∩╗┐1 00: 00: 31,838 -> 00:00: 32,960 - When you heard the first computer,
fax machine, female lawyer.
Where do you think they all came from?
Silicon Valley?
Maybe even New York.
No, this is Iowa.
The only house division 1A football stadium
named after African-American, Jack Trice.
Who attends Iowa State University in their 20s.
She's the second African-Americans compete at soccer colleges at major universities.
Who is the first one?
Frank Holbrook, who plays for
University of Iowa a decade earlier.
During the Civil War,
76,534 Iowans served at The Union.
No other country has a higher percentage
from the male population serving.
This is Waterloo.
Waterloo, Iowa.
This city, with the biggest tractor ever made.
This is East High.
Record for the longest football winning streak
in the state.
Strangely, the note
for the longest losing streak too.
But whatever.
Hey, Cedar Falls, suck my cock from behind
to show that in the first film.
Waterloo West High.
Highest wrestler middle school
all the time, and Gable.
Waterloo is the biggest house
US Navy family, Sullivan family.
Sullivan brothers all died on the same ship
in the South Pacific during World War II.
This is a story that inspired the film,
Saving Ryan soldier.
But my Waterloo city,
that's where you will get
Real American experience.
A big glass of Scotch,
lots of good food,
and original conversation.
- American Pie is awesome.
- I don't trust the child from Rookie of the Year
get Tara Reid.
- Harold is not aware of this.
Who is the child of Rookie of the Year?
- Thomas Ian Nicholas, if I ever met him,
I will tell him The Floater is rubbish.
- Tara Reid is hot.
- I like the part where dude
put his cock on the cake.
- How do you know he's a Jew?
- Because his father is Eugene Levy, Jewish.
- You come very antisemitically.
You need to work on it.
- The internal Clinton nailed is a Jew.
- You know, in 20 years,
our president, they will marry a model
and hijacking porn stars.
- You are a Neanderthal.
- Since your parents divorced,
your weekend with you extraordinary father.
- Thank you father,
to allow us to watch movies with a R. rating - Kissing Mom, that's funny.
- I prefer Americans More beauty than American Pie.
This will win an Oscar.
- I prefer to see a Jewish screw cake above the plastic bag in the wind every day.
- Daddy keeps asking me how many times
new boyfriend is coming,
appears about three times a week.
Mom comes around seven or eight.
Stop being gay like that, Daddy.
Move, get a girl,
sell more Saturn or something.
- If you need to talk about your feelings,
after the divorce, Harold is a good listener.
- Feelings?
I have two Christmas now, you chew chicken.
- Hey, where is Taylor?
- He depends on the girl he met.
She's here for summer.
- What is this, Fat?
ΓΓ¬ That summer, night Γ¬
- I prefer Grease 2.
A much better film.
Music scene, much better.
The best bowling scene in film history.
- Taylor will sell his friends
for girls anytime.
Pervert, Dee tried to tell him
to keep his hands for himself.
- I will wait for the right boyfriend.
Harold is classy.
I want a woman of the same standard.
- Fag.
- There's no way Richard Gere left
to save you if you are a prostitute.
- Yes, I think he made out with him.
You don't kiss prostitutes in the mouth.
- No.
- They will bite the tip of your tongue.
- They will bite it.
- Like shame in men.
- Wait, man Sham-Wow.
- You know people from infomercials
with shammy.
- Yes
He flirts with prostitutes.
And he bit the tip of his tongue.
- Damn it!
- A little straight away.
You don't kiss prostitutes in the mouth.
- Nothing.
And Richard Gere gave the money
go shopping?
- No no.
- He will take him in the alley,
bent over the trash, and said,
"Yes, take the pig!"
- Now that's a film I will really
leave, I will pay money to see that.
- Yes, we think we are above men
in this area, but we are just as depraved.
How many copies
from Fifty Shades of Gray sold?
Three blockbuster films.
- God.
Honestly, I mean, I will not see that rich man
working on that girl,
than watching a damn Notebook.
- I prefer my Catholic grandmother
catch me watching hardcore
gay porn
than watching a damn Notebook.
- Gay porn is the best.
That's a real romance film.
- Well, no, watch some twink
turns into some hairy bears,
hot.
- Yes, take the pig.
- Hey, where is Tanner?
- I don't know, friend.
I don't think of his fiancee likes him to hang out with me.
- Why?
- He treats me like I from Marshal Town, man.
I'll take him to Tiger Den.
He will ride using meth,
swinging on the stripper.
- Well, he really has to do it pick you up last week
four o'clock in the morning.
- This is a different man.
Dave's record made some Vegas killer bombs.
Look at you man.
Maybe you're the problem.
Maybe he can't come here because of you.
You look like
the devil uses Tommy Bahama.
- Hi friend,
This crap makes me get whatever I want.
And you are also not a peach.
- I know.
An adult man wearing a Justin Bieber jacket.
Maybe he's a little right.
But still, fuck him.
- Dude,
You told him to tell him
he's in a real library.
- That's what I think.
Maybe you will do it
finally let him out.
Maybe he will go and say he will go
I don't know,
get like kids cars
novels, or Sweet Valley High.
Hey, have we talked about this before?
- Matt,
we have this conversation
at any time.
- Tanner's fiance sucks.
- Big bitch.
He said that Tanner can't come here anymore because he didn't want him to hang around Mr. Lance.
- Oh, he said Jeff Lance was a misogynist.
- What are stupid shells.
I don't even know gymnastics.
- No, man.
That's a quarrelsome player.
- Is it misogynistic?
- Who are men? Prejudice against women,
think that they are inferior.
- Does he not know that I'm Jeff Lance?
I like women.
- That's the right guy.
You love women.
You are Jeff Lance.
You don't treat women like an object.
They treat you like an object.
- I know.
I'm actually sensitive.
I have feelings.
I want to be arrested and heard
like a puppy.
- You know what,
I will text Tanner,
tell him
Hey,
tell your fiancee
said Jeff
Misogynism is a very big word
for a little girl.
and send.
- Dude, that's something a misogynist would say.
- Exactly.
- Funny, bro.
- Don't worry about that.
He doesn't do it for everyone.
- Yes, he calls everyone sexy,
racist,
homophobe.
You mentioned it.
- Small thoughts do it all the time.
Most sexy.
Homophobe.
Racist.
Vocal trump card for idiots.
- You are sometimes a bit antisemitic.
- Don't worry, Matt,
Jews will not replace you.
- Hey
Have text from Tanner.
His fiance said he would let us come,
but only for one drink.
And we have to take it in the driveway.
- On the driveway?
This is like in King of the Hill,
Damn Bobby.
That fiance is very annoying.
- Yes, I don't know what you mean by humans.
You know what, fuck.
Let's shoot.
- shot.
Have you ever known about Toby Huss?
Actor from Marshalltown?
Playing Kahn's voices
and Grampaw Hill.
So,
he is ready for that part
from Mr. Miyagi,
and he appeared at the first audition
pissing drunk and doing the most racist,
sounds asian she might be able to,
and brought back for the second audition.
In the second audition,
he came calmly,
losing part.
- So friend, where did you go?
Waterloo?
- Sierra Falls.
I'm with you.
ΓÖ¬ Hatred that you are fighting for for reasons ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Finding your mistakes ΓÖ¬
Γ¬¬¬ Hide behind Γ¬¬¬
¬¬¬ The picture of the perfect lamp Γ¬¬¬
ΓÖ¬ times you are in the corner ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ Dust for ΓÖ¬ fingerprints
ΓΓ¬ From a beautifully painted cage ΓÖ¬
Γ¬¬ Image of your sin ¬¬
¬¬ Give me ig-ig-ignorance ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Give what you can give Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ig-Ig-Ignorance ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Hit them with ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ What should be given ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Alright ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬¬¬ Put on-on on the ΓÖ¬
table ¬¬¬ Pay attention to cunning eyes Γ¬¬
Γ ¬ Serving cold revenge ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ ¬ With a side of revenge ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ Satisfaction does not come easily ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ But to take everything easily ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ With our guests, they are guests ¬¬¬¬
Γ¬ I will only better leave meninggalkan¬
Γ¬ Give me ig-ig-ignorance ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Give what you can give Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ig-Ig-Ignorance ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Hit them with ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ What did they give ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Alright ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ignorance ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Hit them with ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ What did they give ΓÖ¬
- Pro-wrestling is a staple
in each child's life at some point.
