NAKED HARBOUR
I'm getting married.
Whatever...
Where's my money?
We gave you more time.
Gimme your wallet! Where's my money?
Listen up. If you don't pay within a week-
I'll screw the bitch as payment. Got it?
Heel!
Max, heel!
Hi. - Hi.
No homework? - Waiting for Mom, forgot my keys.
Should I come and baby-sit again? - No.
I've got the new Singstar. If you wanna try it out?
Are you eating chocolate? Give me some so you won't get fat.
People eat chocolate when they're in love. Are you in love?
Thanks.
Hi.
How did it go? - Great. You'll see.
They said I've got talent. They'll call.
It's a bit stuffy in here.
I'm pretty sure they'll pick me.
Super food, full grain!
If you work out, you gotta eat properly.
We've got some heavy training ahead of us today.
Unsalted porridge.
Salt is for old women who can't taste anything.
Feel this, feel it!
I don't want to.
Pumping iron! With the guys!
Look att his.
It's fat. This here is fat.
But it's firm on the surface.
It's fat. Viscelar fat. - Even though it's firm?
Yes. It's engorged around the organs.
But there's hardly any on the surface.
What you need now is gym, gym and gym, and a strict diet.
Do we have a deal? Good.
A friend lent me the cash. - It's fucking awesome!
Put it on.
Not so rough. Gently!
I do.
More champagne!
There's mud water in the glass.
How did it get in there? - I can't tell.
Lauri, pass me the knife.
I need to answer this.
Finally the day of the ball came.
The stepsisters left for the castle, and Cinderella felt so very sad.
When they had gone, she burst into tears.
Why can't the prince find Cinderella?
He does, in the end.
They're wimps...
Give me kisses...
You've got a banana in your hand. - I feel dirty already.
That's not erotic at all. That's disgusting.
What's wrong with you today?
Stop whining and try to have some fun.
What are you staring at?
Try running this zoo for just one day, you'd know how tiring it is.
The kids are in daycare. - Even so.
I've tried to explain a hundred times, but you just don't get it.
Good night.
I don't wanna go. - Come along now.
Mom, where's Moomin?
Moomin's seeing the doctor today, he'll make his foot better.
I love you.
You mean so much to me.
You know how hard it is to leave work in the middle of the day?
I haven't got time for this. - Wait.
"I've loved you the most. Yours, Marika."
Why are you giving me this?
Hey, honey...
I want Walt to sing solo for the chorus...
Must I? - Yes, it will sound good.
The rest of you will join in at the end.
Shut your face!
Look who's here...
Russkie! - Commie!
Homo!
Next!
Hi, I'm Milla... - Hi.
Hi, I'm Milla. I can do anything.
So what do you do for a living? - Nothing, at the moment.
Ok, so let's take a few shots.
Just look at the camera, you know what to do. Flirt a little.
Push your hips forward, you look like a friggin' pickle.
Maybe you should sing something? - Ok.
Thank you.
You did good. Great attitude.
How was school today? - It was Ok.
What was for lunch? - Sausages.
Sausages, pig food. Flour and water.
And after school?
I came here and had some of that chicken vegetable stew of yours.
Excellent! Now wasn't it tasty? - I guess.
You gotta eat five times a day. And then what?
Peltsi's dad bought me a burger. - You ate a burger?
Jesus Christ! What did we agree about burgers?
We don't eat burgers! - No.
And you guzzled a giant burger, splattering grease down your chin!
I thought we had a fucking deal!
We're in training and we don't eat crap!
Ok, sorry.
What did we agree about kebabs and pizzas and burgers!
They're pig food!
Forcing a kid to eat shit like that-
while we had a fucking deal!
Don't you have any-fucking-thing else to fucking say?
Nope. Don't go anywhere. Listen to me.
Look me in the eye. Apologize. - Sorry.
Promise we won't eat any more junk? - Ok, Ok.
Now go to your room. You're grounded for a week.
God damnit!
Nice apartment.
Is there someone here?
I have someone with me.
This is Antero. - Hey.
This is my son.
Look at all the food he brought us. We'll have a feast.
Well, howdy ho.
How's it hanging, son? You speak Finnish?
I've got something for you. For keeps.
What do you say? - Thanks.
No problem. - We'll eat soon.
We could go see a match together this weekend.
Or during the week, since I'm on leave.
Unemployment leave.
Hey, Walt. Give us a hand.
