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COMIC COMBINATION
TEMPERAMENTAL TEENS
CGI ANIMATION FIGURE
KAMEO FREEAN PRODUCED BY: PEOPLE WHO HAVE BRAIN IN BOKONG
WRITTEN BY: REAL HEROES
DISTRIBUTED BY: PEOPLE WHO OFFER IT IS EXPENSIVE
Behind is rather quiet.
Help me.
Okay, but I have to drive.
Sorry.
Dopinder.
Pool. Dead.
Beautiful.
The fragrance is delicious, right?
Not the perfume of the car. That girl.
Yes. Gita. He is beautiful.
She should be able to become a pleasant wife.
But, my cousin Bandhu is more than I used to steal Gita's heart.
His actions are not as handsome as his face.
Dopinder, I think this might be the reason I was in your taxi today.
Yes, sir, you called my taxi, remember?
No, my skinny friend who has brown skin. Love is something beautiful.
When you find it, the whole world feels fragrant, carries out the perfume of your car.
So you have to hold your love...
tightly!
And never let you loose. Don't make mistakes like me.
- Understand? - Yes.
Or your entire world will be felt like Mama June finished yoga.
Sir, does it feel like Mama June?
Like two vagabonds who make love with full shoes pee. - Okay, enough.
I can continue to explain it, Dopinder. But the point is, it's bad!
That's bad.
Why are you wearing this red costume, Mr. Pool?
Because it's Christmas, Dopinder.
And I chased someone on my list.
I've waited for one year, three weeks...
six days and...
14 minutes to make it fix what he has done to me.
What has he done to you, Mr. Pool?
This...
Boo!
You won't be disappointed.
It's better.
And what about next month's ?
There is no delivery.
Not only you who want to win the war.
That's not true.
Look, our supply is being having a little problem...
We appreciate if you can be patient.
OK.
We fulfill everything the following month.
Nice to do business with you.
Fuck mutants!
Ah, damn it!
I forgot to bring my ammunition bag.
- So we come back? - No, there's no time.
Damn. I only have this.
9, 10, 11, 12 bullets, or dead.
Stop here!
Everything becomes $ 27.50.
I have never brought wallet to work time.
Make my costume form bad.
But, how about we just drop it?
Okay.
Merry Christmas.
And friendly greetings on Tuesday and April for you, Pool!
Oh! Oh, hello!
I know, okay?
Who did I take to play in my fim?
I can't tell you, but is rather like "Polverine."
And you know, he has a pair of testes that are shaved smooth.
Surely I have to go to a place to make my face go.
Bad guys to be killed.
Full power.
Blow the penis.
Corinthian leather is luxurious.
I am looking for Francis!
Do you see this person?
Yanky, yanky!
I never said this, but don't swallow it.
Damn.
I forgot to turn off the stove huh?
Now, the latest news.
A successive collision turns into shootings on the highway this morning.
Roadblocks prevent police from going to the scene.
Citizens are advised to stay at home.
Attackers seem to carry weapons, dangerous, and wear...
- Red costume. - Red costume.
Deadpool.
Negasonic! Come on, we have a mission.
Colossus, wait.
I've given Deadpool the chance to join us...
but he prefers like a child.
Small children with heavy weapons.
When can he grow up and see the benefits of being X-Man?
What advantages? Uniform costume?
A house that explodes every few years?
Come on.
The exploding house to build character.
Have you had breakfast?
Breakfast is the most important food in a day.
This, full of protein. Good for bones.
Deadpool will probably break your bones.
Get away!
Hey!
Wait!
You might ask, "Why is my costume red?"
That is so that the bad guys don't know I'm bleeding.
This person knows that too.
He uses brown pants.
Good! I only have 12 bullets...
so you have to share!
Let's count.
Damn.
Bastard!
10! Shit!
9! Fuck!
8.
Damn fucker!
Deadpool is ugly.
7. Deadpool is great.
So count your bullets. 6.
4.
Get you!
Right above my cock!
3, 2!
Stupid! No wonder.
Tonight is really steady.
Francis!
Francis...
What's up!
Where are you, Francis?
You are not Francis.
Really? Want to fight?
You might think, "My boyfriend says it's a superhero movie..."
"but the person in the red costume menyate the other person!"
I might be super powerful, but I'm not a hero.
And, yes, technically this is a murder.
But some love stories also start with murder.
And this is exactly what happened. A love story.
And to know the truth...
I will take you backwards before I wear this red costume.
(TWO YEARS AGO) Look, maybe it can help if I talk slowly? I didn't order pizza.
This is 7348 Red Ledge Drive? Are you Merchant?
Yes, but Mr. Merchant doesn't order this cake!
So who is calling?
me!
Pineapple and olives?
Sweet and salty.
Who are you? Why are you in my room...
Is that forfeited?
Gosh, I hope not.
Dude, listen, if it's a poker problem.
I told Howie, I told him...
Okay, take what you want.
Thank you.
Sir, before you do anything, can you give me a big tip?
Jeremy, right?
Wade. Wade Wilson.
There is no tip for you, Jer.
I'm not here for him.
I came here for you.
Okay, wow, apparently the bullet is not for me.
I'm not finished yet.
You must seriously pay attention to your clothing modifications.
It's jeans, not hanger bouquets.
And I take your wallet. You're good at giving it to me.
Okay, please, man, may I take my card back...
I'll shoot your cat!
I really don't understand what you mean. I don't have a cat.
Who is cat litter who's the one I just stepped on?
Never mind, tell me...
