Visit www.Markasjudi.com Trusted Secure Online Gambling Agents
Years & 80s and 90s is a political storm,
pop culture , sports,
and new innovative music genres called hip-hop
Hip-hop is an audible board,
Revealing problems that hit hard facing black Americans.
Steve Young reported on new types of cocaine, called cracks.
Health officials said there had been a dramatic increase in AIDS
in black and Hispanic communities.
Young America...
hold your head right now.
We can win.
In a time of great need from comic reliefs,
stand-up comedies exploded.
But many underground black comedians hasn't made the same breakthrough as
as a hip-hop musician.
Seeing the vacancy,
Russell Simmons partnered with comedy director Stan Lathan,
and together, they built a team
for find and develop new and edgy comedy sounds
that utilize the same raw energy hip-hop
Then on July 1, 1992,
>
Def Comedy Jam crashes into the airwaves.
Tonight, Def Comedy is at 25.
Starring Bill Bellamy, Cedric the Entertainer,
Deon Cole, Dave Chappelle, Melanie Comarcho,
Mike Epps, Adele Givens, Eddie Griffin,
Tiffany Haddish, Kevin Hart, Steve Harvey, </ p >
DL Hughley, Ice Cube, Martin Lawrence,
Tracy Morgan, Trevor Noah, Craig Robinson,
Sheryl Underwood and Katt Williams.
Welcome to the stage, Steve Harvey,
Sheryl Underwood, Cedric the Entertainer
and Dave Chappelle!
Yes!
Build your feet!
- yes! Yes! - What happened ?
- Yes! - This room is legendary, man.
- Already! - Oh, this is crazy out there, man.
All right, everyone, sit down
and be prepared for some public school readings.
Def jam jam comedy 25.
all wonder the same thing:
Will Katt Williams appear?
Yes!
Oh, he is there.
That's it.
I don't know he's there.
I won't say that if I see you on there
Yes!
I'm not used to silence, introspective Katt Williams.
No.
But I ask this:
When did you ever see a lot of heavy hitters
all together at the same time in the same room?
- Yes. - Right
And I tell you something. You look good too, man. </ P>
Yes, you did. You look good.
So, tonight, if nothing else,
Black lifestyle is important.
- Right! - good
Yes. </ P>
And, Steve, we are here to celebrate 25 years
of a comedy institution. </ P>
And I want to announce it that I will star in Tracy Morgan
in The Tracy Morgan Story.
I have weight, and if I just take off this wig,
you will leave, "That slut looks like Tracy Morgan."
No, I'll do it Cedric the Entertainer's story,
but I haven't lost enough weight to become Cedric
I do, bastard Dirt. </ P>
From 1992 to 1997, Def Comedy Jam was a watercooler show
that you should see
Def Jam is responsible for stolen cables
than other television shows.
That's right, that's true. Speak real, real talk
Oh, this my turn is
I think this is a bastard I think I can't read.
Damn, I've arrived here too.
Now, for some of You millennium who might ask,
- "What is Def Comedy Jam?" - What?
That's why we hate you little bastard
- You don't know what what. - Right.
Right. Right.
We also have emojis. What about this one?
There are no prohibited subjects.
That is what comics will feel As he pushes the envelope.
Push the envelope? Dirt.
We pushed, licked, branded and sent the whore!
- Should I say that "bastard"? - No, you understand
- Should we add more profanity? - No, "the bitch's mail" is good.
Pushed, licked, stamped, sucked the bastard Half dead
Rumbling, youth! Rumbling. Is that nonsense?
Um...
I host the Big Big Shots.
Oh shit. Oh shit. He becomes mainstream in us.
You won't sit on here and mess up my money. Unh-huh.
No no.
I won't have me here cursing and annoying.
p>
- Hi, CBS! - I got a lot of checks now.
Unh-unh.
- ABC, CBS. - Cuss to yourself...
You won't be on CBS. Yes. </ P>
Donkey I will have a job When we are done with this here .
Sit here, MF and all this here.
Damn, I'm nervous now.
Oh man.
to bring urban comedy to the mainstream.
- Yes! - Yeah.
- Because people like Shuckey Duckey... - Kwek kwek! </ P>
- and Hamburger... - Meatballs! </ P>
have something that the world needs to hear. </ P>
What is this, Steve? </ P>
I'm just...
I don't know anything it can already
You don't need to comment everything.
You said I would be your hype man!
There is a teleprompter. Some of this nonsense must go.
I don't mean to say that. I didn't mean to say that.
A little big shot A little big shot
- Come on. - My turn.
Right.
The day after they signed the agreement,
they officially explained to HBO that "urban" means "Negro."
What?!
And their vision of urban comedy was born, and then chitlins fall from the sky.
High blood pressure!
The blackest thing they did was to hire a black man from Italy from the Bronx. </ p >
- Fuhgeddaboudit! - Legendary Kid Capri!
- You are here, Capri! - Yes! Kid Capri!
You can't go out on stage except Kid who names your name
- Okay, wait, let me be serious. - seriously
So, Russell Simmons and Stan Lathan see comedians like Robin Harris
at the Comedy Act Theater here in LA. </ P>
- Yes. - Yes, man.
And then there's the whole Uptown Comedy Club Circuit in Harlem.
And they realize There's nothing like that on television.
It feels like hip-hop early.
It feels like a secret only a skin person black knows.
Then Russell and Stan, they added a big Hollywood manager:
Sandy Wernick Sandy, what's wrong, man? </ p >
- Sandy Wernick in the building. - Oh yeah.
They have to register this person, because they both look around
and they are like , "We tried to get this on TV, but we were black. </ P>
We will need Jews." </ P>
Yes. </ P>
And they ask a man with extraordinary eyes for talent:
- eyes! - Bob Sumner, man!
Bob Sumner. Shouts come out Bob Sumner, man.
Bob goes around...
Wait. I will neglect if I don't show
Bob beat me up Three times he first sees me.
- Wait a minute, Ced. - That's right, Bob. </ P>
- Wait a minute. He also struck me. - No! </ P>
- That's what I want say - He also struck me.
Bob will be like, "You know, The third time I met Halle Berry,
I realized he was a little cute."
On a serious note, we owe a lot of thanks
- to the people at the table there. - Of course
Many stars are born because of the eyes of the people there.
Right.
I love you Thank you very much for what You do it for us
and for our genre. </ P>
- Thank you guys. - Thank you very much. Thank you
Let's show this event, women and men.
Right now, this is my pleasure to bring to the stage
the only Tracy Morgan .
Yes! Yes!
You're here
Yo.
Yes!
What, what, what else?!
Holler to me!
Oh man.
Thank you.
Thank you a lot.
You know the journey that I just released, and I miss you
I miss you hard, and I'm here, and we have fun.
Wait a minute. Something is missing.
Something went wrong. Something missing.
We have experienced all this, but something is missing, boo.