We're playing Singstar, I can't get it to...
Come here.
It's more fun when there's three. - Walt's such a good singer.
I can't get it to work.
Elvis! I mean Pelvis!
When do people die?
Every single person is born, grows up and dies.
First you're born, then you grow into a little girl and then you die.
Are your eyes closed when you die? - Could be.
It's a little like sleeping. - Where do people go when they die?
In our religion people go to Heaven.
I don't wanna die yet.
You don't need to worry about it.
I'm sure you'll get to live tens and tens and tens of years.
You too.
I need money. At least six grand.
Come here.
I want you to do something to me.
Like what?
Shit...
Fuck...
I love you. - I love you too.
I promise to protect you.
Give me some space. Just a little room!
Don't star eat me like that. I'm getting out of here.
Iiris, where are you going? - None of your fucking business.
Get your hands off!
Who wants to stay in your grandma's stinking flat?
Stay home. I haven't got any money.
God, those paintings are ugly. Who is that fucking cow anyway?
Get your hands off me, nigger.
This god damned door...
Iiris, honey!
Iiris!
What's wrong? - Ok, I forgive you.
Can we go to the bar now?
Sorry, I'm sorry.
Got any fags? - No man, sorry.
You have one?
Draw the name and picture of the person you love the most-
there, in that circle in the centre.
Who would you miss the most if you never saw them again?
It can be your mom or dad, or both of them.
Or just your mom.
And the next ring is for the second dearest person-
and so on.
Very good.
And write their names too.
MAX MOM
I'm so happy you're here to meet me.
Good dog, best dog.
I'm having some cereal. What are you having?
Wait, wait. Now! - No!
Hey, Walt. Wanna go out and play football or something?
Football? It's too cold outside.
Then go to the other room and watch some TV.
We'll call you back in.
Would you stop staring?
You're driving me crazy. - Likewise.
Stop clinging!
Want a beer?
As long as it's cold.
You seeing someone? - Yes.
Would you like to see my new tattoo?
Would you?
I wish you would sometimes stay and sleep next to me.
When you wander alone in the night, you might meet someone your kind.
Together, the road is lighter.
Out you go!
No loitering. Out to the yard.
Excellent!
Go for it! Great!
Now box!
Great. Gimme some porn. Gimme porn!
Can I help you?
I'm here to see Anders. - Over here.
Wait over there. There's food and stuff.
Pretend it's your ex-boyfriend. Orhis new girlfriend.
Punch! With both hands.
Grit your teeth!
Hi.
Remember me? - Of course.
I just... If you choose me, you can do anything you want to me.
Anything.
What are you talking about? I'm just the photographer.
I have these photos.
And really, I'm willing to do anything...
Could you take pictures of me?
I don't make those decisions. It's not up to me.
If you could take pictures of me... Pictures like... you know.
I'd do anything, anything at all.
Can you take pictures of me?
Okay.
I'll do anything... - I said Ok.
Ok. - Ok.
What do you want? What can you do?
Do you play an instrument?
Can you dance? Can you?
I don't know.
Some Big Brother-type thing could suit you.
You wereon it. I remember.
Will youtake picturesof me?
I'll do anything.
Look, I have these tattoos.
You can'twalk around showing pictures like that of yourself.
Saying that you're willing to do anything. It's real stupid.
We're all young once. Even me.
It's a disease that cures itself over time.
So it's nothing to be ashamed of. Ok?
I'm not that young.
I mean... Lots of stars start off young.
Like Britney and Rihanna, theywere 16 too.
What do you want to be? A celebrity? A model?
I just don't want to be ordinary.
I want my name to ring bells. To stand out from the crowd.
So you just want to be a celebrity? - I don't want to be ordinary.
I want my name to ring bells.
Leave me a bite.
Huh? - Leave me a bite.
You're on a diet. - Just leave me some.
Fuck off! - Fuck off!
You should be training.
- Take it easy, Dad.
Let's go. We have to stick to our agreement.
I'm down to my last coin.
But you've got unpaid winnings. Just twenty cents?
You'll pay me back? - Absolutely.
You're fucking unbelievable!
I want cider! - We need money.
If I leave you, you'll be all alone.
You'll never find somebody new.
A lazy parasite like you, who can't get anything done.
How do you think you'll get the money?
By pacing around the flat?
"We need money". "Ukki will help". "We need money".
Think hiding athome will help?
I can makeone phone call-
and screw more than you could earn in a year.
