23,396
You know...

1775
01:37:24,388 --> 01:37:27,453
You know what I mean well.
I know a good thing.

1776
01:37:27,478 --> 01:37:30,994
I don't know, you know how I feel. I have to...

1777
01:37:30,996 --> 01:37:33,361
I have to enter. /
Yes.

1778
01:37:36,034 --> 01:37:40,393
What do I miss? / Bricks
on a cheese grill and...

1779
01:37:40,418 --> 01:37:42,861
Right./
Yes, I want that.

1780
01:37:42,886 --> 01:37:45,530
I am right back. /
Bakon or something...

1781
01:37:47,379 --> 01:37:49,480
Hey ./
Hey.

1782
01:37:49,482 --> 01:37:53,050
You will stay
in Chicago for a while? / Yes.

1783
01:37:53,052 --> 01:37:55,886
He must take physical therapy.

1784
01:37:55,888 --> 01:37:58,355
Don't you think you
are too excited...

1785
01:37:58,380 --> 01:38:01,620
... considering your daughter must
take physical therapy?

1786
01:38:02,176 --> 01:38:04,066
That's very strange when we go through...

1787
01:38:04,091 --> 01:38:08,343
... one of the tense experiences
of our lives together and that...

1788
01:38:08,368 --> 01:38:11,226
... never see each other again.

1789
01:38:11,251 --> 01:38:13,324
Maybe.

1790
01:38:16,708 --> 01:38:19,009
But I hope not.

1791
01:38:32,090 --> 01:38:33,824
Throwing birds at you,
then running away,

1792
01:38:33,826 --> 01:38:36,576
And you say,
"Damn! I have a bird now!"

1793
01:38:36,601 --> 01:38:40,558
Hi, the man who is sad
and bro ./Hey.

1794
01:38:40,583 --> 01:38:43,200
There is something we want to say
to you. Tell him.

1795
01:38:43,202 --> 01:38:45,835
We moved to New York. /
New York. / What?

1796
01:38:45,835 --> 01:38:48,105
And we want you to join us.

1797
01:38:48,107 --> 01:38:50,611
Are you serious? /
You have to do it.

1798
01:38:50,636 --> 01:38:52,753
That will be bad initially,
and maybe we finally...

1799
01:38:52,777 --> 01:38:54,575
... can be paid to write jokes.

1800
01:38:54,576 --> 01:38:56,217
This is the best.
Come on, friend.

1801
01:38:56,242 --> 01:39:00,126
You have to come along. I know you don't get Montreal,

1802
01:39:00,151 --> 01:39:02,271
And that's only because...

1803
01:39:02,296 --> 01:39:05,923
... you did the worst comic act
I've ever seen in my life.

1804
01:39:05,925 --> 01:39:07,589
Yes. /
That's nonsense.

1805
01:39:07,613 --> 01:39:10,052
Disgrace of life. /
I call it garbage,

1806
01:39:10,077 --> 01:39:13,885
But I'm afraid I will
mention the real garbage.

1807
01:39:13,885 --> 01:39:16,733
Right, it really
makes me shudder,

1808
01:39:16,735 --> 01:39:19,170
I think there are ghosts that
walk through me.

1809
01:39:19,170 --> 01:39:21,412
We don't need to keep talking
how bad my stage is.

1810
01:39:21,412 --> 01:39:24,141
I see their faces and
the sounds they make.

1811
01:39:24,143 --> 01:39:25,982
I feel one of my eggs is dead.

1812
01:39:26,007 --> 01:39:27,541
Doesn't that happen every month?

1813
01:39:27,566 --> 01:39:29,235
That happens every month, Kumail,

1814
01:39:29,260 --> 01:39:31,188
But I don't always feel it
and do...

1815
01:39:35,821 --> 01:39:38,021
And that's what you did to me.

1816
01:39:38,023 --> 01:39:41,492
I will pack my new one,
and I move to New York,

1817
01:39:41,494 --> 01:39:42,980
And guess what, honey.

1818
01:39:42,980 --> 01:39:45,260
You come with me. /
What about Chris?

1819
01:39:45,260 --> 01:39:48,390
Have you ever seen a dove try
carrying another dove?

1820
01:39:48,415 --> 01:39:50,000
He will be fine.