Something went wrong.
Martin!
Martin Lawrence.
Look at this That bust.
25 years ago, I was a hungry young comic trying to find my way in this game, man.
And Bung came from nowhere and said, "Come eat at my desk." </ P>
Just like you with your artist, Puff. </ P>
He did that with me. < br /> He is my OG. He will always be my OG.
I love you. That will never stop.
The word is born < br /> Word of birth
Thank you!
My family and I thank you for giving me a chance, Martin.
I love you so much.
That's a word of life.
You know what I'm saying? I saw it...
I sat up there, I saw it. My sister Jim and I went to the show.
The first show I saw, I looked at it and something came up to me.
I know what I want to do because of you, with my life
He's funny. He used to blow it up. He used to guess the audience. </ P>
Yo, look at this nonsense here. </ P>
Go, Martin! < br /> Go, Martin!
Do white flight attendants choose who they want to say goodbye?
It could be like four white people, and then you're the fifth.
And they go, "Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Okay, goodbye, now. See you later."
Apa kabar'?
Itu banyak menenun rambut, lho.
Ada seekor kuda botak di Central Park.
Anda pernah tulang seorang gadis begitu baik,
he looks back at your butt... I mean, with confusion?
Like, "who are you?"
You hit it, bro, bro. > He turned around like this. </ P>
Now...
Is that me...
or hotter than a bastard here?
What is that? I think this is me.
Let me wipe it.
Thank you!
Women and men,
welcome Martin Lawrence
Humans. How are you doing?
Wow, wow, wow. It's just...
You look good. So many beautiful people here tonight.
What
Good. Return to you, baby Ow! </ P>
Bad people make it difficult. Bad people. </ P>
About 25 years ago,
Russell Simmons and Stan Lathan employ raw young people
who used to think they could be boxers.
But I have to get out of the game After I kept my eyes swole. </ P>
But they asked me to host
of what would be the hottest Stand-up comedy show in history: </ p >
Def Comedy Jam.
So, I pay tribute to you for what you have done for me
and all of us who come here and do our thing on this stage.
I am grateful, and I also thank all of you, spectators, fans,
who supported this show for this is
and helps us survive as long as we survive.
So, I am very grateful. God bless.
I mean, it's amazing.
The music is hot, the audience.
It's like a place you want to be.
You have Showtime in Apollo , that's really good,
But there's something raw about Def Comedy Jam.
It feels really New York.
That's another thing about Def Jam.
You know, everything on TV feels like Hollywood.
Even Saturday Night Live It feels like Hollywood, you know? </ P>
"Living from New York, we are Hollywood!" </ P>
No. But there is something about Def Jam
that feels dirty and New York-ish. </ P>
Def Comedy Jam introduces comics You will never see the opposite.
I mean, Bernie Mac like Satchel Paige who stands tall.
You know what I mean? He killed him for years.
Nobody put it on TV. Def Comedy Jam puts it on TV,
and he, you know, Mega stars are basically two years after that.
Chris Tucker.
Sheryl Underwood:
The dirtiest comedian <br
I don't know if there is anyone I want to follow less than Sheryl Underwood.
This is a fight between him and Bernie.
I remember getting an offer to host Def Comedy Jam
after Martin left.
And I thought about it, I really did it. I really thought about it.
I saw some Def Comedy Jams... and saw how good Martin was...
Again, before me make a decision.
I like, "I didn't follow this person. This person is amazing."
Martin Lawrence is one of the most underrated hosts.
I hope they let him host Oscar or something or Emmy
or Grammy or something. He is a good host. </ P>
I just want to say happy 25th birthday to Def Comedy Jam,
And I respect Martin Lawrence,
the greatest host of all time.
Women and men ,
What happened? He is ready!
Okay, some of you are sad, people trapped out there better recognize. </ p >
You know what Def Comedy Jam is doing for us.
For a completely unhindered female comic to say whatever he says
without making love, okay?
Let's be honest. That's where you want people who are unobstructed to be:
like, "He is ready ! Uhh! "</ P>
You tried typing your monthly report in your head,
and I ironed my hair. </ P>
Creating a Worldstar video in the dugout
Kissing the entire office warming catfish in the microwave.
You know, FaceTiming my mama,
Talking about stupid assholes I work with. </ P>
Ha ha! </ P>
Pressing your child when bringing your child to work day. </ P>
Like, "Look at your child. He cute!
You will be fine when you grow up, boys.
Do you like adults? "
Sorry.
Or what about Casual Friday,
I appeared without underwear and without bras, like, "What's wrong, everything?
It's casual Friday. It's so cold here?
My nipples. "
You don't want to work with that nonsense. You don't want that in your work.
If you want that at Def Comedy Jam.
That's why I'm here to give a respectful shout from...
For real, though, I am here to say a respectful shout </ p >
to let a sister like me...
someone who used to sneak into the homes of my friends late at night...
Because they have cables < br /> I don't have that crap.
and I used to watch it and be like, "I want to do it someday."
So, thank you, guys, for giving me a chance
and letting me do it
Thank you, Def Comedy Jam. Peace.
What happened, everyone? This is JB Smoove.
A physical comedian especially a comic
who uses every inch of his body to laugh
Every inch is unlucky.
And as you see from my long frame and ramp,
I am the prototype perfect doing physical comedy. Come on.
Fucking bowling ball again.
Ahh.
Ohh!
Nigga... fshhhh!
Nigga...
Welcome to the stage, my man, DL Hughley!
That's great.
When Def Comedy is active in the 90s,
That was what was happening at that time:
Police brutality, riots
and strange elections with a mad billionaire running for president
Damn, that's all
You know very well that at that time a white woman blamed a black man
for kidnapping her children,
someone at Def Jam will talk about that.
Black men don't kidnap children.
Some of us won't even see They are little bastards, so...
The point is in the 90s:
Def as a comedian breaking news
for people people before they go to the club
So we make sure they are told
before they get to the club and get pregnant.
See this
Beaten and kicked brutally by Los Angeles police officers,
a beating that continues even as a human seems to offer no resistance.
Only people whites were shocked when they saw the tape.
The police rummaged in black people in the black community was not new nonsense.
When I see that, I think it's a new Timex ad.
I don't know what that is.
But it's okay, Because his brother is paid .
He gets a million dollars for every punch $ 56 million.
I'm looking to get fucked up.
I do 300 miles per hour at Volkswagen,
shout out the window, "Fuck the police!
Fuck the bastard carrying the badge!
Come here, give me my money!
The problem isn't is Lorena Bobbit doing it?
what her husband claimed.
The facts about the action are proven.
He cuts his penis from...
drove on the highway...
and threw it out the window.
Cars 111, we want you to continue on the freeway.
See if you can't find a penis.
He clearly has vision 20 / 20. He found the small object. </ P>
It's very hard to find. </ P>
The Los Angeles Police Department
is actively looking for Mr. Simpson. </ P>
Do you know who the real victim is? Ike.