What kind of situation can't be recovered with pizza?
Do you know Meghan Orflosky?
I'm wrong to say? Orflosky?
Orlovsky? Yes? Nice.
Because he knows you.
Jeremy, I'm a member of a group of people who receive payments to beat people.
And this little Meghan, she doesn't have money, but she's lucky...
I have a soft side.
- But I... - A stalker.
The threat is painful, Jer.
Although not as painful as this dagger.
So stay away from Meghan.
Understand?
Yes, sir.
We are finished.
Wait. Is it finished?
Yes. Finished.
You should see your face.
I don't know what to do. I'm so scared.
Soft side, remember?
If you still bother him again...
and you will know how feels like my hard side.
That will hurt.
Or have I done it?
Meghan?
You won't hear Jeremy again. He is cured.
Impossible.
I should bring my roller skates. Show to these children how to use it.
And that's why we did it. But mostly because of money.
Hey, can you beat my stepfather?
I beat that person because he deserves to be beaten.
Hey, wait!
You are my hero.
No, no, no, no. I'm not like that!
No. Will never.
Your bastard, Wade.
I'm just a criminal who gets paid to beat a worse criminal.
Welcome to Sister Margaret's.
Here is like a field hall work for mercenaries.
People consider us like tooth fairy...
Because we broke teeth people to get money.
Hope we don't see your name on the gold card.
Buck! Liefeld...
Hey, Wade!
Wade Wilson, the pathetic protector. What can I do for you?
I want oral sex.
Oh God, me too.
Drink, use foam. But first...
Hey, I don't accept money to look after that child, okay?
Make sure you return it to Miss...
Orlovsky.
Yes, he.
Are you sure?
You know, as a bouncer, you are a kind hearted person.
I bet, you must release the child.
He is not an evil child, Weas.
He just likes to stalk.
I was even worse than him when I was his age.
I travel to exotic places...
Baghdad, Mogadishu, Jacksonville, meet with interesting new people. And then...
Kill them. Yes, I have already seen your Instagram.
So what do Unit Special Tasks do in Jacksonville?
That's a secret.
They have a great program every Friday. (Thank's God Its Friday)
Alright, Kahlua, Baileys and...
whipped cream.
I give you oral sex.
Why did you tell me to make it?
Kelly, Kelly, Kelly...
Bring this to Buck, please, and say this from Boothe. A little warming up.
Remind me what is the benefit of doing that?
Not for nothing. I just want to disturb them.
Boothe!
- Calm down, man. - Wait! Wait!
What do you want?
- Cheers. For your health. - You bastard.
Come here, fat fucker!
That's a new seat.
Don't wake up again.
Wow! Really beaten!
OK, step aside. Move aside, move aside, move aside.
Buck, go rest.
Boothe is beaten to a halt.
Yes, he is still breathing.
Nobody wins today.
Good business, Wade.
I was found out. I choose Boothe in death bets. Who did you choose?
Yes, Wade, about that...
No.
You don't bet for my death, right?
You bet for my death. Wow, Fuck, You're the worst friend in the world.
You're kidding me. My age will be up to 102 years.
I just died. In the city of Detroit.
I'm sorry. I just... I want to get the money.
I have never been anything.
Whatever.
Mercenaries, drinks I pay!
Local brands, not imported ones.
Honey, you sure you want to spend all your money?
Just a little.
- Vanessa. - Wade.
Why can girls like this be in this good place?
I put your ass.
Buck, you'd better apologize before...
Yes, that.
Uncover the spell, fat Gandalf.
- I'm sorry. - Breathe from the nose.
I don't have an filter between my brain and...
Release it. Okay. Hey...
Hakuna his tatas. He is cured.
Get out of here. Go. Read the spell.
Hey. Don't touch "my merchandise."
Merchandise?
So you...
sell yourself for money?
Yes.
A difficult childhood?
More difficult than your childhood.
My father left before I was born.
My father left before I was conceived my mother.
Have you ever been on a cigarette?
Which part of my body has never been?
I was abused.
Me too. By my uncle.
My uncles. Take turns.
I saw my birthday party through the cupboard keyhole...
which is also locked in...
Your room. That's still profitable. I sleep in a dishwasher.
You can still sleep in a dishwasher.
I don't even know how to sleep.
24 hours a week my mouth is stuffed with balls, black outside white inside, very painful.
Who can do it?
Hopefully you, tonight?
Hey, what I got for $ 275 and...
a yogurt voucher card?
Honey, it's 48 minutes for everything you want.
And low-fat desserts.
Does he put a voucher in your mouth?
Time to put the ball in the hole.
You say it's up to me.
I understand.
You would rather throw a ball.
Rather than vagina.
Not so.
I just want to get to know you more closely.
Not just like 2 dimensional sex objects sold by Hollywood.
Enter the ball.
Be prepared to lose tragically.
Just do it, champ.
OK.
Limited edition Voltron: Protector of the Universe, please.
OK. This is it.
I've been aiming for this for a long time.
And I want a pencil eraser.
OK.
You are now planet protector Arus.
And you can delete...
anything written in pencil.
M'lady?
Actually I don't want to say this...
but your 48 minutes have passed.
Hey, how many more minutes can I get with this?
These five little lion robots can join _ into one super robot, so...
Five little lion robots? Three minutes.
Agree.
What can we do with two minutes, thirty seven seconds?
Holding intimate?
How long can we be like this?
Full year?
Happy Valentine's day.
Happy Chinese New Year.
Year of the dog.
Relax.
