0 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:20,000 Support dengan like & share :) 1 00:01:04,690 --> 00:01:08,569 Love is so great that it's almost unreal. 2 00:01:10,279 --> 00:01:13,490 I feel bad for the people who can't find it. 3 00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:18,787 We've all met those types who try to convince their coworkers that they're fine without it. 4 00:01:18,871 --> 00:01:20,497 Then you take a look at their cubicle 5 00:01:20,497 --> 00:01:22,666 and see heart-shaped frames all over their desk 6 00:01:22,791 --> 00:01:25,294 with pictures of their three-legged cat named Bob. 7 00:01:26,879 --> 00:01:29,798 Not me! Not anymore. 8 00:01:29,882 --> 00:01:31,675 I've paid my dues. 9 00:01:33,886 --> 00:01:37,890 Old people always say: "When you meet the one you'll know." 10 00:01:37,973 --> 00:01:39,391 They're right. 11 00:01:39,391 --> 00:01:42,186 When I met Richard, 12 00:01:42,269 --> 00:01:43,770 It felt like... 13 00:01:43,896 --> 00:01:45,981 It felt like the butterflies in my belly dusted off their cobwebs 14 00:01:46,064 --> 00:01:47,900 and started fluttering again. 15 00:01:49,484 --> 00:01:52,988 He was the one, my only one. 16 00:02:07,794 --> 00:02:09,588 Oh, my God. 17 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:14,676 Oh, my God! 18 00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:19,097 Oh, my God! 19 00:02:20,182 --> 00:02:26,480 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 20 00:02:28,565 --> 00:02:29,775 Oh, my God! 21 00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:32,861 Oh, my God! 22 00:02:44,373 --> 00:02:47,793 No, no! I don't get it! 23 00:02:47,876 --> 00:02:48,961 Hey, wait! 24 00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:51,672 Are you guys hiring? 25 00:02:51,797 --> 00:02:53,465 Because no one cares about love anymore, 26 00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:56,677 so why don't you just have sex and get paid for it, you know? 27 00:02:56,760 --> 00:03:01,598 Oh, come on! Who cares if my vagina falls off from all the diseases out there? 28 00:03:01,682 --> 00:03:03,767 I'll take some open sores. 29 00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:06,895 Ooooh! Do you want some of this? 30 00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:11,900 Come on! I got what it takes. 31 00:03:11,984 --> 00:03:14,069 No? Okay. 32 00:03:28,292 --> 00:03:30,794 Oh, my God! 33 00:03:30,878 --> 00:03:33,964 I cannot get last night out of my head! 34 00:03:33,964 --> 00:03:37,384 Richard, Richard and that little... 35 00:03:39,261 --> 00:03:43,265 Wait, what was her name? 36 00:03:43,390 --> 00:03:45,475 Oh, yeah. Whore. 37 00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:48,478 Hi, baby. I'm home! 38 00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:51,565 They paid me 200 bucks to take a picture of a pink poodle. 39 00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:58,363 Richard? Is this mushu still good? 40 00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:11,877 Hey, baby. 41 00:04:12,002 --> 00:04:13,462 Come on. 42 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:21,678 I am sorry. 43 00:04:21,762 --> 00:04:26,767 Because we got it Tuesday and there's pork in it, 44 00:04:26,892 --> 00:04:28,894 I'm gonna... get... 45 00:04:48,497 --> 00:04:51,083 You're late! 46 00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:54,795 I've been waiting. Sit down! 47 00:04:54,878 --> 00:04:57,172 Come on, sit down. Give me your hands. 48 00:04:59,591 --> 00:05:03,470 You are such a lost soul. 49 00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:05,764 You're in pain. Someone hurt you. 50 00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:09,768 Someone ripped your heart out and tried to play badminton with it. 51 00:05:09,893 --> 00:05:12,396 This man who hurt you, he's a dark spirit. 52 00:05:12,479 --> 00:05:14,481 I see blackness all around him! 53 00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:15,691 But wait. 54 00:05:16,775 --> 00:05:17,901 What? 55 00:05:17,901 --> 00:05:21,488 I see a white pony. He stands alone. 56 00:05:21,572 --> 00:05:23,490 His spirit is very bright. 57 00:05:23,574 --> 00:05:26,201 He runs towards you and, and... 58 00:05:26,285 --> 00:05:27,703 And? 59 00:05:27,703 --> 00:05:30,789 Oh, you turn away. I hate that part! 60 00:05:30,873 --> 00:05:32,291 Why do I turn away? 61 00:05:32,374 --> 00:05:34,501 Because you have to learn the lessons 62 00:05:34,585 --> 00:05:36,795 before you can ride the white pony. 63 00:05:36,879 --> 00:05:38,672 White pony? 64 00:05:38,797 --> 00:05:41,675 Can't be a white stallion or somethin'? 65 00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:45,971 No. It's the white pony that you will ride into the sunset. 66 00:05:46,096 --> 00:05:48,891 Only then can you have the happy ending you desire. 67 00:05:48,974 --> 00:05:51,101 But first you have to believe 68 00:05:51,185 --> 00:05:53,478 and you have to learn the lessons that come before. 69 00:05:53,562 --> 00:05:55,898 Lessons? What kind of lessons? 70 00:05:55,981 --> 00:05:58,984 Your own spirit not that bright yet. 71 00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:02,863 It needs its roots but you're close. 72 00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:06,575 First though you must go through more pain 73 00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:09,703 before your heart can find true happiness. 74 00:06:10,662 --> 00:06:12,372 That just sucks! 75 00:06:12,498 --> 00:06:13,665 It only gets worse. 76 00:06:13,790 --> 00:06:15,000 You gotta be kidding me! 77 00:06:15,083 --> 00:06:16,376 What do I look like? A comedian? 78 00:06:16,502 --> 00:06:18,462 If you don't pay attention, 79 00:06:18,587 --> 00:06:21,173 if you don't listen to your inner psychic voice, 80 00:06:21,298 --> 00:06:24,301 if you choose the wrong paths and the wrong situations, 81 00:06:24,301 --> 00:06:26,887 if you think you can just do it all on your own, 82 00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:28,180 if you ignore the signs, 83 00:06:28,180 --> 00:06:30,682 love will never find its way into your heart. 84 00:06:30,682 --> 00:06:35,687 You'll live a lonely, desperate, isolated, 85 00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:37,564 miserable existence. 86 00:06:37,564 --> 00:06:40,400 I would not wanna be you. 87 00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:04,466 Hi. 88 00:07:04,591 --> 00:07:06,468 Hi, Carrie. It's Rebecca. 89 00:07:09,263 --> 00:07:10,264 10: 00. 90 00:07:11,974 --> 00:07:14,476 Why! 91 00:07:14,601 --> 00:07:18,188 I never realized how beautiful it is in the morning. 92 00:07:18,272 --> 00:07:19,773 Birds chirping, 93 00:07:19,898 --> 00:07:22,901 smell of ass on Hollywood Boulevard. 94 00:07:22,985 --> 00:07:24,278 Hey, you wanna start jogging? 95 00:07:24,403 --> 00:07:25,779 Let's jogl 96 00:07:25,863 --> 00:07:28,991 Are you on crack, Rebecca? I'm not jogging! 97 00:07:28,991 --> 00:07:30,993 Please. 98 00:07:30,993 --> 00:07:32,870 Have you seen my boobs lately? 99 00:07:32,870 --> 00:07:34,079 Yeah, they're pretty. 100 00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:36,290 Of course they are! And you know why? 101 00:07:36,290 --> 00:07:39,168 Because I don't fucking jog! 102 00:07:39,293 --> 00:07:42,462 Besides, I have my Animal Kingdom audition in a couple of hours. 103 00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:44,798 Wanna go shopping? 104 00:07:44,882 --> 00:07:46,300 Okay. 105 00:07:50,304 --> 00:07:54,892 He is a jerk, Beck. A cock sucking loser jerk. 106 00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:57,895 Oh, my God. Every time something like this happens, 107 00:07:57,978 --> 00:08:00,564 it makes me seriously wanna consider lesbianism. Ow! 108 00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:02,983 You can't even stand looking at your own vagina. 109 00:08:03,066 --> 00:08:05,903 That's not true. I just had to figure out which department did what. 110 00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:07,571 Hey! 111 00:08:07,696 --> 00:08:09,865 Maybe you can concentrate more on your work now. 112 00:08:12,576 --> 00:08:14,995 I have been concentrating. 113 00:08:15,078 --> 00:08:18,081 It just takes a while to go from sandwich ads and dog shows 114 00:08:18,165 --> 00:08:21,084 to Vanity Fair covers. Doesn't just happen overnight! 115 00:08:21,168 --> 00:08:22,586 Oh! Oh, no! 116 00:08:22,669 --> 00:08:24,087 What? 117 00:08:24,171 --> 00:08:27,966 I left my camera, my lenses, my tripods, my gels. Everything! 118 00:08:28,091 --> 00:08:29,593 I left my future at Richard's. 119 00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:31,803 Oh, no. 120 00:08:36,266 --> 00:08:39,186 No, no way. I'm not going over to his house. 121 00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:43,190 I'm not going to his house! Michelle! 122 00:08:43,273 --> 00:08:46,068 Oh, hell, no! 123 00:08:47,194 --> 00:08:51,698 For real? Ooh, girl! 124 00:08:51,782 --> 00:08:54,368 Yeah, you know I'll get your stuff, girl. 125 00:08:54,493 --> 00:08:56,078 Mm-hm. 126 00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:59,289 No, no, no. I ain't gonna beat his ass. 127 00:08:59,373 --> 00:09:02,584 I can't speak for John, though. 128 00:09:02,668 --> 00:09:04,795 No, that shit would be funny. 129 00:09:07,089 --> 00:09:08,382 I got to go. 130 00:09:12,678 --> 00:09:14,096 What the hell are you doing? 131 00:09:16,473 --> 00:09:20,477 Hot Bacon. Three o'clock. 132 00:09:20,602 --> 00:09:22,688 That's not Bacon. That's Porter House. 133 00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:26,191 Oh, no! He's wearing sneakers! 134 00:09:26,275 --> 00:09:27,776 You can have him. 135 00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:30,195 Fuck that! 136 00:09:30,279 --> 00:09:32,197 I'm not going near that world. 