There are three
prestigious
Pro-wrestling hall of fame in America.
Cauliflower Alley Club,
WWE,
George Tragos,
Lou Thesz Pro Wrestling Hall of Fame.
held here
in Waterloo, Iowa.
The former culprit is,
Mick Foley,
Edge,
The corner of Kurt,
Iron Sheik,
Jim Ross,
Terry Funk,
Rowdy Rowdy Piper
The Million Dollar Man, Ted Dibiase,
excellence of execution,
Bret "The Hitman" Hart,
and even the governor,
Jesse "The Body" Ventura.
But that one,
who always stuck with me and my friends,
that person,
spend more money
about spilled liquor
from all ends of the world in one year
that you have ever made in a lifetime.
I'm talking about kiss stealing,
wheels, dealing,
Rolex uses,
ride limonene,
jet flying child gun,
child of nature,
Limonene Flair.
Seducing.
- I'm there
because I'm noisy there,
and I see you here only bumming.
I got a ticket for you.
- dude.
When did you do it? become a professional wrestler?
- Since 2010.
You know that.
Dipshit.
- Jesus Christ.
That's amazing.
- Yes, you can get $ 20.
No, you know what,
discount friends and family,
30.
Yes.
- Damn A.
- Drink afterwards?
- Drink afterwards.
- Our son, Frisco.
And the monster,
Hatred.
Wrestling fans,
our winner.
Champion wrestling team tag,
team from,
and Malice.
Γ ¬ I pour stiff drinks ¬¬
ΓΓ¬ At Christmas Γ¬¬¬
ΓΓ¬ Eve ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ You're looking at me ¬¬
Γ ¬¬ As I have to Γ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ Going ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ ¬ You are thinking now when looking at ¬¬¬
ΓÖ¬ The bottle is Γ ¬ ¬
ΓÖ¬ You must know ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ We don't walk sideways ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ I did not try to steal the ¬¬¬¬
show ΓÖ¬ Where do I drink ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ So I drink ΓÖ¬
¬ ¬ Now I'm drunk ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ Bottoms up ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Well I drink ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ So I drink ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Now I'm drunk ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ Bottoms up ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ I was watching a match at the ΓÖ¬
bar ΓÖ¬ Last Monday ΓΓ¬
ΓÖ¬ Night ΓÖ¬
- Guys, how is it?
- Better than Bros.
ΓΓ¬ It's time for Γ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ Going ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ But my friends are here ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ And there are many beers ΓÖ¬
Γ¬¬ And the game post Γ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ So before you get mad at me later ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Just remember that I said so Γ¬
Γ ¬ Well I drink ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ So I drink ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Now I'm drunk ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ Bottoms up ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Well I drink ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ So I drink ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Now I'm drunk ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ Bottoms up ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Well I drink ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ So I drink ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Now I'm drunk ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ Bottoms up ΓÖ¬
¬¬ Well I drink ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ So I drink ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬¬ Same as Hank ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Now I Γ¬
¬ ¬ Drunk, again Γ¬¬¬
- Fire,
a bar that is one block
from Sullivan's brother's center.
On stage now,
Pamela the Punisher is a poet.
The only dominatrix poet to make it.
And, his best friend,
our best friend, Sam the Slave.
- Ode to little piggy,
dirty, evil little piggy.
I will make you mine
so kneel
and whining, you evil pig.
I'm Pamela,
poet Punisher.
And you're just my little pig and everyone will find out.
I am the only dominatrix poet to make it
So kneel down you little evil pig and take it.
- I like Pamela the Punisher.
I like poetry.
Do you have boyfriends?
- Yes.
Fantastic.
I love you Pamela the Poet Poet.
- Rutro.
Where are Scooby and gang?
- Have you solved any mysteries lately?
- No,
not today.
Why?
- Did your mother choose you up from the small league later?
- I'm in the league.
- Does your pastor still persecute you?
- You look like Lance Armstrong without bullets.
- You look like Tom Hanks
and the end of Philadelphia.
- You look like Chaz Bono in the mirror of a nice house.
- Sam.
How are you, how are you doing?
- Good.
Yes, can I have a scotch?
- Yes, put it on me.
- Classy as usual, sir.
Dude, how are people?
Where is Tanner?
- He is with his fiancee, friend.
- Now that's what happened, right.
You are getting older.
You get children.
I have a good wife, I guess.
Or you can be that person drink alone at the bar.
- Yes
- Right.
- Yes, yes.
Apparently now,
He's two knuckles inside
in scrabble games with their finances.
- Scrabble.
Do you not have to know the words for scrabble?
- Yes
You know that person alone playing silly things.
He might sit there bored
make a house and things like that.
- Damn bullshit.
- Idiot.
He will play like this,
them, them,
that, like, and,
a,
and then do D.
And then yes, you know he will get there
and as wrong.
Like he will continue and say ah,
this means
they are right.
They are right.
He will ask.
- His fiance must have the worst now.
- Well, woo.
Look at what he just played.
Actually, Tanner played scrabble
with fiancee
with a group of friends.
He spelled Fount,
which makes it satisfied 24 points.
He is very proud.
Tanner also has a word.
His fiance continues to disturb him in the vocabulary all night long.
Start with Q.
That makes it satisfied score of three letters.
So guess what Tanner said.
I will give you some instructions.
Whistle Muff,
burp box,
sneezing sliz,
womb wheezing,
coughing up the vagina.
That's right.
The word Tanner is Queef.
And if you are still lost,
Google vaginal fart.
Queef gets Tanner 63 total points on words
and give him an edge.
His finances are very upset.
But Ceder Waterfall belongs to him friends are impressed,
and also laughed very hard that Tanner finally joined them.
Just go to show you
everyone comes together
at a campground
more than twat tone.
- Three letter score on the letter Q, good.
- Good.
He puts an extra chromosome to use.
- I will drink my scotch for that.
- I tell you guys,
Jeff Lance is my biological father.
I know that.
- He left with your mother when he was 12 years old,
You realize this.
- That's what I said.
He has Jeff in class when he was 12 years old.
- That means your mother is a child molester.
- Yes, but my biological father is a male.
- Well, that makes sense.
You really like weird dogging standards.
- Patrick Plumly.
He has On The Rocks,
a bar with more than 15 Moscow mules that are different,
eight craft beers on tap,
and even more bottles and cans.
Places like On The Rocks are basically
in Waterloo nightlife.
Let's drink some of the best drinks,
cocktails, beer in all Ceder Valley
all while taking some artwork
from Waterloo vintage.
The Dipshit Twins,
smartest people in the valley.
They receive the highest mark at Iowa State University.
Then, they attended both Columbia and Harvard.
Inspired by their heroes,
Neil Degrasse Tyson
and Carl Sagan.
But like other geniuses,
if you want to throw it away,
invite them to the topic of sex.
This really throws genius.
Einstein could emerge the theory of relativity but ask that Jews are not training
to find the G point in a woman,
and he will be more shaken from Richard Spencer asking for directions at KFC
to the south of Chicago.
- You know,
I think
on the topic of black holes again.
- Here we go.
- We don't know what physical law applies in a black hole.
We just don't.
We apply standard physics laws,
but they cannot apply there.
They can't.
- Again,
standard physics law
can be applied to black holes
if there is attendance
something on this earth
like
gravity.
- Gravity.
Oh, so that's how Google is talking about
when I searched it before.
- Yes,
the same gravity take this beautiful arrow
to black
the hole
gaping bullseye.
Right in the middle.
Don't look.
- Well,
- Jesus Christ.
What in the world is Breaking Is bad biology coming in?
- Matt.
- You nerds talk about
Black hole again?
- Only because we identify as nerds does not mean you can call us nerds.
We can call each other nerds.
You can't call us nerds.
Bookworm.
- Hey, nerdy.
- Hey
- Yes, we are talking about black holes.
- Friends, you guys talk about black holes
more than Robert Pinero.