And Happy International Women's Day.
No. No. No.
Congratulations 40 days before Easter.
- Wade? - Sorry.
Happy Halloween.
Happy Thanksgiving.
I love you.
If your left foot is Thanksgiving...
And your right foot is Christmas...
Can I visit in the second half of the day?
His sweater is severe.
But red seems right for you.
Red is your color.
Like blood that is out of your eyes.
Look, I think...
Really?
About why we can match.
Why is that?
Your madness is comparable with me. Exclaimed
And, we are like two pieces complicated puzzles...
Which if put together will be an image that can be seen from above.
Right.
Wade...
there is something I want I ask you.
But because you rarely have I haven't had time to ask.
Will you...
- put it in... - Marry me?
My Ass?
Where did you hide it?
Everywhere.
They say the bonus is a month salary. So...
Do you mean?
I want to.
That is indeed my intention.
I love you, Wade Wilson.
You should... So that is...
Yes!
I feel like a little girl.
What if you hugged and I never took it off again?
Always together like Yoda and Luke.
Joke Star Wars.
The emperor.
Oh God. I like just creating you from a computer.
Hey.
Perfect.
- Look. - Okay, it's time to pee.
Shake it, huh.
This is the point.
Life is like the last carriage of a series of trains colliding...
with a little time to pause advertising happiness.
This is the last advertisement break.
Which means it's time to return to the regular schedule.
What's up...
Oh God. Wade?
You must be kidding.
You're not kidding me?
I feel it's joking.
People show different reactions when know end-stage cancer.
There are still choices for us. New drugs continue to be developed every day.
So what should we do?
Of course there are we can do.
My uncle Ivan was diagnosed with thyroid cancer...
and there is a new experimental drug from Germany.
Vanessa already has plans A, B, to Z.
me? I remember the details of his face.
Like the first time times I saw it.
Or last time.
Mr. Wilson...
Mr. Wilson?
Think before you decide.
The most important thing is not to hurry.
Now, if I'm a 200-pound bastard named Francis, where will I hide?
Silence passes when newcomers are full of sensations Wade W. Wilson...
bringing Regina's work Saskatchewan, start acting.
The appearance is very good.
And because that's the poem Regina sounds fun.
Hadririn all, who are you watching...
is a sweet revenge.
Give him revenge.
Feel this!
This is the most unsportsmanlike thing at all levels!
Look carefully, Francis. Take a break. Looks like you fell while catching the ball.
Remember? No?
How is it now?
The bastard Wade Wilson.
Hello, handsome.
Yes, it seems like I am a little stung by radioactive Shar-Pei.
Yes. And whose fault is that, huh, Francis?
Yes, it's time to return what I did to my face.
Come on, you should thank me. I have made you immortal.
I'm actually jealous of you.
Yes, but this is not life which is worthy of me, right?
Now, what I will do to you is like Limp Bizkit did in the music world in the late 90s.
Father?
I think we all agree if this is is the most colossal part.
Well, maybe not too colossal too.
This is my most valuable treasure.
Wham?
No, no, no. Wham!
"Make It Big" is the best-selling album of George and Andy.
So, I have to smile and wave at the front door?
Think of this as spring.
If the spring isn't over yet.
Oh God, if only every penny I keep in Bernadette Peters.
It seems that you did.
Bernadette won't go anywhere, because you won't go anywhere.
Drink.
You're right. Cancer is only in my heart, lungs, prostate, and brain.
Without all that I can still live.
Your place is in this house.
Surrounded by your Voltron and your Bernadette, and me.
Look, we both know if this cancer is like a garbage show.
Like, Yakov Smirnoff was the opening band for Spin Doctor's performance at Iowa Fair which was also rubbish.
And I'll take you to the event.
I want you to remember me.
Not only at Christmas.
Yes, I will remember us.
I swear to God, I will find you in the next life...
I will turn "Careless Whisper" out loud outside your window.
Wham!
There is no such thing. Okay?
We can fight this.
Besides that, I just realized something.
You have won. Your life is officially more chaotic than my life.
I love you.
Wade.
Weas.
Looks like you need oral sex and bathing.
According to the bathing rules first.
What about three Patron shots?
Or what about "Triticum aestivum," wheat grass.
Very good for the immune system.
Jesus Christ. You sound like Vanessa.
This, look.
He sent me all brochures this colorful clinic.
I'm sure everything is FDA approved.
Chechnya. Isn't that a place to cure cancer?
There are China and Central Mexico.
Do you know "cancer" in Spanish?
No.
El Cancer.
I can guess that.
Look at how happy you are here.
Objection if I save this? Install it, so I remember when you still looked alive.
At least now I will win the death bet.
Now you will die tragically because of cancer.
I understand, weas. thanks.
And the guy there is looking for you.
Really the type of "Grim Reaper."
I don't know. You better go there.
Boothe.
Wade.
Mr. Wilson.
What can I do for you?
Besides fishing children to enter your Van.
I understand you've just been diagnosed with cancer.
New warning.
This is my job. Recruit.
I'm concerned if you have to leave.
But you're a fighter. Special force.
41 times kill.
One every seven weeks.
The same time for some people to cut their hair.
Honey if you throw it away.
It's hard to forget things that are so impressive.
And now you spend your day for these little people...
People can change. What do you want?
I represent organizations that might be able to help you.
What if I say we can cure your cancer?
And more, giving you the ability that most men dream of?
You sound like an ad, but is ugly like the Slap Chop ad.
You're not "shuffled" huh?