1821
01:39:50,002 --> 01:39:52,669
The room is not enough in the car.

1822
01:39:52,671 --> 01:39:54,310
We go again a week.
Understand?

1823
01:39:54,310 --> 01:39:56,607
And I've asked to sit down in front, Chicago to Pittsburgh.

1824
01:39:56,609 --> 01:39:59,076
Don't confuse this. /
Your destiny is waiting.

1825
01:39:59,078 --> 01:40:00,711
This will be the biggest step
in your life,

1826
01:40:00,713 --> 01:40:04,291
Apart from moving from Pakistan. /
Yes.

1827
01:40:04,628 --> 01:40:06,783
I don't get enlightenment
or anything else...

1828
01:40:06,785 --> 01:40:09,946
Hey, ting, ting, ting...

1829
01:40:09,971 --> 01:40:12,130
Hi, everyone.
Thank you for coming.

1830
01:40:12,130 --> 01:40:13,991
I just want to say
some...

1831
01:40:13,993 --> 01:40:15,465
A few words here.

1832
01:40:15,465 --> 01:40:17,995
Mom, why is Kumail here?

1833
01:40:17,997 --> 01:40:20,197
Because he is always there.

1834
01:40:20,199 --> 01:40:24,001
Mother invites sisters and mother invites her.

1835
01:40:24,003 --> 01:40:25,769
And for...

1836
01:40:25,771 --> 01:40:27,442
Emily, come here. Come here.

1837
01:40:27,442 --> 01:40:29,293
I want to say something.

1838
01:40:29,293 --> 01:40:31,146
Daddy./
Talk between your friends.

1839
01:40:31,146 --> 01:40:32,558
This might need...

1840
01:40:33,438 --> 01:40:36,524
Emily managed to peel
oranges this morning.

1841
01:40:36,549 --> 01:40:37,935
Father! /
Yes.

1842
01:40:37,935 --> 01:40:40,335
It's Clementine.

1843
01:40:40,360 --> 01:40:42,311
Actually, a Clementine.

1844
01:40:42,336 --> 01:40:46,123
That fruit can be peeled
by baby monkeys,

1845
01:40:46,125 --> 01:40:48,528
But he can do it.

1846
01:40:48,553 --> 01:40:50,573
And yes, that's all.
We...

1847
01:40:50,573 --> 01:40:52,169
Thank you, everyone.

1848
01:40:55,819 --> 01:40:57,319
Hi.

1849
01:40:58,308 --> 01:41:00,761
I like your stick.

1850
01:41:00,761 --> 01:41:04,031
I heard being a gigolo isn't easy. /
Right.

1851
01:41:04,505 --> 01:41:08,111
Can we talk for a while? /
Sure.

1852
01:41:12,617 --> 01:41:16,053
I've collected a few
important things for me,

1853
01:41:16,055 --> 01:41:18,383
And I want to show the
to you.

1854
01:41:18,383 --> 01:41:21,539
I call this
My Devotion Bag.

1855
01:41:22,737 --> 01:41:28,031
These are all visit permissions...

1856
01:41:28,033 --> 01:41:31,232
... from the moment I visited you
when you were in...

1857
01:41:39,911 --> 01:41:45,898
This is the ticket from your parents who came to see me appear,

1858
01:41:45,898 --> 01:41:49,808
And I'm aware of how extraordinary they are,

1859
01:41:49,832 --> 01:41:53,320
And how extraordinary you are,

1860
01:41:53,379 --> 01:41:56,552
And how extraordinary is that honesty.

1861
01:41:58,963 --> 01:42:02,673
What are you doing?
Are you cremating someone?

1862
01:42:02,673 --> 01:42:06,403
This is ash from all
Pakistani women...

1863
01:42:06,405 --> 01:42:10,807
Not a woman... But a photo of a Pakistani woman.

1864
01:42:10,809 --> 01:42:14,398
I think it's a good idea,
and it feels a little...

1865
01:42:14,398 --> 01:42:16,847
That feels a little stupid.

1866
01:42:25,423 --> 01:42:29,153
I know I'm a bad girlfriend...

1867
01:42:29,153 --> 01:42:31,395
But I have changed.