137 00:09:32,281 --> 00:09:36,201 It's gonna be a very long time before Rebecca goes searching for another dick. 138 00:09:36,201 --> 00:09:38,495 The best medicine is to get back out there. 139 00:09:38,579 --> 00:09:42,791 There's nothing wrong with a little gratuitous sex to help mend the pain. 140 00:09:42,875 --> 00:09:45,002 Remember the last time we were all single? 141 00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:46,503 We had sex with every one. 142 00:09:46,587 --> 00:09:50,674 Carrie, Brad Pitt's throbbing cock couldn't help me right now. 143 00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:54,303 Nothing in the world could heal this pain that I'm go... 144 00:09:54,386 --> 00:09:56,096 What? 145 00:09:56,180 --> 00:09:59,183 Do you remember how jealous Richard would get when any guy would go near me? 146 00:09:59,892 --> 00:10:00,893 Hey, baby... 147 00:10:02,603 --> 00:10:04,104 What? 148 00:10:04,188 --> 00:10:05,189 Can I help you? 149 00:10:05,981 --> 00:10:06,982 No! 150 00:10:08,066 --> 00:10:10,277 What the hell do you think you're doing? 151 00:10:10,402 --> 00:10:11,570 Pap smear? 152 00:10:11,695 --> 00:10:14,573 Yeah. He would go ape shit. 153 00:10:14,698 --> 00:10:16,200 Exactly! 154 00:10:16,283 --> 00:10:18,994 So, I show up at Richard's fashion show tonight with another guy. 155 00:10:19,077 --> 00:10:21,079 He sees me mauling him and his insides 156 00:10:21,205 --> 00:10:22,998 will get eaten up almost as bad as mine did. 157 00:10:22,998 --> 00:10:26,293 It's the best revenge revenge! How do I look? 158 00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:31,089 Like a summer flower that got rained and stung by a bee. 159 00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:34,593 Go, go, go! 160 00:11:01,203 --> 00:11:02,996 Hi. 161 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:05,374 I was just sitting over there with my friend 162 00:11:05,374 --> 00:11:10,087 and saw that you were kinda staring at... me? 163 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:12,798 Yeah, I was staring at you. 164 00:11:14,883 --> 00:11:16,093 What do you do for lunch? 165 00:11:16,677 --> 00:11:17,678 Nothing. 166 00:11:17,803 --> 00:11:20,597 Nothing? Do you like Chinese? 167 00:11:21,473 --> 00:11:22,474 Huh? 168 00:11:22,599 --> 00:11:23,600 Chinese food. 169 00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:26,478 Chicken chow mein, mushu pork, you know. 170 00:11:27,896 --> 00:11:29,982 Mu shu. 171 00:11:32,276 --> 00:11:34,695 You know, if you don't like Chinese, we could always just... 172 00:11:34,695 --> 00:11:38,365 No, no. Uhm, what are you doing tonight? 173 00:11:38,490 --> 00:11:40,868 Do you wanna go to this fashion show with me? 174 00:11:40,993 --> 00:11:43,203 Sweetheart, do you have your Gold card? 175 00:11:43,287 --> 00:11:48,000 I seem to have left mine at home. Who's this? 176 00:11:48,083 --> 00:11:51,503 Oh, I don't know. It's just some bimbo hitting on me? 177 00:12:11,106 --> 00:12:12,691 Come on, hurry that shit up. 178 00:12:12,774 --> 00:12:15,986 Hey, you know, it's not like I do this for a living, you know. 179 00:12:19,573 --> 00:12:20,574 Oh, shit! 180 00:12:20,699 --> 00:12:21,867 What? 181 00:12:26,205 --> 00:12:28,665 I can't even believe you feel for that shit. 182 00:12:28,790 --> 00:12:29,791 Very funny, Michelle. 183 00:12:37,174 --> 00:12:38,467 See how it's done? 184 00:12:38,467 --> 00:12:40,469 That's what I was gonna do. 185 00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:48,602 Ugh! 186 00:12:48,685 --> 00:12:51,104 Look at him thinking lookin' all good and shit. 187 00:12:51,188 --> 00:12:54,775 This is exactly why I don't date models. 188 00:12:56,568 --> 00:12:58,403 I don't see what she saw in the guy. 189 00:12:58,487 --> 00:13:00,906 But it's all over now. 190 00:13:00,989 --> 00:13:05,077 We can all kiss Richard's skank ass good bye. 191 00:13:05,202 --> 00:13:08,497 Now, get the shit and let's go. I gotta call my baby daddy. 192 00:13:22,469 --> 00:13:23,804 Holy shit! 193 00:14:11,476 --> 00:14:12,978 What the hell are you doing? 194 00:14:16,690 --> 00:14:18,192 What's up, dawg? 195 00:14:19,693 --> 00:14:20,986 What? 196 00:14:21,904 --> 00:14:24,281 You got a problem, huh? 197 00:14:24,281 --> 00:14:27,201 You wanna, uh, you wanna dance here? 198 00:14:28,493 --> 00:14:31,079 You wanna take this outside? Huh? 199 00:14:31,872 --> 00:14:32,873 What's up? 200 00:14:34,082 --> 00:14:36,793 Just get the hell out of here. 201 00:14:36,877 --> 00:14:39,087 You screwed up, man. 202 00:14:39,087 --> 00:14:43,175 You had a rose but you had to go and pluck a weed. 203 00:14:43,300 --> 00:14:47,596 And then to make things even worse you go and fuck up all the camera equipment? 204 00:14:47,679 --> 00:14:49,973 What kind of sick bastard are you? 205 00:14:50,098 --> 00:14:53,185 That was her whole life, you asshole! 206 00:14:53,268 --> 00:14:55,270 She sucked at it, anyway. 207 00:14:59,608 --> 00:15:00,776 Huh! 208 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:06,782 Huh! 209 00:15:11,787 --> 00:15:12,996 You and me, buddy. 210 00:15:14,790 --> 00:15:17,376 You and me! 211 00:15:20,504 --> 00:15:21,797 When? 212 00:15:25,384 --> 00:15:26,885 Some day. 213 00:15:29,888 --> 00:15:31,473 Some day. 214 00:15:33,767 --> 00:15:35,602 What up, dick? 215 00:15:35,686 --> 00:15:37,771 Just a little warning. 216 00:15:37,896 --> 00:15:39,898 That ain't mud on your bed. 217 00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:42,568 Let's go. 218 00:15:48,282 --> 00:15:50,576 We're giving nonstop excitement. 219 00:15:52,202 --> 00:15:53,787 Thanks for coming with me. 220 00:15:53,787 --> 00:15:56,206 I told you you'd have better luck here. 221 00:15:56,290 --> 00:16:00,794 It can be that hard to find one normal guy in this town just to use one night. 222 00:16:00,794 --> 00:16:04,882 It's not hard at all. They're begging to get used. That last guy was a fluke. 223 00:16:05,007 --> 00:16:06,592 Who the fuck would ask some one out 224 00:16:06,592 --> 00:16:08,468 with their wife shopping two feet away? 225 00:16:08,594 --> 00:16:10,971 I don't get it, Carrie. 226 00:16:11,096 --> 00:16:12,890 I mean, I gave my heart to Richard. 227 00:16:12,973 --> 00:16:15,309 What made him feel the need to have another woman? 228 00:16:15,392 --> 00:16:18,478 Well, that's easy. Penis insecurity. 229 00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:21,273 When the penis doesn't get enough showmanship, 230 00:16:21,273 --> 00:16:24,067 it has to remind itself that it's still an almighty tool 231 00:16:24,193 --> 00:16:25,903 and that it could make any woman moan. 232 00:16:25,986 --> 00:16:30,073 One when it got used to like yours but one from uncharted waters. 233 00:16:30,199 --> 00:16:31,283 Carrie Winters? 234 00:16:31,408 --> 00:16:33,785 Right here, honey! Wish me luck. 235 00:16:33,869 --> 00:16:34,870 Good luck. 236 00:17:03,607 --> 00:17:06,777 How're you doing? 237 00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:10,906 I'm Mike. 238 00:17:17,079 --> 00:17:18,497 You're so gonna get this part. 239 00:17:18,580 --> 00:17:22,084 Oh! I'm not an actress. 240 00:17:22,209 --> 00:17:23,377 What? 241 00:17:23,502 --> 00:17:25,587 You're so hot! 242 00:17:26,797 --> 00:17:29,174 You're like smoking hot. 243 00:17:29,174 --> 00:17:32,886 You're like hot air popcorn pumper hot. 244 00:17:32,970 --> 00:17:34,096 Thank you. 245 00:17:34,179 --> 00:17:36,974 Like hotter than exhaust hot. 246 00:17:38,183 --> 00:17:41,103 Hotter than a devil's pitch fork hot. 247 00:17:47,192 --> 00:17:48,902 What's that smell? 248 00:17:52,573 --> 00:17:54,074 I don't smell anything. 249 00:17:55,993 --> 00:17:57,870 It's totally doing something to me. 250 00:17:59,496 --> 00:18:00,998 And what is that? 251 00:18:07,379 --> 00:18:08,881 It's coming from you. 252 00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:13,468 What is that beautiful scent you've got on? 253 00:18:13,594 --> 00:18:15,971 Deodorant? 254 00:18:17,389 --> 00:18:21,310 To me it smells like... obsession! 255 00:18:26,982 --> 00:18:28,275 Hey, baby. 256 00:18:35,490 --> 00:18:37,201 You smell so hot. 257 00:18:41,705 --> 00:18:47,377 Here at the Animal Kingdom we bring you non-stop excitement. 258 00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:54,510 In a world filled with lions and tigers and bears... 259 00:18:54,593 --> 00:19:00,182 oh my, we bring you all of the fun without any of the danger. 260 00:19:04,269 --> 00:19:07,397 Well, maybe a little bit of the danger. 261 00:19:07,397 --> 00:19:10,275 So hold on to your seats every one 262 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:14,404 because we're gonna bring you heart stopping, claw biting, 263 00:19:14,488 --> 00:19:16,698 family action fun! 264 00:19:17,908 --> 00:19:20,786 That was just wonderful! 265 00:19:21,870 --> 00:19:24,790 Really? Right on! 266 00:19:24,873 --> 00:19:27,084 How long have you been in the business? 267 00:19:28,210 --> 00:19:30,295 Longer than you can scream arghhhhh! 268 00:19:30,379 --> 00:19:34,508 Oh, she... You're a feisty little one. 269 00:19:34,591 --> 00:19:37,970 Hey, are you guys single, by any chance? 270 00:19:38,095 --> 00:19:41,390 As... as a matter of fact we... we both are. 271 00:19:41,473 --> 00:19:44,685 Really? I'll be right back. 272 00:19:45,894 --> 00:19:48,397 Rebecca! Come on in here. They wanna meet you. 273 00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:50,399 No, no. No, I don't want to. 274 00:19:50,399 --> 00:19:53,193 Just get your ass in here. Hurry up! 275 00:19:55,904 --> 00:19:57,197 Now! 276 00:19:59,408 --> 00:20:01,994 Rebecca, I'd like you to meet our dates for tonight. 277 00:20:14,798 --> 00:20:19,094 Why, why, why why? 278 00:20:21,805 --> 00:20:23,473 Excuse me! 279 00:20:23,599 --> 00:20:25,309 The least you could do is thank me! 280 00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:27,394 For what? 281 00:20:27,477 --> 00:20:29,104 We have dates! 