The world needs extraordinary soldiers.
We will not only make you better.
We will make you the best of the best.
A super hero.
Listen to Agent Smith, I've tried the hero business and it makes me have a lot of scars.
But if I get sentenced to death, I will definitely find you.
Damn. 500 yards from here is a school, you might want...
The drink he paid for himself.
What did he say?
Hey, why?
Hey. Sorry.
I have a bad dream about Liam Neeson.
I dream of kidnapping her daughter but she doesn't have a daughter.
Hey, they have made the film trilogy.
After three series (TAKEN) you must consider if he (Liam Neeson) is a bad parent.
The worst part of cancer is not what it does to you...
But what it does to the people you love.
Who knows if this person can save my life...
But I know there is only one way that can save his life.
Isn't that what the super heroes do?
OK. Let's discuss "Pro-Counter" about this super hero.
Pro: They eradicate criminals.
Get discounts for laundry.
The offer to play a profitable film, the original and additional stories are merged into one.
Cons: They are all really boring and lame.
You know, I can hear you.
I don't talk to you. I talk to the audience.
Stay here.
You have been warned before, Deadpool.
This is a careless and embarrassing use of your supernatural power.
You two come with us.
Listen to Colossus, I don't have time for this nonsense now!
And you?
Negasonic, Teenage War.
Negasonic, Teenagers... What kind of name is that?
That's the coolest name ever!
So what, are you the companion huh?
No. Coach.
Let me guess.
X-Men leave you or what? Want to tell me the details?
Who made you?
I pretend I don't know you are here, Negasonic, Teenage War.
Can we exchange names?
Can we go?
Listen! I'm a teenage girl.
I would rather be in anywhere as long as it's not here.
I prefer long silence...
followed by sadistic comments, is continued by silence.
So this will be like that, huh? Long long silence...
or sadistic comments? Come on.
You can guess me.
We can't allow this, Deadpool.
Please, take good care.
You're the turkey from chrome!
That's not good.
Do you really want to ruin my plan?
Believe me, the bastard in that is the one who started it.
He is really evil.
Besides... No one was hurt.
That person is already there when I get here.
Wade, you're better than this.
- Join. Use your strength for good. - Raise your head.
Be a super hero.
Listen!
Someday if I will decide to become a fighter to eradicate crime...
a roommate with a group of children small whistles in the Neverland mansion...
with a terrible bald old man who looks like that heaven's doorkeeper bastard.
On that day...
I will send an application for to be your happy friend.
But until then, I will do what I have to do here.
Even if you have to beat up bitch like you!
- Wade... - Hey.
Shut your mouth! Sinnead (O'Connor)
Hey, douche-pool!
And I hope you watch...
Quite unfortunate.
Enough enough!
Canada!
That's not good.
Wade, come on.
Blow to the penis!
Poor your wife.
You really have to stop.
All dinosaurs fear T. Rex.
I promise this will be more bad for you, boy is big!
It's embarrassing.
Don't wake up again.
Have you ever heard of a person who has legs one wins in a karate contest?
Don't you have a switch switch?
Yes, it's right next to my prostate. or is it a live switch?
Enough!
Let's go talk to Professor.
McAvoy or Stewart?
The plot of this film is very confusing.
"Live or die, you come with me!"
You will recover, Wade.
You always do that.
Have you ever watched "127 Hours?" Warning for viewers.
Oh God.
Disgusting.
It's a burst of money, honey.
Are you there God? This is me, Margaret.
Stone collides with the buttocks.
And when your life ends is incredibly chaotic...
Usually you think back when you made a big bad decision.
The only decision that sent you to the Shitsburgh road.
This? This is my decision.
Mr. Wilson.
Nothing makes my heart warm other than making changes to others.
You were finally sentenced to death.
Promise me you will do the best for me.
So I can do the best for others.
Of course.
And please don't make me tight green costumes.
Or make me a CGI animation.
Road! Keep going.
This place is like a mental hospital.
My first request is hand warmers.
And, Jesus, this is a heating table.
You should say words. that calms me down, buddy.
I think like will be cut into pieces.
Calm down.
Are you not too strong for the size of a woman?
I just call Wang.
What is the match for?
Oral fixation or are you a fan of heavy Stallone?
Patience, Angel.
All the time.
Are you an additional waiter here or what?
We get one more babbler.
I'm just happy on my first day was in a super hero camp.
Shut your mouth.
Yuan Wilson, my name is Ajax.
I manage this place.
I used to say full of euphemisms like...
"This might be a little painful." "This can cause some inconvenience."
But I've been lazy to say it.
This workshop does not belong to the government.
This is a private institution that changes people like you...
being a man of extraordinary ability.
But if you think super powers are obtained without pain...
That's wrong.
I inject you with a serum that activates every mutant gene hidden in your DNA.
For the serum to work we must make you experience extreme stress.
You've heard the saying, "Making eggs omelet must break the eggs," right?
I will hurt you, Wade.
I used to be a patient here too, you know.
This treatment has a different effect on each person.
That makes Angel very strong.
In my case, it increases my reflexes.
I cut off my nerve endings, so I no longer feel pain.
And, in fact, I no longer feel anything.
Thank you! thanks. thanks.
There is something in your teeth.
Right in the middle. Only, I don't...
A seemingly or cucumber nugget or whatever.
That bothers me.
Makes you look funny.
Ajax is your real name? Sounds suspicious.
What is your real name?
Kevin? Bruce? Scott?
Mitch? The Rickster?
What is Basil Fawlty?