Ike Turner.
Because Ike is a shaker king until OJ takes his title.
No one cares about OJ and all the punk-ass crap.
Niggas just wants to know: When will the next riot?
Fuck that
We, the jury, find the defendant, Orenthal James Simpson,
not guilty of murder crimes
I want Johnnie Cochran in my corner.
He's like a magician.
He said, "If it's not appropriate, you must...
Free.
"... free. "
I actually heard white people say that they were very upset
and angry with the decision that they could not sleep
Well, you know, black people have been suffering from insomnia for 400 years.
Every prison is full of niggas, just overcrowded with niggas. </ p >
A bastard goes: "Hey!
We have to look around in the justice system!
This doesn't work! "
Women and men, put your hands
for Mr. Bill Bellamy!
What's up, everything How do you feel?
Def Comedy Jam is in front of his time.
We make jokes every Friday night it's very hot,
You tell them in church on Sunday, and they are repeated all week.
We don't tweeting, not retweeting. We just repeated.
We didn't film comics during the show. We watched the show again that day.
We didn't send people across the room.
You get your ass and go there and talk to someone
Kita bicara omong kosong, kamu merasakan aku
If you ask someone, "Are you on the vine?"
Your answer is, "No, bro, I'm stuck in traffic like a bastard,
p>
Still at Sunset. "
" Emojis "are just lazy people, country to say" Emma Jean. "
But at that time, his thoughts /> a thousand niggas follow you
will scare everyone in this room
But at the same time,
social media will be the thing best ever happened to Def Jam.
Think about it. We will have all kinds of hashtags.
Think about it. They must be it's been so popping up all over the place.
I probably already have it the most famous hashtag in the world.
Do you know what I'm saying?
If anyone here needs time at home to call a girl at two in the morning,
what do you make
p>
- Bored calls - Yes, you do
Now, we will see some more iconic moments
that were created at Def Comedy Jam,
and they must have gone bankrupt Internet. Take a look.
Now, you are ready...
for the next comedian?
Yes. Is she funny
- What's wrong? - How are you & apos ?;
Be careful out there, now! </ P>
If you know what I know, all the women at home say, "Hello!" </ P>
Hello! </ P >
Meatballs!
She's such a damn woman!
Pissed off, man!
She's very crazy.
Shuckey Duckey, shaman, shaman.
Along with Martin Lawrence,
there is one other person you know with Def Comedy Jam,
and that name is Adele Givens.
He made more appearances at Def Comedy Jam
than other comedians.
So, let's give him Intro Def Comedy Jam.
Kid Capri, if you want.
Women and men, welcome to the stage
queen of Def Comedy Jam, Miss Adele Givens !
What's wrong?
Cursing!
Def jam jam comedy 25! It's amazing
And I know, when you see me, I know exactly what you think.
I know what you think.
"She's a very unlucky woman."
I'm very happy and honored to be a part of this.
And this is what makes me feel very good, that we look really good.
So many of my colleagues from 25 years ago, we look really good.
And we are old now.
So, I know how we feel.
We are sleepy, aren't we, bastards?
Something about the old school, when you enter the zone double E.
When I say "double-E,"
I mean the crap that happens with the double-E in it.
As sometimes you're walking on the road,
take care of your business, think you're cute,
dan entah dari mana, lututmu berkata, "Hei, sundal, aku akan membungkuk.
I'll kneel here, bitch. "
That's the double-E zone.
Because you always get double-E problems with your body
If it's not your knee, > that's your teeth, right?
How do your teeth get new ones in their 40s?
And why do dentists think they are mechanics?
You know how you brought your car for one thing,
then they tell you some other crap happens?
That's how the dentist does it. I go there, I get a toothache. </ P>
Damn this isn't even real. This is half the teeth in my head. </ P>
I go in there, I say it's a bitch, "My teeth hurt."
He said, "I have to get X-rays."
Tooth here. This slut gets X-rays here.
I say, "Hey, bitch, Why are you on this side?"
He said, "I think I saw a cavity."
I said, "All right, close your damn eyes, bitch,
Because it's not your fucking business there. "
And what about the dentist, they want to be a hero to your teeth?
You go in there and your teeth kick your ass
It's like, "Hey, this bastard killed me. Take it out."
The bitch said, "I can save my teeth."
"From who, bitch? I am a victim in this situation."
Pull your teeth, save the bitch. That's my motto. I live with it.
I live that double life. But what do I say:
If it's not your teeth and if it's not your knee,
another double-E we experience... You laugh too hard and you pee.
Sometimes...
Don't be a little bitch. Some of you are now wet. </ P>
Don't get a lot. </ P>
Just make you smell like R. Kelly's boyfriend.
Just a few samples.
But I say what.
There is one double-E we search, right?
If you're old, that's double-E which you normally run,
You usually hide from,
But now if you see that bitch, you know you like it, don't you?
You know double-E.
Sleep.
Oh, some of you want a bastard take a nap now
You've been taking a long nap, you have to get up and get ready to sleep?
It ever happened to you?
You like, "Oh, damn it !
It's almost my sleep!
Why don't you wake me up?
You know I don't like too late to sleep. "</ p >
But I have to say this.
Some nights are made and beautiful
of these three masters here
I want to say, From the bottom of my heart,
thank you, Because you might be able to do it
so that the world can see what kind of fucking woman is that?
Thank you
I personally like comedy. Why? Because I am a comedy student.
You cannot be a comedy student < br /> and not become a student of Def Comedy Jam.
I remember the first time I had a chance to do Def Jam.
Should I curse? Should I not curse?
What should I talking about? Should I make things?
Do I have a high voice on the stage, or do I not have a high voice?
What should I sound like?
What am I doing? Should I go there? and be like, "Motherfuckers!"
Or should I be like , "Yeah, niggas!" </ P>
What am I saying? I don't know
But I'm like, "I'm not talking like one of them .
So why can't I just go out? and be myself and say, "What happened?"
I remember I had Lime green linen shirt lit,
some blue jeans and Air Force 1 & apos; s.
This lime green shirt will kill them.
This will appear soon.
They will see this shirt and leave, "Ooh, who is that?"
And I remember sitting on a bench for most of my shows
because I want to show How comfortable I am
where so many people get nervous
Because of the bad thing about Def Jam:
If you don't bring it, they will get rid of your ass from that stage.
So, I turn my mind -cheat them.
I won't stand up and look like a little person who is afraid
and is everywhere.
I'll sit briefly and hit you with arrogant and cold crap
and make you go, "Ooh."
And then I'll wake up and hit you <
And that's what I did.
One of the best sets I have ever had is at Def Comedy Jam. </ p >
I can now say, like Kevin Hart, the comedian,
I did at Def Comedy Jam.
Come to the stage now,
king impression, my man, Steve Harvey!
Heh.
I never made an impression, Kid.