282 00:20:29,188 --> 00:20:32,482 Yeah, with two guys that are one chromosome away from being Woody Allen. 283 00:20:33,609 --> 00:20:36,695 Woody is hot and you know it. 284 00:20:36,778 --> 00:20:39,781 Remember in White men can't jump when they were playing basketball? 285 00:20:39,907 --> 00:20:41,408 And he took off his shirt 286 00:20:41,492 --> 00:20:44,286 and he looked all golden like the sunset rising up... 287 00:20:44,286 --> 00:20:46,371 What are you talking about? I said Woody Allen! 288 00:20:46,371 --> 00:20:48,999 Ooh! Who is he? 289 00:20:49,875 --> 00:20:51,710 Listen to me, Crissy Snow, 290 00:20:51,793 --> 00:20:53,587 if Richard gets one good look at this mug I'm with, 291 00:20:53,670 --> 00:20:55,380 he'll piss in his pants. 292 00:20:55,506 --> 00:20:58,383 No jealousy, my friend. Just laughter. 293 00:20:58,509 --> 00:21:02,304 I figured it out for you, Janet Woods. 294 00:21:02,387 --> 00:21:05,390 When Richard comes down that catwalk, I'm gonna shout out to him. 295 00:21:05,390 --> 00:21:06,892 When he looks down you grab Milo 296 00:21:06,975 --> 00:21:08,602 and you put his head between your breasts. 297 00:21:08,685 --> 00:21:12,606 He won't see that mug, just a man nestling in your bosoms. 298 00:21:12,606 --> 00:21:13,607 Not bad. 299 00:21:13,690 --> 00:21:15,484 I'm going, okay? 300 00:21:15,609 --> 00:21:16,610 Sorry, sorry. 301 00:21:16,693 --> 00:21:19,071 I don't understand why we gotta be running this shit. 302 00:21:19,196 --> 00:21:22,699 Because Beck left a note that said, "Save me, it's an emergency. 303 00:21:22,699 --> 00:21:23,700 Love. Annie Hall." 304 00:21:23,784 --> 00:21:26,286 This shit never be starting on time. 305 00:21:26,411 --> 00:21:27,579 Excuse me. 306 00:21:27,704 --> 00:21:30,582 Hold on. Just have to wait. Way too crowded in there. 307 00:21:30,707 --> 00:21:31,792 Wait for someone to come out. 308 00:21:31,875 --> 00:21:34,711 Oh, hell, dodgy, you know who I am? 309 00:21:34,795 --> 00:21:36,296 Huh? 310 00:21:39,174 --> 00:21:42,302 The small-time crooks are looking more like Cheech and Chong. 311 00:21:45,305 --> 00:21:49,184 Wow! Look at the beautiful shiksas. 312 00:21:49,184 --> 00:21:50,894 Very beautiful shiksas. 313 00:21:50,978 --> 00:21:52,187 So how was I today? 314 00:21:52,271 --> 00:21:54,106 You were great. 315 00:21:54,189 --> 00:21:56,191 Will you be my bubbela? 316 00:21:56,191 --> 00:21:57,985 Ooh, sorry. 317 00:22:01,488 --> 00:22:05,993 I can do wonders for you baby. Mm-hm. 318 00:22:05,993 --> 00:22:07,286 Is that so? 319 00:22:07,411 --> 00:22:11,999 Yeah, that is so. That's right. 320 00:22:12,082 --> 00:22:15,002 I'm gonna make you cry like a little baby right now. 321 00:22:15,085 --> 00:22:17,087 Uh-huh. 322 00:22:17,087 --> 00:22:19,673 Let me get all up in that shit. 323 00:22:19,798 --> 00:22:21,300 Mm-hm. 324 00:22:21,383 --> 00:22:22,509 Yeah, baby. 325 00:22:27,890 --> 00:22:29,391 Hey, ya! 326 00:22:29,474 --> 00:22:32,102 Who thinks you're cute? I do. 327 00:22:32,186 --> 00:22:34,271 You wanna take me home? 328 00:22:34,271 --> 00:22:35,397 No. 329 00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:36,773 Is it 'cause I'm too tall? 330 00:22:36,899 --> 00:22:38,984 I've got a ladder with your name on it! 331 00:22:38,984 --> 00:22:39,985 No. 332 00:22:40,110 --> 00:22:41,612 It's 'cause you think I'm ugly? 333 00:22:41,695 --> 00:22:42,696 No. 334 00:22:42,696 --> 00:22:45,199 It's 'cause you're gay? Oh, impotent? 335 00:22:45,282 --> 00:22:46,492 No! 336 00:22:46,575 --> 00:22:48,577 Is it 'cause you just don't understand the vagina? 337 00:22:48,702 --> 00:22:50,078 I'll be happy to draw a chart. 338 00:23:04,301 --> 00:23:07,471 Carrie, can you just pay attention, all right? 'Cause he's coming down. 339 00:23:34,498 --> 00:23:35,999 Hey, Richard! 340 00:24:00,899 --> 00:24:02,693 Oh, my God! 341 00:24:02,776 --> 00:24:07,072 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 342 00:24:07,197 --> 00:24:09,992 Why this shit happens to me? 343 00:24:09,992 --> 00:24:14,788 He's the one that let his dick go in the wrong fucking hole! 344 00:24:14,788 --> 00:24:17,708 It's not fair! 345 00:24:21,295 --> 00:24:24,506 I'm the one that's humiliated all the time! 346 00:24:24,590 --> 00:24:27,593 I mean, it's not fair. Humiliation right on my face? 347 00:24:27,593 --> 00:24:28,594 Girl! 348 00:24:28,677 --> 00:24:30,679 Are you crazy? 349 00:24:30,804 --> 00:24:32,681 Your big old titty is hanging out. 350 00:24:38,395 --> 00:24:39,479 Fuck it! 351 00:24:41,398 --> 00:24:43,984 Just fucking globs of fat! 352 00:24:46,111 --> 00:24:47,613 That girl crazy. 353 00:25:04,213 --> 00:25:05,672 You know, you're wasting water. 354 00:25:10,302 --> 00:25:12,012 But we really have to get out of here, 355 00:25:12,095 --> 00:25:14,598 'cause there's this giant woman that's gonna come chasing after me 356 00:25:14,681 --> 00:25:16,975 any second from now. I'm serious. 357 00:25:18,685 --> 00:25:20,687 You wanna go get some ice cream? 358 00:25:36,286 --> 00:25:38,413 Tell me I don't smell like puke anymore. 359 00:25:39,373 --> 00:25:41,291 You don't smell like puke anymore. 360 00:25:42,793 --> 00:25:44,711 You're a bad liar. 361 00:25:46,088 --> 00:25:47,673 What can I get you two? 362 00:25:48,799 --> 00:25:51,301 I'll have the " I just got dumped" sundae. 363 00:25:51,385 --> 00:25:54,096 I don't think that's on the menu, dear. 364 00:25:54,096 --> 00:25:57,975 Then make me the best sundae you could possibly imagine 365 00:25:58,100 --> 00:26:00,686 that would take away every painful experience 366 00:26:00,686 --> 00:26:03,689 that any man ever did you wrong. 367 00:26:06,692 --> 00:26:08,110 You know what I think? 368 00:26:09,486 --> 00:26:10,612 What do you think, John? 369 00:26:10,696 --> 00:26:13,073 I think everything happens for a reason. 370 00:26:13,198 --> 00:26:15,075 Oh, God! 371 00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:17,494 Please, don't give me any of that spiritual crap. 372 00:26:17,578 --> 00:26:19,079 Heard it from a psychic this morning. 373 00:26:19,204 --> 00:26:21,373 The best I'm ever gonna find is a white pony. 374 00:26:21,373 --> 00:26:26,003 And to tell you the truth I'd settle for a brown donkey. 375 00:26:26,086 --> 00:26:28,380 You know what? Maybe that's your problem. 376 00:26:28,505 --> 00:26:31,383 You just keep on settling for these idiots. 377 00:26:31,508 --> 00:26:35,095 I have known you for so long and every single day 378 00:26:35,095 --> 00:26:37,973 you teach me how to be a better person. 379 00:26:38,098 --> 00:26:40,809 But for whatever reason you will not let someone love you 380 00:26:40,893 --> 00:26:43,395 the way you deserve to be loved. 381 00:26:46,190 --> 00:26:48,609 And how should I be loved, John? 382 00:26:55,407 --> 00:26:56,783 Thank you! 383 00:26:59,077 --> 00:27:01,497 I just have to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back. 384 00:27:04,875 --> 00:27:08,587 God, you're such an idiot! You just gotta fucking say it, John. 385 00:27:08,587 --> 00:27:11,298 Just say the fucking words. 386 00:27:11,298 --> 00:27:13,091 Say it out loud, okay? 387 00:27:15,093 --> 00:27:19,681 Rebecca, you should be loved like no one else in this world. 388 00:27:19,806 --> 00:27:21,475 You should smile every day 389 00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:24,978 knowing that every morsel of your being is being nourished by a man 390 00:27:25,103 --> 00:27:28,899 that will do anything he can to make Rebecca happy. 391 00:27:29,900 --> 00:27:32,903 Me, Rebecca. I love you. 392 00:27:32,986 --> 00:27:35,781 The way you should be loved 393 00:27:35,781 --> 00:27:38,408 is to be loved by me. 394 00:27:41,078 --> 00:27:43,580 See that? There you go. 395 00:27:46,208 --> 00:27:48,001 It's good! 396 00:27:48,001 --> 00:27:49,711 That was beautiful. 397 00:27:51,088 --> 00:27:52,297 Thanks. 398 00:28:00,806 --> 00:28:03,392 Rebecca, there's something I gotta tell you. 399 00:28:04,810 --> 00:28:07,104 If you tell me that you're dying of a terminal illness, 400 00:28:07,187 --> 00:28:09,106 I swear to God I'm gonna kill myself. 401 00:28:09,106 --> 00:28:10,774 I'm not dying. 402 00:28:10,899 --> 00:28:12,901 Oh, thank God. 403 00:28:16,405 --> 00:28:17,406 What is it? 404 00:28:19,074 --> 00:28:21,410 Richard destroyed all your camera equipment. 405 00:28:25,205 --> 00:28:26,707 What? 406 00:28:26,790 --> 00:28:29,209 When I went to your place to pick up all your stuff, 407 00:28:29,209 --> 00:28:34,006 your equipment was in the corner and he just... he ruined it. 408 00:28:40,512 --> 00:28:41,889 I'm sorry. 409 00:28:45,309 --> 00:28:47,394 What am I gonna do? 410 00:28:47,477 --> 00:28:49,897 I'm not gonna be able to work. I can't afford to buy a new equipment. 411 00:28:49,897 --> 00:28:53,775 It'll be fine. I'll... I'll pawn one of my guitars and... 412 00:28:53,901 --> 00:28:57,112 No! No, John. 413 00:28:57,196 --> 00:29:00,491 You've been collecting those things since Keanu Reeves started his first band. 414 00:29:02,075 --> 00:29:03,494 Just forget it. 415 00:29:03,494 --> 00:29:05,579 It's useless. I have no future. 416 00:29:05,704 --> 00:29:07,289 I have no future. 417 00:29:08,290 --> 00:29:10,501 No. Rebecca, wha... 418 00:29:10,584 --> 00:29:12,586 What if your future is sitting right next to you, huh? 419 00:29:13,712 --> 00:29:15,881 Maybe the person sitting right next to you 420 00:29:15,881 --> 00:29:18,383 wants to spend their entire life making Rebecca happy. 421 00:29:18,509 --> 00:29:22,304 You know, stop drowning yourself in this dark pit and pick yourself up 422 00:29:22,387 --> 00:29:24,890 and realize that the person sitting next to you 423 00:29:25,015 --> 00:29:27,976 might just be your entire existence. 