I wanna go to Amsterdam.
They're so laid-back there.
Think we should go?
Wecould just lie in the sun.
Can we get some drinks over here?
If you want change, only you can make it happen.
I've tried talking, but our life just drags on.
Lfeel so totally alone.
We have to stop seeing each other.
This is not a solution. - Why not?
Right.
Pertti. - Tanja.
Hi. - Hi.
Your keys.
And then... chocolate. Dark chocolate.
Very kind.
What? - Very kind.
It's healthy.
What's that sound?
My mother, she's sick.
Could we go to yourroom? - Ok.
Want me to talk dirty?
First, I lost seven kilos.
But oversix months I gained it all back.
Just one cider, I'll pay you back.
Man, you're stingy.
Can you spare a couple of euros?
You look like you can afford to buy mea beer.
Fucking Russkie fag!
What if he was Russian? - He wasn't.
I told you... Sorry, sorry.
Where have you been?
Why are you still up? Got hungry?
Remember, no midnight feasting!
Prowling like a hungry wolf.
Go to bed! And no computer games!
Ok? Good night.
If you had three wishes what would they be?
Come.
You sure about this?
Yes.
You look more grown up.
In a good way.
Or in some way.
You too, in some way.
So herewe are.
I have to go.
"I've loved you the most. Yours, Marika".
Okay.
Greatest love.
First love.
I can't take this.
I don't think my wife would appreciate it.
So, take care. - Bye.
Bye.
We have to getaway from here. - Where to?
Fucking anywhere. Hawaii, India, wherever.
We'll just get screwed even worse if we listen to Ukki'sadvice.
Hey, trust me.
Ukkisaid he'd bring us a solution.
You're fucking unbelievable.
Fuck, take this. I want a fucking divorce.
I've had enough. We're through.
Whattook you so long? - I broughta solution.
You brought cider?
Got anything to eat? My energy level is...
Don't you guys ever clean up here? - I keep asking that, too.
Merry Christmas. - Where's the cider?
A Christmas tree is your solution? - Yes.
Here's the solution. - Santa masks?
You and your fucking solutions. You can't be serious.
You got an attitude?
Do you understand?
Boys, is everything Ok? - Just kidding around.
I wanted to do a backward flip on the trampoline.
Theother kids never let me play with them.
It's weird.
First you are born, then you grow into a little girl.
And then you die.
Mom, you went over my angel. - See, it's here.
Mom...
Your sister is here.
Ok, let's get you dressed.
Could you try cheering up a little?
However the tests turn out, you mustn't lose hope.
Miracles do happen.
Be quiet!
Aleksi!
You have to train Max better. He's your responsibility.
Sorry.
The whole building can hear him. Take him to yourroom.
Max, come.
How was your day? - Fine.
Aleksi!
What is this?
Max pooped, I had to clean it up. - With a dishrag?
You used a fucking dishrag to clean up poop?
We've got toilet paper, paper towels, anything else.
I'm supposed to wipe the table with it now?
Come here.
Pick up the rag.
Take it! Smell it!
I'm supposed to hold this in my hand?
Smell it!
Smell the rag!
You know what it is? Shit!
Damnit!
You're 7 years old. You should beableto handle responsibility.
Good dog.
Oh, my. Now, watch out.
Help! Look!
What if it falls? - You ready?
One... Hopla! - One more time.
There you are.
We want more!
How can it be like this? - Then don't.
I'll just finish this. - You've had enough.
I'll finish this and go home.
You'll never guess-
but the world's sweetest photographer asked meout on a date.
That's not erotic...
That's nice.
What if he doesn't show up?
You'd hold your penis like that?
I mean, do you think he could actually like me?
There's nothing wrong with you.
You'rea great girl.
Holy shit, Pertti!
What a man! Do that zumba!
I wanna sing karaoke.
Feel it...
Let go, asshole.
Shit...
Now I know why I'm not losing anyweight-
even though I've been working out like crazy.
It must be water retention.
Pertti. - Yes?
Is this really your problem?
I worry about my son, Teemu. How he'll cope in this harsh world.
Women want men to betough.
They don't like softies. I don't want him to inherit my belly.
Max, heel!
Max!
Max, come back!
Whywas Max waiting outside the building alone?
You can't leave him alone and just walk off.
What happened?
Max is your responsibility. Don't start acting like your father.
Take Max.
Good dog.
Hi. - Hi.
Is my taxi here?