I never act like anything.
You said...
I never made an impression, dawg.
Dirt. But after they see me around all this cursing,
I will act like my ass gets a game show after this.
I know they will take me out of TV, so I might go too hard.
Damn it Yes.
Let me tell you something.
There is one impression that appears at any time in Def Jam. </ p >
That is one of the most repeated impressions that have ever been
in the history of Def Jam,
and that comes from the legend itself,
King of Pop, the only Michael Jackson.
- Michael Jackson - Michael Jackson! What is
King of pop
Ohh!
Imagine if Michael Jackson came from the project
What if Michael Jackson pimped?
He and Tito would ride in Cadillacs and dirt.
"Slow, Tito.
Slow, Tito! Cursed!
Is that ho I'm sitting there on the side of the road?
Let me out.
Come here, kid!
I said come here, kid!
Where is my money How much did you get?
"Mike I'm sorry. All I get is $ 100. "
" Girl, you've been here all day, and all you get is a $ 100 bill?
p>
Ohh!
Save it in the closet. "
I thought Michael was cracked.
I'm sure you're Michael at home like...
Ohh!
Women and men, welcome to the Def Jam stage,
Mr. Eddie Griffin!
Motherfucker looks like he needs some sandwiches.
Russell, I want to thank you, Stan Lathan and the rest of the Def Jam team.
You see all the niggas here that are used to be brokers rather than bastards?
You give us a platform,
Because they won't put us on The Tonight Show right away.
We didn't get anything from their motherfucking talk shows.
But it's the first two years is magic bullshit
because we are all bastards doing this for about five years,
and no one will put us in.
So, when the first harvest comes out, < br /> nigga, we are ready
Aku tidak akan membicarakan beberapa dari mereka bajingan yang datang setelah nigga.
You have to get some quality control.
You don't see it here Because luck doesn't work.
And thankfully comedy knows how to to get rid of dirt it's from there
Therefore the Def Jam viewer will let your ass know:
"Nigga, McDonald & apos; s are shouting.
I think you it is necessary to flip the burger. Damn this is not for you. "
Since I did Def Jam, that crap changes my life
Martin came to me on The Comedy Store
and said, "Nigga, you need to do Def Jam."
I like, "I'll take my HBO soon." </ p >
He said, "Nobody knows who you are.
Is it five minutes here, the bastard will know you."
I said, "Damn, nigga.
Heh! Why don't I think of that nonsense? "
Right? So, thank you, Martin. I appreciate that, Brother.
And then, after I do the show... bullshit aired...
every time I did a show for today motherfucking,
they remained at: "Eddie, is Michael Jackson ! "
I'll do Michael Jackson one more time dear.
Okay, nigga, here it is. Dirt.
Too fast? Too fast? </ P>
Getting? Nigga is dead! </ P>
Fuck you bastards. </ P> >
Good night.
I have to put this here.
I like it when they give me something hard and black to do.
Oh!
I forgot where I am!
If you look good and you get it happening,
there's nothing wrong by letting you know
that you got it happening. Good?
That's why when a man walks up to me, Talk about, "Baby...
what's your name? "
Dear, I just told him," Rent. "
This brother came to me, talked about," Mmm. </ p >
I can do something for your body nothing has ever been done. "
I said," What is it like? "
" I can make you come with my finger. "
I said," Okay, shit... I can do that! "
If he gets a penis like a hamster, he'd better have a tongue like rattlesnake
Am I right?
I like them niggas where I can pump them and catch their buttocks. Pow!
Holler at yes, nigga!
Ha ha ha!
I'll tear his ass! Pow! Pow!
You don't even know what it is Pap smear. </ P>
I told my person, "I will get a Pap smear." </ P>
He was like, "Yes, bring me, no mustard. "
You want to know:" Sheryl, Have you ever slept with a white person? "
Yes I did. Once in my life
But that's because the rent is due.
And that bastard is the landlord.
But now I have that building!
Oh, Anda ingin benar-benar jahat, ya? Anda ingin beberapa ini?
Foot-fucking there. That's a nice foot-fucking.
Be careful, because I'm going to dunk on your mother's donkey
So give big beard love!
Women and men, welcome to the stage
Tiffany Haddish, Melanie Comarcho,
Sheryl Underwood and Adele Givens, huh !
Ha!
I looked at these women. They paved the way for people like me.
We all did Def Comedy Jam. But you guys do Def Comedy Jam! </ P>
- Yo, yo! - Good? </ P>
Now, Sheryl, I want to file question, okay?
Do you think it's more difficult for women to enter Def Comedy Jam, to do it?
Not harder than men, because if you /> can't pass Peppermint,
- You don't get Def Comedy Jam. - Woot woot!
If you don't succeed through Peppermint Lounge...
I see a lot bastards think they are really funny
and their faces are cracked at Peppermint.
You better ask someone.
What That's peppermint.
- Peppermint Lounge is on... - New Jersey. No kidding.
They'll bore you from the clothes, from the intro
They will bore you... You start your little jokey joke,
You think so will kill the game
They are worse than that Showtime in Apollo. </ P>
Much worse. Terrible. </ P>
And Bill Bellamy is a damn host, with her beautiful ass,
so we thought we had shot.
Of course.
Melanie, I want to ask you, How does Def Comedy Jam change your life?
Oh, this is amazing. Bob Sumner taking me around
immediately followed my first recording.
I toured with Def Jam for like, seven years,
and after that, Everyone starts grabbing me.
I did Martin Lawrence for eight years, I toured with Martin Lawrence.
Thank you, Martin, for love
Chris Tucker, Katt Williams, everyone brought me
I became the most comic toured in America. So that's what Def Jam did for me.
He has half of Hawthorne, you. He has half of Hawthorne.
If you talk about how changes your life,
Def Comedy Jam pays for my colleague, my bachelor, my master's degree
And my abortion
Ha ha! I'm just kidding.
That's a joke, this is a joke. Fine.
And I have three doctorates.
- Wow! - Right. / p>
- Oh yeah. - You should ask someone
And I have a GED.
I also annoy.
- They pay for that too right? - Right
Well, Adele, I want to ask,
where did you get this saying, that you are a woman damn it?
How did that happen?
I will tell you exactly how it happened.
Because there are double standards in the world, like we know.
- Men can do things women can't do. - Right
I'll go out doing my stand-up,
and then, when I go down, people... Even women come to me
and say, "You know, as a woman, you can't get away with this. "
And the expression is born.
I'm like," How are you doing? I'm not can say & apos; suck dick &
but I can suck dick? How can it work? "
GED I challenge that logic.
That part
If I can suck dick, I will say something. </ P>
But I will tell you this What you see at this stage </ p >
and what you see in this audience,
What do you see with Laura Hayes and Sommore and all the women who come through...
- Robin Montague - Very much. The names are long.
What you can see is, If you put God first,
and you let God command your steps, you can do it. You can do it.