Keep on talking.
One thing that has never survived in this place is a sense of humor.
We'll see.
I think so.
He is yours.
Come on.
You will leave me alone here with this angry Rosie O'Donnell?
This is how it works.
Adrenaline acts as a catalyst for serum...
So we will have to make you suffer.
If you are lucky, mutant genes will be active and form in a spectacular way.
If not, then we must continue to hurt you...
in a new and different way that is more painful than the previous way...
Until you finally mutate.
Or die.
Do you mean like a list of requests before I die?
Like making love.
I really want to ignite Olympic torch flame.
Operated on me.
Don't forget to play naked with WNBA Sacramento Monarchs members.
Everything on my request list will involve public nudity.
Finally, give Meredith the Dutch Baxter-Birney oven.
No. Receive a Dutch oven from Meredith Baxter-Birney.
Make banana pancakes for my children.
Vanessa.
I want to meet Vanessa.
You're beautiful.
I don't know anyone else, but I'm touched.
We are just kidding.
No, no. It is okay.
I just divert attention.
You don't want to give up on us, right?
Hey, don't trust him, Cunningham.
How can he be a hero...
if it's called Francis?
Francis?
That's the real name.
He gets the name "Ajax" from dish soap.
F-R-A-N-C-I...
Oops!
I got it from the laundry tag your lab coat.
I might be able to give you discounts for super heroes.
You're really annoying.
Thank you.
I've never heard of that.
Why can't you help us all by closing your mouth?
Or I just sew your mouth.
I won't do that if I become you.
See, the problem lies in this 24-hour non-stop torture...
You can start there first.
Is that what you think?
If this can't open your mutation, then...
There will be no other way.
Now, what we will do is reduce the oxygen concentration in the air...
to the right point so that you feel like you are suffocating.
If your brain waves slow down, means you will faint...
At that time we will increase the concentration of oxygen again.
If your heart rate slows...
Means you can breathe...
We will decrease again oxygen concentration.
And that's where we will leave you. There.
And I think all of you were once penis.
Do you know the most funny part of this?
You still think we will make you a super hero.
you. Dismissed with disrespect.
Prostitutes with the cheapest rates.
You're nobody.
A little secret, Wade.
This workshop doesn't make heroes super, we make super slaves.
We will install a control collar on you and auction you into the highest bidder.
Who knows what they will tell you?
Terrorizing citizens, paralyzing freedom fighters.
Maybe just to cut occasional grass.
What is wrong with you?
You will never go home after this.
Now it's a tough face.
Wait, wait! Wait. Wait.
Seriously, there really is left over food in your teeth now.
Enjoy your weekend.
Weekend? Come on.
Come on?
Did I say this a love story?
No, this is a horror movie.
Fuck.
Looks like someone lost his spirit when he returned home.
What have you done to me?
I increase your stress level high enough to trigger mutations.
You sadistic bastard!
I have healed you, Wade.
Now your mutated cell can cure anything.
It will kill your cancer cell as soon as it is formed.
Yes, I have seen similar side effects _ before.
I can cure it...
But where is the fun?
Now, I will close you again, Wade.
Not because it must.
But because I want to.
Oh, alright.
Please.
You smell like a carcass.
Bastard.
It's okay. It is okay.
I think we owe it to for that one, huh?
You go. Go.
Go.
Quick questions.
What is my name?
I don't think so.
Sorry, Francis. My lips are locked.
You don't want to kill me.
I'm the only one who can fix your ugly face.
What is my name?
Wade.
I don't just get drugs for El Cancer...
I have medicine for all El.
But there is one thing...
What really matters.
Come on, let's go.
Oh, it must be sick.
Thank you very much.
God, he's so filthy.
Look at his face.
Oh God. Poor man.
Honey, don't look at it.
Freaks.
No. I can't make his life as bad as my life.
Come on, Wade, it won't be that bad.
Bullshit!
I am an inner monster. I should go to the circus.
Wade, Vanessa loves you. He doesn't care what you...
Do you like what you see?
No.
You are like an avocado that makes love to avocados the older ones, avocados that are more disgusting.
Yes.
Somewhat rude. It seems like he won't like it.
There is something wrong with this relationship...
Only by decreasing emotion can it be passed without violence.
And the only person who can fix this ugly face...
Is an English bastard who runs a mutant factory.
And he's gone. Puf!
Yes, you have to do something to fix this...
Because now, you only have one choice.
Very true.
- Find Francis. - Become a star in horror movies.
What?
Starred in your own horror movie.
Because you look like Freddy Krueger with Utah's topographical map face.
This is what I will do.
I will track him through his crew until someone hands over Francis...
I forced him to fix this, then shot his head...
until the brain is hollow.
I don't want to see or think about it again.
But that bastard thinks you're dead, right?
Yes.
That's good. Let just like that.
Then what, I have to wear a mask?
Yes. A very thick mask. All the time.
I'm sorry...
you're scary.
Your face can make people have nightmares.
Like a testicle with teeth.
You will die alone.
I mean, if you can die.
Ideally, for the sake of others.
That will happen.
What you need now is costume and nickname...
Like Wade the Comedian...
Or Scary Satan, Mr. Can't Die.
Damn.
What?
I risk all my money on you and now...
I just realized that I would never win...
Deadpool.
Captain Deadpool.
No, enough...
- Deadpool, yes. - Deadpool only.
For you, Mr. Pool.
Deadpool. Sounds like a franchise brand.
This will definitely be crazy.
Where is Francis?
Seltzer and lemon for removes blood stains.