If you've got the time-
you could empty the ashes from the fireplace.
Ok. - Good.
It looks pretty serious.
I suggest we run some more tests.
Mommy, do you have the devil in your head?
I'm going. - Bye.
I have some interesting guests.
As long as your philosophy is that you're willing to do anything-
you'll wind up in situations.
Whatkind of situations?
The kind where publicity is on offer.
But at a high cost.
Isn't that what you want, fame?
Publicity, expressly?
It's always been your dream? - Yes.
What are we going to do? - You'll see.
Sure you're willing to do anything? - Yes.
And you've really thought about what that means?
Rebecca has an offer for you.
If I were you, I'd think carefully before taking it up.
You brought me here. - But it's your choice.
One should try everything, right?
Can we trust them?
You can always trust a sailor. And the Chinese.
It'll never work out.
You know what your problem is?
You talk too much. I'm not buying it.
Show some respect! I'm doing this for Makke.
You've screwed up your brain with drugs.
Tell me, where's your woman? Never seen her around.
Bet you don't get much pussy with a face like that.
Your life's over. Done.
You're fucking jealous. - I'll be glad to get rid of you.
You'rea bloodsucker, living in my mother's apartment.
You can't even get laid. - Welfarecase...
Your problem isthat you're so fucking lonely.
If you don't shut your mouth, I'll stick my dick in it.
Your tiny shrimp in my mouth is not gonna happen.
Pathetic wanker!
God, I need a cider!
Don't we have anything to eat? Jesus, it stinks.
You're just an old alkie. - So you give us a plan!
Here's a plan! I'll jump.
You want me to jump? Do you?
Makke, do you want me to jump?
Getaway from there.
What would you do if you were me?
Hi.
I just need a little more time...
I had itfor you, I had the money...
I'll take careof it.
Payback time.
I know...
Don't!
Can't we settle this some other way?
Come on...
I said I'd...
He was covered in vomit and feces, so we had to bag him.
You shouldn't buy cider for an underage boy.
Mom...
Will you be Ok here?
Hold your hands up.
Mom...
Let's turn you sideways, in case you need to throw up.
Mom... - Daddy's here. Daddy's here.
Come and see who gets voted out next. How did it go?
Fine... I'm tired.
Want something to eat?
Let's go.
To the car.
You have to get used to this.
You have to get used to this, if I'm not around.
Mommy, why can't I go stay with Daddy?
I want to be a princess.
When I get married, I'll never unmarry.
Twinkle, twinkle, little star, how I wonder where you are...
Sing some more.
The judges haven't decided whether you get to continue.
Russkie!
There.
Aleksi...
I've thinking about our situation, or I mean Max.
Ljust feel this apartment's a bit small for such a fine dog.
Max needs morespace.
Freedom to run, fresh air.
I know you love him very much-
but I really feel weshould send him back to the country.
Sorry. This is my fault.
Don't worry. You'll have lots offriends in the country.
This is a robbery!
Keep your hands in sight!
Lie down! All of you, lie down!
Get up! - Head down!
Put it in there. Don't move!
Faster!
Head down! Lied own!
Now, sing a Christmas song, all of you!
All together.
Found the good stuff!
You got the money?
Let's go!
Shit!
Hi.
What a trip.
What?
Where are the kids? - Staying at Grandma's.
We have a guest coming. - Oh?
Okay.
Is it like a surprise?
Maybe.
That suits you...
Aha. - Hi.
What is this?
You know Viivi, right?
I thought we'd have a drink together before we eat.
Yes.
I bought that excellent sparkling wine. We had it once.
Where was it again? In Rome?
Will you have some with us? Sparkling wine?
White wine? I'll get some.
Make yourself at home.
Truth ordare? You get to choose.
Viivi. - What?
Truth or dare. - Truth.
Truth.
Well...
That dissertation of yours, what's it about?
It's about social networksand...
Their building... - Development.
Development. The development of social networks.
Ok, so that's what you do.
And you do it with Lauri...
We've talked about it sometimes. - What else do you do?
I do research on media and group behaviour.
She is one intelligent woman!
How people behave in groups, like on realityTV.
How come you suddenly don't understand anything?
I'm trying. I'm trying to understand what this is all about.
That's the whole point. - It can't be all that hard.
It's like group behaviour, in a miniature world.
Likeour family here, for example.
Our home. I do understand.
More wine, anyone?