- Hold it.
He did the comedy thing again.
Because
Robert De Niro,
Bobby when I called him,
she likes black women.
So it's funny.
- Bobby from Niro
likes black.
- the people of Jesus.
Serious
But I will play together.
- Oh.
- So,
let's just say that person is a particle accelerator and take all these mini black holes.
- Yes, you speak my language.
- They go forward and throw us
into the Mandela Effect.
Mandela Effect.
The Mandela effect refers to number of people enlarged
share fake memory,
originally associated with its existence
from various universes.
Are we currently in it?
- Come see.
Answer the question.
- Bernstein.
I think you can be a possibility.
Next question.
- That could be a possibility.
- But
- If only you believed
alternative schedules.
Or I don't know,
maybe something
like an alternative universe.
Bubble bubbles.
- I understand.
Like Rick and Morty, right.
- No, I don't like Rick and Morty.
That's too smart for me.
Make my brain hurt.
- Pickles.
- Pickle dick.
Ow
- It's Rick's pickle.
I have another question for you.
Do you think
because - Yes.
- This black hole is open,
throw us into an alternative universe
in ourselves
that we actually have non-binary people.
People who don't identify
as one sex,
or masculine, or feminine.
That they did not see both.
But they have outside binary,
and outside of CIS's normativity.
I tell you some people does not see gender, but just look at
who they really are as a person.
- Look at people.
I have been to 17 different colleges.
- Dizziness.
Matt,
What are you talking about about men?
- Yes
What are you saying?
- I only say
these people don't see gender.
- You are sick of Dipshitowits one.
- Shut up, Dipshitowits two.
- How can you not see gender?
That
everything you can see when you do it.
Viewing,
hey, hey, hey.
Honestly, honking.
- That's all you can see.
That's all you can see.
- Hey, hey, gender, gender,
gender, gender.
Hey, hey, hey.
- Let's put it,
Hey,
Hey.
- I do both parts.
Hey.
What?
- You will drive us again.
- Sorry.
Sorry.
- What will you do?
Oh yeah, this is seven inches big
dark and red,
sweating,
smells not binary.
- This is me big,
big,
two inches,
give or take
veiny.
Looks almost like--
- Large, large,
two inches?
- Go away.
- I mean,
I think they don't see it that's kind of a boy.
- Well you sometimes You need a microscope,
but you can see it like that.
- You can see it.
I've seen.
Scientific curiosity.
There is nothing strange.
Look, Matt,
let's put it in stupid language.
- Yes, we are the Dipshits.
Sure.
- Nobody denies dick.
- Yes
- Nobody denies dick.
Nobody denies dick.
None.
- You know what.
- What?
- Let's go home.
- Yes
- Get the whiteboard out,
put some Windex fricking on it.
And then we will think about it
for once and forever.
- Yes, Matt.
You are like hole A which is fricking.
Forgive my language, but
we tried
continues to solve
direct milk problem.
Now you make me all twisted.
Now we have to do it
completing fricking
non-binary.
- Computer scientist.
Let's go.
- Some science nerds,
they are not too PC.
indepedent film.
They definitely mean Independent films.
Mandela Effect.
But Independent films
set in Waterloo, Iowa
named Bros.
Oh man, that must be bad.
- Are you running my customer again?
- Come on, they're just going to drink my favorite scotch.
- No problem.
- Tells you what,
I will drink most of the bottles
there anyway.
And they might do it has lots of water.
That doesn't matter.
They're science dorks.
I'm drunk.
I pay more.
- I like alcoholism.
- Hey, hey,
Waterloo Manati meeting just came out?
- Matt, nice to meet you.
- Nice to see you.
- Where is your friend, Tanner?
- He came out with his fiance tonight.
- Yes.
It happens when you get older.
People, they are married.
They have children.
Be happy with your friends.
- Yes, talk about that,
he plays scrabble with him.
See the words he plays.
- Oh yeah.
That's a good placement there on Q.
Three letter score.
63 points.
Very good.
- Yes
I hate drinking alone.
- Eat your bread
with joy and drink your wine with a happy heart,
because God has been approved what you do.
- Very beautiful.
Who is that?
Luke Bryant?
Kanye West?
- This is preacher nine seven.
This is from the Bible.
- Yes
I always try to give musicians too much credit.
- Let me ask you something,
what have you done today?
- Well, it starts.
I have several photos with Jeff Lance in the Library.
I go and see
Pro-wrestling at the Five Sullivan Center.
And go and see Pamela Punisher Poet next door.
It's pretty cool.
- Everything was in the course one Saturday afternoon
in the Cedar Valley.
You know,
the Douist defines grace
not so much
with the words you say,
but with your actions,
your movements,
how you live your life.
You have more wealth several blocks of this city
than most people
anywhere in the world.
Where else,
Other than
maybe Las Vegas or whatever
you can get
a glass of scotch full?
Be happy with your friends,
because they come and go.
You know they will always be children
and the wives out there.
Be happy with them too
because this can also come for you someday.
- Yes
What if not?
- Then you're just . Another old man in a bar.
But look that's fine too.
You need to appreciate your memories,
enjoy your scotch,
and remember Sullivan's five brothers.
They must be happy can return to this city
and enjoy it like you have.
- How can you be so wise?
- I come from Oelwein, Iowa.
Oh hey, I have two tickets to court games.
Starting around 15 minutes.
If you can find someone to go with you, great.
If not, then you just enjoy your night.
- Thank you, friend.
I always appreciate our friendship.
- Be careful.
Finish the scotch.
- Game of the Cedar Valley court.
Midwest from Waterloo professional basketball team.
Actually, Midwest professional basketball league
champion.
- Talking about going bankrupt,
do you have enough money to finish it
pay for your haircut?
- I see, that's cool, that's cool.
It's hard outside here, man.
- You look like Raggedy Anne after the house fire, friend.
- Folk Hair,
I mean one more hair falls from your hair, man,
You will look bankrupt Bruce Willis or whatever.
I just said.
- Jersey Shore refused.
You look like an old Asian.
- Talk about that,
You definitely look like you're out of gas seven golf courses.
- I do, I see you father there.
- Talking about rejection,
like your hairline has refused
your forehead a little.
I don't know what is happening.
- Your hairline looks like fundraising.
I'm sorry.
- You are black.
- You look like an Oreo.
- A broreo.
I like that.
I like that, let's toast for that there.
- Bros for life. - Bro for life.
- So I thought,
and I think I might like the sound
from a few feet a little pitter mumble.
I think maybe we should start a family.
- God.
I like being your wife.
I will be a great mother.
I really want to have it
a little boy or girl with you.
- OK.
I will throw away the condom.
You start taking your temperature and map your days.
And I will triangulate insemination for the best results.
- The way you voice it,
very dirty.
I like it.
- Black Hawk county seat
initially at Cedar Falls.
- Yes, and then some Waterloo residents went and confiscated the documents
and bring them back to Waterloo.
- Wait, is this a story
where do they throw eggs at each other?
- Yes, they call it an egg war.
- Boiled hard.
Just like city councils in these cities.
- or easier,
like a Cedar Valley woman.
- So according to this,
we were conceived at the weekend 11 and 12.
- Hey, it's weekend
I was out of town at my Nana funeral.
- God.
Sorry.
- No problem.
I also messed up other people that weekend.
- C & apos; est la vie.
- Sera, sera.
- Mother, you have to stop hitting people my age.
Stop seducing my male friends.
- You know people think we can
actually a sister.
- You slow down.
You are too much.
- I'm an auntie.
It's our time now.
I will not slow down.
It's time for MILF.
- Dirty.
- Your little friend, Jake, doesn't think so.
- This is Elias,
a good Christian child.
Drink too much overnight.
Actually, he continued all weekend benders.
Now, he is an anoniman alcoholic.
So we call it
AA Elias.
- Damn this guy.
Why don't they fix this, friend?
Who cares.
- Hey, Jorge.
- What do you want, friend?
- You know I really are concerned about you humans.
I really care about your health.
Hwy don't look at this.
Really can help you.
- Do you think?
- Yes man.
That helps me.
- whatever dude.
Go dude, I drink.
- Okay, just think about it, friend.