Or just use red clothes. Stupid.
Don't make me ask twice.
Where...
Francis?
He made me ask twice.
Does the mask dampen my voice?
Where is Francis?
Where is the fucker Francis?
You will be killed by Zamboni.
Where is Francis?
No! I beg you!
Oh God! I am so sorry!
You're a small spider monkey!
Where... Francis?
This is confusing.
Does it look sexy if you hit you? Or is it sexier if you don't hit you?
I mean, the difference is unclear... Blur.
WHERE IS FRANCIS?
Say where your damn boss is or you will die!
In five minutes!
Don't hesitate to contact me.
Nice to meet you, Jared.
I've been walking all the way...
Your weapon is full yes.
41 times kill.
Now 89. Almost 90.
Mr. Wilson?
You look very alive.
Only outside.
- I will end badly, right? - There is no good ending for you, no.
Where is your boss?
I can tell you exactly...
Oh, you will tell me, but first...
The audience might not want to see this.
Now this little pig goes to...
Thank you, Agent Smith.
Taxi!
Enter it! Good day for sightseeing.
You must know next.
Oops! You should not be able to see that.
That's where. I'm over.
We arrive.
Sorry for bleeding over your garbage.
Seltzer and lemon for blood stains.
Some types of anger cannot be managed...
as for example your years plan is destroyed by the wrong person!
The saying says, when the time comes you get hurt, there is no other place like home.
And I share that house with someone you have seen, blind woman from laundry, Al.
God, I miss cocaine.
He.
4 layers of walls, each of which contains 4 layers of walls.
Means there are 16 layers of walls.
He is like Robin for Batman, except that he is old and black and blind.
And I think he has a crush on me.
Wait, I'm sure Robin loves Batman, too.
Al?
Morning, sleeper.
It smells like an old woman's pants here.
Yes, I'm old. And I wear pants.
But you're not a woman (honorable).
Oh, very comfortable.
Instead of being blind, I haven't seen you wearing Crocs sandals.
You mean, big rubber shoes for me to masturbate?
Yes, I know.
Instead of being blind...
I heard everything in this duplex.
Sit on a stick.
Bactin?
Yes. Bactin must do it.
What if Kullen comes along too? IKEA don't assemble the items yourself, you know.
You tell me. I don't care about Kullen.
Hurdal has increased.
Never mind. Everything is better than Hurdal.
I prefer Hemnes or Trysil than Hurdal.
No, I'm not excited until I see Kullen.
Screw, please.
Here? Now? Just kidding.
I've known it for decades.
You will be surprised.
Pretty disgusting.
Ta... Da.
I hope I never heard of Craigslist again.
My wise words, "Look for roommates, imperfect blind people."
"Must be skilled in using his hands."
Or do you prefer me to assemble the IKEA, and do you pay for the rent?
Why did you become annoying this morning?
Let's repeat.
The bastard who changed me became weird like this...
Successfully escaped my hand today...
My hand.
Capturing it is my only chance to be handsome again, grabbing my super sexy boyfriend again...
And prevent this nonsense happens to other people.
So, yes, today is quite fun like masturbating with sandpaper.
Fart is passing through.
Found out who our friend in the red suit is.
Find out who our friend is wearing the red costume.
The bastard Wade Wilson.
I will also use a mask, if I face like that.
I hope I also recover quickly like him.
However, we will make him suffer.
In our way.
Right. And if he gets well again?
He won't be able to.
Not if there is nothing left to cure.
You know, this is funny. I miss the bastard.
I like challenges.
But he is bad for business.
Now let's find him.
Need Tylenol (Anti-pain)?
You can throw it where you throw Bactin.
I prefer Percocet...
if I wear it I must already be orbiting to Saturn now.
But I appreciate your attention.
I'm crazy or your hand really small?
The size of a KFC fork.
I understand why you're cranky...
But your mood will never be nice until you meet this woman...
And tell how you feel.
What have I told you, Mrs. Magoo? He won't accept me.
If you can see me, you will understand.
Appearance is not everything.
Appearance is everything.
Have you ever heard David Beckham talk?
He sounds like he is oral sex with a can of helium.
Do you think Ryan Reynolds can do this with that amazing acting talent?
Love is blind, Wade.
No.
You're blind.
So you just lie down there and keep whining?
No, I will wait until this hand reaches puberty...
And then I will start again with the new Christmas plan.
Meanwhile, you might want to leave here.
I am sure that my hand will feel great.
Go, go, go...
So, the doctor said, "The bad news is you don't have a long time to live."
Then, the patient asks, "How long do I have?"
The doctor said, "Five."
The patient asks again, "What five?"
The doctor said, "Four, three, two..."
What can I help Miss?
I hope so.
I heard you might be able to show me where my friend is.
His name is Wade Wilson.
Sorry.
I don't know that name.
Hey, you can't enter behind the bar.
I've seen this girl.
That must be Vanessa. I have heard a lot about him.
Honey, you might have to look around you.
This is not the right place for to do something like this.
Calm down, Angel.
Lower the little man.
We already can what we need now.
Are you sure?
You don't want to wear clothes that are not monochrome?
Have fun in your midnight which is like the Blade II movie.
Thank you for helping me, friends.
Wade, we have a problem. And what I mean by "We," is "You."
I can't believe I did this.
Is there a word for half fear, and half angry? (Afraid and Angry)
Yes, "Afrangry," I think.
Have you decided what will you say to him?
Fuck me (love me)!
It is better not to start with that.