If you let God command it, you don't do it must pay shipping and handling.
And you don't need to sleep with anyone to go forward.
That's right.
- And so it is. < br /> - I refuse!
- Fucking woman from Def Comedy Jam! - You heard that
Stay awake
Yo, what's wrong This is a comfortable Ice Cube.
I want to wish you a happy 25th birthday for Def Comedy Jam.
I get a lot of credit to find people
with my Friday movie,
but I will never see Chris Tucker without Def Comedy Jam
or Bernie Mac.
Some of these people that I am credited to find,
I found them at Def Comedy Jam.
This has just become a great institution for comedy
TV stars, singing stars , movie star... he's from 312...
who's at home in Brooklyn Nine-Nine!
Come to the stage, my dude, Craig Robinson, you two! </ P>
Everyone says, "That's what we do." </ P>
That's what we do! </ P>
During running Def Comedy Jam,
literally hundreds of comedians done thousands of hours
of the original comedy routine.
So, when it comes to an extraordinary task wading through all that material
and choose the clip You see here tonight,
they have to come with an efficient system.
I see... </ p >
some smart people develop this application.
Word Search Def application.
This can search for any word or phrase
and immediately find every event on the show.
Examples... Let's try something simple.
Def Word, look for "yachting." "Yachting." </ P>
Looking for "yachting." </ P>
I really won the contest to be on Def Comedy Jam...
Occurrences are located
Alright, let's hear
Yachting!
Alright. I'm surprised there is one. Good .
Eh, let me see something, um...
That's a bit random. Let's see something else.
Def Word, look for "baby momma."
Search for "baby momma".
>
You know, the dominant / obedient relationship is interesting...
Occurrences are located
They find it.
- momma baby - baby momma
- baby momma
I think there will be more.
One more time and this time, what, we might also go for that, right?
Def Word, look for "muthafucka."
Search for "muthafucka."
You once had a cousin you were interested in,
but unlike in...
Occurrences located
- Yo, muthafucka! - Muthafucka
- Muthafucka - Muthafucka
- Muthafuckin money - Muthafuckin car. & apos;
- Home of Muthafuckin. ;. - Hand of Muthafuckin, man!
- Muthafuckin & Apos; East Coast, son! - Please, muthafucka!
"H" to muthafuckin & apos ; "A". </ P>
Well, say something, muthafucka! </ P>
- Muthafucka - Muthafucka
You retreat, park the trailer, inbred muthafuckas!
Nigga, your nut is better than muthafucka.
- This is muthafucka - You are muthafucka-eyed.
Muthafucka, <br </ P>
Oh, shit, muthafucka. </ P>
You make me hornier than muthafucka, nigga. </ P>
Muthafucka , where did you go? I went to make love with your mother
I'm not your mother either, muthafucka
Aku juga bukan ibumu sejati, muthafucka
Fuck, it's lots of muthafuckin events & apos;
Wow.
I'm glad I didn't say "nig..." Forget. < br /> Anyway...
You understand what that means. Def Comedy Jam Not for nausea.
We don't hold back. We bring it to raw.
We speak from the heart and from the groin,
Because that's what we do.
Women go to the restaurant and lose mind, man.
They must order From the expensive menu side,
side with steak and lobster and Dom Pérignon.
People want to give them that little warning too p> You understand that
This is steak, lobster and dick. This is a combination. "
Kamu mengerti itu
Ini steak, lobster dan kontol. Ini kombinasi. "
If nigga really wants to rape me, what can I do? Honest.
If you pass my fight, that's all. I have to take one for the team.
That's all I have. If you pass my fight...
"Hey, go, nigga. Hey, nigga!
Aah! "
Women, you have to start taking some responsibilities
for your own sad life.
If you are over 25 years old
and still walking around here, Speaking of, "Niggas are not bad,"
Prostitutes, you need to grow fuck up < br /> with your irresponsible kelness
What you want to say is all the niggas you make love are not unlucky.
Right. You need to find out what about your vagina
who keeps pulling niggas without being naughty.
Maybe ain & apos; t-shit pussy.
Let's go to the stage, my man, Cedric the Entertainer!
Yes!
What a night. Do you have fun tonight?
Good. No doubt, man.
Do you know what? During this period of racism and isolation,
Russell Simmons took a bold position.
He looked around and said TV need diversity,
So he reached out to see
if there were quality white comics it was out there
And of course, there were some protests
All black comics are like, "Hold only black comics, Russell.
You're too fast, bro. Slow down, you know? "
He said, "One day, this nation will rise up
and live the true meaning of its beliefs,
that we hold this truth To be clear,
that all comics are created equal, as long as they speak English. "
Do you know what I mean?
Women and men, we found all the white comics
ever at Def Jam.
Everyone, all of you. They went there. There. </ P>
Honest John, Rich Vos. They are there. </ P>
Niggas all their love! </ P>
Shouts out, man. Big up, man. </ P>
They left, the white comic from Def Jam. </ P>
Come this fall
They are the only bastards < br /> to get the show
Gosh, I'm out of here.
♪ Def Comedy Hours ♪
Women and men, two players / hosts Def Comedy Jam,
Mike Epps and Joe Torry!
What. What. What. What. </ P>
- What! - Hey, hey, hey, hey. </ P>
- Hey, hey, hey, hey! - Hey, hey, hey! </ P>
Do you know how to do that nonsense? </ P>
Yes, man, Those are some of the little kids there. </ P>
You know, this audience is here, this is not...
- this is not an actual Def Jam audience. - No.
We came in, they have a real Def Jam viewer. </ P>
Motherfuckers out there got up and... What are they do?
Fall all on the motherfucking floor. Yes.
Walk across the room, slap each other.
Make a drink under their lap.
Niggas is smuggling Courvoisier in everything and everything
- You know what I'm saying? - Yeah.
They have a lot of security. < Double security
Muslims are there, Big dudes are there, gorilla power.
They dress in chaos. I don't know why you are talking here.
You have a cowboy hat, at Def Comedy Jam
with some baby powder on his chest.
This Nigga looks like this.
Motherfucker, didn't you start with some cornrowed wrinkles, motherfucker?
Then you just came out...
Now Your beard covers your mouth Because it's not like it used to be.
You can't play that crap anymore.
You know, But we won't fuck each other .
We have enough bastards here we can make love to
- That is what we are about. - We make love to everyone
There some people out there are wearing shit shit.
If you don't have a joke, you can find some bullshit.
Like this bastard.
- Oh my God! - This is a big bastard here.
He played the spoon back that day, Fuck.
- You're too old for braces. - Yes, right.
And this nigga has a top profile here.
That's the top image. Because I have pants to motherfucker
This Nigga tries to sneak in. with top pajama on. </ P>
He goes up a few Skechers
and target shirt.
And there are many women here using bodysuits,
- and they don't have a body. - They don't have a body!