424 00:29:27,976 --> 00:29:30,896 Please, take a chance for once. 425 00:29:33,690 --> 00:29:34,691 Excuse me. 426 00:29:34,775 --> 00:29:35,984 Yes? 427 00:29:36,109 --> 00:29:37,903 Are you by chance my future? 428 00:29:38,987 --> 00:29:41,615 Yes, I believe I am. 429 00:29:43,200 --> 00:29:44,910 What do you think? Shall I go for it? 430 00:29:47,788 --> 00:29:49,206 All right. Wish me luck. 431 00:29:50,415 --> 00:29:51,375 What's your name? 432 00:29:51,375 --> 00:29:52,793 Rebecca. 433 00:30:02,803 --> 00:30:06,807 Can I have one "I'm a complete dumb ass pussy" sundae, please? 434 00:30:30,414 --> 00:30:33,000 Are you sure this is ecstasy? 435 00:30:33,000 --> 00:30:36,003 Definitely. Without a doubt. 436 00:30:36,086 --> 00:30:37,880 It's even mildly laced with acid. 437 00:30:38,589 --> 00:30:39,506 Huh? 438 00:30:56,982 --> 00:30:59,193 Do you like to experiment sexually? 439 00:31:02,404 --> 00:31:04,114 What do you mean? 440 00:31:04,114 --> 00:31:07,284 You know... try new things. 441 00:31:10,913 --> 00:31:12,414 Not, not really. 442 00:31:13,290 --> 00:31:15,209 Good. 443 00:31:15,292 --> 00:31:17,002 I can't wait to teach you. 444 00:31:29,097 --> 00:31:30,807 Shhhhh! 445 00:31:43,195 --> 00:31:45,405 Now, count to 30 and come into the bedroom. 446 00:31:46,490 --> 00:31:47,616 Okay. 447 00:31:55,290 --> 00:31:57,292 If this is my future, 448 00:31:57,292 --> 00:32:00,003 I pray a large piano falls from the sky and hits me right now. 449 00:32:05,884 --> 00:32:08,887 Why can't drug hallucinations be real? 450 00:32:10,097 --> 00:32:12,182 Shit's starting to kick. 451 00:32:52,389 --> 00:32:56,101 What the hell, Rebecca. Let's have some fun. 452 00:33:03,483 --> 00:33:05,402 Time to go fishing, baby. 453 00:33:06,612 --> 00:33:07,779 Touch my bass, Rebecca. 454 00:33:09,406 --> 00:33:13,994 Touch my bass! 455 00:33:14,995 --> 00:33:17,498 Touch my fucking bass! 456 00:33:18,999 --> 00:33:23,086 Please, touch my bass. 457 00:33:33,680 --> 00:33:35,390 She look dead. 458 00:33:35,516 --> 00:33:36,683 She's not dead. 459 00:33:36,808 --> 00:33:37,809 How do you know? 460 00:33:37,893 --> 00:33:40,604 'Cause she'd be blue. 461 00:33:40,687 --> 00:33:43,982 Hey, girl, you still with us? 462 00:33:48,403 --> 00:33:49,988 Ooooh! She smells like fish. 463 00:33:50,113 --> 00:33:51,907 Oh, my God. 464 00:33:51,990 --> 00:33:54,618 Did you sleep with Charlie the tuna last night 465 00:33:54,618 --> 00:33:55,994 or do you need to douche? 466 00:33:59,206 --> 00:34:01,083 Just leave me alone. 467 00:34:01,208 --> 00:34:04,378 Take your time. Nobody wanna smell that. 468 00:34:04,378 --> 00:34:05,504 Mm-hm. 469 00:34:12,094 --> 00:34:14,304 Rebecca, I got you some food. 470 00:34:15,389 --> 00:34:16,598 Huh? 471 00:35:00,100 --> 00:35:03,395 What in the hell are you doing? 472 00:35:03,478 --> 00:35:05,814 I knew that should wake you up, girl. 473 00:35:05,898 --> 00:35:07,399 You've been sleeping for three days. 474 00:35:08,317 --> 00:35:10,903 I was not sleeping. 475 00:35:10,986 --> 00:35:13,489 I was thinking. 476 00:35:13,614 --> 00:35:17,117 Well, you might think better when you don't smell like a dead fish. 477 00:35:17,201 --> 00:35:23,290 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 478 00:35:25,918 --> 00:35:29,004 Don't ever say that word again. 479 00:35:30,506 --> 00:35:31,715 Okay. 480 00:35:32,799 --> 00:35:35,886 Well, I'm gonna cook some frozen food. 481 00:35:36,011 --> 00:35:38,096 I can make you a fish stick. 482 00:35:38,180 --> 00:35:39,598 Shut up! 483 00:35:39,681 --> 00:35:41,099 Oh, shit. 484 00:35:41,099 --> 00:35:42,518 What now? 485 00:35:42,601 --> 00:35:44,895 Aunt Flo came early this month. 486 00:35:44,895 --> 00:35:48,815 Well, girl, at least you ain't pregnant and shit. You know what I'm saying? 487 00:35:50,901 --> 00:35:52,986 Would you have helped her with the baby? 488 00:35:52,986 --> 00:35:54,613 I don't know. Would you? 489 00:35:54,696 --> 00:35:56,698 Babies are sticky. 490 00:35:56,782 --> 00:35:59,618 Well, at least she can get some food stamps or somethin'. 491 00:35:59,701 --> 00:36:02,788 Yeah, 'cause you know Richard would've done nothing to help the baby. 492 00:36:02,788 --> 00:36:05,290 Will you guys shut up? 493 00:36:05,290 --> 00:36:07,417 You need to tell me with the two of you living here 494 00:36:07,501 --> 00:36:09,503 you don't have one tampon in the house? 495 00:36:09,586 --> 00:36:12,589 No. We're out. 496 00:36:12,714 --> 00:36:14,007 Can you go buy me some? 497 00:36:14,091 --> 00:36:15,217 I got no money. 498 00:36:15,300 --> 00:36:16,301 Just forget it. 499 00:36:34,987 --> 00:36:38,282 What do you mean I have herpes? That's not possible! 500 00:36:38,282 --> 00:36:42,411 I've only slept with one guy in my entire life. 501 00:36:42,494 --> 00:36:44,580 People like me don't get diseases. 502 00:36:44,705 --> 00:36:46,707 People like you get herpes all the time. 503 00:36:46,707 --> 00:36:49,084 It's the naive ones who think it can't happen to them. 504 00:36:53,505 --> 00:36:56,592 But doctor I... 505 00:36:56,717 --> 00:37:02,806 I can't live with this. 506 00:37:02,890 --> 00:37:05,684 You won't have to. It's called Herpes Away. 507 00:37:05,809 --> 00:37:08,896 It's a creamy little ointment without any deadly side effects. 508 00:37:08,896 --> 00:37:11,315 Take once a day to avoid outbreaks. 509 00:37:11,398 --> 00:37:13,317 This is amazing. 510 00:37:13,400 --> 00:37:15,986 I can't wait to tell my friends all about it! 511 00:37:16,111 --> 00:37:17,488 Just stop. 512 00:37:18,614 --> 00:37:19,615 What's wrong? 513 00:37:19,698 --> 00:37:21,408 I'm not believing a word you're saying! 514 00:37:21,492 --> 00:37:23,619 That's 'cause I'm acting. 515 00:37:23,702 --> 00:37:26,413 I mean, I see quite a few things on your resume, 516 00:37:26,413 --> 00:37:28,916 and I think how could anybody have ever hired you? 517 00:37:28,999 --> 00:37:31,502 And It dawns on me. I bet every time you did get hired 518 00:37:31,502 --> 00:37:32,920 it was always by a man. 519 00:37:32,920 --> 00:37:35,380 You need to pay your dues in acting, not with men! 520 00:37:37,007 --> 00:37:39,092 You don't know what you're talking about. 521 00:37:39,218 --> 00:37:42,513 I hope one day you do know what I'm talking about. 522 00:37:42,596 --> 00:37:44,181 Yeah? 523 00:37:45,390 --> 00:37:48,018 Well, I hate to rain on your parade, lady, 524 00:37:48,018 --> 00:37:50,604 but this shit doesn't work. 525 00:37:55,317 --> 00:37:57,319 What's for dinner? 526 00:37:57,402 --> 00:37:59,988 We've got a special on ground chuck today, ladies. 527 00:38:00,113 --> 00:38:02,282 You can't go wrong with meat. 528 00:38:09,581 --> 00:38:10,999 Oh, shit. 529 00:38:18,090 --> 00:38:20,384 Oh, no! 530 00:38:31,395 --> 00:38:32,813 Oh, no! 531 00:38:35,190 --> 00:38:36,191 Shit. 532 00:38:45,117 --> 00:38:46,785 Hello? 533 00:38:46,910 --> 00:38:49,496 Hello. Please, please hurry up. It's an emergency. 534 00:38:49,580 --> 00:38:51,790 This is an emergency, too, sweetheart. 535 00:39:12,019 --> 00:39:14,688 Herb, we're gonna clean up on aisle two. 536 00:39:18,483 --> 00:39:21,487 Herb, we're gonna clean up on aisle two. 537 00:39:25,199 --> 00:39:27,618 Oh, help. I've fallen! 538 00:39:29,495 --> 00:39:33,415 Oh, and I'm bleeding! Oh, no! 539 00:39:33,499 --> 00:39:35,209 Oh! 540 00:39:59,316 --> 00:40:01,819 Herb, we're gonna clean up. 541 00:40:03,487 --> 00:40:04,988 Oh, shit! 542 00:40:09,201 --> 00:40:11,203 Herb, we're gonna clean up. 543 00:40:11,286 --> 00:40:14,790 No. Thanks, Herb, I've got it covered! 544 00:40:27,302 --> 00:40:29,805 When they were in the bag, they were $1.99. 545 00:40:29,805 --> 00:40:32,015 Well, I can't ring them up unless they're in the bag. 546 00:40:32,015 --> 00:40:34,601 There's no bag. This is all that's left, okay? 547 00:40:34,685 --> 00:40:37,604 I already told you if they're not in the bag, I can't ring them up. 548 00:40:37,688 --> 00:40:40,190 Listen, sweetheart, we're both girls, okay? 549 00:40:40,190 --> 00:40:41,692 Just give me a break. 550 00:40:41,817 --> 00:40:43,986 The longer I stand here, the more Herb's gonna have to clean up. 551 00:40:43,986 --> 00:40:46,697 Well, that seems to be your problem, not mine. 552 00:40:46,822 --> 00:40:48,407 No, please. 553 00:40:48,490 --> 00:40:52,411 Herb, we got a price check, please, on the super size maxi pads 554 00:40:52,411 --> 00:40:54,997 for the woman who keeps bleeding all over the store. 555 00:41:06,091 --> 00:41:07,176 Stop her! 556 00:41:09,761 --> 00:41:11,555 Come back here. Come back here! 557 00:41:24,276 --> 00:41:26,361 Gonna get you, lady. 558 00:41:39,875 --> 00:41:43,378 Hey, Beck. How is it going? What have you got there? 559 00:41:43,462 --> 00:41:44,588 Nothing. 560 00:42:03,857 --> 00:42:06,485 His body is ridiculous. 561 00:42:09,988 --> 00:42:11,865 So, when are you going to see him again? 562 00:42:11,990 --> 00:42:14,576 Tonight. He's taking me to the Tantra Grill. 563 00:42:14,660 --> 00:42:16,662 You're so lucky to be dating a model. 564 00:42:16,787 --> 00:42:21,792 He's not just a model, Lilly. He's fucking Richard Huntington, the top model. 565 00:42:21,792 --> 00:42:24,878 And he just landed three commercials. That's huge! 566 00:42:24,962 --> 00:42:27,256 Wow! Maybe I'll catch up with a drink after dinner. 567 00:42:27,381 --> 00:42:28,757 You can't. 568 00:42:28,757 --> 00:42:30,092 Why not? 569 00:42:30,175 --> 00:42:32,386 'Cause after dinner I'm gonna fuck the shit out of him. 570 00:42:35,764 --> 00:42:38,267 Do you think maybe you can put me up with one of his friends? 571 00:42:38,392 --> 00:42:40,269 Uhm, no. 572 00:42:48,861 --> 00:42:50,988 You a cyclist or just play for the other team? 573 00:42:51,989 --> 00:42:53,782 Why? 'Cause I'm waxing my legs? 574 00:42:53,866 --> 00:42:56,160 You know, I get real, real nosy sometimes. 575 00:42:56,160 --> 00:42:59,163 I like to know everything, you know. 576 00:42:59,288 --> 00:43:01,290 What you need to do is wax that ass. 577 00:43:01,373 --> 00:43:03,458 I'm actually a magician. 