- Yes, whatever.
Go fuck yourself.
Damn, AA was successful.
Good.
- I like you two in Oz.
- What's up?
- Hey, what's with Jorge?
What's wrong, bro?
Marcel, can I get another run?
Thank you.
- This time, man?
- Yes
You have the same too.
- I'm in mourning.
- Yes, I guess I'm also grieving.
- Why, Anthony Bourdain too?
Did you hear about that bullshit too?
- No, Tanner.
He has a fiancee.
Can't hang out with me.
- He found someone who is tighter than you, huh.
- Yes, I think on the one hand.
- On the one hand?
Very?
- Yes
Who pushed the light?
- That's milk weed,
Tyler that tool.
- O Lord Jesus.
Is the mountain dew diet too spicy?
- For milk weeds
bastard, maybe.
- Oh yeah.
Extra cheese is a good call.
That's two flusher, baby.
Pouring one for you dead homies there?
You both have grinders.
That's how you meet.
That's amazing.
Good for you.
You are a beautiful couple.
I like melting pot this kind of situation happens here.
- Hey, at least I understand swiped right, bastard.
Hey, what's with the jacket?
Are you worried Jews replace you?
- You can't replace me.
I'm like
if Adolph Hitler can design someone perfectly.
A genetically modified member of the boy band basically.
- Yes, Richard Spencer Five.
I've heard of them.
- You are like my uncle.
You go south of the border.
You have a good Hispanic wife.
You are like that guy
from a Modern Family.
That's amazing.
- You are adorable.
- That's like your mother said.
He thinks I'm very cute.
He put me in him big strong Mexican arm,
like a big bunch of fruit.
Just picked me up.
- Hey,
where is your friend posted?
Tyler?
- Draw double on the golf course, man.
Golf pro.
Make good money.
He has children on the road.
He fucks girls, not like you.
- Putting.
Short game.
Well, half of the game actually is.
You master this, and
I think I saw a little green jacket in your future.
But,
but you have to keep an eye on the ball
then skipped
to the hole.
Through that hole.
But,
You must focus.
Friend.
Focus.
- Hey, I think it's baby Ruth on Caddyshack.
- Yes, but all they have is crazy people.
- Hey, there's no Caddyshack reference anymore.
- But man, orange ball.
Hey Wayne, this is a fancy joint.
Tell him you're a Jew.
- There is no Caddyshack reference anymore.
There is no Caddyshack reference anymore.
I'm very serious.
- Oh dear.
This is a big one.
- Okay, don't count that one.
It's disturbed.
- The whole world needs trench diggers too.
- What do I say about caddyshack references?
- What's the problem?
I just want to bring you a present.
- No
more
Reference to caddyshack.
- Hey, it's from Caddyshack two.
- Yes, it's from Caddyshack two, bra.
- Damn it.
The last time I saw you,
night at Cedar Falls with Heather.
- But the girl spoke about how small my cock is.
Like you are six feet four,
everything looks small
compared to that.
Come on.
- You've noticed when he's angry,
is he like William Defoe?
- Oh man, this is like
kind of like seeing my stepfather.
This is crazy.
Like
someone who was shot by Jake Taylor damn
from Major League on Platoon,
You know what I'm talking about.
- Yes man.
God.
Is he being saved on Boondock Saints?
- Yes
Born on July 4th.
- You two peas.
What are you, damn
shake the sword sometimes.
- That's not a bad idea?
- Yes man.
Hey, you have to have someone from the film
talk nonsense about your cock,
Who is it?
- Geez, maybe Hannibal Lector, friend.
He will be like that
very detailed about that,
and then like the snack fucking with some fava beans.
How about you?
- Strangely,
Cruella de Vil.
- 101 Dalmatians.
- Yes
Yes, he talked about that,
he still sees beauty in it.
He just has to find 100 more
and focus on a fashionable jacket.
- Nice little suit.
- Yes, who doesn't want to use thick-skinned jacket?
- I will look good in a dick coat.
- The jacket is tighter than the skin of the dick.
- Of course.
- So,
fuck.
Do you want to go to Lava Lounge?
I'll buy you Scotch.
$ 12,
kind of good.
- Trailer Park Boys, good.
- Good.
- Well, it looks like I'm Julien this one,
because I took my drink with me.
- It's about fucking time.
- Have a good one.
Adios amigo.
- Yes, fuck yourself.
- No, C3-PO has silver legs.
- Mandela effect.
- No, what?
No, no, no, no, no.
C3-PO is gold
and Han does Run Castle
in 12 parsecs.
Duh.
- Pretty sure it's 14.
- He told Chewy
that he resigned in Solo.
- Either way,
it's still impressive.
- So,
are Rey Han and Leia's children?
- How come?
Will Luke and Leia not feel that?
I mean, this jedi is not real.
Leia can Mary Poppins through a vacuum,
but he can't track his children.
- It can't be that way Rey is their child.
Han and Leia,
no, it's impossible.
No.
- Jedi is an annoying parent.
- According to you
that
at like other bars in this city,
there is a girl talking about Star Trek
like we talked about Star Wars.
- Not possible.
- Yes, Star Trek is stupid.
- You're right.
- You can have your Captain Pikard.
You can have your Captain Kirk,
but I'm after that Spock.
There is a reason life long and prosperous.
I smile at Vulcan's face.
- I understand that.
But I want Mr. Chekov because I want to make it the first.
You know they are virgins.
I want to take it bravely
where no human has gone before.
- Girl.
- You know you can do a little.
- Only you are a girl.
- I told you,
that's what should have happened.
- Cheerful.
- You know, I have to say,
Rent so far is the biggest musical
been created.
He has a heart.
This is visceral.
And that only moves you in all ways.
And also, it really touched home
with all my gay friends and what they must bear.
- Les Miserable is the greatest musical of all time.
It explores the human soul,
struggle.
They want to be part of a higher power,
and a gift of humanity.
- Cats are the best.
I just like it.
Cute little cats roam.
And they don't make me sneeze like a real cat.
- The Music Man,
light musicals
set in Iowa.
That saw the best production at Cedar Falls Community Theater
on.
The Waterloo Community Playhouse
also has extraordinary production.
- You are all wrong.
I'm not trying to be a jerk, but,
a bad choice.
Greese 2 is
very better than everything you mentioned.
You can roll your eyes,
but it's actually like that.
You only have to visit it again.
The Music Man?
I do not mean disrespect,
I am only,
it's like,
it's a children's game for grandparents.
That makes Iowans
looks like
fools who can't find fraud
half the cornfield.
It's no use.
Cats.
I don't have enough scotch for Cats.
Rent humans.
Rent & apos; s insufferable.
That's just, like I understand.
As I understand the struggle.
Sympathize fully with the gay community
in New York City during AIDS
and persecution,
live in a strange, bad apartment.
But really all that is possible brotherhood of white students
to slaughter more Karaoke songs.
I can't, I can't.
Cats?
Les Eg.
I mean, I don't hate it.
I like Anne Hathaway in the film.
This is very good.
But Jean Valjean
no
and there will never be
Cool Rider.
In Greese 2, Michael
come to America with a dream.
He makes money writing essays for
disadvantaged people at school.
And he saves money and he built a motorcycle
from the beginning.
Cool drivers are needed.
He built it from the beginning.
He changed these parts
and he built it into something stronger,
faster,
and very beautiful.
I don't know what else you want.
This is the American dream in the form of music.
Michelle Phieffer needs hell on wheels
and for God's sake,
Michael is a hot bird.
This also has the best bowling scene
in cinematic history.
That's much better than the stale
karaoke film Gooey Beatles
in the universe.
- Seriously, Harris.
Is that the best you can produce?
- Help me,
please, I prefer Harold.
- I prefer Harris.
- OK.
- Some reasons why Greese 2 is dirt.
First of all,
Michelle Phieffer sounds like
he has a dead cat stuck in his throat.
The song is terrible.
- But he persisted.
- That is easily the worst film
he ever entered.
Second, there is a production in progress now called 13.
These children are in middle school
and they use something better
from the age of 30 this year can.
Last,
these four musicals
is on stage,
being on Broadway.
Greese 2 is only in theaters
and has never won an award.