1868
01:42:31,397 --> 01:42:34,719
And I will be the person you want to be. Really.

1869
01:42:34,719 --> 01:42:37,124
So...

1870
01:42:38,309 --> 01:42:40,937
Do you want to accept me back?

1871
01:42:42,022 --> 01:42:48,749
Kumail, I'm glad you experienced
this experience...

1872
01:42:50,082 --> 01:42:54,317
But you have to understand if
all happens when I fall asleep.

1873
01:42:54,319 --> 01:42:57,884
As you feel
a few weeks ago,

1874
01:42:57,884 --> 01:43:00,643
And now you say
really feel the opposite.

1875
01:43:00,643 --> 01:43:03,293
And the only thing that changes
is that I'm currently in a coma.

1876
01:43:03,295 --> 01:43:05,696
Honestly, I...

1877
01:43:05,698 --> 01:43:10,467
I see all this, and I
think I can't do it anymore.

1878
01:43:10,469 --> 01:43:12,104
And I can't... /
I...

1879
01:43:12,104 --> 01:43:16,333
I don't want to be a reason
you don't have a family.

1880
01:43:20,304 --> 01:43:22,998
It feels very different now.

1881
01:43:22,998 --> 01:43:25,882
And you can't
do that again.

1882
01:43:27,444 --> 01:43:30,065
Do you understand?

1883
01:43:33,525 --> 01:43:36,117
OK./
Okay?

1884
01:44:47,366 --> 01:44:49,232
Sorry.

1885
01:44:49,257 --> 01:44:51,469
Mother.

1886
01:44:51,494 --> 01:44:52,803
Father.

1887
01:44:52,805 --> 01:44:55,264
Fatima. Brother. How are you?

1888
01:44:55,289 --> 01:44:57,684
There are no plates.

1889
01:45:02,480 --> 01:45:07,117
I forgot, I decided I wouldn't
let you get me out of the family.

1890
01:45:07,119 --> 01:45:09,019
Since I'm a family member,

1891
01:45:09,021 --> 01:45:10,887
I have a reason to give a voice...

1892
01:45:10,889 --> 01:45:12,823
... am I issued
or not,

1893
01:45:12,825 --> 01:45:14,991
And the voice must be absolute...

1894
01:45:14,993 --> 01:45:16,426
Standard parliamentary procedures.

1895
01:45:16,428 --> 01:45:23,995
So, those who agree not to spend
Kumail from family, raise their hands.

1896
01:45:23,995 --> 01:45:27,719
Good. A motion to issue
Kumail from the family was refused.

1897
01:45:27,744 --> 01:45:30,591
So you can talk to me.

1898
01:45:31,489 --> 01:45:34,165
Okay, you gave me
silent treatment.

1899
01:45:34,165 --> 01:45:36,980
I already did what was going to happen.

1900
01:45:36,982 --> 01:45:38,415
I have a solution.

1901
01:45:38,417 --> 01:45:41,251
So, "hi, how are you?"

1902
01:45:41,253 --> 01:45:43,873
This is just the first basic thing.
Do you know.

1903
01:45:44,142 --> 01:45:47,294
"Operate the salt."
Practical.

1904
01:45:48,360 --> 01:45:50,260
"Always with comedy."

1905
01:45:50,262 --> 01:45:53,378
Ma'am, I made it specifically for you.

1906
01:45:53,738 --> 01:45:59,579
"Kumail, why are you more handsome
compared to your sister Naveed?"

1907
01:45:59,604 --> 01:46:01,744
Bullshit.

1908
01:46:04,737 --> 01:46:09,045
"I admit, this is intended to
mess up the controversy."

1909
01:46:10,241 --> 01:46:13,589
"It's dancing you can't
get someone out of the family,"

1910
01:46:13,589 --> 01:46:18,555
"Because they will always be your family."

1911
01:46:19,717 --> 01:46:22,201
I agree with that.
That is good.

1912
01:46:22,201 --> 01:46:26,655
So, I'll leave this
_ here for you.

1913
01:46:31,469 --> 01:46:35,405
I'm sorry I'm lying about
women, LSAT and all.

1914
01:46:35,407 --> 01:46:38,199
That's wrong.
And one more thing.