578 00:43:03,584 --> 00:43:05,961 I'm doing an underwater trick on the tonight show next week 579 00:43:06,086 --> 00:43:08,088 and I can't have any hair on my legs. 580 00:43:08,172 --> 00:43:10,174 Oh, that's cool, that's real dope. 581 00:43:10,257 --> 00:43:11,258 Where are you from? 582 00:43:11,258 --> 00:43:14,261 I flew in from Chicago actually. 583 00:43:16,096 --> 00:43:18,974 Hey! What you doing tonight? 584 00:43:19,057 --> 00:43:24,271 'Cause I would love to hook you up my girl, you know what I'm saying? 585 00:43:24,396 --> 00:43:26,273 She's been through a lot of shit, you know. 586 00:43:26,356 --> 00:43:29,776 Take her out to dinner and make her feel real good. 587 00:43:29,860 --> 00:43:31,278 That could be fun. 588 00:43:31,278 --> 00:43:33,655 That could be real nice. She need to get out real, real bad, 589 00:43:33,780 --> 00:43:35,991 you know what I'm saying? She's been through some shit. 590 00:43:41,163 --> 00:43:43,165 Well, she sounds great. 591 00:43:43,165 --> 00:43:45,292 Oh, no, no, no. I didn't mean for her to sound like that. 592 00:43:45,375 --> 00:43:48,462 She is a super cool Barbie doll that just got dumped by Ken. 593 00:43:48,587 --> 00:43:51,465 But she's cool, she's a good girl. You know what I'm saying? 594 00:43:52,674 --> 00:43:55,761 Is there, uhm, some place, you know, cool 595 00:43:55,886 --> 00:43:57,387 that you recommend that I could take her? 596 00:43:57,471 --> 00:43:59,181 Uh, 597 00:44:01,683 --> 00:44:04,561 You know, I was thinking maybe you could take her to the Tantra Grill. 598 00:44:04,686 --> 00:44:06,980 Around 8:00. Don't be late 'cause I'll beat your ass. 599 00:44:10,067 --> 00:44:11,193 Anything else? 600 00:44:11,193 --> 00:44:13,195 Pay me 40 bucks for the wax 601 00:44:13,278 --> 00:44:15,572 and 20 bucks 'cause I look good. 602 00:44:15,572 --> 00:44:19,284 Ooh. 603 00:44:19,284 --> 00:44:22,496 Here you go. Keep the change. 604 00:44:22,579 --> 00:44:24,665 Yo, this is only a dollar. 605 00:44:25,791 --> 00:44:26,792 Oh! 606 00:44:27,876 --> 00:44:28,877 Look again. 607 00:44:31,380 --> 00:44:35,092 Hey! Wooh baby! That's my boy! 608 00:44:35,175 --> 00:44:37,761 It's magic. 609 00:44:37,886 --> 00:44:40,389 "You will experience the tingling sensation 610 00:44:40,472 --> 00:44:42,766 "as the fatty acids and fruit enzymes 611 00:44:42,766 --> 00:44:45,477 replenish the nutrients in your skin." 612 00:44:48,272 --> 00:44:50,691 Hi, how are you? 613 00:44:51,984 --> 00:44:55,070 Tom, is it? I'm Rebecca. 614 00:44:55,070 --> 00:44:57,990 You're a magician, huh? That's cool. 615 00:44:58,866 --> 00:45:01,994 This? Oh, it's syphilis. 616 00:45:02,077 --> 00:45:03,370 I caught it in prison. 617 00:45:04,288 --> 00:45:05,664 Where are you going? 618 00:45:09,793 --> 00:45:12,379 "Remove with one smooth motion." 619 00:45:12,462 --> 00:45:14,089 Okay. 620 00:45:15,757 --> 00:45:17,092 Ouch! 621 00:45:17,885 --> 00:45:20,095 Uh... uh! 622 00:45:21,263 --> 00:45:22,389 Uh! 623 00:45:25,976 --> 00:45:27,394 Oh, my God! 624 00:45:29,771 --> 00:45:32,691 One, two... three! 625 00:45:34,485 --> 00:45:37,196 Oh, for crying out loud, Rebecca, 626 00:45:37,279 --> 00:45:39,281 revenge is not the solution. 627 00:45:39,364 --> 00:45:43,076 I'll be fine... I think. 628 00:45:43,160 --> 00:45:45,579 And now you have lost your fiance. 629 00:45:45,662 --> 00:45:47,873 You're not gonna have kids until you're 50 630 00:45:47,873 --> 00:45:49,666 Ma, we were never engaged! 631 00:45:49,791 --> 00:45:51,376 That is just great to hear. 632 00:45:51,376 --> 00:45:54,796 You have been living with this man for two years 633 00:45:54,796 --> 00:45:57,758 You need to find a good catholic boy. 634 00:45:57,758 --> 00:46:00,093 What about that nice fellow that works for you? 635 00:46:00,177 --> 00:46:01,970 Who, John? 636 00:46:02,095 --> 00:46:05,182 See? He's even named after one of the disciples. 637 00:46:05,182 --> 00:46:07,392 Ma, I am so not his type. 638 00:46:07,476 --> 00:46:09,394 So, what are you gonna do with your life now? 639 00:46:09,478 --> 00:46:12,064 Shoot up some heroine and become a sex slave. 640 00:46:12,189 --> 00:46:14,775 Oh, for Pete's sakes! 641 00:46:14,858 --> 00:46:16,276 Ma, did you hear that? 642 00:46:16,276 --> 00:46:17,694 Hear what? 643 00:46:18,779 --> 00:46:20,697 Oh, mercy! 644 00:46:24,076 --> 00:46:25,285 Ha! 645 00:46:30,374 --> 00:46:32,459 Come on! 646 00:46:35,295 --> 00:46:40,175 Okay. Okay. Okay. 647 00:46:40,175 --> 00:46:41,593 Okay. 648 00:46:41,593 --> 00:46:42,761 Okay, now I gotta zip. 649 00:46:44,471 --> 00:46:46,890 Okay, here we go. Here we go. 650 00:46:48,976 --> 00:46:50,561 Fuck! 651 00:46:52,187 --> 00:46:53,772 Come on, please! 652 00:46:55,566 --> 00:46:59,361 Okay, okay. Just one more thing. 653 00:46:59,486 --> 00:47:04,158 Just let me button up. I swear to God I'll be good, okay? 654 00:47:04,283 --> 00:47:07,870 Here we go God. One, two, three. 655 00:47:07,995 --> 00:47:10,080 Come on. 656 00:47:10,164 --> 00:47:11,290 Okay. 657 00:47:11,290 --> 00:47:14,459 Fuck! Fuck! 658 00:47:19,590 --> 00:47:21,675 Fuck you. 659 00:47:27,598 --> 00:47:29,683 Puff The magic dragon is in the house. 660 00:47:29,766 --> 00:47:31,560 Do you think he can magically make my ass smaller? 661 00:47:31,685 --> 00:47:34,271 Carrie didn't tell me that her jeans were size negative four. 662 00:47:34,271 --> 00:47:37,983 They're baggy on me. Don't let your big ass deter you from your mission. 663 00:47:37,983 --> 00:47:40,569 We want Richard to eat his heart out. 664 00:47:40,569 --> 00:47:42,571 Oh, he will. 665 00:47:50,787 --> 00:47:52,498 Two of hearts. 666 00:47:53,957 --> 00:47:58,670 Oh, my God! 667 00:48:07,888 --> 00:48:10,182 You want a beer? 668 00:48:10,265 --> 00:48:13,477 Yeah. Thanks. 669 00:48:13,477 --> 00:48:14,978 You're welcome. 670 00:48:28,575 --> 00:48:29,993 Magic, huh? 671 00:48:31,286 --> 00:48:32,162 Yeah. 672 00:48:38,877 --> 00:48:39,878 Hi. 673 00:48:39,962 --> 00:48:41,463 I'm Rebecca. 674 00:48:42,381 --> 00:48:44,258 You are gorgeous. 675 00:48:46,593 --> 00:48:47,594 I'm lucky! 676 00:48:50,681 --> 00:48:52,683 Oh! Okay. 677 00:48:54,059 --> 00:48:55,394 Oh, isn't that nice? 678 00:48:55,477 --> 00:48:58,063 I'll go put these in invisible water. 679 00:49:00,190 --> 00:49:01,191 Are you ready? 680 00:49:01,275 --> 00:49:03,193 Okay. 681 00:49:06,697 --> 00:49:08,365 Hey, what's invisible water? 682 00:49:08,365 --> 00:49:10,075 I don't know. 683 00:49:20,586 --> 00:49:24,798 So, Michelle told me you've been having a tough time lately. 684 00:49:24,882 --> 00:49:28,177 Yeah, yeah. But I'd really rather not talk about it. 685 00:49:28,260 --> 00:49:31,180 I'm trying to forget about it for like a whole ten minutes. 686 00:49:34,474 --> 00:49:35,684 I hope I can help. 687 00:49:35,767 --> 00:49:38,478 Me, too. I crave distraction right now. 688 00:49:38,562 --> 00:49:41,190 Really? Huh! 689 00:49:41,190 --> 00:49:43,066 Why don't you look under the table? 690 00:49:51,575 --> 00:49:54,286 Uhm... there's a fucking bird under the table. 691 00:49:54,286 --> 00:49:56,163 Why don't you look again? 692 00:50:01,168 --> 00:50:03,170 I swear to God there was a bird a second ago. 693 00:50:04,796 --> 00:50:05,881 It's magic. 694 00:50:05,964 --> 00:50:08,467 Oh. 695 00:50:10,260 --> 00:50:14,264 Uhm... I'm really hungry. Can we maybe call the waiter over here 696 00:50:14,389 --> 00:50:17,059 so we can order some food or I'm going to start gnawing on the tablecloth? 697 00:50:17,059 --> 00:50:18,477 No problem. 698 00:50:21,396 --> 00:50:22,773 Oh, do you have a headache? 699 00:50:22,898 --> 00:50:26,860 Shhhhhh. I'm psychically calling our waiter. 700 00:50:32,074 --> 00:50:33,492 Are we ready to order? 701 00:50:34,785 --> 00:50:36,578 Es ma'gico! 702 00:50:41,166 --> 00:50:42,668 Would you care to hear the specials? 703 00:50:42,793 --> 00:50:43,877 Sure. 704 00:50:43,961 --> 00:50:45,879 We have a fettuccine that is out of this world 705 00:50:45,963 --> 00:50:47,798 bathed in white clam sauce. 706 00:50:47,798 --> 00:50:49,299 And we have a fantastic rabbit. 707 00:50:49,299 --> 00:50:50,467 Rabbit! 708 00:50:54,096 --> 00:50:55,097 I love rabbit. 709 00:50:56,765 --> 00:50:59,268 I'll have the rabbit. Well done, please. 710 00:50:59,393 --> 00:51:02,479 And a bottle of your best chardonnay. 711 00:51:04,064 --> 00:51:05,774 She'll have salad and a water. 712 00:51:06,567 --> 00:51:07,860 Certainly. Very good. 713 00:51:08,986 --> 00:51:12,197 I hope my rabbit doesn't eat your salad. 714 00:51:17,161 --> 00:51:18,579 Sorry. 715 00:51:21,790 --> 00:51:24,793 Will you excuse me? I have to use the little girls' room. 716 00:51:33,886 --> 00:51:35,095 Oh, come on. 717 00:51:36,763 --> 00:51:38,473 Please! 718 00:51:49,067 --> 00:51:51,778 Where did he get that shirt? 719 00:51:51,778 --> 00:51:54,573 The skank. 720 00:51:54,698 --> 00:51:56,200 She's pretty. 721 00:51:58,160 --> 00:52:01,079 Why do exes look better when they're active? 722 00:52:01,163 --> 00:52:03,499 Why am I talking to myself in the mirror? 723 00:52:03,582 --> 00:52:05,375 Well then shut up. 724 00:52:14,885 --> 00:52:17,262 Why did the blonde jumped off the building? 725 00:52:17,387 --> 00:52:20,390 To see if the maxi pad had wings. 726 00:52:51,672 --> 00:52:53,590 Thank you. 727 00:52:53,674 --> 00:52:55,467 You're welcome. 728 00:53:01,390 --> 00:53:02,599 Hi. 729 00:53:04,184 --> 00:53:06,061 Wow! 730 00:53:06,061 --> 00:53:08,897 You look even more beautiful. 731 00:53:11,775 --> 00:53:14,486 What? Huh? No, thank you. 732 00:53:14,570 --> 00:53:16,488 Oh, no, no. I didn't ask you anything. 733 00:53:16,488 --> 00:53:19,992 I said that you look even more beautiful. 734 00:53:21,368 --> 00:53:25,164 Oh! You made this into a flower. That's so sweet. 735 00:53:25,289 --> 00:53:27,583 No, no, no. That wasn't me. That was the waiter. 