- Well,
better is a local theater.
They chose to do Greese
not wrong.
If they will get their heads
from their ass,
they will choose the right one,
they will find cool drivers and Harold will be obliged.
- So what do you drink there?
- Miss young, I don't drink whatever.
I experienced this
one malt scotch.
- You know,
every time you drink Scotch,
it makes me very agile.
- Well I guess that
a different experience for everyone.
- What are you doing later?
- Young woman,
I have to tell you that I wear my chastity ring.
- Why are you wearing a purity ring?
- Because
purity rings are very cool.
- Harold's cousin.
Do you doubt
the coolness of my purity ring?
- Good if your ears are wolf ears is an indication,
yes, right.
I have decided that the ring of purity no more.
- Then they're not longer hips for Oliver.
Young women may be interested.
- Do you want to experience my place or you later?
- Oh, Oliver doesn't want to wait that long.
How about
come out back behind the trash?
- Get rid of fucking shit?
Yes.
- Oliver,
please.
- Oh, Harold's cousin,
I think you are right.
What if we go back to my place
and we experienced a bottle of single malt scotch
and I will show you my big one collection of vinyl.
- OK.
- My work here is finished.
- Thank you, Harold's cousin.
Thank you.
- Did he say damn garbage?
- I believe they say damn garbage.
Have you ever dumped messy garbage?
- I have never had garbage,
but I have a handjob behind the Frozen Delicious one time.
- Sounds like you.
- You are how I feel The tractor's shot.
Just like,
actually that person is there
on TV.
He seems like the man who might put himself
in the film itself.
- Yes, many films on the same subject.
- Always at the same bar,
in the same location,
and it's always the same gay gay joke.
- Constantly.
Because it's the only one This person feels funny
is a dick joke after life from the tour and jump bar.
- Drink anything except scotch.
Pretty sure it only flows through his veins and he just likes
kissing scotch straight.
- Burned all the time.
You never know when he gets applause.
- I mean, I'm sure he has some good medicine for that.
But three films.
Fuck.
Kevin Smith won't even make a third employee.
- Of course not.
- Strip club,
pornography shop,
come on Boss.
There must be something else out there.
- What would you suggest I do?
- Christian bookstore.
- Boss.
This is the Boss.
He has a strip club
and adult bookstores in the city.
This former boss.
The Adult Shop Mop.
- Okay, idea about
in business is staying in business.
You realize that, right.
Hey, you're a good kid.
Everyone likes you, Elias.
You know they call you AA Elias now
the cause of that weekend.
But it's okay.
AA might be good.
Anonymous alcoholics work for some people
and it looks like
works well for you.
And that's good.
Let me ask you something.
Imagine that there is a good Christian.
He goes to church
every Wednesday and Sunday.
Go to Bible study,
great guy,
very loyal.
He drives on the road one day on his way to a Bible study,
soup kitchen,
what ever.
He got tightness in his chest.
Pain in his arm.
Realizing he had a heart attack,
draw to the first place
he can find
to seek help.
He died on the business floor.
Say that
my adult bookstore
or one of my strip clubs.
The news will be read
77-year-old man died of a heart attack
10:00 am
in adult book stores or strip clubs.
You will automatically think this person is bad.
Let's go to the other side.
Imagine there is a terrible man.
A man who went to me strip club all the time.
He is in my adult bookstore,
complete porn hound.
Full reprobate.
A drunk person.
Bitches are prostitutes.
He drove on the road one day.
Tension on his chest.
Pain in his arm.
Know he will get a heart attack.
Attracting to the very place the first place he can find
to seek help,
and that is the church.
The news will be read
77-year-old man
died of a heart attack at 10:00 am
on Wednesday morning
in the church.
You will automatically think he is good.
- Well,
at least I tried.
- Always remember this,
an extraordinary gift written by an atheist who was saved.
So don't ever stop trying.
You're a good man.
- Thank you boss.
See you later.
- Goodbye.
- Praise.
The last time I saw a donkey like that,
it brings our master and savior.
- Are you serious objectifying him now?
- No, I don't underestimate it.
I only saw his buttocks.
What's wrong with you?
concocting words and poop.
I tried to
get my cock wet.
Talk to you later.
However,
I feel you can become Columbine and I decided to shoot a group of children in you.
Hmm?
You know the mid 90s,
You are a pawn.
I just started slamming the shit.
Maybe you attract Fonz
and only bang til jukebox
Incubus plays,
whatever you do.
Kati Perry?
Taylor Swift?
I don't know how old are we?
Can you drink?
Do you need drinks?
- Hey, boss.
- Matthew.
- How are you?
- Kevin, get
bro this is drinking to me.
So scotch?
- Certainly.
Must be Scotch.
- I have this Highland Park viking scotch.
Kevin suggested it.
- Viking honor.
Good for us Norwegians.
- Yes, but you know what is not good for us.
What is this There are AA flyers here?
AA Elias here?
- Yes, he is here.
- I think I saw that traces of the snail heading.
- Oh you heard about that weekend, huh?
- Yes
Bender to remember.
- Anonymous alcoholics
according to people like him.
It was a great weekend for him.
I mean Jesus,
parents come to him on Sunday night.
His heart is inflamed.
He got the worst case chlamydia or gonorrhea.
That kid can't handle weekend liker.
That's really,
I heard it was an epic weekend.
I heard that was very fun.
- I saw him in earlier that week.
He shows up with a bottle of scotch ready to roll.
- Oh yes, he is a ball.
But yes, I think anonymous alcoholics
is the correct position for him.
I think that
a good place for him.
- Hey,
coasters?
- I didn't see anything.
Kevin, do you have a coaster?
- We all come out.
- AA works.
- OK.
- Do you need someone to sign a loan for you?
I don't know where you are in your life.
Do you want to see how much my penis is can you enter your mouth?
I think you can almost get everything.
You look like you like really
can only do attitude,
You know what I mean.
You are a warrior.
You are a survivor.
- Are you a letter?
- I have been told that I was D before.
I see.
- Like in a douchebag?
- Like a dick.
I don't know if it's big one, but it's a beautiful chicken.
It's fun to see.
- Anyway.
Because you are a letter,
I will need you for a way out.
- Oh, so funny.
I will need to see you M on that breast.
- I'm actually
one of your business today.
- Thank you for your support.
- Yes
- That's classic.
Okay, where are you?
- Mini cinemas.
- Do you wash your hands
before you shake my hand there?
- Damn.
- It's okay, it's okay.
- So it's weird.
I went there
and I didn't see the Porn Peddler Pete.
- Oh, he doesn't work for me anymore.
- What happened?
- Well he's pirated pornography.
I can't stand it.
I mean when you sell pornography,
You have to pay taxes,
rights,
all these different costs.
He doesn't do that.
That's not true.
People spend a lot of time and money make pornography.
They must be paid living wages for things like that.
Yes, so he hijacked pornography
entire city.
And I know about that
and I have to let me go.
Damaging his heart.
He likes the job.
- He really likes the job.
Man, all this time,
everyone thinks you are morally bankrupt.
I think we are in a recession.
- Ironic not.
- Now you say it,
now I remember something about that.
I heard his house was raided.
Like the incoming police,
Swat team entered
and they found some items in the basement.
- I didn't hear about this.
What?
- He has a secret file.
I mean it's almost like Donnie Darko
and you realize Patrick Swayze
have like
prison kiddie porn there.
Not like that.
That is an insignificant thing.
= Porn Raider.
- What is a raider?
I have never heard of Raider porn.
What is porn Raider?
- That's when white supremacy
have hairy parties
and they hit each other
and record it.
- But wait a minute.
How many animals in the animal kingdom
actually white?
- Like a snow leopard.
- You have a dove.
Like an albino squirrel maybe.
- Human gods, polar bears.
- Polar bear.
Yes, polar bear.
- You know when white supremacy
everything is in a missionary position.
So it will be very boring.
- But wait a minute,
if the brown bear enters
it's just a kind of throw all loose.
- Yes
They don't let this person enter.
Come on.
- Imagine he entered,
Do you mind if I dance with your date?
- Oh come on,
they will worry about it.
They will produce a kind of skunk baby
in their minds.