Hey, going to the stage now...
Give a welcome to Chastity!
Or like I often call him, Irony.
It is better to find him immediately before those crazy people.
How do you know he's here?
Because I am constantly stalking the fox.
Every time I see it, is like the first time...
Especially from this angle.
You can't buy love, but you can rent it for three minutes.
You're a bastard!
Come on!
Come on, do it together. This is not for me, this is for Vanessa.
Let's go.
Full power.
Vanessa.
Someone looks for you behind. Talk about your old girlfriend.
I know it's you.
Strange pieces.
Like a puzzle.
You have to thank _ for Wade Wilson for this.
Hey. Hey! Where is he going?
I see him back. Go find him, tiger.
Bastard!
- Wait, wait. Come on... - Penis shaker...
- We can talk about what we will... - Jiminy! Shattered face!
Okay, or you can hit it.
- Yes, yes, yes. - Damn! Shit!
- No, no. OK. Hey! - Damn! Shit!
- Damn! - Hey.
Calm down. Quiet. Okay.
OK. I think it's a good start.
I will tear this bastard...
Wait.
- Find it! Find it. - What?
- I will be angry. - Okay. OK.
OK. Okay. OK.
This. This is Vanessa.
- What? - No, wait. This is Francis.
He wants you to come to him.
- What is that? - That's an emoticon.
You know, it turns out to be feces with a smiling face and eyes?
I thought it was chocolate yogurt.
I need a weapon.
Okay, which one?
I need all weapons!
OK. Okay.
That's about 3,000 rounds.
We all know what I can do with 12 rounds.
Hey, hey, be careful with that, Ronnie Milsap!
We will fight.
I will spend the night assembling Borje, but this one interests me.
I said, we will use Urvaj, not Borje.
Do that or leave here.
Damn. Only those at home.
Don't. Come on. Come on. Pack it up.
Fast, fast, fast.
The one below, below, below.
Damn you.
Caliber 0.45. I like it.
Wade...
I will go with you, but I don't want to.
Listen, Al...
If I never see you again, I want you to know that I love you so much.
Also, there are about 116 kilos of cocaine buried somewhere in this apartment...
Hopefully enough for the cost of treating your blindness. Good luck.
Do you want to make love?
Tie him here.
Please.
Thank you, Stump Penis. And you mean what I mean.
Wow. You're babbling too. You and Wade.
I've tried to tell you a bastard, You've caught the wrong girl.
My old girlfriend, she's dead.
Look, I think so too. But he keeps coming back again.
Like cockroaches...
But it's worse.
Now, I'm not hurt heart, but he is.
Let's see how he fights with me as my hostage.
Ripley, from Alien 3!
Fuck you old man.
Fake laughs. Hide real pain.
Go call the Silver Seed.
Will you fight? This morning?
It seems like something is wrong with eating before dusk or to save money.
No, do you know the bad guys that you released?
He caught my girl.
You have to help me get it back.
Wade? That's you?
Yes, this is me, Deadpool, and I have an offer that you can't refuse.
I will wait here, okay?
This is a big house. It's funny if I just see you two.
Looks like this film producer can't afford to pay another X-Man.
And that is why, in my opinion...
Film Cocoon is pure pornography.
Who brings this sparkling man?
Sparkles, but deadly.
My friend the Silver Penis agrees to do this for me.
Instead, I will consider to join the boy band.
That's not a boy band.
Of course not.
So you succeeded won Gita again?
I try to hold my love tightly, Mr. Pool...
But Bandhu is more deft and handsome than me.
I think you're quite handsome too.
Dopinder?
What is that sound?
That's Bandhu in the trunk.
Whose tire?
My romantic competitor Bandhu. He is bound in the trunk.
I do like you say, DP.
I plan to get her stomach out like tandoori fish, then throw away her carcass in front of Gita's door.
I didn't tell him to do that.
Of course not. He translate it.
Dopinder, this is not a way to win Gita's heart!
I'm very proud of you.
Release Bandhu, safely and full of tenderness.
Kill him.
Then, win Gita back...
in the old way, use your childish charm.
Cheating him.
He is really deadly.
Tos five fingers?
For you? Ten fingers.
Okay, friends, let's go out and make changes.
You know what to do.
Kill them all, Pool Boy!
It's time to make Chimi Changas.
Rarely are there people who ravage your face...
Eliminate your sanity, kidnap your baby's mother in the future...
And personally destroy four of five special moments in your life.
Say, this starts to look like Christmas.
Hey.
Where is your backpack?
Bandhu?
Leave a message and have fun.
Stupid!
Let's do this the old way...
With a pair of swords and full power.
Play the music.
Wade Wilson!
What is my name?
I will do it for you.
Teach them.
Super Heroes land.
He will make a hero landing super. I waited for that.
Super Heroes land!
You know, that's really hurt your knees.
Really impractical. They all do it.
You are a beautiful woman, but I save myself for Francis.
That's why I brought it.
I don't like hitting women, so please...
I mean, that's why I took it?
Oh no, finish first your tweet. That's not... That's...
Wait a minute first. Yes.
Now that's it. That hashtag.
Break him, tiger.
I feel sorry for the man who will be with him on the high school night.
OK. Shoot!
Complete the bitch's bitch!
Take care of your language, please.
Ah, just suck on your penism.
Don't look, kid.
Don't look!
Wait!
Stop the shot!
Friend! Hey! Hey!
You only work for the Muppet farting bastard.
So, I give you a chance to put your gun down...
in this case, gently...
maybe like a goodbye fine pair of lovers.