Viivi probably wants some. A lot. I presume.
Since you have a sexual relationship.
But Viivi, if youtake money andthen fuck that bastard-
it makes you a whore. - No.
How's that? - Seems I'm in love with him.
But why.
Can he fuck you up the ass?
Yes.
Listen, Viivi. I haven't wanted to have sex with him in years.
It's awful, but I'm just not interested.
But aren't these... habits like a personal matter?
Yes. Yes.
But in this case it kind of concerns me too-
since that prick is myhusband.
You said it.
But can you really own somebody? - Listen, Viivi. We need to...
We're married and have kids, there's a system, see.
I have so much going on right now, I don't have time for a divorce.
Forfuck's sake. - What?
Come on.
Itwould be nice to know how Viivi comes.
Or is the word 'come' just for men? Do women come?
I wouldn't know, it's been so long since I had sex.
Are you going to keep this up for long?
No, I'm just thinking, about our common history.
Our sexual history. Which is short.
And you've always blamed me for it.
Ok, let's drink and go to the sauna.
We'll go to the sauna, right? - Right.
To the sauna. - Fine.
I just can't...
Wow, that's super cool.
Have you... Of course you've seen it, how stupid of me.
I'm leaving. - Yourfee.
No, thank you. - Come on, it's tax deductible.
Bye.
The last two...
What happened to us?
What do you want?
Is it just because you're not getting sex?
I loved you.
I've done everything I can.
Just go! I won't let you blackmail me with the kids.
You're so damned selfish, you're destroying our family.
So fucking selfish!
Fuck off!
We can go.
I hate you!
You destroyed my family!
Good going!
Should we go all the way? - It's too steep.
We won't make it all the way. - Sure we will.
I wantto apologize to you, I've been a total mess.
Why isn't my belly getting any smaller?
Or maybe it has, just a little. - It has, a little.
All this is firm, here...
Your belly's Ok.
Your mom didn't like it.
It can't have been just about the belly.
We have to face the fact-
there's just the two of us now.
I know. - Throw some water.
You get to makea wish. Blow on it.
Did you make a wish? Ah, don'ttell.
Where is she? She's an hour late.
Just go alone.
Women always survive.
I'm married. - Yeah, right.
She'll find someone new and...
She's not coming.
We have to go.
The ship won'twait.
Stop!
Take your fucking hands off! I'm freezing to death!
And take the bag.
I'm really pissed off. I've been waiting forever.
You got, like, tickets for us? What's that bag doing there?
I'm fucking freezing!
Don't run.
Thanks, Dad.
No problem.
Sure you'll beOk?
Where's the ship headed? What do we do next?
Ukki arranged it all. - Ok, I'll calm down.
Know what? This is our honeymoon.
I fucking hope they have cider.
And hey, we'll never get divorced.
If I don't get somecider I won't beable to swallow.
Put Max in the car.
Max, begood.
Don't bark on the way over, or Mom will get mad.
Don't forget me.
I love you. - Aleksi, get out of the way.
Go to bed early, I won't be in until late.
Big boy.
Max looked so happy out there in thecountry.
You don't have to beworried. - I'm not.
How about we go buy some candy? - No.
I thought you liked the coloured ones? - I don't.
They may have some of those black ones this time.
Hey, how about some ice-cream? - Ok.
Chocolate flavour for me.
For you, goat.
We're not going to continue your treatment...
You can do anything to me.
The dog was so much trouble.
You did what? - I killed it.
Had it put down. I killed it.
How did you do it? - Keep your voice down.
It was so much trouble, just a heap of shit.
You should have made mittens out of it.
They're looking for singers for a new show. Did you see?
You're good at singing.
I'm not interested, Dad, Not anymore.
Oh?
I just wantt o be ordinary.
Viivi?
I don't think I'll ever beable to handlea new relationship.
Let's just be here now.
Mommy?
Will Daddy come back when you're better?
Wecan manage like this.
I have something for you.
I don't want it.
Hurry up or you'll be late from school.
I have to be somewhere too. - Where?
Job centre. I have an appointment.
Oh, by the way. I broke up with Antero.
Good. He was a fucking walrus.
You can't get dressed here, faggot!
Get the hell out of here!
Did you hear me?
You didn't hear me?
Just go into the corridor.
Did you hear me?
What the fuck?
You still want to spit?
Do you?
You're going to die.
Hi. - Hi.
Wanna come and sing? - Now?
Now is a good time.