736 00:53:29,793 --> 00:53:31,170 Oh. 737 00:53:32,963 --> 00:53:35,883 So, beautiful, 738 00:53:35,966 --> 00:53:37,676 where would you like to go after this? 739 00:53:37,801 --> 00:53:39,678 Why don't we figure that out later? 740 00:53:39,761 --> 00:53:42,764 Right now I just wanna sit in this chair and stay put. 741 00:53:44,266 --> 00:53:45,767 Or maybe not. 742 00:53:45,767 --> 00:53:47,895 You weigh 125 pounds, right? 743 00:53:49,563 --> 00:53:51,064 No! 744 00:53:51,190 --> 00:53:52,900 I'm 115. 745 00:53:53,775 --> 00:53:55,569 125. 746 00:53:57,070 --> 00:53:58,572 Here we are. 747 00:53:58,697 --> 00:54:03,660 A beautiful salad for a delightful lady. 748 00:54:03,785 --> 00:54:06,163 And the rabbit. 749 00:54:06,288 --> 00:54:07,789 Rabbit! 750 00:54:08,874 --> 00:54:11,001 Excuse me. 751 00:54:11,084 --> 00:54:14,171 Can you send a blue fucker on the rocks to that guy in the corner? 752 00:54:14,171 --> 00:54:15,297 Uh, mm-hm. 753 00:54:19,301 --> 00:54:20,594 I'll go first. 754 00:54:20,677 --> 00:54:22,971 Oh! I didn't know we were taking turns. 755 00:54:24,598 --> 00:54:28,602 Let's see. Your beauty is like a magic spell. 756 00:54:28,685 --> 00:54:31,480 So mysterious and tricky. 757 00:54:32,898 --> 00:54:34,983 Can make an angel lose his wings. 758 00:54:35,067 --> 00:54:38,195 Where's my wing? Where's my wing? 759 00:54:38,278 --> 00:54:40,489 But conquer any dragon. 760 00:54:43,784 --> 00:54:47,579 I hope you let me look inside because I'd really love to taste your treasure. 761 00:54:47,663 --> 00:54:50,582 Well, my treasure is under construction right now, so. 762 00:54:52,084 --> 00:54:53,085 Oh! 763 00:54:57,881 --> 00:54:58,882 Now you. 764 00:55:00,592 --> 00:55:01,593 Okay, uhm, 765 00:55:01,677 --> 00:55:04,471 Excuse me, sir. A blue fucker. 766 00:55:04,596 --> 00:55:06,598 Compliments of the young lady over there. 767 00:55:08,183 --> 00:55:09,184 Who's that? 768 00:55:12,479 --> 00:55:14,690 Your love spell has worked so well 769 00:55:14,773 --> 00:55:16,984 that it has taken control over my body 770 00:55:17,067 --> 00:55:20,779 and making me do things I would never do in my life. 771 00:55:20,863 --> 00:55:22,698 Oooh! 772 00:55:27,077 --> 00:55:29,371 Oh, shit! I'm sorry. 773 00:55:29,496 --> 00:55:30,998 No, no, don't worry about it. 774 00:55:30,998 --> 00:55:32,666 Don't worry about it. I got it, I got it. 775 00:55:34,293 --> 00:55:36,879 No, no. Tom, Tom, Tom. It's fine. No, sit down. 776 00:55:36,962 --> 00:55:38,672 No, no, no, no. It's fine. 777 00:55:38,797 --> 00:55:40,674 I swear, don't worry about it. No, no, no. 778 00:55:49,183 --> 00:55:51,768 Guess what? It ain't magic. 779 00:55:55,689 --> 00:55:57,774 And the wizard says to the little boy, 780 00:55:57,774 --> 00:56:00,194 "You can't do magic with your bare hands. 781 00:56:00,277 --> 00:56:03,697 You need a magical wand." Ding! 782 00:56:03,697 --> 00:56:04,865 Will you shut up! 783 00:56:06,492 --> 00:56:08,285 Stop it! 784 00:56:33,101 --> 00:56:35,187 What the hell is your problem? 785 00:56:35,270 --> 00:56:37,564 Do you realize you could have killed somebody? 786 00:56:37,564 --> 00:56:40,776 First of all top of the morning, sen~or. 787 00:56:40,901 --> 00:56:44,696 I'm sorry, officer. There was actually a big bee in the car. 788 00:56:46,365 --> 00:56:48,075 And I'm allergic. 789 00:56:48,200 --> 00:56:49,201 A bee? 790 00:56:51,078 --> 00:56:52,871 Sir, I'm gonna ask to search your vehicle. 791 00:56:53,038 --> 00:56:55,415 Could you please pop the trunk for me? 792 00:56:55,541 --> 00:56:57,125 Sure. 793 00:56:58,335 --> 00:56:59,336 Pop! 794 00:56:59,419 --> 00:57:01,338 There you go! 795 00:57:01,421 --> 00:57:02,631 So, what do we got? 796 00:57:02,631 --> 00:57:04,341 A couple of smart-asses. 797 00:57:06,635 --> 00:57:07,636 Whoa. 798 00:57:07,719 --> 00:57:10,305 We got ourselves a couple of bombers. 799 00:57:10,430 --> 00:57:11,807 Sure shit do. 800 00:57:11,932 --> 00:57:15,727 What the hell is wrong with you? 801 00:57:15,811 --> 00:57:18,313 Don't worry. Follow my lead. 802 00:57:18,438 --> 00:57:19,523 Don't move! 803 00:57:19,606 --> 00:57:22,025 You wanna tell me about what you got in the trunk? 804 00:57:22,109 --> 00:57:24,319 Yeah. I'm a magician. 805 00:57:24,444 --> 00:57:26,738 I didn't know magicians carried C4. 806 00:57:26,738 --> 00:57:28,407 What the hell is C4? 807 00:57:29,533 --> 00:57:32,744 C4 is actually a very powerful explosive. 808 00:57:32,828 --> 00:57:35,831 Explosive! Are you out of your mind? 809 00:57:35,831 --> 00:57:37,332 Wait, of course you are. 810 00:57:37,416 --> 00:57:39,710 I can explain. 811 00:57:39,835 --> 00:57:44,339 I'm doing a big underwater trick on The Tonight Show. 812 00:57:44,423 --> 00:57:47,009 And there's a big explosion at the end. That's all. 813 00:57:47,134 --> 00:57:49,845 That's it, all right. Out of the car. 814 00:57:49,928 --> 00:57:51,930 Step out of the car. You're under arrest. 815 00:57:52,014 --> 00:57:54,308 I'm gonna write a letter. 816 00:57:54,433 --> 00:57:56,226 Turn around. Hands behind your back. 817 00:57:56,226 --> 00:57:57,811 You have the right to remain silent. 818 00:57:57,936 --> 00:58:01,315 Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. 819 00:58:01,440 --> 00:58:02,608 You know the rest. 820 00:58:02,733 --> 00:58:05,944 This is a big misunderstanding. We're gonna be fine. 821 00:58:06,028 --> 00:58:07,613 They're not gonna do nothing to us. 822 00:58:08,238 --> 00:58:10,532 I need you to both remove all of your garments, please. 823 00:58:13,118 --> 00:58:14,536 Uhm, 824 00:58:14,620 --> 00:58:19,541 can we both do this separately? I mean, I hardly know this guy. 825 00:58:19,625 --> 00:58:22,211 Yeah. Well, that's what they all say. 826 00:58:22,211 --> 00:58:26,632 She doesn't feel comfortable taking off her clothes. Maybe we should... 827 00:58:35,307 --> 00:58:36,433 Either you do it 828 00:58:36,433 --> 00:58:38,727 or I do it for you. 829 00:58:40,229 --> 00:58:42,022 Okay. 830 00:58:59,832 --> 00:59:01,333 You're almost there. 831 00:59:01,416 --> 00:59:03,126 Please. 832 00:59:03,210 --> 00:59:06,713 Please, I am begging you. Please! 833 00:59:06,839 --> 00:59:08,423 Let me do this some place else. 834 00:59:19,518 --> 00:59:21,436 What is that? A mattress? 835 00:59:23,522 --> 00:59:26,733 All right. It's your turn, sir. 836 00:59:26,817 --> 00:59:28,110 Let's go. 837 00:59:50,841 --> 00:59:53,635 Well, I won't be giving her the cavity search, 838 00:59:53,719 --> 01:00:00,142 so... it looks like it's your lucky day, bastard. 839 01:00:00,934 --> 01:00:02,644 Drop 'em. 840 01:00:09,109 --> 01:00:11,028 Well, well, well. 841 01:00:11,111 --> 01:00:14,239 What do we have here? 842 01:00:22,039 --> 01:00:25,542 I was saving this trick for later. 843 01:00:43,644 --> 01:00:44,520 Magic! 844 01:00:55,030 --> 01:00:56,031 Hi. 845 01:00:56,114 --> 01:00:57,241 Hi. 846 01:01:01,829 --> 01:01:03,539 Can I ask you something? 847 01:01:03,539 --> 01:01:06,208 I'm not going anywhere. 848 01:01:06,208 --> 01:01:10,712 What made you get into your... profession? 849 01:01:12,714 --> 01:01:15,634 I found my boyfriend fucking another girl. 850 01:01:17,219 --> 01:01:20,722 That's it, that's it. I knew it. 851 01:01:21,807 --> 01:01:25,018 I'm joining your posse! 852 01:01:26,728 --> 01:01:31,233 I just need to get away from all this pain! 853 01:01:31,316 --> 01:01:32,818 You know what I realize? 854 01:01:32,943 --> 01:01:35,946 Some times you just gotta face the music and move on. 855 01:01:35,946 --> 01:01:42,119 Blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, right lady. 856 01:01:52,838 --> 01:01:57,509 "The hardest love to learn is that which is dark. 857 01:01:57,634 --> 01:02:01,013 "The kind that causes the most pain. 858 01:02:01,013 --> 01:02:05,309 "It is up to the soul to look past that dirty love 859 01:02:05,434 --> 01:02:10,522 "and regain the beauty that illuminated so bright before. 860 01:02:10,647 --> 01:02:12,524 Pure love." 861 01:02:14,109 --> 01:02:16,236 Yeah, right. 862 01:02:16,236 --> 01:02:22,534 My white pony is probably in a glue factory by now. 863 01:02:47,309 --> 01:02:51,939 Listen, I... I had to sleep with a 70-year old man for two years 864 01:02:52,022 --> 01:02:53,524 to get that ring. 865 01:02:53,607 --> 01:02:55,609 You should have kept your legs together. 866 01:02:55,734 --> 01:02:57,236 You are an asshole. 867 01:02:57,319 --> 01:02:58,320 You're a slut! 868 01:02:58,445 --> 01:03:01,031 I'm aware of that but it's three karats. 869 01:03:05,828 --> 01:03:07,037 Hi! 870 01:03:10,123 --> 01:03:12,042 What have you got for me? 871 01:03:12,042 --> 01:03:14,419 A 1968 Martin V 18. 872 01:03:14,545 --> 01:03:19,633 A... a '59 Gretch Duo Jet. A '59 Country Western 873 01:03:19,716 --> 01:03:22,010 and a... a 66 Khoner. 874 01:03:23,720 --> 01:03:25,722 The '66 Khoner, can I see it, please? 875 01:03:25,848 --> 01:03:27,432 Yeah. 876 01:03:27,432 --> 01:03:28,642 Yeah, sure. 877 01:03:36,942 --> 01:03:37,943 Do you like it? 878 01:03:47,828 --> 01:03:49,538 I cannot believe my eyes. 879 01:03:51,039 --> 01:03:53,917 This is the very guitar I played for my wife at our wedding. 880 01:03:55,210 --> 01:03:57,421 Are you sure it was that very guitar? 881 01:03:57,546 --> 01:03:59,840 Yes. You see this? 882 01:03:59,923 --> 01:04:02,509 R is Rajul, me. 883 01:04:02,634 --> 01:04:04,219 M is for Moronah, my wife. 884 01:04:04,344 --> 01:04:05,929 I... I always wondered what that meant. 885 01:04:06,013 --> 01:04:09,141 That's... it's pretty amazing, huh? 886 01:04:09,224 --> 01:04:11,518 No, no. It was meant to be. 887 01:04:13,020 --> 01:04:15,814 I always knew it would come back to me. 888 01:04:15,939 --> 01:04:17,733 How much do you want for it? 889 01:04:17,816 --> 01:04:19,526 Name your price. 890 01:04:19,610 --> 01:04:21,320 The others you can keep. I have no need for them. 891 01:04:23,322 --> 01:04:24,823 $3,000? 