Good.
Command!
Tea bags!
Bob?
Wade?
Oh, God, I haven't seen you since...
- Jacksonville. Friday. - Since the TGIF event.
How are you ?!
How are children? Good?
And Gail? He still cooks tuna casseroles?
Very good! But bad for the waist, if you know what I'm talking about.
Your breasts... Left. You're a beautiful woman.
That's so sweet.
Thank you.
F R A N C I S Did he write your name too. She's so romantic.
Don't worry, honey. I come.
Shoot!
Hey!
Get up!
Bastard...
That bastard should wear his brown pants.
You're right, beautiful.
Red is really my favorite color.
Wade?
Don't worry, honey...
I will get you out of the damn box.
Is there a better way to bring it back to you?
Oh, I never left it.
But you do that, bastard!
Inhale, baby.
Oh wait.
The wrong choice of words.
I hope they have decided every nerve you feel.
Because if not, I will do it!
I hear you can regenerate the body part now, Wade.
When I'm finished later...
You have to regrow many parts of your body.
Especially the one.
Yes, especially that one.
Let's dance.
Dancing, I mean...
Let's kill each other.
OK. Use fists.
Sounds like your last Sunday night.
Bastard!
Hold on, honey!
- Wade! I caught you!
I have a plan. But you won't like that.
Damn! Shit! Shit!
Don't worry. I can handle it.
Damn!
Full power!
Thank you.
Slow down.
Oh God! That's very...
Don't talk anymore!
You and I will correct this.
What?
Basic you're stupid idiot.
Do you really think there is a cure... for that?
What?
You heard me.
No.
Nothing!
So you want to say...
After all this, you can't repair my face?
It sounds more stupid when you say it.
Like a fool who admits he can't do anything so I can let him live?
Is there a final message?
What is my name?
Who cares?
Wade!
There are four or five moments.
Sorry?
Only four or five moments are needed.
For?
Become a hero.
People think being a hero is a job every time.
Wake up to be a hero, brush your teeth into heroes, go to work as a hero.
Not true.
In a lifetime, there are only four or five moments that are really important.
Moments when you offer choices.
To sacrifice, conquer criminals, save friends...
Forgive your enemies.
In these moments...
The other thing goes away.
The way the world sees us.
The way we...
Why?
You chatter on.
Of course, I might look like pepperoni bread...
But at least the bastard won't be able to recover again.
If you wear pants tight superheroes...
that means I have to forgive psychopaths...
Then maybe next time I won't wear it again.
Not everyone is like you.
Promise me...
Yes, yes, I will be cautious in the next four moments.
Oh damn it.
Now, if you allow me, I'm just a man, who will stand in front of a girl...
And tell him...
What should I say to him ?!
You better think about it yourself.
I can't talk...
I deserve it. That is, too.
No, no, no, don't do that.
Start talking!
I'm sorry.
I am very sorry.
For all, forgive I for leaving you...
I'm sorry because I didn't give you news as soon as possible.
Those are difficult years.
Difficult?
I live in a narrow house.
With 12 family members.
Every night we scramble to eat.
Everyone tries to defeat Noelle. He is the most fatest.
There is nothing we don't share. Rooms, dental floss, even condoms.
So you live in a house.
I should have come and meet you sooner.
But, honey, the person behind this mask, is not the person you ever remembered.
Do you mean this mask?
And this one.
To guard if the other is released.
OK. Yes, only...
That's a plaster, just...
Oow... Yeah.
Wait, wait, wait...
Are you sure?
I'm sure.
Wow.
Yes.
Hey...
After a little adjustment...
And a little drink...
This face...
I would love to make love to him.
Behind this costume I am also the same person.
No.
I have a super penis.
Come on, Wade. Take care of your language.
There are small children here.
What are you still doing here?
Get out of here. Go and make yourself useful!
You, be a good brother.
Tell the Beast to stop defecating on my page.
And you, chicken bakmie...
Nothing compares to you. (Nothing Compares To You)
Sinnead O Connor, 1990. Sorry.
No problem. You're cool.
What does it say?
That's not what I mean! I am proud of you!
We will make uniforms X-Men for you, Wade.
For a while, it feels like we are like three little lion robots...
who joins to form one super robot.
That's stupid.
Yes.
And now is the time I have been waiting for.
Come here.
Wham! As I promised.
See?
You don't need to be a hero super to get the girl.
The right girl will bring out of the hero in you.
Now, let's finish this epic scene. Camera backs up.
Yes, that's good.
That will be the only interesting scene tonight.
Who doesn't like the end who is happy isn't it?
See you again, this is your friend The friendly Pool will sing...
♪ I'm never gonna dance again ♪ ♪ the way I danced with you. ♪
DEADPOOL WILL RETURN AFTER CREDIT
Transfer Language By: Ry @ Di, Samarinda, April 28, 2016.
Are you still here?
The movie has run out. Go home.
You expect a teaser for Deadpool 2. We don't have that much money.
What do you expect? Sam Jackson appeared?
With eye patch and skin costume?
Go. Go.
But I can tell you one thing, and that's a little secret.
For the sequel, we will have Cable.
Amazing characters. Bionic arm, time travel.
We don't know who the cast is, but can be anyone.
We only need a big man with a section on a flat head. Can Mel Gibson, Dolph Lundgren...
Keira Knightley. He also counts. Who knows.
The point is still confidential.
And don't leave your trash scattered. That is truly immoral.
Go home. Delivered by: www.subtitlecinema.com