Come on, man.
That won't happen.
- Imagine a neo-Nazi
mid stroke in the middle of raider porn
and black bears enter.
God, adult shop mop
and I am soft.
- I mean handwork
even fair,
I watched you, you watch me.
I will
eat ass,
but it will be like that
eat at Benny Hannas from what it seems.
- Seriously?
- Yes
To be serious, oh big time.
- This is the best for you Can you do to pick up a girl?
- I mean,
the next one pulls out the wallet
or get you on one of me Daddy's Nissan or whatever.
I don't know
what are you currently,
APR is now like you or what is yours
as far as rent goes or anything,
but I can buy you a car.
I can get money from you.
Some fake titties, or something.
Whatever you want,
I'll do it for you.
- Dude, I'm too good for you.
- There is only one way to find out.
And often,
like a big trend now
I have seen it online for women likes portable men.
I can be that pesky boyfriend that all your friends are joking.
And you know, really,
when you go home,
I am--
- Dude, I've been there, done that, so.
- You haven't done this but it's difficult.
- Porn Raider.
There is actually a video raider.
That's not a joke?
- There are no flowers.
I am very serious.
- Why does he have a pornography raid in his basement?
- I don't know humans.
He's like a weirdo, sick _ A little obsession there.
And he continues to do it.
- And the police
come for that.
God.
- They did it.
- God.
I bet good little methodist mother
Lost when he saw the police appear
to get the raider porn collection.
- He always likes
skating weird figure,
but maybe because it's like
usually white little girls.
- Well he's interesting,
he is an attractive duck.
- Always floating in the air,
maybe like a bird.
- Strange child, weird kid.
But,
I can forgive all that.
But you don't hijack pornography
because people are not paid proper taxes, fees and residues
that they are entitled.
But porn raider,
it's a bridge that is too far away.
- God.
Look at this garbage.
Look at him.
- Oh, God.
That's worse than
has a porn raider being a standing comedian.
- I heard that porn is actually Pete
said that he paid attention to that
to build a standing comedy action.
- So it's hers
excuse me is I have a raider porn collection to--
- Works a little.
I think I prefer to be a porn dog
rather than being a standing comedian.
That's like the lowest of the low.
- God, can you imagine what will be like
if we have to go around
Community--
- You have to go door to door and tell everyone that he is a standup.
I'm sorry.
I'm Pete, I live in--
- I live in your community.
- God.
What makes the Methodist more upset?
The fact that he is
peddling porn and hijacking it throughout the city
or will he become a standing comedian?
- Dude, I don't know.
That is there.
God.
- Speaking, yes, Jesus,
talking about devils,
see the bag of dirt.
God.
- God.
How embarrassing it is.
- Look,
I'm sure his parents are very proud.
God.
- Oh yes, sure.
Those people just drive like that
red mustang
with convertibles on canvas.
Not even V8, V6.
Automatic.
- That's V8.
I hope I never
as low as that I have to do something like that
to gather attention.
- Oh friend.
I prefer to suck dick from behind in the alley
make a decent wage from it
rather than having to speak anything
words become microphones.
- Matt, please, let's make an appointment that we never had to do standup comedy.
- Yes
- Very fast, bathroom, three minutes.
- I don't want to.
- Behind this jukebox?
We fucking pulled this thing out.
- I really don't want to.
- It's okay.
I will see you do a number of things.
- It does have a double bro than I have you.
- It might feel the same.
You have a little
Nubby Nubby in each hand.
Small corn holder.
If that's what you want,
I will arrange it.
I know them.
- They don't like you.
- Nothing is right, but I mean.
- Then why are you here?
If nobody likes you, then why are you here?
Why don't you leave?
Return to Douche land?
- I will do that.
If you change your mind,
I'm going to come here. - I do not want.
- It's okay.
You might. - So, go away.
- I have that thing
behind your mind.
You will think about it.
- No. - Think about that.
- Damn it.
- God.
I can't get a vagina in this place.
I might as well go damn king and queen.
- Bung Jesus Christ,
You validated the sliz.
- What does that mean?
Objectifying?
You sound like one of those girls.
- You know,
loose morality,
a little loose action.
That's what I meant.
- Yes, then vilify me.
This is my goal all night to do that.
Trying to find some shells, friend.
A small slam shell.
Clam digger.
Whatever I can do to dampen some duff.
- I didn't realize it You are a shoreman yourself.
Nectar Wookie,
a lifeless idiot
the whole existence
consists of following around bands like Base Nectar.
When they don't sell stacked drugs,
vegetable burritos and grilled cheese,
they often swipe drinks and trying to borrow literally everything at a music festival.
A Wookie Nectar is a hipster natural enemy,
kind of like in Twilight
with vampires and werewolves.
Hey, Kristen Steward is a Jew.
Why else can he with a 100-year-old man
with a good German car?
- I don't mean to cause an alarm,
but does my nostril fool me,
we have a wookie nectar
in our midst.
- Oh, sorry.
That's me
I haven't,
I haven't bathed in a few weeks, so.
- Also, Bonoroo has a bathroom in a few weeks.
- No, that,
it's actually next week,
I am very sure.
Yes.
- I don't have marijuana.
The drink is not yours.
Bonoroo like that.
- Oh well.
- Yes, Phish is about to take the stage man.
You better go.
- Guess what,
guess what,
Base Nectar
not in the jukebox.
What if you are dubstep
get away from the situation
You're a fucking wookie.
- Jesus, okay.
I'm sorry.
- Stay out of Gong Fu, okay.
- By the way,
do you have mushrooms?
- Get out of here.
We have nothing.
- Damn Mark Walberg on Rock Star.
- It's not a bad film, honest.
- Hey, did you see what happened to my drink?
- Sorry friend.
Damn Woff took it.
- Sorry friend.
- Thank you for finding out, friend.
Bartender, bring this brooch to me.
- So Bros, this is the last call.
What do you think?
- Scotch.
- Scotch?
- Scotch.
- It's better not to be the Actor.
- All right, bro,
This is Singleton,
the Glenlive 12 years,
single malt.
You know about that, Harold.
- Hey, not Waiter, we're fine.
- We will pour it neatly.
- Do you know what that means?
- No.
- Harold.
- Yes?
- You pour it very fast.
That's a neat man.
Neato.
- What will I do now
is I will put a few drops of water
in each.
This changes molecular density.
This opens it.
- Like a bouquet.
- Exactly.
- Like a woman's feet.
- With the best water
in the valley.
Actually in the world.
- Yes.
- The best hangover medicine
there.
Water.
- I hope we have some notes from Roy Orbesen.
Is that how you throw away your scotch?
- Yes, is there another way?
- God, you still do it
damn Big League Chew?
- Damn A right man,
because I am a professional.
- We should give him Actors.
- What are the plans for the next attack?
Because this is very fun and all, but--
- I have Lyft.
- Who?
- Someone named Ling.
- No.
No no no no.
Trust me.
I got pepper sprayed by the broad one.
No.
- I'm from Brooklyn, you bastard.
- Wait wait,
is there Brooklyn in China?
- I sprayed it with my pepper.
- Oh, I thought I heard that.
Did he join AA Elias after that?
- Oh shit, he did it.
- OK.
- Oh yeah.
- Yes I will realize if I have to hit this person.
- I just said,
if I have my cock inside you,
will make you good positive changes in life.
- my Lord.
Listen, I'll continue
Uber now.
I know I won't get it in Uber Jews.
- Oh, Uber Jew.
Well
- Uber Jew?
- Yes - Yes
- Looks like a little
antisemitic and maybe a little bland.
- God.
It's not like I'm making love is called in shuttler sheeny.
Damn kike the dude cart.
Oh god.
- I'm on the highway hieve long ago.
- Hey,
- I won't say I'm gay.
But I must have finished some gay is unlucky, man.
- Yes you have.
- Yes
- We are fully aware.
- You haven't?
No?
- No.
- Harold never
taking part in homosexuality.
- You will tell me with that jacket,
and the beard you have never done anything gay?
- Maybe watching the WNBA.
- I'll tell you,
if you get more related
with your male side,
You may have,
I don't know,
more luck to get a woman.