1915
01:46:38,199 --> 01:46:41,926
I moved to New York
to pursue Stand-Up,

1916
01:46:41,926 --> 01:46:45,949
But I didn't leave this family.

1917
01:47:05,169 --> 01:47:09,292
My parents want to make it
me in a match.

1918
01:47:09,317 --> 01:47:13,358
Or in terms of
Pakistan, romance!

1919
01:47:13,383 --> 01:47:16,767
And this morning, I told them
all about my life,

1920
01:47:16,792 --> 01:47:19,039
I tell them
about Emily.

1921
01:47:19,064 --> 01:47:21,217
They drive me out
out of family.

1922
01:47:21,219 --> 01:47:23,697
I might never
talk to them again.

1923
01:47:23,722 --> 01:47:25,649
So that's what happened.

1924
01:47:25,923 --> 01:47:28,496
What's wrong? /
Can you come in?

1925
01:47:28,521 --> 01:47:30,523
OK.

1926
01:47:30,548 --> 01:47:33,311
I swear, mother and father like
my roommate early semester,

1927
01:47:33,311 --> 01:47:36,117
But instead of randomly casting
men,

1928
01:47:36,142 --> 01:47:38,582
You only manage
every time.

1929
01:47:38,939 --> 01:47:40,537
All over the place.

1930
01:47:40,539 --> 01:47:42,931
In every room in this house.

1931
01:47:43,093 --> 01:47:45,599
Included is next to me.

1932
01:47:48,409 --> 01:47:50,213
We have to go.

1933
01:47:50,215 --> 01:47:51,732
Go home?

1934
01:47:51,732 --> 01:47:54,752
No./
Yes, it's time.

1935
01:47:55,987 --> 01:47:57,819
I'm not ready yet.

1936
01:47:57,844 --> 01:48:01,103
Do you know? You are strong.

1937
01:48:01,128 --> 01:48:04,294
And that's true.

1938
01:48:06,543 --> 01:48:09,841
Then we will go to the mosque
and hear the graphic details...

1939
01:48:09,866 --> 01:48:12,425
... from religious people who were killed 1,400 years ago.

1940
01:48:12,450 --> 01:48:15,505
I mean like,
Tarantino-esque details,

1941
01:48:15,507 --> 01:48:17,007
And everyone will cry,

1942
01:48:17,009 --> 01:48:20,010
Competing with each other who
cries louder.

1943
01:48:20,012 --> 01:48:21,929
And I never cried.

1944
01:48:21,929 --> 01:48:24,314
I thought, "what's wrong with me?
Am I damaged?"

1945
01:48:24,316 --> 01:48:25,856
The only one I cry is
that much...

1946
01:48:25,881 --> 01:48:28,720
... is the first 15 minutes
of the "Up."

1947
01:48:30,188 --> 01:48:32,362
This is a photo of me and my mother.

1948
01:48:32,387 --> 01:48:33,807
I was 7 years old at the time.

1949
01:48:34,048 --> 01:48:37,277
People always complain about
water in New York.

1950
01:48:37,302 --> 01:48:39,652
I think Chicago water is very bad.

1951
01:48:39,677 --> 01:48:41,598
That's good. /
Father, Mother.

1952
01:48:41,600 --> 01:48:44,634
I think I'll be out for a while.

1953
01:48:44,636 --> 01:48:46,536
What, alone?

1954
01:48:46,538 --> 01:48:49,172
Yes, just take a walk
around the block.

1955
01:48:49,174 --> 01:48:50,807
Maybe buy frozen yogurt.

1956
01:48:50,809 --> 01:48:52,374
Are you okay?
Can you do it?

1957
01:48:52,399 --> 01:48:55,311
You can walk alone? /
Yes, Daddy.

1958
01:48:55,313 --> 01:48:58,990
Have a good time. If you feel like going into a coma, contact us.

1959
01:48:59,015 --> 01:49:01,284
Father, it's too early. /
Right.

1960
01:49:01,618 --> 01:49:03,214
I love you,
to meet tomorrow morning.

1961
01:49:03,239 --> 01:49:05,355
I love you Ah./
OK. I love you. Dah.

1962
01:49:05,357 --> 01:49:07,162
Have a good time. /
That is certain.

1963
01:49:07,187 --> 01:49:08,885
You brought your cellphone? /
Yes.