You look like a wrestler in this bastard
Hey. </ p >
I...
They walked in this bastard like this.
I saw one of them put a jump on the bastard that.
- Russell, we just want to say thank you. - Thank you.
Look at how many millionaires you made in this room tonight
Yes, you did
And if it wasn't for you, Russell, Many of us would be in prison.
- You were right . - Including you.
Def Jam 25!
Forest Whitaker is at home.
Rosie Perez is at home. What's wrong , Rosie? </ P>
The Wu-Tang Clan, they are in the house. </ P>
LL Cool J.
Tisha Campbell.
Malcolm-Jamal Warner.
Lawrence Taylor!
And es-t, yes!
Hey ! Big Daddy Kane.
♪ Smooth operator ♪
Kid & n; n Play, what's wrong? Thank you for coming out
Find my men here, Flavor Flav. Look at him. </ P>
Nobody like Flavor Flav. Look. </ P>
Alright, nigga, sit your ass . This is my show.
Flav is very bad, cockroaches are like this: "Father!"
Wesley Snipes.
Chocolate bastards bad, right?
Women can't leave your butt now, right? I bet that day, they are your dog.
"You are not bad, take your ass off here.
You little black bastard Go from here. "
We got Salt-N-Pepa, and Spinderella.
Spike Lee, what's wrong, man?
Spike put me in my first movie: Do the right thing. </ P>
Motherfucker wasn't employed by me. </ P>
No, but you know I don't want no more Spike Lee movies. </ P>
"Spike, why am I not in your movie?" "Fuck." </ P>
You are my brother I love you. Come here. </ P>
What happened? I know Big Bird has gone out of business,
but what happened? </ P>
Women and men, please say
for the king to rule the controversy, My dude, Katt Williams, you guys!
Good night. Good night. Uh...
By law, you know I am not allowed to make it to all events, but...
It's certainly fun for me to be able to make this.
Def Jam represents us, so I have to represent them.
I am very happy with that.
Uh...
plus, if you watch the news, you know about things that are happening.
You know that, uh, Trump is there, and I try to find out.
I realize it's some freaky white-boy shit.
You know , um...
getting crazy, the more it turns out they are.
You know that nonsense where they tie a belt around their neck
and almost choke themselves they are dumb to death so they can come?
That's Trump in the White House for us.
Erotic asphyxia. p>
We will only continue to fucking up until we return to North Korea,
and that will be the end of it.
Now, I know that many things you feel I try to avoid controversy.
That's not true. Controversy waits in the bush for me. </ P>
But Satan and all the shady bastards are my enemies
I don't run away from the fight, I'm not afraid of consequences.
Because if you fear the consequences, then it gives birth to fear,
and fear means you will stop. And we can no longer stop.
And Def Comedy Jam is fearless, like all of us should be.
God bless you.
Since that time it hit airwaves,
Def Comedy Jam is mired in controversy.
Many people who are part of from the generation of Civil Rights
cannot stand Def's Comedy Jam.
They feel like this attracts black people again.
We try to advance, advance the agenda of our civil rights,
national agenda us,
and have niggas in front of the camera go, "bastards"
and act like they are damn people all the time
Not part of their agenda. </ P>
I know I have to do it some saying "fuck you & apos; s"
to make some y & apos; all feel at home. </ P >
So... fuck you
Fuck you
And you make love to me.
Words this curse... we say them all the time
They just add our expressions.
I know how to make love. Because what do you know? My legs are open so much,
My IUD takes the cable channel, Fuck it.
The Def Comedy Jam There are a lot of female comedians in it.
Perception is so much criticism /> is that it is sexist and misogynist.
Every woman here, claps if you will suck a man's dick for $ 4 million.
Now, you know what? All of you have to clap,
because I know some of you two Maybe sucking dick for Happy Meal.
The comedian is honest > In the way they express their art,
and people feel uncomfortable,
But the truth is expressing, and also our own. </ P>
The thing that makes me very proud of of Def Comedy Jam
is that this platform gets these people to go onstage in front of the world
and tell the truth and clap for that.
If you understand it, it will ring a bell for you.
And if you don't hate hatred for these people,
you learn some sympathy or some mercy
or just laugh with them.
Here's DL Hughley and Dave Chappelle! </ P>
Now, a comedian has two jobs:
First and foremost, and most importantly, they have to produce a lot money
They have to do that. And then they become funny.
All right, that's yours... That's your priority.
But we are not here to offend our audience,
but we are not here to protect their feelings too.
Sometimes, when you express minority thoughts,
you risk being rejected by the majority,
But that refusal shouldn't be your reason stop
This must be an inspiration for you to continue,
unless your nonsense isn't funny,
in this case you might have to > just close. That's...
I hope you say that before my third season
Now, freedom of speech means what you say what you want,
and you are willing to handle with the consequences.
You can say whatever you want for your mother,
as long as you are willing to get That taste slaps your mouth.
Ha ha!
And what Def Comedy Jam is always willing to do
is to take heat, criticism and hatred,
That's it.
Wait, Stan, let me do that again.
That's just a strange line: "It's just basically black in America." </ P>
If we tell them What is black in America is,
is it they will believe us?
Oh, this is not for television. This is only for us in the room.
I will ask more briefly.
If we tell them what it is, will they believe us?
- No! - They don't want to!
Fuck no, they don't want to.
Nigga, there's damn white supremacy starter kit at Target.
"Yeah, let me take some tiki torches, some pants khaki and messy haircuts.
Something will happen next week. "
This is true now.
And have we seen everything before?
Yes!
So I will read the last sentence again . And, Kid Capri, maybe...
Maybe the song is a little less happy.
I'm playing games, Stan. I'm just busting your ball.
You can also leave this.
It's a reunion. I'm drinking backstage.
Alright, let me get My teleprompter...
Do you know why I wear glasses all night long?
Because my eyes are fixed as I read. But here it is. </ p >
- We have to record this garbage here. - No, I'm serious.
When I go to high school... Not in high school, in elementary school ,
they will make us all read aloud in circles
Whenever my turn, other children will be like...
Because of this... So I'm nervous all night.
I'm not afraid of people.
What do I do, what should I do? Read on? !
I read good luck by myself.
If I can stay completely from the audience, please
Hey, let me lead you in
All these damn letters just come to me, nigga
They just come to me like...
- All right. - Continue . I got it now.
I got it I can say many things that I can't spell.
Alright.
I seem to be jumping in. Please, DL
Alright, freedom of speech means you can say what you want
as long as you are willing to handle with the consequences.
You can talk to your mother Whatever you want...
Look? You made me mess now
This bullshit spread like Ebola.
This is fucking...
Look at white people. "We know that."
- "You put two darkness together!" - " Give me that damn script! "</ P>
But we still talk better than Russell. That's all I know. </ P>
We still do it. I just...
Freedom of speech means you can say what you want
as long as you are willing to handle with the consequences.