- Actually I prefer the WNBA.
This is more of a team sport.
- Your only reason is like watching a WNBA
because there are many women
has an apple belonging to Adam.
- I really appreciate their talent.
- God, will you do it
if they do it?
- No, man.
I'm like an ancient Roman soldier.
That's the only reason why me and my other male friends
has been tied to the way we have.
I will not say that anything sexual about it.
More about
become brothers,
get closer than you can ever.
A person's life in your hands,
You want to really trust someone,
that jerk.
You know what I mean.
You really learned a lot about someone.
- Achilles and Hector, you don't.
- No, no.
I will not die because of the back of my ankle
got a tweak.
You know what I mean.
No, me
like Brad Pitt,
but it's more like Brad Pitt on Snatch.
You know what I mean.
- Do you like dykes?
- Yes
Do I like dykes?
Or anchored?
- Guys.
Do you like men?
- Eh, I wouldn't say I like them,
but if you have never done it a jerk,
you haven't lived.
Strength of textiles owned by a man
much better than women.
- Call it.
- It's like getting a fucking handjob from the hands of the farm, you know what I mean.
Only good parents Middle west hand shocks.
You know what I'm talking about.
In fact,
Let me show you.
From what I learned,
I don't know,
are among my fellow men,
I will teach the woman there
one or two things
he was never seen.
I will make him suck my cock.
- him?
- Yes
- him? - Yes
Bid the angel there.
- him?
- Yes, let me,
let me show you guys, okay.
I, this will be
Trojan Fighters
and it's my young bodyguard.
- This is the moment where Harold
continue to be confused how we are friends.
- Let me give you advice.
- I do not recommend this.
- I would not recommend this.
- Why?
She's too easy.
Too easy to kill?
Is this like hunting a wounded deer?
It's okay.
That's all I'm looking for,
You know what I mean.
- I think Tyler needs a challenge.
- I will accept roadkill.
Yes, of course.
- OK.
- How about sufficient funds
to go malt scotch
to appreciate this moment.
- You keep my chair warm.
I will make my cock wet.
When I return,
you can help eliminate it
and tell me how great we are.
- He is always rude.
I am not shy,
but I can see it appreciates crude oil.
- How are you girl?
Can you drink?
- Yes
Like the Red Bulls here, baby.
- Sure, I like to destroy Red Bull vodka with you all night long
and then you can make love to me doggie style
as we watch the new season from Blue Mountain State.
Do you like Nickleback as much as I do?
- Yes.
- Yes - Gosh, yeah.
- I love fucking tools.
Yes.
- Pull my hair.
- You pull my baby's tool.
- God.
Get this little tool here.
- Why do you call it small?
- Damn, can I get a pair of red vodka bulls on him?
- Wow, seriously?
- Uh uh.
- Who do you think you are?
Do you think I'm just some small warehouse tool
You can do anything What do you want?
God, you like that typical Cedar Falls WASP
who might have just graduated from high school
on the fact that father has a car dealer.
How many beginner cheerleaders
do you have your dirty little fingers
after the lacrosse game?
Huh?
Return home.
Yes, I can kiss them from here.
Return home,
Clean Ax body spray
and wait for your next time
sign you
for bachelor date nights
at your country's failed country club.
- Wow.
You failed.
Guess who played the piccolo their first year.
Peace.
- Whatever.
Small Penis.
- This is bigger than yours.
- I can't even see it through your jeans.
Get out of here.
- That's because they are dark.
- Oh, what gave Charlie Brown?
- Fuck you.
I attack.
- him?
With him?
- him?
- Yes, I attacked him.
What happened to me?
- Fuck this.
- Like a pirate - I think it's Kirk tonight.
- Guys.
I call the nuclear option.
- No.
Not men who have more women from anyone in Cedar Valley.
- Yes.
Sultan sliz himself.
- I admire the man's sexual prowess.
- and send.
- He is cursed. - Oh Boy.
- Sir, you have a message.
- Tyler,
Matt,
Harold.
- Mr. Lance.
Now maybe a very good time
for you to get horny.
- This is my secret, Matt.
I am always aroused.
- Mr. Lance. - So cool.
- He called me Harold.
- God.
Are you Jeff Lance?
- You're right.
Bros, Jeff Lance.
- So what did you do after this?
- Go to Cornstalk on Spicoli.
- Oh really.
- I heard Carolina Spine playing.
- Caroline
Spine.
- Caroline
Spine. - Do it right.
- I'm sorry.
- You know that song about Waterloo, right.
- Yes, called Ny. Sullivan.
- Okay, really like Sullivan's brothers and sisters all about jazz.
Alright alright.
- So, oh my god, right,
we have to go.
- Yes, I have to go.
- Let's do it.
- Carolina Spine.
- Okay, serious friends,
get on the damn horn.
We need a driver.
We must bring down humans.
Caroline's Spine.
- OK I understand.
- Look at this, initiative,
I like it.
Tyler the tool.
Does it say fucking Grinder?
- Yes dude,
trying to get my ass hole licked.
- Can't meet woman with tongue strength
what I need.
- Tyler,
cool it with butt stuff, bro.
I did it.
- Do you have a ride?
- I am a miracle worker.
- It's impossible for Lyft.
- My eyes deceived me.
- There are Asian women,
I climbed the big wall like me Mongolian.
Genghis Khan on the bitch.
- This,
This is as poetic as Silvia Plath.
This.
- Silvia Plath?
- That's for sure.
- The girl who wrote Frankenstein?
- Harold's eyes don't cheat him.
- God.
They should send a poet.
- They do it.
- Like Robert Frost?
- It's live gold.
- The Uber Jew,
Jewish Uber drivers who is very Jewish,
then he
Uber Jew,
the biggest uber driver ever.
Damn love is hebe.
Hey, him
who found loyal friends find treasure.
That's a Jewish saying.
- Hey,
Brooch gets room for one more?
- Tanner!
- Hey
- Turtles Reunion tour?
- You have to sit in the back.
- You have to sit bitch.
- OK.
- God.
There isn't yet
anyone
happy to see a Jew
because I don't know,
the students at the first Easter.
- Start with it soon, huh.
- Wait, so why are you back here again?
- Well, I moved back.
Cost of living in
Chicago is a little too high for me.
- Are you really in Chicago?
Are you at Logan Square?
- I can't believe we met. - Or is it more like Evanston?
- Well Schaumburg actually.
- I'm Harold.
No, we don't have fun yet.
- Yes, I will say
I will remember that beard.
- Is this reminiscent of mahogany and ash?
- No.
- Dude, the fucking hat hurts.
I have to get me one of them
with gold on it.
And not the star,
maybe using something like a knife
or like or something.
- I think it will be a little more.
You know I have to say,
I'm a little surprised.
- Oh.
- To see
a hipster,
a tool,
and all brooches in the same car.
I'm a little proud of you.
me.
- Does it break your heart
that we ride sharing now?
- Type makes you wonder why Israel and Palestine cannot get along.
- You know, there's actually more to it.
- I know.
- And like that crystal
knocked on all closing crap you guys come together.
I know a damn scam when you try to get it
glass window insurance money.
My father sold it.
I know that he--
- Hey Tyler,
Crystal knock.
- Who is there?
- Work inside.
- And six million fewer Jews.
- You haven't changed one bit.
- Why are you back.
You are with bubby you say.
And you will work for your uncle.
- Well,
it finally didn't work.
- Is it bubby or booby?
- I'm not as good as the money as I thought.
- That's your first one I will never admit that joke.
- So you don't have enough to make six numbers?
- We will not talk about it.
- They can't even make six inches.
- What are you doing?
Just rub the nick together to make our money or what?
- Oh, I miss you guys.
I really am.
- I don't believe we found you in the app.
That is the magic of Christmas.
Oh sorry, the miracle of Hanukkah.
- Yes.
- Does Hanukkah have miracles?
- You can say Christmas.
I am not offended.
- I don't want to offend.
I just want to be historically accurate.
- We are not offended You killed Christ.
- You know I really like riding you.
You gave us Scotch roads.
- Scotch road.
- Jesus Christ,
Glen Levit.
- At least it's a single malt.