1964
01:49:11,396 --> 01:49:14,664
But you like it, & bro, right? /
Yes. I mean...

1965
01:49:15,467 --> 01:49:16,543
Yes.

1966
01:49:16,543 --> 01:49:18,601
I mean...

1967
01:49:21,817 --> 01:49:24,670
Hey ./
Hi.

1968
01:49:26,053 --> 01:49:28,144
What are you doing here?

1969
01:49:28,146 --> 01:49:29,991
I happen to be near here...

1970
01:49:29,991 --> 01:49:32,282
... and I see if you
will be here, so...

1971
01:49:32,282 --> 01:49:34,818
I think for
come and greet you.

1972
01:49:34,820 --> 01:49:36,653
You look healthy.

1973
01:49:36,655 --> 01:49:38,288
How is your blood oxygen level?

1974
01:49:38,290 --> 01:49:42,469
Already in range. /
Good.

1975
01:49:45,843 --> 01:49:48,821
This is my brother, Naveed.

1976
01:49:48,846 --> 01:49:51,054
Hi./
Hi. I'm Emily.

1977
01:49:51,079 --> 01:49:52,648
I heard a lot about you.

1978
01:49:52,648 --> 01:49:55,560
Nice to finally be able to meet
with you.

1979
01:49:57,368 --> 01:50:01,411
Actually there is something that I want to tell you.

1980
01:50:04,515 --> 01:50:07,417
OK, I'll...

1981
01:50:08,185 --> 01:50:10,644
See you later. /
Dah.

1982
01:50:10,798 --> 01:50:12,996
See you later.

1983
01:50:23,666 --> 01:50:25,424
Are you warm enough?

1984
01:50:25,424 --> 01:50:28,805
Yes. I wear two pairs of socks.

1985
01:51:00,809 --> 01:51:03,792
Do you mind?

1986
01:51:04,275 --> 01:51:06,276
No.

1987
01:51:15,072 --> 01:51:17,654
I'm glad we will
go home tomorrow.

1988
01:51:17,656 --> 01:51:20,058
Me too.

1989
01:51:20,301 --> 01:51:23,107
See? I should be brushing my teeth.

1990
01:51:24,220 --> 01:51:26,134
I like that.

1991
01:51:26,774 --> 01:51:28,634
When something like this happens,

1992
01:51:28,659 --> 01:51:30,433
There is a little hope...

1993
01:51:30,435 --> 01:51:34,113
... if you will really
have a new outlook on life,

1994
01:51:34,138 --> 01:51:37,718
And you feel different
about everything,

1995
01:51:37,743 --> 01:51:42,098
Then appreciate every
sunshine,

1996
01:51:42,123 --> 01:51:43,984
And for the most part,

1997
01:51:44,009 --> 01:51:48,885
I feel like I can't wake up early. Do you know?

1998
01:51:51,214 --> 01:51:53,903
Sorry I talked too much
about myself.

1999
01:51:53,928 --> 01:51:55,948
No... / Do you have many
do Stand-Up?

2000
01:51:55,973 --> 01:52:02,633
Are you... / Yes, I look stunning
in the Montreal Comedy Festival.

2001
01:52:02,658 --> 01:52:06,116
Really like... /
I saw the video.

2002
01:52:07,429 --> 01:52:09,130
Yes. That's not good. /
No.

2003
01:52:09,130 --> 01:52:11,874
I will be honest with you, it's not good.

2004
01:52:11,876 --> 01:52:14,880
I know. /
But there are many things I like.

2005
01:52:14,905 --> 01:52:17,644
It's really a lot that I like.

2006
01:52:21,988 --> 01:52:24,682
I moved to New York.

2007
01:52:26,257 --> 01:52:29,692
Really? /
Yes.

2008
01:52:29,694 --> 01:52:33,896
Mary, CJ and I...

2009
01:52:33,898 --> 01:52:38,591
... will go by land and we
have got a place, and...

2010
01:52:39,570 --> 01:52:41,304
When did you leave?

2011
01:52:41,306 --> 01:52:43,294
Next week.

2012
01:52:43,319 --> 01:52:46,409
I'm very happy for you.
It is very nice.