- Konsekuensi?! - Iya nih.
This bastard is here
And as a result.
Alright, let's go back.
- My fault. - No, keep doing that
p>
This is the best bullshit I've ever done all night. I'm happy as a fuck. This is good
What's wrong, Flex?
Wait, let me give a shout for Earthquakes,
who is one of my favorite comics in the fucking world I love you.
Earthquakes? Oh! What's wrong, Earthquake? </ P>
The champion is here. What's wrong? </ P>
Earthquake, please read. Don't like that. Don't sit there.
Freedom of speech means...
Wait!
Hello, Bruce Bruce.
Oh yeah.
- And Alex Thomas, hello to you too. - Alex Thomas in bastards
The New Yorkers are in this bastard.
And you are the most aware brother of here.
I say, you make me proud. You do
- Hey, Jesse - Jesse, yeah
Come here and say something
That will make white people feel bad < br>> for 20 minutes.
Yo!
Yes?
Jesse, you forged them on BET.
- Their body . - We wake up now.
If only white people watch BET, nigga, they will have earful.
I know they did, Debra. < br /> I know they did it.
Oh. Ohh.
Alright, let's hurry up. The bar closes immediately.
No, we're fine, man. There are lots of recordings. </ P>
All right. </ P>
Baiklah, ini dia. Nyata.
I hate reading, I always have.
I hate Rock School. I hate it all.
- I used to love Rock School. - I have never. </ P>
Actually, the only reason I understand what happened in the news
is because of the Schoolhouse Rock. </ P>
♪ I just bills ♪
♪ Yes, I just bill ♪
♪ And I'm sitting here on Capitol Hill ♪
That's it! That's it I know!
We really know it's better than the black national anthem.
Isn't that chaotic?
♪ Lift up each sound ♪
♪ And singing ♪
♪ Up to the earth and the ring of heaven ♪
♪ The ring with harmony ♪
This is the part where everyone hums.
♪ Freedom ♪
♪ Let our joy rise high ♪
- ♪ As the sky listens ♪ < br /> - I don't know this
I'm not that singer. I know every word.
- Joe. - Joe, don't be like that
Joe, can't you sing something? isn't it about the vagina for once?!
Ohh!
♪ I don't want to be a player... ♪ I'm in cahoots with you
All right, all right. </ P>
"Everything that your man won't do." </ P>
I say all this for said
I tried hard not to read in public.
Here it is, DL
Hold it, hold it. Where is the manager production?
Calculate us
Give us three or two one.
- Get ready. - All right, stand up.
- And he really did it too. - They will make us right. </ P>
Five, three, one, seven, four. </ P>
I don't know you went to public school, too, bastard Oh my God! </ P>
That sounds normal to me. That's the mess. </ P>
That's all odd numbers. </ P>
Five, seven, one. </ P>
Five pips. p>
Just say "one," bastard.
One, bastard
Alright, now
Oh! Ohh!
p>
You should be at Def Jam. Dear God.
Freedom of speech means you can say what you want
Like, you can talk but you want, for your mom when you were a child
as long as you are willing to get The taste is slapped out of your mouth.
Right. My mother doesn't... she doesn't hit
Anyway...
What Def Comedy Jam is always willing to do
take heat, criticism and hatred.
Because basically, It's only called black in America.
First time I heard from Def Comedy Jam
was when my cousin brought me VHS tapes from a compilation.
I thought it was two or three episodes. And he said, "You need to watch this." </ P>
The only stand-up I've ever seen Until then Eddie Murphy. </ P>
And then Def Comedy Hours come into my life,
and I like, "This is the blackest, The craziest thing I've ever seen in my life,"
and it's amazing.
You can imagine live in a country where you don't have access to free speech
and grow in the world where everything is censored,
and suddenly, One day you are exposed to everything,
and you think that's everything,
and then Bernie Mac comes to the stage and like,
"I'm not afraid of you bastards Hah!" </ P>
And you're like, "Wait, what's happening here?" </ P>
It was fearless, and it was unlimited,
and that was an injection of that really changed how I was,
dan mungkin banyak komedian lainnya di Afrika Selatan, melihat komedi stand-up.
I'm not an American, I don't grow up as an American,
but I am aware that there is a common experience
that connects us all as human beings .
I think one of the things Def Comedy Jam opens me
Not curse words,
But how creativity is the curse words < br /> used, you know
I always know the word "damn". I never knew the word "sheee-it."
This is different. This is not the same thing. </ P>
There is a developing language in Def Comedy Jam
that creates a new expression form sometimes. </ P>
Like, "bitch" can mean five different things.
I don't know if I ever knew "bastard" before Def Comedy Jam.
And that's even "mom..." That is "mu & apos; fucka."
Nothing "th." It's just "mu & apos; fucka."
"Here you are & apos; fucka here. Sheee-that."
Def Comedy The clock will not be complete
without saluting them who goes too fast
Parents, if your four-year-old child can't talk,
but can do Tootsee Roll...
Your donkey is a ghetto.
Remember that nonsense, the method of don & apos; t-cry?
Your mother strangled you, you will be like this...
"Ohh Heh heh Heh Ha.
Ohh! Heh. Mmm. </ P>
Ahh! Ha ha. Ooh. </ P>
♪ Every step I take ♪
♪ Every day Every time I pray ♪
♪ I will miss you ♪
I want a girl... When she sucks my dick,
I want him to see like an ugly bastard
play dice
♪ Think about the day ♪
♪ As you go ♪
>
♪ How much life must be taken What a bond that must be broken ♪
♪ I will miss you ♪
I think there should be a law against two damn ugly person.
You will bring another ugly bastard in the world.
"Hahahaha!
Oh, you know I'll be < Br> Give it to you, kid.
And they have the right to work.
You become like, "Damn, continue with your ugly yourself."
But to be honest, I don't have sex anymore.
I'm afraid of AIDS. I take an AIDS test.
♪ Every day Every time I pray ♪
♪ I'll miss you ♪
If you think Def Comedy Jam, you think Martin,
- You think Adele, - Yes.
- and you think Bernie Mac. - Yes, bro.
Yes, indeed.
Bernie motherfuckin; Mac.
Come on.
Hold on for one minute mom.
To get milk and cake.
A legend there, man.
Bernie is so confident.
This bastard wears his face in his pants
so everyone knows who he is.
Oh, all the suits. He has his coat. That is a lot of colors.
He has colors they don't even have in the crayon box
He's great. He always has Great little words that we always...
Bernie will walk over to you and leave, "You know me walk alone.
We are all together, but I walk alone.
I am on the 50 yard line, but that is the first and the goal.
It takes two for tango, but four for Cabbage Patches. "</ P>
You will like," What, nigga? That makes no sense at all, Bernie. "</ P >
Bernie... let me tell you, before the show every night,
We smoke cigars.
And we usually exchange them.