- Yes
- What, are they from Cutty Sark or what?
- Hey, you never know when someone
will make you stiff.
I can't reach the top shelf.
- You're like fucking Pauly
drink.
- Even the middle shelf.
- Like at that time Piccolo's s doers.
Jesus
- I think they don't have Doers.
I think they have
like the Lauder.
- Harold had water that night.
- Yes
- What's your middle name?
- What is your date of birth?
- Oh my God,
I don't have time for this, okay.
I work two jobs,
have children.
I get a crow's foot.
Okay, I just want to go to a concert.
- Hmm, okay come in.
- Sounds good to me.
- He looks pretty good for 46.
- 105.7 KOKZ,
Hit the classic Iowa.
My name is Craig Lowey.
You know where you have to be tonight.
You must be at Spicoli in Waterloo
because it's fantastic Band will come to town.
Jimmy Newquist and Caroline & apos; s Spine will be in town.
I know these people for a long time.
They have the hit song,
Sullivan, among others.
We definitely want you to come out and support
not only Spicoli,
but Jimmy Newquist and Caroline's Spine.
If you have never seen them live,
You must miss.
And we want you to experience
Caroline's Spine tonight,
Spicoli is at Waterloo.
Take a look.
- Erin McCool.
My life has changed.
How are you?
- Cool guy.
- I prefer to shake hands.
- Hi friend, this is James Patrick
on Rock 108.
Make sure you arrive at Spicoli tonight
cause only for one night,
Jimmy Newquist,
Caroline's Spine
shake the hell of Spicoli.
So make sure you are there tonight.
- Harry, how are you?
- It's better if you call me Harold.
- I always forget.
- I prefer that.
- Well Harold, I understand something special for you.
Here's something. You actually prefer
more than our water choice.
- or your boss?
- Or Actor.
Okay, will Harold approve this?
- Harold will approve.
- I will pour you.
- Better than Doers.
- That's it, Harold.
- You can do it without ice, but.
- Hey, welcome back to the show on press roll with sports men.
I'm Gary Rime
along with my producer in the studio
and cohost to the program,
Chris Gobinacker.
We love to call him
sports stud.
Hi sports buttons,
I got a memo here.
Caroline's Spine
played at Waterloo on Spicoli on University Avenue tonight.
Hey there's no Caroline Spine is it a big American skater?
- You're close, Sports Guy.
Caroline Zont,
and he is a big American skater it is three times the champion skater.
- Cool.
Hey Sports Stud,
you know there is
twice the champion is right here from Waterloo,
the kings of the Cedar Valley palace,
our small league basketball team.
- You're really Sports Guy,
back to the Midwest league basketball champions.
- Not to mention your own champion
on ice,
in their shoes,
Waterloo Blackhawks Hockey Team
Anderson Cup Champion.
- This is an impressive item.
- Oh dear.
I like these teams.
- What happens to boys?
- What's wrong?
- Drink you pig.
- Yes
- It's a good night.
Wow man, the penis is good.
You especially.
Damn it.
- Dude,
there are no gay men.
- What do you mean?
No, there's nothing gay about that.
It's just that I'm applauding someone else's gift.
God clearly blessed this young man.
- You bought a drink, right?
- I'll put it on your tab.
Easy boys.
- See you later.
- This is the song introducing me to you.
¬ ¬ It is not difficult to reach back to the day Γ¬¬¬
ΓΓ¬ Under the Iowa sun ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Run to the Waterloo tower ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ ¬ Looking for Sullivan Trains to come ¬¬
ΓΓ¬ And the five sons will run to ΓÖ¬ above
ΓÖ¬ And salute him when he goes Γ¬¬¬
ΓÖ¬ First we wave hello ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ Then we wave goodbye ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ Goodbye ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ It is not difficult to do it reach back to the days Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ After the attack on Pearl ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Overnight my friends turned into men lakiÖ¬
Γ ¬ ¬ Running out of time for games and girls ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ And Sullivan's children are not ignored ΓÖ¬
¬ Uncle Sam calls each by the name ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ The next day they were left on the mystery train .Ö¬
ΓΓ¬ Say goodbye, goodbye, Mrs. Sullivan ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ And don't cry, cry, cry, cry, cry Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ We are sorry to tell you ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ The Navy has taken your son away Γ¬¬¬
ΓΓ¬ All five, five, five, five Γ €
¬ ¬ So put your blue star in the window Γ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ Your window ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ It is not difficult to reach back to his smile ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ When he received a letter Γ¬¬¬
ΓÖ¬ And their letters are heard generally Γ € the same
Said Said if they cannot go home pulangÖ¬
Γ¬¬ At least they shared bersama¬¬
ΓÖ¬ On the battle of the mighty ship ΓÖ¬
¬ ¬ Letters never exist is much more specific ¬ ¬ ¬
ΓΓ¬ Say goodbye, goodbye, Mrs. Sullivan ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ And don't cry, cry, cry, cry, cry Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ We are sorry to inform you ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ The Navy keeps your children away ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ All five, five, five, five Γ €
Γ ¬ So save your blue star in the window Γ¬
John, can you bring the lamp down a little?
Don't bring them down a bit?
¬ ¬ It is not difficult to reach back to the day Γ¬¬¬
ΓÖ¬ When the war finally returns ΓÖ¬
¬ ¬ Uncle Sam, he will send you a telegram ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ So he doesn't need to tell you by telephone Γ¬
ΓΓ I heard he cracked Γ¬¬¬
ΓΓ¬ When they know what war can cost Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ When all five of his sons ¬Ö¬
¬ ¬ lost Is missing ¬¬
ΓÖ¬ They are ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ Say goodbye, goodbye, Mrs. Sullivan ΓÖ¬
Γ¬ Go ahead and cry Γ¬
¬¬ Go ahead and cry menangis¬
ΓÖ¬ We are sorry to inform you ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ That all your sons have died ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ All five, five, five, five Γ €
ΓÖ¬ So change your blue star to gold ΓÖ¬
¬ ¬ Blue stars to gold ¬ ¬ ¬
ΓÖ¬ Come on, mama ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Turn them into gold ΓÖ¬
- This is how it usually is
in each city.
People grow up.
They are married.
They have children.
They continue.
Good times are _ loved and remembered.
When you see a fierce man in his own bar,
drink,
he's also a bro one day.
There are five Sullivan Bros.
from this city
who will be loved has returned here.
I try to remind myself as much as possible.
- Hey, this is Corey Ford with KFUK radio.
Okay, damn Cedar Falls.
This will be a fun day in Iowa.
This will be an amazing day in the Cedar Valley.
Our future bright.
And for the last time,
this applies to bro.
ΓÖ¬ They hate you for reasons ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Finding all your mistakes ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ They hid behind ΓÖ¬
¬¬¬ Picture perfect lie ΓΓ¬
ΓÖ¬ They found you in the corner ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ Dust for ΓÖ¬ fingerprints
ΓÖ¬ From a fairly painted page cukupÖ¬
Γ¬¬ Image of your sin ¬¬
Γ¬ Give me ig-ig-ignorance ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Give what you can give Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ig-Ig-Ignorance ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Hit them with ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ What did they give ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Alright now ΓÖ¬
ΓΓ¬ Put it on the table ΓÖ¬
¬¬¬ Watch to divert eyes ¬¬¬
Γ ¬ Serving cold revenge ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ ¬ With a side of revenge ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ But satisfaction does not come easily ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ But to take everything easily ΓÖ¬
¬ ¬ Well, I think they are guests ¬¬
Γ ¬ All just better leave Γ¬¬
Γ¬ Give me ig-ig-ignorance ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Give what you can give Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ig-Ig-Ignorance ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Hit them with ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ What did they give ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Alright now ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ignorance ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Give what you can give Γ ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ignorance ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Hit them with ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ What did they give ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ignorance ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Give what you can give Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ignorance ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Hit them with ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ What did they give ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Give them ignorance ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Give what you can give Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ignorance ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Hit them with ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ What did they give ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Give them ignorance ΓÖ¬
Γ ¬ Give what you can give Γ¬
ΓÖ¬ Ignorance ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ Hit them with ΓÖ¬
ΓÖ¬ What did they give ΓÖ