892 01:04:32,748 --> 01:04:33,749 Done. 893 01:04:35,417 --> 01:04:37,628 Wait. Wait. 894 01:04:40,631 --> 01:04:42,925 Here's another $500. 895 01:04:42,925 --> 01:04:44,510 Thank you for taking such good care of it. 896 01:04:45,636 --> 01:04:49,139 You are very, very welcome. Thank, thank you. 897 01:04:49,223 --> 01:04:51,308 All right. Uhm, 898 01:04:52,434 --> 01:04:53,727 good day. 899 01:05:06,114 --> 01:05:07,741 What are you doing? 900 01:05:07,825 --> 01:05:09,743 I'm practicing. Gosh! 901 01:05:09,827 --> 01:05:11,245 For what? 902 01:05:11,245 --> 01:05:14,540 It's a new kind of mating call I read in some onion newspaper. 903 01:05:14,623 --> 01:05:17,417 It subconsciously attracts men to women. 904 01:05:17,543 --> 01:05:19,336 By making your nose squeak? 905 01:05:19,419 --> 01:05:22,714 Yeah. Why do you think I had so many dates this week? 906 01:05:22,840 --> 01:05:24,049 'Cause you were a ho? 907 01:05:24,132 --> 01:05:26,134 Hey, John will drive us tonight, right? 908 01:05:26,218 --> 01:05:27,511 No doubt. 909 01:05:27,636 --> 01:05:31,431 Oh, my God! Look at this. Look! 910 01:05:31,431 --> 01:05:34,143 Why does it have to go here and not my boobs? 911 01:05:34,226 --> 01:05:37,646 What you need to do is get your titties done like me. 912 01:05:37,646 --> 01:05:40,315 I might be hungry but I look good! 913 01:05:40,440 --> 01:05:42,526 I think I'm leaning on one of your boobs. 914 01:05:43,610 --> 01:05:46,029 I can't wait to see this band play. 915 01:05:46,029 --> 01:05:49,032 Yeah. Well, just don't puke all over the mosh pit and you should be pretty good. 916 01:05:49,032 --> 01:05:52,619 Oh, my God. I totally forgot about that. 917 01:05:52,619 --> 01:05:54,913 Some asshole slipped me a mickey. 918 01:05:55,038 --> 01:05:56,832 That was your boyfriend, Carrie. 919 01:05:56,915 --> 01:05:58,625 Holy shit, you're right! 920 01:05:58,709 --> 01:06:00,711 It's all coming back to me now. 921 01:06:00,836 --> 01:06:03,130 He kept wanting me to go in his van. 922 01:06:03,130 --> 01:06:05,841 You have to be more careful on who you pick up. 923 01:06:05,841 --> 01:06:08,135 Why do you think I stopped dating grips? 924 01:06:08,135 --> 01:06:11,346 I caught him pretty quick and they have absolutely no say on the casting process. 925 01:06:11,430 --> 01:06:13,640 You've been going at this for six years now. 926 01:06:13,724 --> 01:06:16,143 It probably wouldn't hurt to get in some acting classes. 927 01:06:16,226 --> 01:06:20,939 Nah. I don't like how they want you to go deep inside yourself and think. 928 01:06:21,023 --> 01:06:24,443 Hurts my head all that. Find your inner child. 929 01:06:24,443 --> 01:06:28,030 My inner child is a dark muddy tunnel. 930 01:06:28,113 --> 01:06:30,032 I don't wanna step foot in it. 931 01:06:30,115 --> 01:06:31,825 What I can tell you from experience, 932 01:06:31,950 --> 01:06:35,245 once you face the music, you just might see that light at the end of the tunnel. 933 01:06:35,329 --> 01:06:38,332 Honey, my light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. 934 01:06:40,626 --> 01:06:42,336 Oh, let's go, people! 935 01:06:43,712 --> 01:06:46,715 Who's the best designated driver in the whole world? 936 01:06:46,840 --> 01:06:48,342 John is! 937 01:06:49,343 --> 01:06:51,345 Wow, I feel really buzzed. 938 01:06:51,428 --> 01:06:53,722 That's 'cause I put yak in your drink. 939 01:06:53,847 --> 01:06:55,140 Thank you. 940 01:06:55,140 --> 01:06:56,433 You're welcome. 941 01:06:56,517 --> 01:07:00,521 Oh, look at these girls. They're chickies. 942 01:07:04,024 --> 01:07:05,651 Hi. 943 01:07:05,734 --> 01:07:07,820 Hey, man, are you, are you gay? 944 01:07:10,614 --> 01:07:12,324 No. 945 01:07:12,449 --> 01:07:15,536 Oh, man, you gotta be gay. 'Cause that's the only way a hot chicks like that 946 01:07:15,619 --> 01:07:17,246 would be sitting with a twinky like you. 947 01:07:23,627 --> 01:07:24,545 Hey, pork chop. 948 01:07:25,712 --> 01:07:26,839 Yeah. 949 01:07:26,922 --> 01:07:28,549 You're just a bit jealous, 950 01:07:28,632 --> 01:07:31,009 because you pump so many steroids into your body 951 01:07:31,009 --> 01:07:33,720 that your dicks have completely shriveled up. 952 01:07:33,720 --> 01:07:36,723 Now him, on the other hand. 953 01:07:39,518 --> 01:07:40,727 She's right. 954 01:07:40,811 --> 01:07:43,438 He's always hard and makes me wet all day long. 955 01:07:46,525 --> 01:07:49,444 He can tear that ass up. You know what I'm saying? 956 01:07:49,528 --> 01:07:51,530 All up in it donkey-style. 957 01:07:59,621 --> 01:08:02,124 No. Let's go, man. Let's go. 958 01:08:07,629 --> 01:08:09,423 That was awesome. 959 01:08:09,423 --> 01:08:13,010 I think I got one of his oily chest hairs in my mouth. 960 01:08:13,010 --> 01:08:16,722 Rebecca, I can stick up for myself sometimes, you know. 961 01:08:16,847 --> 01:08:19,433 I know. Just helping out a friend, that's all. 962 01:08:21,018 --> 01:08:23,520 You know, you're kinda cute when you get turned on. 963 01:08:23,645 --> 01:08:25,731 I was not turned on. 964 01:08:26,732 --> 01:08:27,941 I beg to differ. 965 01:08:31,320 --> 01:08:33,238 Well, what do you expect? 966 01:08:34,448 --> 01:08:37,534 I'm just saying, you know. I'm impressed. 967 01:08:40,037 --> 01:08:41,747 See me in the shower. 968 01:08:43,749 --> 01:08:44,917 Is that an invitation? 969 01:08:49,630 --> 01:08:52,049 I'm drunk. 970 01:08:54,426 --> 01:08:56,136 Come on! 971 01:08:56,136 --> 01:08:59,348 Here's to the men that we love. 972 01:08:59,431 --> 01:09:01,934 Here's to the men that love us. 973 01:09:02,017 --> 01:09:05,020 But the men that we love will never love us 974 01:09:05,145 --> 01:09:07,731 so fuck all the men. Here's to us! 975 01:09:07,731 --> 01:09:09,233 Word! 976 01:09:12,528 --> 01:09:15,614 Oh, God! I can't believe he's here. 977 01:09:15,739 --> 01:09:16,740 Who? 978 01:09:16,740 --> 01:09:19,243 Robert Rodale. 979 01:09:19,243 --> 01:09:21,745 That guy is probably the worst director 980 01:09:21,745 --> 01:09:25,249 on the face of the planet. I've seen every single one of his films. 981 01:09:25,249 --> 01:09:27,751 By now he's doing his 100 million dollar piece of crap 982 01:09:27,751 --> 01:09:29,837 called Night vision. 983 01:09:29,920 --> 01:09:32,422 It's about some guy who can see in the dark or something. 984 01:09:32,548 --> 01:09:33,632 Who really cares? 985 01:09:33,715 --> 01:09:35,425 When does he start shooting? 986 01:09:36,552 --> 01:09:38,136 I don't know. 987 01:09:38,220 --> 01:09:40,848 Okay, Carrie, here we go. 988 01:09:42,641 --> 01:09:44,434 Ha! 989 01:09:45,519 --> 01:09:46,812 Perfect. 990 01:09:51,733 --> 01:09:54,736 That girl never ceases to amaze me. 991 01:09:56,238 --> 01:09:57,531 I don't believe it. 992 01:09:58,740 --> 01:10:00,951 You need to believe it 'cause I live with her. 993 01:10:00,951 --> 01:10:04,329 No, no, Richard's here. 994 01:10:07,040 --> 01:10:09,751 Why do people have to bump into their exes when we get past them? 995 01:10:09,835 --> 01:10:12,921 Can't they just die after we're done with them? 996 01:10:13,046 --> 01:10:14,631 Do you want me to go ask him to leave? 997 01:10:14,631 --> 01:10:19,052 No. No. No. Thanks, doll. 998 01:10:19,136 --> 01:10:22,222 I'm just gonna deal with this the only way I know how. 999 01:10:24,224 --> 01:10:27,227 Becca, maybe you should just slow... 1000 01:10:27,227 --> 01:10:29,938 Oh, poo-poo on you. 1001 01:10:30,022 --> 01:10:31,940 I wanna dance. Come on. 1002 01:10:31,940 --> 01:10:33,650 John, is that you? 1003 01:10:33,650 --> 01:10:37,237 I knew we were totally meant to be together. 1004 01:10:37,237 --> 01:10:40,824 Come on, girl, let's drop it like it's hot. Come on. 1005 01:10:42,743 --> 01:10:44,745 You wanna drop it like it's hot? Come here! 1006 01:12:45,157 --> 01:12:47,075 You believe in destiny? 1007 01:12:48,494 --> 01:12:49,578 I used to. 1008 01:12:49,661 --> 01:12:51,288 Wow, really? 1009 01:12:51,371 --> 01:12:54,374 I was always thinking about becoming a scientologist. 1010 01:12:54,458 --> 01:12:55,876 They're always famous, you know. 1011 01:12:55,876 --> 01:12:57,794 Is there like an audition or something? 1012 01:12:57,878 --> 01:13:01,381 I could do a monologue from Ron L. Hubbart. 1013 01:13:47,469 --> 01:13:49,680 Why? 1014 01:13:49,680 --> 01:13:51,974 You're right. She does look better from a distance. 1015 01:13:52,975 --> 01:13:55,060 I don't know why. 1016 01:13:55,185 --> 01:13:57,062 Why don't you just leave us alone? 1017 01:13:57,187 --> 01:13:59,189 No, I think you do know why. 1018 01:13:59,273 --> 01:14:01,275 Because the night before you did this, we looked at each other 1019 01:14:01,358 --> 01:14:03,277 and said that we would always be together. 1020 01:14:05,779 --> 01:14:06,864 And I believed you. 1021 01:14:06,989 --> 01:14:09,992 This was over a long time ago, Rebecca. 1022 01:14:11,577 --> 01:14:13,162 You just weren't giving me what it was what I needed. 1023 01:14:13,162 --> 01:14:14,872 And what was that? Gonorrhea? 1024 01:14:14,955 --> 01:14:16,373 Sh, sh. 1025 01:14:16,456 --> 01:14:18,792 Get over yourself, Rebecca. Okay? 1026 01:14:18,792 --> 01:14:20,377 I don't give a shit about you. 1027 01:14:20,460 --> 01:14:22,671 I don't know if I ever did. 1028 01:14:22,671 --> 01:14:24,590 Why don't you just get the fuck away from us, huh? 1029 01:14:38,562 --> 01:14:42,483 You see? I told you. 1030 01:14:42,483 --> 01:14:44,485 You and me. You and me. 1031 01:14:49,156 --> 01:14:52,284 Hi. That was so hot. 1032 01:14:55,370 --> 01:14:56,371 Rebecca! 1033 01:15:04,087 --> 01:15:05,672 Fuck! 1034 01:15:05,756 --> 01:15:07,382 Excuse me! 1035 01:15:14,181 --> 01:15:15,182 Yeah? 1036 01:15:15,265 --> 01:15:16,767 Do you wanna have sex? 1037 01:15:16,892 --> 01:15:18,060 What? 1038 01:15:18,060 --> 01:15:19,978 I'm totally gonna have sex with you. 1039 01:15:23,190 --> 01:15:24,775 What do I gotta do? 1040 01:15:24,858 --> 01:15:27,861 Nothing. I mean, you can try a cheesy line on me but why bother. 