Bernie will bring his favorite, we will replace cigars. </ P>
But you are okay to smoke in the arena. </ P>
Because we sell out /> basketball arena
So, we will only pay fines, Because we will smoke cigars.
So, we will send the money forward.
Only: "Damn, here. Five thousand, whatever you want. "
Because we smoke.
So, one day, we are in the locker room,
Because we're playing somewhere, big theater
- That is Houston. - Houston?
And the fire marshal enters and says, < br /> "Hey, excuse me, excuse me.
You have to get the cigar out. There are no cigarettes here."
I said, "Okay, hey , we did... we paid a fine.
"What do you mean, you paid the fine?"
I said, "We just... we sent it. "
So, he said," Listen to me.
Only one of you came here. I want to talk to you. "
And he chose Bernie.
This white man was there,
and Bernie is talking to him for two consecutive minutes.
You can see the dude's head will explode,
Because he doesn't know anything Bernie said. </ P>
Because Bernie had just done Bernie. </ P>
And the white dude, when he made it past, he just say,
"You just go ahead and your cigar smoke you will be fine."
We are on tour for three years, Do not understand a word he said,
so I know...
- But Bernie, for us, man... - Yes, man.
- Bernie is our king. - Surely.
Bernie Mac is our favorite.
Bernie Mac means something to us.
He is one of us that we all sit on around the monitor to watch.
Because, you know, /> Bernie closes the event. </ P>
And we will watch each other,
But when Bernie gets on stage, is different. </ P>
We go go there to see it.
We are all stand-up, but we fall in love with Mac,
because Mac doesn't just want to make you laugh
He tried to throw you at something
and then make you laugh bad luck You know you don't laugh at business.
Preacher, paralyzed person... /> Bernie just started. </ P>
And he's evil on that stage, man. </ P>
He is the biggest king here. </ P>
- This is the end, Bernie Great Mac. - Bernie Mac, what Check him
I'm not afraid of you bastards.
I'll tell you something right from the motherfucking press.
I don't come from ignorance.
And, New York, damn god, you two look good
You like bacon and egg sandwiches. You look good
Because I love sex. < br /> I like it.
Can not do anything else.
And I am blessed.
I am big. I am very structured . I'm hanging low.
If I pull my dirt out, This whole room will be dark.
Look!
You don't understand
I'm not afraid of you bastards. </ P>
Representing Chi-Town Like my man Bernie,
tolong selamat datang ke panggung Deon Cole!
What's wrong? How do you do it? Everyone is fine?
Give applause.
Chicago in the building. < br /> Where are you Chicago, make some noise.
I just want to personally give a shout for my man Bernie Mac,
Adele Givens, Sheryl Underwood,
George Willborn, Kenny Howell. </ P>
These are some great Chicago comedians. Without them, I wouldn't be here either. </ P>
So, give it to them. I appreciate that.
So, we will just ignore the four killed.
And the black ones.
to Martin Lawrence in his drawer,
Def Comedy Jam gives you An unforgettable moment.
And 25 years later, they are classic.
There is a lot of black pressure, isn't it? This is a difficult job.
You can't feel relieved at all.
Now, who Do they check with this?
They say yachting is America's number one sport.
You never see none of us yachting , Are you?
Unh-unh. After that the first big boat ride, We lost our taste for sailing a little.
This is messed up, man. It's not funny. You can't even become a thief anymore.
Everyone is a thief.
One day, I robbed a shop , come back out,
I was in a bar, taking care of my business, cooling down, just being cold, like me.
this is actually a bad thing he wants to do it
He said, "Mac." I said, "Yes, that's my name."
He said, "Can I ask a question?" I said, " Yes. "</ P>
He said," Does it taste pussy? like pumpkin cake? "</ P>
It makes me crazy. I said, " Don't ask me without questions like that. </ P>
I have never had pumpkin pie. "</ P>
Kick it! </ P>
You've traveled outside ordering Chinese food,
p>
how long do they have to say it in Chinese the same thing you just said?
You like, "Let me get a small order shrimp fried rice
That's it. "
" Small order of fried shrimp? "
" Yeah, dawg, that's it. "
" I ordered for you. "
"No, partner, I don't have time."
So, we jump into the car, and we roll over.
I got a thousand pounds up with me, > Fuck. </ P>
We slapped five seats and bad luck. </ P>
Go to my sister's house, and this nigga will just swing. </ P>
I go, "Oh no, bastard. Not today, that damn god. Fuck that."
I used to have the most work myself. dangerous in Washington, DC Dude! </ P>
How many Domino pizza boys? Have you seen a fucking gun? </ P>
Mereka akan merampok saya setiap hari, Bung.
Aku harus mengambil pistol, Bung!
Berapa banyak anak laki-laki pizza Domino? sudahkah kamu melihat membawa pistol sialan?
Dulu saya bust di apartemen orang, hanya: "Domino's membeku!
Put the money on the floor, man! Climb the floor Don't move
Alright, I'll leave here good and slow, okay? </ p >
I don't want any problems.
One of you bastards is my tip. "
There are types of bastards shouting about blow jobs,
and she wears four size clothes. Small old legs
So you know his penis is small.
I can't give him a punch job.
My big lips, his little dick. That won't work.
That will like trying to give a whale a Tic Tac, a bastard.
That nonsense won't work That won't work.
Real. Am I lying
Def Comedy Jam is nonsense.
That's black, it's funny, and it makes a lot of famous people.
And that makes a lot of rich people.
That makes a lot of household names, < br /> and you know what i'm talking about
Cedric the Entertainer, Kleenex.
That changes comedy forever. The door opens.
People talk about it,
so they look like fools years later. </ P>
Now, when you look at this room, You see how stupid it is to be a hater. </ P>
Right. </ P>
All the way of today's comedy is leading back to Def Comedy Jam. </ P>
when I saying I can't be more proud
has become part of something being groundbreaking
Every comedian touches the stage, whether they make final pieces or not,
is part of this great legacy.
So, Stan and Russell and Bob and Sandy,
we are very grateful
for what you allow.
So, for the last time, maestro, if you want
Thank you.
I want to thank all of you to come out
and celebrate this beautiful night with us.
So, now I have to submit it to the person who made everything possible: </ p >
Russell Simmons.
Thank you for coming out God bless you. Good night.
Happy 25th birthday, Def Jam.
Major shouted to my people Russell Simmons and Stan Lathan.
Twenty-five years! God. I sit here trying think, man.
You are old when you start.
Like, when it starts, you're old like shit.
And now... now we're talking 25 years after that.
So , I know you can't...
I know you can't hear me!
But I just want to say it, man!
What you start is some from dopest shit ever!
So, Russell and Stan!
Hey!
This... this is very big!
>
I love you
I love you old donkey!
The two coolest and oldest bastards in business, man.
You have pedestrians on me. All right?
I'll put "Def Jam" behind your chair
Wheelchair
I love you. Ha ha ha! </ P>