2013
01:52:46,411 --> 01:52:51,748
You will definitely be very
successful in New York.

2014
01:52:53,784 --> 01:52:56,128
What do you want to say?

2015
01:52:56,153 --> 01:52:58,054
What?

2016
01:52:58,056 --> 01:53:03,366
You say you want to say something to me. What?

2017
01:53:05,114 --> 01:53:09,178
I just want to thank you.

2018
01:53:09,178 --> 01:53:11,726
My parents tell me everything that I did for me...

2019
01:53:11,751 --> 01:53:13,569
... and I feel last
we talk...

2020
01:53:13,569 --> 01:53:16,622
... I'm not thankful
correctly to you, so...

2021
01:53:16,641 --> 01:53:18,385
Yes.

2022
01:53:19,662 --> 01:53:21,636
No problem.

2023
01:53:21,661 --> 01:53:23,379
I should go.

2024
01:53:23,381 --> 01:53:26,449
Do you want to contact Uber? /
No, I will walk.

2025
01:53:26,451 --> 01:53:29,369
This is really very good.

2026
01:53:29,369 --> 01:53:30,987
OK.

2027
01:53:30,989 --> 01:53:34,090
Okay, see you later. /
Yes.

2028
01:53:39,963 --> 01:53:42,799
The community will be very
different without you.

2029
01:53:42,801 --> 01:53:45,636
You have to come along.

2030
01:53:46,324 --> 01:53:48,571
No, I'm fine here.

2031
01:53:48,573 --> 01:53:51,405
I will miss you./
Me too.

2032
01:53:52,841 --> 01:53:54,711
Go from here, bastard./
Good.

2033
01:53:54,713 --> 01:53:56,916
Come here, stupid.

2034
01:53:58,215 --> 01:54:00,594
See you later. /
I will miss you.

2035
01:54:06,272 --> 01:54:08,355
You are still issued
from the family.

2036
01:54:08,380 --> 01:54:12,100
But because we didn't have time
say until you see you, so...

2037
01:54:12,742 --> 01:54:15,598
Your mother is very angry with you.

2038
01:54:15,600 --> 01:54:17,355
He doesn't want to get out of the car,

2039
01:54:17,380 --> 01:54:19,293
He doesn't even want to see you.

2040
01:54:19,293 --> 01:54:23,248
Daddy doesn't believe you keep a secret like that from me, your father.

2041
01:54:23,273 --> 01:54:25,424
Sorry.

2042
01:54:25,923 --> 01:54:27,577
Come here.

2043
01:54:27,579 --> 01:54:29,412
Your mother asks daddy
give this to you.

2044
01:54:29,414 --> 01:54:32,548
Modern Biryani.
For you on the road.

2045
01:54:32,550 --> 01:54:34,917
Your passions.

2046
01:54:34,919 --> 01:54:38,794
Your mother made a special
for you with extra potatoes.

2047
01:54:39,790 --> 01:54:41,771
Thank you, ma'am!

2048
01:54:42,664 --> 01:54:46,662
Is he okay? /
Right now? No.

2049
01:54:46,664 --> 01:54:48,550
I will miss you.

2050
01:54:48,550 --> 01:54:52,391
Daddy is forbidden to
hug you, so...

2051
01:54:52,391 --> 01:54:55,232
A proud father has you
as my child.

2052
01:54:56,373 --> 01:54:58,574
See you forever.

2053
01:54:59,813 --> 01:55:02,253
And help daddy,
when you get to New York,

2054
01:55:02,278 --> 01:55:06,964
SMS us and tell us if you've arrived safely, understand?

2055
01:55:07,313 --> 01:55:09,018
Definitely.

2056
01:55:09,904 --> 01:55:12,706
Dad, may I ask you something
?

2057
01:55:12,723 --> 01:55:15,625
When you and Mother go
to your first date,

2058
01:55:15,627 --> 01:55:18,279
What movie do you watch?

2059
01:55:18,446 --> 01:55:20,879
Satte Pe Satta.

2060
01:55:25,409 --> 01:55:26,905
Our favorite song.

2061
01:55:26,930 --> 01:55:28,971
Why do you ask?

2062
01:55:28,973 --> 01:55:32,315
I'm just curious.