1041 01:15:27,986 --> 01:15:30,781 What I'm telling you is no matter what you do you're gonna get laid. 1042 01:15:32,366 --> 01:15:33,492 I don't get it! 1043 01:15:33,575 --> 01:15:35,369 But you're going to. 1044 01:15:38,288 --> 01:15:39,373 Let's go. 1045 01:15:46,380 --> 01:15:47,673 Can I buy you a drink? 1046 01:15:48,966 --> 01:15:51,093 I don't know. Can you? 1047 01:15:52,469 --> 01:15:54,763 I was thinking about getting my boobs done. 1048 01:15:54,888 --> 01:15:56,890 But then I decided not to. 1049 01:15:56,974 --> 01:15:58,892 You wouldn't be able to see my inner beauty. 1050 01:15:58,892 --> 01:16:02,187 I would just be like every other manufactured Barbie doll in this town. 1051 01:16:02,271 --> 01:16:05,274 Just seeking constant attention from every one. 1052 01:16:05,274 --> 01:16:08,068 Hey... are you listening to me? 1053 01:16:08,193 --> 01:16:10,863 I wouldn't let a plastic surgeon go near. 1054 01:16:10,988 --> 01:16:12,489 I wouldn't go that far. 1055 01:16:12,573 --> 01:16:15,868 I could have my nose done and I could have collagen put in my lips. 1056 01:16:15,993 --> 01:16:19,580 And you can be damn sure when I turn 35, I'm getting the full face pull. 1057 01:16:19,663 --> 01:16:20,956 Hey, baby. 1058 01:16:20,956 --> 01:16:22,374 Where have you been? 1059 01:16:22,457 --> 01:16:23,876 Right here waiting for you. 1060 01:16:26,795 --> 01:16:28,297 Who's she? 1061 01:16:28,297 --> 01:16:30,757 Just some skank who wants in my movie. 1062 01:16:30,883 --> 01:16:33,385 Hey asshole, I heard that. 1063 01:16:33,469 --> 01:16:34,761 Good! 1064 01:16:34,887 --> 01:16:37,473 You know, one day I'm gonna be big 1065 01:16:37,473 --> 01:16:38,974 and you'll be sorry. 1066 01:16:39,057 --> 01:16:41,977 Sure, sweetheart. From your lips to God's ears. 1067 01:16:42,060 --> 01:16:44,062 So why don't you go find another dick to suck? 1068 01:16:44,188 --> 01:16:45,898 'Cause my movie is cast. 1069 01:16:48,192 --> 01:16:49,359 You know what? 1070 01:16:49,485 --> 01:16:51,361 It's guys like you that make girls think 1071 01:16:51,487 --> 01:16:53,489 they have to play your tickle my dick game 1072 01:16:53,572 --> 01:16:55,991 to get anywhere in this fucking town. 1073 01:16:56,074 --> 01:16:57,784 Not anymore. 1074 01:16:57,868 --> 01:17:00,287 In fact, why don't you take care of your own pencil dick 1075 01:17:00,370 --> 01:17:02,372 and give the new girls in this town a little bit of time 1076 01:17:02,498 --> 01:17:05,876 to show their stuff before you rape them of any chance they've got. 1077 01:17:07,586 --> 01:17:10,297 There're some people over for an after-hour. You're welcome to join us. 1078 01:17:11,256 --> 01:17:14,092 What? Your mommy out of town? 1079 01:17:14,092 --> 01:17:15,886 That's funny. 1080 01:17:20,766 --> 01:17:21,683 So, 1081 01:17:23,560 --> 01:17:24,561 you good in bed? 1082 01:17:24,686 --> 01:17:27,064 'Cause if you're gonna point and shoot, 1083 01:17:27,189 --> 01:17:28,774 then I ain't interested. 1084 01:17:28,774 --> 01:17:32,569 You see, a woman needs some warm up, you know. 1085 01:17:32,694 --> 01:17:35,280 Some pregame. You know what I'm saying? 1086 01:17:36,281 --> 01:17:37,574 You know you're white, right? 1087 01:17:37,658 --> 01:17:39,368 Don't you ever call me that. 1088 01:17:41,787 --> 01:17:44,373 You're kinda cute for a white boy. 1089 01:17:44,373 --> 01:17:47,584 Hey, Michelle, let's get out of here. 1090 01:17:47,584 --> 01:17:48,961 I was gonna go to this... 1091 01:17:49,086 --> 01:17:50,879 No, let's just go. 1092 01:17:52,089 --> 01:17:54,883 All right. I gotta go. 1093 01:17:54,967 --> 01:17:56,468 That's cool. I'll see you later. 1094 01:18:02,182 --> 01:18:06,061 What the fuck was that, you fucking pussy? You let her get away? 1095 01:18:06,061 --> 01:18:08,772 I was onstage with a fucking girl. I was gonna fuck her! 1096 01:18:12,359 --> 01:18:14,862 You like what I'm doing, baby? 1097 01:18:14,987 --> 01:18:16,363 Yeah, just don't talk. 1098 01:18:27,082 --> 01:18:29,585 What the hell? Ouch! 1099 01:18:31,086 --> 01:18:34,173 It's not bubble gum. You don't chew it. 1100 01:18:35,465 --> 01:18:38,969 Sorry. I... I can, I can do it better. 1101 01:18:39,094 --> 01:18:40,679 No. No. 1102 01:18:42,764 --> 01:18:44,183 I can't do this. 1103 01:18:44,183 --> 01:18:46,477 This is so stupid. I'm not gonna sleep with you. 1104 01:18:46,560 --> 01:18:48,479 Come on! Just give me another chance. 1105 01:18:49,563 --> 01:18:50,898 It's not you, it's me. 1106 01:18:50,981 --> 01:18:53,358 Why the hell the chicks always say that? 1107 01:18:53,484 --> 01:18:57,196 I don't know. Hormones, morals, 12 years of catholic school. 1108 01:18:59,865 --> 01:19:01,366 All right. 1109 01:19:01,492 --> 01:19:02,868 Can we see each other again? 1110 01:19:02,993 --> 01:19:05,579 I don't wanna see anybody for a while. 1111 01:19:05,662 --> 01:19:07,998 At least till I know it's right. 1112 01:19:10,959 --> 01:19:12,794 But let me give you a tip. 1113 01:19:12,878 --> 01:19:15,964 Buy yourself a mango, cut it in half and practice. 1114 01:19:35,275 --> 01:19:37,069 What's wrong with girls? 1115 01:19:37,194 --> 01:19:39,488 Why do we feel the need to sleep with someone for revenge? 1116 01:19:39,571 --> 01:19:42,282 I don't know how we let guys make us feel this way. 1117 01:19:42,282 --> 01:19:44,493 We're supposed to be spiritually stronger than men, 1118 01:19:44,576 --> 01:19:47,079 yet I feel like we are so much weaker. 1119 01:19:47,162 --> 01:19:50,582 I don't know. Maybe we do it because we need to feel wanted. 1120 01:19:52,668 --> 01:19:55,295 Maybe it's just to fill that deep dark hole 1121 01:19:55,379 --> 01:19:58,674 to make some of that pain go away. A little company. 1122 01:20:01,260 --> 01:20:04,388 Or maybe it's okay to just take time and go through things alone. 1123 01:20:06,473 --> 01:20:09,977 God! Why does love have to be so cruel? 1124 01:21:14,791 --> 01:21:16,585 Why did you do this, John? 1125 01:21:16,668 --> 01:21:18,587 I did it 'cause... 1126 01:21:20,172 --> 01:21:22,674 Becca, you're the most beautiful girl in the world 1127 01:21:22,800 --> 01:21:26,094 and when you are happy you face lights up so much 1128 01:21:26,094 --> 01:21:27,888 and I hated seeing you unhappy. 1129 01:21:27,971 --> 01:21:31,266 And I knew that if I got you this stuff, 1130 01:21:31,391 --> 01:21:35,270 your world would come together and would, and would make your life better 1131 01:21:35,270 --> 01:21:39,775 and... you deserve the best life in the world. 1132 01:21:56,500 --> 01:21:58,085 I can't. 1133 01:22:00,963 --> 01:22:02,589 I can't do this. 1134 01:22:02,673 --> 01:22:03,674 No. 1135 01:22:06,760 --> 01:22:08,679 It just won't work. 1136 01:22:12,975 --> 01:22:13,976 Why? 1137 01:22:14,059 --> 01:22:15,686 I'm sorry. 1138 01:22:38,375 --> 01:22:39,793 John! 1139 01:22:41,670 --> 01:22:42,880 John. 1140 01:23:37,100 --> 01:23:38,268 John. 1141 01:23:39,269 --> 01:23:40,979 John. 1142 01:23:41,063 --> 01:23:44,274 Please, John, just get in the car. I'm begging you. 1143 01:23:45,692 --> 01:23:48,570 Listen, I never meant to hurt you. 1144 01:23:48,570 --> 01:23:50,072 I've been through so much 1145 01:23:50,072 --> 01:23:53,200 that... I just can't handle being in a relationship right now. 1146 01:23:53,200 --> 01:23:55,369 Rebecca, do you know that I've been in love with you 1147 01:23:55,494 --> 01:23:57,287 since the very first moment I saw you? 1148 01:23:58,497 --> 01:24:00,499 I really thought that if I was patient, 1149 01:24:00,499 --> 01:24:03,961 things would just work itself out, and I sat there and I watched. 1150 01:24:03,961 --> 01:24:07,673 When it just seemed like you'd rather be with someone who treated you like shit 1151 01:24:07,673 --> 01:24:10,592 than someone who really fucking cared about you! 1152 01:24:12,177 --> 01:24:14,763 Here I am, Rebecca. Here I am. 1153 01:24:18,267 --> 01:24:21,395 You know, I'm putting my heart on the line here 1154 01:24:21,395 --> 01:24:22,896 and you don't seem to care at all. 1155 01:24:24,064 --> 01:24:28,193 I do... I do. 1156 01:24:29,278 --> 01:24:30,279 Why? 1157 01:24:36,577 --> 01:24:37,786 Why? 1158 01:24:40,873 --> 01:24:41,874 Forget it. 1159 01:24:43,500 --> 01:24:46,378 You know? I think I'd really rather take the bus. 1160 01:24:50,466 --> 01:24:52,176 I'm scared. 1161 01:24:58,182 --> 01:24:59,183 Fuck! 1162 01:25:32,299 --> 01:25:33,300 Pony. 1163 01:25:37,179 --> 01:25:38,680 White pony. 1164 01:25:42,100 --> 01:25:45,062 You're my white pony. 1165 01:25:48,899 --> 01:25:53,570 I guess what we're supposed to do is find someone whose soul illuminates as bright as yours. 1166 01:25:53,695 --> 01:25:55,697 To grow with in all the right ways. 1167 01:25:57,074 --> 01:26:01,078 John, you're my white pony. Yeah! 1168 01:26:01,161 --> 01:26:02,371 Stop the bus. Hey! 1169 01:26:03,664 --> 01:26:04,998 Stop the bus! 1170 01:26:05,082 --> 01:26:06,291 Becca! 1171 01:26:11,380 --> 01:26:12,464 Are you all right? 1172 01:26:14,174 --> 01:26:15,300 John. 1173 01:26:16,885 --> 01:26:18,762 You're my white pony! 1174 01:26:35,779 --> 01:26:37,489 Once you let go of dirty love, 1175 01:26:37,573 --> 01:26:41,368 your heart can open up to the highest love of all... pure love. 1176 01:26:43,162 --> 01:26:46,165 The kind of love you've waited your whole life for. 1177 01:27:23,285 --> 01:27:26,079 Just fucking globs of that! 1178 01:27:30,000 --> 01:27:31,585 That's good. 1179 01:27:31,585 --> 01:27:33,587 That was beautiful. 1180 01:27:34,880 --> 01:27:36,089 Thanks. 1181 01:27:42,387 --> 01:27:43,764 I got to go. 1182 01:27:46,975 --> 01:27:49,978 Take once a day to avoid outbreaks. 1183 01:27:50,103 --> 01:27:51,480 This is amazing. 1184 01:27:51,563 --> 01:27:54,566 I can't wait to tell my friends all about it. 1185 01:28:07,663 --> 01:28:09,164 Es ma'gico. 1186 01:28:12,000 --> 01:28:17,089 Touch my bass. 1187 01:28:17,172 --> 01:28:19,883 Touch my fucking bass. 1188 01:28:24,429 --> 01:28:25,514 Yeah?