2063
01:55:50,019 --> 01:55:51,809
Let's go. //Ao./
OK.

2064
01:55:51,809 --> 01:55:53,930
Good. See you, guys. /
We leave.

2065
01:55:53,932 --> 01:55:56,654
We will send a message. / Sorry. /
Yes, please do it.

2066
01:56:01,132 --> 01:56:04,173
The first time I came
to America, I was 14 years old,

2067
01:56:04,175 --> 01:56:06,476
And I only visited
My uncle in New York,

2068
01:56:06,478 --> 01:56:08,211
And the moment was coincident
was Thanksgiving.

2069
01:56:08,213 --> 01:56:10,044
My first day in America,

2070
01:56:10,044 --> 01:56:13,995
My uncle took me to Day
Parade Macy & apos; s Thanksgiving.

2071
01:56:14,020 --> 01:56:17,220
And I like,
"this is every day in America!"

2072
01:56:17,222 --> 01:56:19,655
Like in an ad.

2073
01:56:19,657 --> 01:56:24,260
Every day they celebrate
party for Garfield.

2074
01:56:24,262 --> 01:56:26,980
There is no day that must be followed after that day.

2075
01:56:28,488 --> 01:56:30,768
I lie to
my parents,

2076
01:56:30,793 --> 01:56:33,063
I said they I
would become a lawyer.

2077
01:56:33,088 --> 01:56:36,263
They are very disappointed, because
they want me to be a doctor.

2078
01:56:36,263 --> 01:56:40,474
You must be thinking, "why don't you tell
you want to be a doctor?"

2079
01:56:40,499 --> 01:56:43,097
"After all it's a lie." And I
say, "it must be trustworthy."

2080
01:56:43,122 --> 01:56:45,030
If I say they are
I want to be a doctor,

2081
01:56:45,055 --> 01:56:46,592
They will say,
"nonsense."

2082
01:56:46,617 --> 01:56:50,472
If I say "lawyer," they will say, "Okay, that's something."

2083
01:56:50,472 --> 01:56:51,883
Because there is a strict hierarchy.

2084
01:56:51,883 --> 01:56:57,293
That Doctor, Engineer, Lawyer,
hundreds of jobs,

2085
01:56:57,295 --> 01:57:01,032
Isis, then comedian.

2086
01:57:06,306 --> 01:57:09,705
Sorry, it's very rude
interrupts comedians.

2087
01:57:09,707 --> 01:57:12,608
That is not interrupting.
I just cheered on you.

2088
01:57:12,610 --> 01:57:14,541
It's a common
misunderstanding.

2089
01:57:14,566 --> 01:57:16,290
Interrupting is not negative.

2090
01:57:16,315 --> 01:57:19,179
So if I say, "Gosh,
you're amazing in bed!"

2091
01:57:19,204 --> 01:57:21,817
That includes interrupting?

2092
01:57:21,819 --> 01:57:24,385
Yes, and you get more
much laughter than me,

2093
01:57:24,409 --> 01:57:25,702
And I don't like that.

2094
01:57:25,703 --> 01:57:27,276
Do you want to come here and
replace me?

2095
01:57:27,301 --> 01:57:30,026
Let's talk about... Are you from out of town, ma'am?

2096
01:57:30,028 --> 01:57:33,095
Chicago./
Windy city.

2097
01:57:33,097 --> 01:57:35,631
What brings you to New York?

2098
01:57:35,633 --> 01:57:38,858
I came here to meet someone. /
And...

2099
01:57:38,858 --> 01:57:40,709
Have you met a man or woman?

2100
01:57:40,709 --> 01:57:43,804
I don't know what your likes are, but...

2101
01:57:43,805 --> 01:57:45,975
Yes, I've met him.

2102
01:57:56,636 --> 01:58:00,119
Emily Actually

2103
01:58:00,603 --> 01:58:04,597
Kumail Actually
(But you already know that)

2104
01:58:05,160 --> 01:58:09,040
Just Married

2105
01:58:09,064 --> 01:58:15,030
Pakistani Marriage
(Parents and Elderly Kumal Actually)

2106
01:58:15,496 --> 01:58:18,996
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2107
01:58:19,020 --> 01:58:22,520
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2109
01:58:26,068 --> 01:58:34,068
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